notyouramelie

[notyouramelie]

Most shows with overpowered supernatural characters always try to come up with elaborate excuses to explain why the characters can’t just magic themselves out of every situation. Good Omens doesn’t really do that, but you don’t really question it because you completely buy that these morons are so unequivocally incompetent that they straight up forget that they have the powers of fucking demigods. They’re like high-level d&d characters who only use the same three moves and have completely forgotten about the 73 magic items sitting in their inventory. 

[notyouramelie]

God, I can't tell you how much the "there's not enough enrichment in my enclosure" joke has helped my mental health. Because, for some reason I can't comprehend, pretending that I'm a zoo keeper caring for an animal (which is also me) just makes everything easier to comprehend. Like "Your head gets screwey when you're apartment is messy" just doesn't carry as much resonance as "The tiger becomes agitated when its enclosure is cluttered" because then I'll be like, no shit? The tiger? I've gotta keep things nice and clean for the tiger.

[notyouramelie]

i have this disease called i will open your message and get distracted and forget to reply and then the notification will be gone so i will not have replied for ages and you will think i am ignoring you but. i am not. it’s incurable

[notyouramelie]

I gave my soapbox speech about how weight loss is mostly bullshit to two different patients in a row yesterday and so help me I’m pretty sure one of these days someone is going to say “but SURELY you agree I’d be HEALTHIER if I lost weight!” bc you can see the disbelief in their eyes. And like. Sure, maybe! You might see some improvement in biomarkers like LDL and A1c, and your knees would probably feel better. But you would be amazed at how much more good you can do for yourself by focusing on things you can actually meaningfully change without resorting to making yourself miserable. Eat more fresh fruits and vegetables—it’s hard bc they’re more difficult to prepare and more expensive per calorie and go bad faster than other foods, but they’re what we evolved eating the most of so they’re what our bodies need the most of. And walk around more; sure, cardio is great for you, but if it sucks so bad you don’t do it, it isn’t doing shit for you. And we evolved to walk very very long distances, a little bit at a time, so our bodies respond actually very well to adding walks into our schedules, which is vastly easier than adding workouts that are frankly designed to be punishing when the definition of punishing is “makes you less likely to do it again in the future.”

You get one life. It is shorter than you can begin to imagine. Don’t waste it hating yourself because somebody is going to make money off that self-hatred. You deserve better than to be a cash cow for billionaires who pay aestheticians and dermatologists to make them (or at least their trophy wives) look thin and beautiful no matter what they actually do.

[notyouramelie]

My gender is Homosexula

[notyouramelie]

[notyouramelie]

[notyouramelie]

[notyouramelie]

Me, just trying to read my book in bed:

@mothman-etd walking into the room: hey, so do you know who the Onceler is?

Me:

And then he left.

[notyouramelie]

The older I get the more I admire people who are earnestly, genuinely into whatever their thing is. I know it sounds like an annoying cliche but unless you're being cruel or hurtful there is really no need to be normal about things. The dude with the bad fake accent at the renaissance faire is having the time of his life. The people having photoshoots with their fashion dolls are loving it. The old lady with a yard unreasonably full of tacky ass lawn ornaments is having a blast, HOA be damned.

Don't waste your time being too cool to have fun, y'know?

[notyouramelie]

So earlier in art class today, someone drew a characters hands in their pockets and mentioned that hands are really like the ultimate end boss of art, and most of us wholeheartedly agreed. So then, our teacher went ahead and free handed like a handful of hands on the board, earning a woah from a couple of students. So the one from earlier mentioned how it barely took the teacher ten seconds to do what I can’t do in three hours. And you know what he responded?

“It didn’t take me ten seconds, it took me forty years.”

And you know, that stuck with me somehow. Because yeah. Drawing a hand didn’t take him fourth years. But learning and practicing to draw a hand in ten seconds did. And I think there’s something to learn there but it’s so warm and my brain is fried so I can’t formulate the actual morale of the lesson.

[notyouramelie]

therapist: so, how have you been coping with your anxiety lately?

Me, nervously: Well… I’ve been trying to treat myself like a nervous cat…

therapist, stifling a goodnatured laugh: Oh? can you explain that to me?

Me: Well… if you have a nervous cat, the first thing you do is make sure their environment is safe and remove stressors… and you make sure they have enough food and water and places to hide… and you provide some enrichment in case they need to work out energy…

Therapist: And how are you applying that to yourself?

Me: Um. If I feel anxious, I’ll see if I need to back out of any sites or conversations, enforce my boundaries… check my environment for flashing lights or painful noises… make sure I’m hydrated and have eaten… and work on a hobby

Therapist: those are all excellent things! You’re a nervous cat and you need care and kindness!

[notyouramelie]

impostor syndrome is a common problem in academia. For example my colleagues keep putting me in the airlock and ejecting me into space

[notyouramelie]

impostor syndrome is a common problem in academia. For example my colleagues keep putting me in the airlock and ejecting me into space

[notyouramelie]

being an adult and trying to be "responsible with my money" is so hard like literally what corners am I supposed to be cutting on this budget. what am I supposed to stop spending money on. my anxiety meds? food for my cats? impulsive takeout orders? spotify premium? patreon artists who draw huge throbbing monster dicks? all of these are completely necessary to maintain my quality of life.

[notyouramelie]

[notyouramelie]

Actual roman epitaph for a dog