pemcandenza

[pemcandenza]

sorry I kind of love horror where it’s just like. the evil mold did it

[pemcandenza]

when youre fighting someone in a 7/11 in tokyo and you hear him yell to the cashier "microwave his head"

[pemcandenza]

taking out a loan for a very beautiful wooden spoon

[pemcandenza]

pemulis and axford

One of the girls in my research group is doing something involving urine and glucose. Apparently it's $40 for 3 oz of synthetic urine. I was shocked and shouted YOU KNOW HOW MUCH REAL URINE YOU CAN GET FOR 40 BUCKS? I'm honestly surprised I didn't get kicked out of the meeting.

[pemcandenza]

[pemcandenza]

This is a headline on an actual news website.

#kate gompart

[pemcandenza]

Listen, buddy, I’m well acquainted with my food molds. I flirt with botulism every day of my life

[pemcandenza]

Dr. James O. Incandenza:

[pemcandenza]

get more out of life. read a fucked up book.

[pemcandenza]

these recipe blog preambles are getting out of hand

[pemcandenza]

[pemcandenza]

Our own internal microwave is connected to our spirituality by way of the solar plexus chakra. These energies are connected by way of the words “I AM.” All words come from spirit. We must say them at a pitch low enough to access our souls. They are special words, and should not be spoken above a pitch higher than A-440.

[pemcandenza]

my tumblrina mutuals fucking love skinning their knees. its like enrichment to them

[pemcandenza]

1910s guy who calls including left-handed characters in stories forced diversity

[pemcandenza]

10k notes post five years ago: i had a dream that mothman did cough syrup with me in a denny's parking lot and told me that liminal spaces are where we feel most at home

10k notes post now: girl balls are like two lighthouse keepers that form an inseparable bond and dash themselves on the rocks together at the thought of returning to land <3

10k notes post five years from now: who all remember boston 😭😭

[pemcandenza]

boston ma

[pemcandenza]

Just ate an entire pear that was so good and so juicy i started gnawing on it with both hands like an animal and the face my supervisor made when he passed by my desk while I was absolutely consumed by my pear fueled bacchanal was Something i have never seen someone look so tired and also so upset and also also so envious