radioisntdead

[radioisntdead]

Good evening folks I'm sleep deprived again and you know what that means! Deranged headcanons this time with almost everyone and not just Alastor, reader pops in and out, I lost my hazbin header and I don't feel like going to redownload it rn so I'll edit this tomorrow to add it in, probably, someone remind me.

I can't remember Sir Pentious being around stairs, did we see him go upstairs in the show?? Do the egg Bois carry him? Did he evolve and master the art of snake crawling up the stairs??

You think when he first died he kept faceplanting himself, like stairs were this dork's [affectionate] number one enemy, one wrong move and WAM, BAM, BOOOM Sir Pentious is injured, ouchy

Hear me out on the reader just picking him up bridal style to go upstairs, like the reader doesn't look that strong and then sir Pentious is struggling with stairs so they just 'YOINK'

Okay so Charlie scrapbooks right? Pretty sure that's canon or it's just become fanon enough that I can't remember the difference,

You and Charlie scrapbooking together, like just bonding, pop on some type of movie on the tv, make popcorn and other snacks and get a ton of crafting stuff for scrapbooking.

Vaggie gives off the vibe that she sleepwalks or talks in her sleep like from silly stuff like "gimme back my fruit gummies" to "He's watching you."

Also she has that type of sleepwalking that's just doing routines so you'll wake up to go downstairs and grab water or something and you just see Vaggie in her pajamas swinging her spear around,

You should promptly walk back up those stairs because you do NOT DUCK AROUND WITH ANGELIC WEAPONS.

No idea if Vaggie is still a moth with the whole fallen angel exorcist thing [I'm just imagining exorcists aren't all completely human looking just in grayscale, like imagine a exorcist that's like husk,] but like dangle a lamp Infront of her and it wows her for a few minutes giving you time to escape.

Speaking of husk, does he count as a furry? He does right? I'm imagining if you really really don't like furries and you go below you become a furry, but we saw some folks in heaven, do they get to choose to be furries? [Should clarify I have nothing against furries, Some of the nicest people I've met have been furries, you do you, I'm just wondering]

Do you think he goes to a doctor or a vet? [I don't think he goes to either, he has to be dragged there dude gives off the 'its fine' 'YOU HAVE A GIANT CYST IN YOUR ARM' 'its fine' vibes]

Speaking of animals Angel dust probably had a tough time learning to walk with his spider legs when he first died because they have that bendy bit right? I would fall on my face.

I imagine there's a bunch of learning when you just die and end up in eternal damnation like you get some type of features right?

You think Vox tapes stuff to his face? Like I saw this one fanart with him holding a rose in his teeth but like, he's a flat face TV screen I don't think he can hold that properly without the rose bending.

I'm bringing the hat gremlin reader into this and from my doodles Vox's hat has little spikey legs

They crack his screen, they're like a cat, meow meow

Same vibes you can't convince me otherwise.

Also Vox looks very biteable, munch munch

Alastor probably did this if Vox had a flat screen at a point in their past friendship.

I think I said it before but I have a whole plan to take out the Vee's if I ever got isekaied into hazbin, for all purposes if I got isekaied into hazbin I WOULD LIKE TO BE IN HEAVEN. I WOULD NOT WANT TO ENCOUNTER ALASTOR HE WOULD KILL ME [or I'd annoy him to death] I WOULD NOT BE SAFE

Anyways Angelic steel baseball bat, Vox has a screen, WAM BAM DEAD TV HEAD MAN

Valentino lure him in with a lamp, then angelic weapon and bug spray, 2 for 2

Or am angelic steel one of THESE

And all I'm gonna say for Velvette is horrible fashion, she'll explode from anger.

#radiorambles #hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel x you

[radioisntdead]

Me being sleep deprived is so fun, either I'm grumpy and picking half-arsed fights over things like hummus with my friends who know I'm sleepy grumpy, OR I'm pure Comedy, my filters gone and cursed things appear, and I'm easing in and out of consciousness

I haven't slept in I don't know how long but I wrote a lot yay, two requests done, and part two of too sweet is mostly done

#radiorambles

[radioisntdead]

Good evening my dearest readers!

I wanted to say in advance ELDRITCH HORROR READER'S BACKSTORY IS GONNA BE A WILD RIDE, I just finished fleshing it out [my poor best friend getting seven minutes of voice messages rambling about it] and now it's time to write, I put some hints in the Eldritch horror reader playlist

I haven't even written a proper part two yet and I'm already getting the backstory and everything, I need to write that first, nothing is really in order but I'm figuring it out

#radiorambles #Eldritch horror reader and the hat gremlin reader are my favorites rn if you can't tell #So much angst planned #there is a reason Eldritch horror reader doesn't remember much and there is a reason they are down below

[radioisntdead]

Just thought about this, but could I request a platonic ask with the Hazbin Crew (or just Charlie and Vaggie) with a frankenstein-esque sinner reader? Stitches all over their limbs, mismatched and it’s a common sight to see their limbs falling off their body and they only sigh before picking it back up?

They’re very nice, just tired and getting fed up/disgruntled with their own body and how it’s scarred, mismatched and always falling apart.

Good evening my dear! I wasn't too sure how to make this into a full oneshot so I made it into headcanons hopefully that's alright!

I actually have a OC very similar to this however she's a ragdoll so taking inspo from that

Hazbin hotel x gn! reader [platonic]

Warnings:

Limbs falling off, Alastor stealing arms

The first time they witnessed you lose a limb it freaked the majority of them out [Alastor only widened his grin because he's creepy like that]

The lot of you were just hanging out and doing a trust fall exercise and poor Sir Pentious was the one to catch you, he was not expecting your limb to just come straight off, like he was holding you and your arm was beside you on the floor.

And you just causally sighed and wiggled out of a panicking Sir Pentious's arms and grabbed your arm grumbling about having to sew it back on.

I imagine you may have to sometimes reinforce certain parts because sometimes you just go running and SNAP the stitches on your leg becomes undone and your face meets the ground.

There's a sewing kit almost anywhere in the hotel for you to use in emergencies,

Niffty is skilled with sewing so I imagine if you let her and don't mind getting stabbed a couple times she'd sew you right up in mere seconds, I imagine if you don't mind melding fabric to your skin she'll sew on fabrics with pretty patterns on, maybe it'll make you feel better about your loose limbs.

Angel dust LOVES coming up with nicknames for you, Frankie, Patches, Frankenstein's long lost child, patchwork, ragdoll etc etc

I'm gonna be honest Alastor probably tries to munch on your fallen limbs, I can see him grabbing your fallen arm and booking it out of there while you chase after him yelling for Vaggie to do something.

Vaggie gets your limbs back

Going off the fabrics if your okay with that going on your skin Charlie definitely buys some for you as a surprise, she'll ask Vaggie on whether or not she thinks you'd like a certain fabric patch.

I think having a bunch of patches gifted to you by loved ones is a nice thought, we adapt habits, traits, mannerisms etc etc from people we love and the people that love us sometimes adapt our habits, traits, mannerisms etc etc from us, we're a lovely mashup of ourselves and the people we love.

I imagine Sir Pentious would build something to help keep your limbs together, like a brace or a prosthetic covering of sorts?

Alastor gives you a patch and it's just arm themed, he probably steals your limbs like five times in a week,

"DAMN IT AL, THAT'S THE FIFTH TIME THIS WEEK STOP."

"no"

You have to get Vaggie to help you retrieve your limbs before Alastor makes your arm into an arm pot pie or something.

Husk would help you with carrying anything super heavy, particularly if it's alcohol because he is NOT risking your arms ripping off and no more drunky tipsy times [I can't legally drink I don't know how it works and I don't wanna know.]

Whenever Charlie asks for a hand and your arm has been detached you hand her your arm, freaks her out for a second before she's just like "Haha very funny please don't do that again"

Charlie definitely works on making sure your comfortable in the hotel, if you're ever insecure about your scars she'll take a pen or something and doodle around them.

Honestly Charlie probably thinks your mismatched patches look cool and you remind her of a plushie she had as a child,

If your filled with cotton like a plushie do expect hugs.

Good evening folks! I am making my way through requests! Plus the part two to Too sweet and Eldritch horror reader's backstory [EVIL LAUGHING] will be out soon!

#hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel x you #hazbin hotel

[radioisntdead]

GUESS WHO TOUCHED GRASS? ME

Time to write because I said I was posting today and I need to finish it

#radiorambles

[radioisntdead]

still ain’t sorry for starting the hat gremlin thawing

Valid, hat gremlin has taken over my blog

#radioasks

[radioisntdead]

Y'all have way too much confidence in me to NOT go for worse angst

That confidence may pay off

Hey did anyone want a part two to "Too sweet"?

Because you're getting one, is it going to have an happy ending or be worse?

Guess.

#radiorambles

[radioisntdead]

I remember ages ago my best friend choked on whipped cream and texted me that they thought they were going to die and my immediate reaction was to ask if they wanted to be CREAMated or not.

They did not like the joke, my mom did though, they were fine and they're alive and well, still my best friend.

Anyways I need to have Alastor make that pun now.

#radiorambles

[radioisntdead]

Causally dropping some hazbin OCS of mine for a fic that's been in the works since I started this blog

Please excuse my horrible handwriting!

Deyanira's a puppet themed overlord who wears a comedy/sorrow mask or a veil, and her younger sister Theodosia is a butterfly sinner who works in cannibal town, [she's also cannibal]

The duo died around the 2010's in a car crash with their younger sibling [which in the oneshot I'm writing is the reader]

If you're wondering why they look so different other then that they're in hell, they're adopted along with the reader. I love em' they're so funky

#radiorambles #hazbin hotel oc #hazbin hotel x reader

[radioisntdead]

Are your soup edits free to use? If so do you wish for credit?

Of course! Feel free to use em'! And I would prefer to be credited but you don't have too

#radioasks

[radioisntdead]

Alastor (watching Y/N from afar): Look at her. I would die for her. I would kill for her. Either way, what bliss!

[radioisntdead]

Working on requests again! One will hopefully be out by tomorrow! I got a DND campaign [my first time playing if anyone has any tips please gimme!] Tomorrow morning but after I'm gonna try to binge write [maybe 1-2 oneshots and then some headcanons is my goal] and that'll be Monday, tuesday and Wednesdays fics [?] Also I'm thinking of doing matchups? Just for like a week or so?

#radiorambles

[radioisntdead]

Your soup edits made me think; what Hazbin duo is most likely to reenact the iconic "At Soup" skit?

Adam and Lute, dude would 100% go shopping at a soup store

Also bonus Charlie because after I edited Adam I found her sad and I still had the soup background

I should not have access to PicsArt, also she's probably on the phone with Vaggie

#radiorambles #hazbin charlie #hazbin adam

[radioisntdead]

I'm cleaning out my phone so here are some hazbin soup edits

#radiorambles #hazbin hotel

[radioisntdead]

Ways to piss off an Italian

Alternatively three ways to cartoonishly piss off an Italian

Hazbin hotel x reader [Platonic]

Warnings:

Italian stereotypes, just jokin' around this is all in good fun! I put an Imp OC of mine in as the reader assistant! She just pops in and out to stir things up! Reader's learning to cook other types of food because they've hadn't had to cook for themselves in ages they just had others do it. Ending is a little off but we don't talk about that I finished this at 6 am I need sleep, Angel isn't that pissed mostly dismayed

Good evening folks! This is a side story with Eldritch horror reader and Angel dust because he's Italian, this is somewhat inspired by my own bit of how my younger self made it her mission to piss off Italians because of that Italian TikTok duo back in 2020-2021 [???] She did not succeed as she did not know any Italians and all she did was eat spaghetti noodles with anything but a fork.

this is also the 100 followers special! Now at the time of posting we are FAR past that at 207! but better late then never! Thank you so much for the support, I genuinely did not think this many folks would like my silly little writings, I adore getting y'all's requests, comments, and just appearing in my inbox genuinely it makes my day thank you! And I hope you enjoy!

Angel Dust took great pride in his Italian heritage and culture, as he was truly Italian.

Unfortunately he lived with a centuries old Eldritch horror who may or may not have lived in Europe during the bubonic plague and didn't understand the more "modern'' Italian or Italy at all, and others that didn't understand the "sacredness" of the Italians.

🍝The spaghetti.🍝

You took over cooking in the hotel, you and Alastor had begun fighting over the kitchen, whoever got there first got to cook and today, you were victorious.

You were exploring new recipes you had thus far made spicy tteokbokki and Korean corn dogs, some type of curry that was sonic blue, teriyaki chicken, hummus and other things! You experimented with different flavors, seasonings,

These tasty things would've ended you if you ate it back when you were alive and not dying of the bubonic plague.

Anyways, you decided to give making spaghetti a try because you were in the mood for something fairly easy to make.

As you perused the recipe book while humming along to the songs playing from Alastor's radio show, you nodded noting down the ingredients before pulling out the phone that the little Imp that worked for you had bought you insisting you should have one to contact her instead of hunting her down at random and dragging her away.

You squinted as you scrolled through the few contacts you had until you reached said imp's phone number and slowly texted her a barrage of ingredients to buy.

Cece carefully opened the hotel doors and skittered over to the kitchen, having memorized the route since she delivered ingredients to you almost daily at this point.

You grinned as you took the ingredients from Cece's hands turning around to place them on the counter while she pulled up a chair and sat down waiting for the inevitable "Dear Cece can you cut this" or "Dear Cece can you stir this"

You washed off the tomatoes before slicing in an x and blanching them, you peeled the tomatoes after and diced them up before putting them aside to cut up yellow onions, you gathered them up and placed them into a pan, sprinkling in salt to unleashed the onion liquids and sweetness.

You added in some prechopped garlic and let it saute.

While that was happening you took the tomatoes and crushed them, once done you combined the tomatoes with the rest letting it simmer.

You added other components like herbs, basil and a little olive old at the end just for fun.

You filled up another pot with water to boil, sprinkling a twinge of salt and stirring it in.

You brushed your hands on your apron, as you scooted around to find the box of spaghetti noodles, grinning you opened it and take out the pasta.

It was at this unfortunate moment Angel dust decided to waltz on into the kitchen, intending to see what was for dinner and maybe snag something to munch on, you held the dry pasta over the pot, both hands gripping the ends

"Hey tentacles, what's for- WHAT THE FUCK!''

"Good evening Dearest Angel! I'm making spaghetti!"

You said unfazed as the pasta snapped in half and dropped into the pot as Angel dust watched in pure horror.

"Why would you do that?!" Angel asked, his voice pitched as he asked arms gesturing to the pot of sad broken pasta boiling away.

"Make spaghetti? I didn't think it was such a controversial meal"

"No! You broke the pasta! That's like the biggest sin ya can do! What is wrong with ya?"

"We're already in hell, I don't think sins matter much here," Cece popped in, you jumped slightly forgetting the imp was there.

"They do when it comes to' fuckin' pasta toots!"

Angel dust shouted before promptly turning around and leaving the kitchen, leaving you completely confused and Cece amused, unfortunately her amusement turned into irritation as you asked her to grab the ground beef and roll it into balls so you could cook them because meatballs.

During dinner time your spaghetti was a hit!

Charlie complimented your cooking saying you outdid yourself while Vaggie was grabbing a second serving, Sir Pentious enjoyed slurping up the noodles, Niffty kept stabbing the meatballs foe whatever reason, Husk seemed to enjoy the meal however Angel dust had one pair of arms crossed while he reluctantly ate, it was good he could admit but he knew the sin that you had committed while cooking, he knew that innocent pasta had been broken.

Angel dust almost died a second time when he walked into the kitchen later that night for a midnight snack and witnessed a probably drunk Husk eating leftover spaghetti pasta with ketchup because the sauce you had made was on a higher shelf in the refrigerator and he didn't feel like climbing.

🍕 pineapple pizza time.🍕

You and Alastor had... For lack of better words got into a little fight over the kitchen, tentacles, shadows, mild mind control and other things were used until Vaggie stepped in and separated the two of you,

It was decided that pizza would be ordered for the hotel, much to Alastor's disapproval.

Cheese, pepperoni, pineapple and ham, and supreme were the pizzas ordered unbeknownst to Angel dust since he was coming back to the hotel from a hangout with Cherri.

"Angel! Welcome back we ordered pizza!" Charlie said waving the spider over as Vaggie placed the pizza boxes onto the table.

"Great! I'm starvin'!" Angel walked over just in time to see the box containing pineapple pizza opened up.

"Nevermind I'll starve."

"We have other pizzas Angel."

Vaggie did not get paid enough to deal with this, she didn't even get paid!

Angel dust was extremely disappointed in you, you were the one to suggest getting pineapple pizza because you quote, "Never had it before and wanted to try it",

You were well over a few centuries old, you weren't a child, you had gone to hell and become an overlord that rained terror for a couple of years and therefore you should've been able to tell that pineapple on pizza was a crime against humanity, so what if pizza wasn't a thing during your time, it was a thing that came to be while you were down here!

He had later lectured you about it, it was amusing to you! You were a feared overlord and yet this little Italian guy had the gull to lecture you, this was normal in families right? To not be afraid of each other? How wonderful!

The lecture eventually switched over to Husk who was eating pizzas folded which was just weird because he was just tasting the crust! What about the cheese? The sauce? THE SAUCE HUSK? DO YOU NOT TASTE IT?

Husk was too sober for the lecture, Alastor found it amusing though.

🇮🇹Italian PowerPoint presentation 🇮🇹

"Alright tentacles, we're havin' a intervention!" Angel dust said throwing his hands down on the coffee table as you sipped something from a teacup, probably tea.

"Is what you dragged us here for? This shit?"

Husk was here, how did he always get dragged into these things? Niffty was beside him trying to stab a roach, Charlie and Vaggie were out of the hotel, Alastor was hell knew where, probably doing radio stuff and Angel dust had somehow tracked down your assistant and dragged her there.

"Oh! Whatever for dearie?" You asked head tilted as you placed your cup on the table,

"You've committed so many fuckin' crimes in the past week! Ya' broke the pasta before puttin' it in the pot! Ya' put cream in the carbonara! Ya ate pineapple on pizza, I get we're in hell but are ya fuckin' kiddin' me?-" Angel moved his arms around to empathize his point "Not to mention that little fusion stunt, ya' deranged octopus!"

You hummed thinking about the meals you've made recently before responding, "I don't think I made anything bad?"

"You decided to put tomato sauce, cheese and pepperoni on cooked ramen and stuck it in da' oven and ate it."

"It wasn't as good as the little people on the interwebs said."

"OF COURSE IT WASN'T GOOD IT WAS A CRIME! IT CAME OUT OF THE DEEPS OF HELL."

"Eh, it wasn't that bad" Cece popped in to stir the pot, Angel slowly turned around becoming slightly more spidery

"The fuck did ya just say?"

Cece shrugged, "Food's expensive and I need to eat."

Cece was picked up and thrown on the couch with you as Angel dust set up a PowerPoint presentation about the history of Italian food and whatever else, You did not want to be here you'd rather be drinking your drink in peace, Husk didn't want to be here he'd rather be drinking, your hellborn imp assistant didn't want to be here, she's never going to Italy she didn't need to know this and Niffty, well she's still stabbing things on the floor.

By the time Charlie and Vaggie returned you had zoned out completely and your mind was elsewhere, Niffty was napping on your shoulder, Cece had escaped by asking Angel if garlic bread was Italian and while he went on that tangent she ran out abandoning everyone.

Husk was more dead inside then per usual, he wasn't paid enough for this, the first hour was fine but this had been going on for five hours at this point, how did Angel dust manage to drag this PowerPoint presentation out so long?

Vaggie shut it down after it was realized that you weren't responding and they thought you had somehow died,

You did not die and you eventually snapped out of it when a white cloth was put over you in order to hide the body.

Good evening folks! Thank you for turning on in! I hope you enjoyed, my apologies for taking forever to get this out, if your wondering why it feels like there's a missing gap that's because I wrote a whole lil' thing of reader and Alastor combining forces to annoy Angel and I accidentally deleted it.

I'm gonna rewrite it eventually and add it to a different fic with Eldritch horror reader, also If your wondering why I have an imp OC in here there is a reason with Eldritch horror and their family complex you'll see eventually

I'll be getting the readers backstory which will be the 200 follower special out [hopefully] soon so tune on in for that! Thank you again have a wonderful day!

#hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel x you #angel dust & reader #angel dust x reader #hazbin x reader #hazbin x you

[radioisntdead]

Hey did anyone want a part two to "Too sweet"?

Because you're getting one, is it going to have an happy ending or be worse?

Guess.

[radioisntdead]

THE ITALIAN FIC IS ALMOST DONE, FINALLY.

Today I learned I write better with just music playing!

#radiorambles