ozeeme-blog - Tumblr blog

ozeeme-blog · 7 years

Text

Thoughts From A First-time Mom

I am 35 years old when I got pregnant and shortly after my 36th birthday, I gave birth to my first baby. I was hoping to give birth via normal delivery but because of some circumstances, i had to undergo emergency Cesarean Section. My daughter was premature in weight when she was born. I had to leave her in the hospital because her sugar and sodium levels and platelets are being monitored. The idea of leaving her is heartbreaking. I don't live near the hospital and had to travel for at least 30 minutes to be able to see her. Another challenge I faced was breastfeeding. During the time that she was still in the hospital, I am not able to feed her because I am not producing milk even if I try so hard. No words can possibly describe exactly how I'm feeling. It's so frustrating that I want to breast-feed my daughter yet I am not able to produce milk. Making how I feel worse, I received words like i should have been producing a lot of milk since my daughter is more than a week old. I understand that while their objective is really good, they don't realize that it hurts me. I am hurting. A lot. Imagine being away from your newborn child for almost two weeks and in as much as you would want to be with her you can't because you're also recuperating from a C section. And as a mother, you'd want to give your child everything that you could but I could not produce milk for my baby. I feel like a failure. I feel like at the start of my motherhood, I have already failed as a mother. It's a devastating feeling. My self-esteem is at the bottom and I'm beginning to question my worth as a mother. Now, what is point after all my rants? These are my thoughts... If you see a woman who has just given birth, be kind to her. Give her kind words. She went through a lot already. Encourage her. Instead of saying something that would make her feel bad, surround her with positive energies. Empower her. Make her feel good about herself. Support her. Cut her some slack. Pregnancy is not easy and giving birth isn't either. Give her love. She deserves it. Just my two cents...

0 notes