I’m a Mess™
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Dead at the “lol you wild. Wyd though”
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Me: Not today, Satan
Satan: How about tomorrow?
Me: I can't I have work. Friday?
Satan: Yeah I can do Friday
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A lot of people ask me what my biggest fear is, or what scares me most. And I know they expect an answer like heights, or closed spaces, or people dressed like animals, but how do I tell them that when I was 17 I took a class called Relationships For Life and I learned that most people fall out of love for the same reasons they fell in it. That their lover’s once endearing stubbornness has now become refusal to compromise and their one track mind is now immaturity and their bad habits that you once adored is now money down the drain. Their spontaneity becomes reckless and irresponsible and their feet up on your dash is no longer sexy, just another distraction in your busy life.
Nothing saddens and scares me like the thought that I can become ugly to someone who once thought all the stars were in my eyes.
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shut up!!!!!!
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being friends with me is never boring.
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Let Him Have The Sausages
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The Signs As Songs Off A Fever You Can't Sweat Out
Aries: London Beckoned Songs About Money Written By Machines
Taurus: Lying Is The Most Fun A Girl Can Have Without Taking Her Clothes Off
Gemini: The Only Difference Between Martyrdom and Suicide Is Press Coverage
Cancer: Nails For Breakfast, Tacks For Snacks
Leo: There's A Good Reason These Tables Are Numbered, Honey You Just Haven't Thought Of It Yet
Virgo: Time To Dance
Libra: But It's Better If You Do
Scorpio: I Constantly Thank God For Esteban
Sagittarius: I Write Sins Not Tragedies
Capricorn: Camisado
Aquarius: Build God, Then We'll Talk
Pisces: Time To Dance
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“you’re not a real fan if-”
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when someone reblogs your selfie with no tags: What are you thinking? How are you feeling? What have we done to each other? What will we do?
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so I was watching The Powerpuff Girls and this happened
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I’m ashamed that I even had to type that sentence to be honest.
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“I feel tumblr people will be the best parents. Ever.”
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