papairaart

[papairaart]

[papairaart]

i cant even fathom putting a bunch of hobby stuff you never use in your house because you have money and space like some of that stuff like the basketball court...i would just go outside for that to play with other people. if you're gonna have a hobby room that collects dust at least make it a hobby known to be all about just sitting there and looking cool: collecting full metal daemon muramasa merchandise

[papairaart]

found the richtok anon was talking about omg

#if i had a house with that many rooms id have 1 room dedicated to visual novels and my friends gets to sleeps in the rest :)

[papairaart]

no cause some of the shit y'all are saying has me genuinely worried that you don't understand the difference between immigration and SETTLER COLONIALISM. y'all do realize that if jewish people just mass migrated to palestine and lived peacefully among palestinians as neighbors and countrymen, then none of this would be a problem. right? you get that, right? you get that our issue was never "there's too many jews here" but rather "why am i getting kicked out of my house." RIGHT?

[papairaart]

DONATE TODAY!!!!

[papairaart]

03/22/2024

Help me get to a job interview!!!

It's scheduled for the 26th and I need ppe and uber money, this is huge and is needed ASAP!!

Securing this employment opportunity means we won't have to struggle as much to survive, but i need to get there to make sure it happens!

Anything helps!!

$80 needed

CA: $lezsalt or $sleepyhen

VM: wildwotko

Dm for p@y pal

[papairaart]

hit head with bricka

[papairaart]

nomad put out a new code for 15% off 10gb+ esims btw

[papairaart]

All of those children would be alive and happy had hamas not attacked Israel. That's who you should blame.

Alive and happy? But for how long? 

Will they be alive and happy just to endure the next Israeli aggression on Gaza, projected to happen just within a year, the 5th or 6th one they have endured in their lifetime, which they have spent the entirety of living under Israeli siege in an open air prison?

Israel kills children without provocation. We are able to see it because we understand Israel to be a settler colonial state that adopts a settler colonial mindset. This genocidal mindset is embodied by the infamous colonel Chivington quote "kill them all, big and small, nits make lice!"

As a settler colony, it is a moral imperative - a duty - for Israel to kill off the native population. There's a reason why maternity wards in Gaza’s hospitals were destroyed and infants in incubators have been left to rot and decay. The same reason why Israel had killed over 230 children in the West Bank since 2023 alone.

What I believe you really want to say is: these children would have been alive until Israel decides to kill them.

[papairaart]

it just broke that israel has seized 1,977 acres of west bank land for settlement, which marks the largest land theft since 1993. west bank raids are also seeing an all-time high, with a a reuters article stating a series of israeli raids raised the palestinian death toll in the west bank to 10. there are palestinians being abducted as well, a lot of whom are children. the west bank is slowly being eaten up by both israeli settlers and raids, but this is barely being covered by mainstream media.

[papairaart]

Hawaii became the first state legislature to call for permanent ceasefire in Gaza

[papairaart]

sometimes i think there are certain people who don't enjoy thinking so much as they enjoy thought-shaped sensations

#my fucking mother

[papairaart]

i found cool pen

#doodle

[papairaart]

UM. THIS MORNING WE SUDDENLY REACHED $2,520/$2,850 THANKS TO A GIANT GENEROUS DONATION! only $330 left to go thank you so much !!!!! i made an update on the page about what happens when it's all raised + a picture of yusei in blob form

hi everyone i didn't want to have to do this but i'm running out of time on getting the money for my cat's eye removal surgery. she has cancer and the surgery quote we were given was to be $3.5k, give or take. it needs to be done sometime this spring.

i've had this page made for a while but i left it as a last resort. i managed to save up a portion on my own but between my existing bills and my backlog and also taxes coming up i had to make a choice. shares and donations are really appreciated, ty in advance

[papairaart]

STOP asking if i want to add tags these are follower exclusive posts.

[papairaart]

papaya be able to work uninterrupted by life bullshit on literally any day in march challenge (IMPOSSIBLE)

[papairaart]

twofold thoughts from guy who worked on it (me)

warning for spoilers and pretty extensive discussion about parental death

on february 14th of 2023 i suddenly and abruptly lost my dev twitter account.

everyone who was following my socials back then knows this. i repeatedly tried to appeal its suspension to no avail; papaira_x is just gone forever. what not a lot of people know though is that i probably would have never worked on twofold had that not happened. when i went to its associated e-mail to see why i got bonked, i found another e-mail about a pending message request from theo about how they wanted to hire me to do scripting for twofold. twitter never notified me about it; it was from a few weeks ago.

i panicked hard for multiple reasons. for one, i had no idea how to get back to them and i needed that money. for two, i had never been hired for a scripting job in my life. i could see why i had been scouted—three lilies and their ghost stories, which had been released the month prior, had some of the most active cinematography i had ever done then—but to be doing something other than artwork under someone else's supervision made me panic, just a little. what if i failed to meet their expectations?

eventually, arimia managed to get me in contact with theo (god bless her) and it was finally settled: i was going to work on twofold. i learned only post-release that had that all not happened caps and theo were just going to be resigned to caps doing the rest of the scripting because i hadn't responded, which was painful to hear for a reason you are about to see.

i was hired to script ~75k words of twofold's ~151k. the rate of completion was to be at least 1 scene a week to meet the deadline of a fall release. as you can see, i met this deadline, and even finished the large christmas script (which i had been alotted more time to complete) earlier than expected (within 1.5 weeks). i was doing this all on top of soundless stuff, other work, family issues, and at one point even the literal flu. it was ultimately not as difficult as i had feared it would be...

...on a technical level.

the majority of my assigned scenes were millie scripts. i had only read the prologue and caprice act 1 scene 1 (the internal name for the pizza party at the start of her route) prior to my start date for studying purposes, so i had no idea what caprice and millie's conflict was ultimately about. the order in which i worked on millie's scripts (it had been done on the basis of whether or not a scene's sprite assets were all available) gave me a sneaking suspicion that morphed into shock when it finally came out that everything had to do with her late mother.

i have read many visual novels in my life. since i became a fan of the genre in middle school, i've always gravitated towards heavier and more hardcore titles. i have nonchalantly picked up some horrific and nauseating and violent stories that would scare away a lot of people; there aren't many topics that kick my ass thoroughly. but the one thing that will always get me no matter what is grieving for a dead parent.

my father suddenly died when i was 17. not as young as when millie lost her mom, nor as expected. he was simply ripped away from me on an ordinary sunny day because of a heart attack. i said goodbye to him as he went on his way to the store to grab some things, then took a nap, and then when i woke up he was gone.

everything millie went through and felt was exactly how i felt and still feel. you forget their voice and exactly how they looked and the things they used to say, and you lose things that remind you of them and it's like they're dying a second time. i had an episode at the funeral because i couldn't recognize a lot of the people who came and after the service they were talking and smiling and eating like my father didn't just die. it was like i was the only one who cared he was gone. i would lash out at the world for years after and struggle to regulate my emotions. i am very lucky that i was in a position where i could not find a way to abuse substances underage.

there were times where i had to stop and step away, then there were times where i breezed through a scene because i understood. i'm very proud of the scene where millie shows olive her "train set" in particular, so much so that said train became the focus of my guest art. perhaps it's because the location i associate with my father, his backyard, is no longer accessible to me. (speaking of the guest art, i actually started and finished it a day after i was asked if i wanted to contribute a piece, but handed it over months later because i was embarrassed...)

this is all not to say it was wrong for salty salty studios to hire me without warning me. i'm not at all mad about it; i'm glad i got to channel my grief into millie. it's not like i'm often upfront about this anyways. people know me for making my very first public release a violent cult abuse story, so it's probably assumed that a much more down-to-earth story like twofold isn't gonna really make a dent in the guy who loves subarashiki hibi and full metal daemon muramasa. besides, i'm the type of person who appreciates a good cry because tears tend to just get stuck inside of me.

i love twofold a lot and i loved working on it. it is the only visual novel i broke my "no rating for things i touched" rule. millie is my little blorbo and she deserves everything ever.

i'll be honest i've been so eloquent and serious up until now but i don't actually know how to finish this post. maybe i will end it on a lighthearted note: if there's one thing i can't forgive it was getting blindsided by perfect circle, i had NO IDEA about this portion of the game, NONE of those assets were in the files during the literal months i was doing the scripting in. imagine my shock when i binged the game in one sitting and it smacked me in the face. i literally got fucking trolled.

i had a cookie cake for my birthday cake last year.

#i am on my period and got hit with insomnia and had a bad night last night #this is MY emotional support 3 am dump about twofold #twofold vn #twofold