moonliitneed

[moonliitneed]

may 3rd will mark one month of being on hiatus

i’m hoping to have some sort of update ready for y’all by the 3rd

#angel’s hiatus

[moonliitneed]

curious

[moonliitneed]

curious

[moonliitneed]

curious

#angel’s hiatus

[moonliitneed]

imagine being beautiful

[moonliitneed]

Update on my hiatus

CW: mentions of coercion, negative self imagine and self relationship…. and potentially bad grammar and typos 

So, i’ve been thinking a bit about my possible eventual return. I’ve no idea how long i’d like this hiatus to be or if i want to truly come back or not. But i want to have a candid conversation about why i chose to take a hiatus and how it’s effecting me.

As for the why: 

I was reaching a point where i was completely unable to look at my body in anyway shape or form. Every time I’d log in, i would see someone who i think is beautiful and i would look at them and realize i don’t think anyone actually thinks that way about me. And i know/knew that i definitely don’t feel that way about me. I think i started to attach the value of myself to a number or to comments and interactions i was getting. and as that became less and less, so did my opinion of my body and my person. I’ve never had a good relationship with my body. In the beginning tumblr and all of this really did help to improve the relationship i has with myself. I felt sexy, i felt desirable, i felt pretty for the very first time in my life. it was the first time i didn’t feel like i was disgusting everyone by just having the body that i do. I’ve never had any irl interactions to make me feel that way or that have allowed me to explore who i am sexually. And all of this was allowing me to do it, for a while. Eventually it started to feel too much like a performance. Like i was no longer getting any joy or pleasure out of what i was doing. That i was only doing it because i felt like that’s what was being expected of me. 

at some point i was so concerned with pleasing other people and appearing desirable that i just stopped being fully honest about things i actually enjoy and things that i don’t. I’d like to say right here and right now that there has been absolutely ZERO coercion with another party towards me. There was no true external pressure that pushed me to make these decisions, it was fully my own doing. I am not trying to put blame on anyone but myself and i’m sure as hell not trying to worry anyone who has had any sort of sexual encounter with me. 

To return to what I was saying, I started to push my boundaries in a way that was not healthy, i’m not entirely sure why i was doing that, but. i did.

I started to loose any desire i had towards existing sexually with others and my libido was basically gone. 

Originally, i put this entirely on stress and hormones

However, to move on to how this hiatus has effected me:

I have felt so much better in these almost 20 days than i have in a while. I’m starting to feel a bit more like myself. However, i think the damage i’ve done to my relationship with my body is going to take a longer time to heal. I’ve also, recently started a new journey in terms of my sexuality/identity, i think i have a lot to think about. i feel that what i had going here, may interfere with that journey. 

I am still periodically checking in. I think I may come back for text posts at some point in the near future, but other than that, i’m unsure of my return. Again, mutuals, please feel free to reach out for contact info :))

[moonliitneed]

Update on my hiatus

CW: mentions of coercion, negative self imagine and self relationship…. and potentially bad grammar and typos 

So, i’ve been thinking a bit about my possible eventual return. I’ve no idea how long i’d like this hiatus to be or if i want to truly come back or not. But i want to have a candid conversation about why i chose to take a hiatus and how it’s effecting me.

As for the why: 

I was reaching a point where i was completely unable to look at my body in anyway shape or form. Every time I’d log in, i would see someone who i think is beautiful and i would look at them and realize i don’t think anyone actually thinks that way about me. And i know/knew that i definitely don’t feel that way about me. I think i started to attach the value of myself to a number or to comments and interactions i was getting. and as that became less and less, so did my opinion of my body and my person. I’ve never had a good relationship with my body. In the beginning tumblr and all of this really did help to improve the relationship i has with myself. I felt sexy, i felt desirable, i felt pretty for the very first time in my life. it was the first time i didn’t feel like i was disgusting everyone by just having the body that i do. I’ve never had any irl interactions to make me feel that way or that have allowed me to explore who i am sexually. And all of this was allowing me to do it, for a while. Eventually it started to feel too much like a performance. Like i was no longer getting any joy or pleasure out of what i was doing. That i was only doing it because i felt like that’s what was being expected of me. 

at some point i was so concerned with pleasing other people and appearing desirable that i just stopped being fully honest about things i actually enjoy and things that i don’t. I’d like to say right here and right now that there has been absolutely ZERO coercion with another party towards me. There was no true external pressure that pushed me to make these decisions, it was fully my own doing. I am not trying to put blame on anyone but myself and i’m sure as hell not trying to worry anyone who has had any sort of sexual encounter with me. 

To return to what I was saying, I started to push my boundaries in a way that was not healthy, i’m not entirely sure why i was doing that, but. i did.

I started to loose any desire i had towards existing sexually with others and my libido was basically gone. 

Originally, i put this entirely on stress and hormones

However, to move on to how this hiatus has effected me:

I have felt so much better in these almost 20 days than i have in a while. I’m starting to feel a bit more like myself. However, i think the damage i’ve done to my relationship with my body is going to take a longer time to heal. I’ve also, recently started a new journey in terms of my sexuality/identity, i think i have a lot to think about. i feel that what i had going here, may interfere with that journey. 

I am still periodically checking in. I think I may come back for text posts at some point in the near future, but other than that, i’m unsure of my return. Again, mutuals, please feel free to reach out for contact info :))

[moonliitneed]

Update on my hiatus

CW: mentions of coercion, negative self imagine and self relationship…. and potentially bad grammar and typos 

So, i’ve been thinking a bit about my possible eventual return. I’ve no idea how long i’d like this hiatus to be or if i want to truly come back or not. But i want to have a candid conversation about why i chose to take a hiatus and how it’s effecting me.

As for the why: 

I was reaching a point where i was completely unable to look at my body in anyway shape or form. Every time I’d log in, i would see someone who i think is beautiful and i would look at them and realize i don’t think anyone actually thinks that way about me. And i know/knew that i definitely don’t feel that way about me. I think i started to attach the value of myself to a number or to comments and interactions i was getting. and as that became less and less, so did my opinion of my body and my person. I’ve never had a good relationship with my body. In the beginning tumblr and all of this really did help to improve the relationship i has with myself. I felt sexy, i felt desirable, i felt pretty for the very first time in my life. it was the first time i didn’t feel like i was disgusting everyone by just having the body that i do. I’ve never had any irl interactions to make me feel that way or that have allowed me to explore who i am sexually. And all of this was allowing me to do it, for a while. Eventually it started to feel too much like a performance. Like i was no longer getting any joy or pleasure out of what i was doing. That i was only doing it because i felt like that’s what was being expected of me. 

at some point i was so concerned with pleasing other people and appearing desirable that i just stopped being fully honest about things i actually enjoy and things that i don’t. I’d like to say right here and right now that there has been absolutely ZERO coercion with another party towards me. There was no true external pressure that pushed me to make these decisions, it was fully my own doing. I am not trying to put blame on anyone but myself and i’m sure as hell not trying to worry anyone who has had any sort of sexual encounter with me. 

To return to what I was saying, I started to push my boundaries in a way that was not healthy, i’m not entirely sure why i was doing that, but. i did.

I started to loose any desire i had towards existing sexually with others and my libido was basically gone. 

Originally, i put this entirely on stress and hormones

However, to move on to how this hiatus has effected me:

I have felt so much better in these almost 20 days than i have in a while. I’m starting to feel a bit more like myself. However, i think the damage i’ve done to my relationship with my body is going to take a longer time to heal. I’ve also, recently started a new journey in terms of my sexuality/identity, i think i have a lot to think about. i feel that what i had going here, may interfere with that journey. 

I am still periodically checking in. I think I may come back for text posts at some point in the near future, but other than that, i’m unsure of my return. Again, mutuals, please feel free to reach out for contact info :))

[moonliitneed]

Update on my hiatus

CW: mentions of coercion, negative self imagine and self relationship…. and potentially bad grammar and typos 

So, i’ve been thinking a bit about my possible eventual return. I’ve no idea how long i’d like this hiatus to be or if i want to truly come back or not. But i want to have a candid conversation about why i chose to take a hiatus and how it’s effecting me.

As for the why: 

I was reaching a point where i was completely unable to look at my body in anyway shape or form. Every time I’d log in, i would see someone who i think is beautiful and i would look at them and realize i don’t think anyone actually thinks that way about me. And i know/knew that i definitely don’t feel that way about me. I think i started to attach the value of myself to a number or to comments and interactions i was getting. and as that became less and less, so did my opinion of my body and my person. I’ve never had a good relationship with my body. In the beginning tumblr and all of this really did help to improve the relationship i has with myself. I felt sexy, i felt desirable, i felt pretty for the very first time in my life. it was the first time i didn’t feel like i was disgusting everyone by just having the body that i do. I’ve never had any irl interactions to make me feel that way or that have allowed me to explore who i am sexually. And all of this was allowing me to do it, for a while. Eventually it started to feel too much like a performance. Like i was no longer getting any joy or pleasure out of what i was doing. That i was only doing it because i felt like that’s what was being expected of me. 

at some point i was so concerned with pleasing other people and appearing desirable that i just stopped being fully honest about things i actually enjoy and things that i don’t. I’d like to say right here and right now that there has been absolutely ZERO coercion with another party towards me. There was no true external pressure that pushed me to make these decisions, it was fully my own doing. I am not trying to put blame on anyone but myself and i’m sure as hell not trying to worry anyone who has had any sort of sexual encounter with me. 

To return to what I was saying, I started to push my boundaries in a way that was not healthy, i’m not entirely sure why i was doing that, but. i did.

I started to loose any desire i had towards existing sexually with others and my libido was basically gone. 

Originally, i put this entirely on stress and hormones

However, to move on to how this hiatus has effected me:

I have felt so much better in these almost 20 days than i have in a while. I’m starting to feel a bit more like myself. However, i think the damage i’ve done to my relationship with my body is going to take a longer time to heal. I’ve also, recently started a new journey in terms of my sexuality/identity, i think i have a lot to think about. i feel that what i had going here, may interfere with that journey. 

I am still periodically checking in. I think I may come back for text posts at some point in the near future, but other than that, i’m unsure of my return. Again, mutuals, please feel free to reach out for contact info :))

#i’ll be check in through out the night #life updates with angel #angel’s hiatus

[moonliitneed]

I’m seriously considering taking a hiatus, at this point it would be for an unknown period of time. I just think in order to protect my mental health and my relationship with my body, that this may end up being the best thing for me. However, nothing has been decided yet. I’m going to take the day to think about it.

Thank you for all the patience and support you guys have given me over the last, almost, 2 years.

mutuals, please feel free to reach out for my discord if you don’t have it already 💜

#a reminder

[moonliitneed]

briefly popping in to once again comaplain about only being horny while on my period this month

this is cruel

i just have no where else to complain lol

[moonliitneed]

i have decided that i will be on hiatus

my OF will be free while i am

i’ll put a sub fee back when ever i come back

i’ll see y’all around 💜

I’m seriously considering taking a hiatus, at this point it would be for an unknown period of time. I just think in order to protect my mental health and my relationship with my body, that this may end up being the best thing for me. However, nothing has been decided yet. I’m going to take the day to think about it.

Thank you for all the patience and support you guys have given me over the last, almost, 2 years.

mutuals, please feel free to reach out for my discord if you don’t have it already 💜

#angel's works of art #angel’s hiatus

[moonliitneed]

I’m seriously considering taking a hiatus, at this point it would be for an unknown period of time. I just think in order to protect my mental health and my relationship with my body, that this may end up being the best thing for me. However, nothing has been decided yet. I’m going to take the day to think about it.

Thank you for all the patience and support you guys have given me over the last, almost, 2 years.

mutuals, please feel free to reach out for my discord if you don’t have it already 💜

[moonliitneed]

I’m seriously considering taking a hiatus, at this point it would be for an unknown period of time. I just think in order to protect my mental health and my relationship with my body, that this may end up being the best thing for me. However, nothing has been decided yet. I’m going to take the day to think about it.

Thank you for all the patience and support you guys have given me over the last, almost, 2 years.

mutuals, please feel free to reach out for my discord if you don’t have it already 💜

#life updates with angel #angel’s hiatus

[moonliitneed]

pmdd in full swing

yay

[moonliitneed]

i did it

oops

#boop o meter #my finger is dying

[moonliitneed]

oops

#boop o meter