rashamon

[rashamon]

@burntgod << muses moved here! new disc is MARS! 🐑#9279

[rashamon]

OK BSD RP THAT’s STILL ALIVE WHO GONNA BE MY FRIEND ON TALES OF THE LOST

#yes i finally got it #yes i like lookin at my lil guys #doin their lil guy things #i have one dazai ssr and im set for life #now if i can just get a CHUUYA SSR….. #give me ur code so i can invite u teehee #ooc /

[rashamon]

“Careful with your words, Professor glasses…”

[rashamon]

#wife WIFE WIFE WIFE #FUND MY WIFE PLS

[rashamon]

‘   ⸻   it’s called paella,   dear.   i haven’t made it in a while,   and it seemed i’d be spending the night in,   so   …   would you like to try it ?   ’

“  yes. of fucking course. who do i look like to you, robin?  i’m starving.  ”  he forgets himself for just a second.  “  oh, right - please.  ”

#aneitei #aneitei : robin. #be careful of his grubby lil mooch hands #love language: stealing without remorse. #JHKDFJHKSDJH

[rashamon]

“  i’d rather fish every sturgeon from the sea than lift a finger to help you,  ”  he speaks spitefully, the brashness of his tone originating from one place entirely. the perceived betrayal at high noon when chuuya had almost destroyed japan ( again ) and this slimy bastard started the fight before leaving him for dead. chuuya rarely forgives, and he never forgets. either way, the harbinger of the void makes him uneasy and equally skeptical about whatever motives he might have working with the port mafia. 

for @tajukon​.

#tajukon #tajukon : kuhaku. #muse / nakahara chuuya.

[rashamon]

“  keep squirming and imma kick you out,  ”  chuuya grumbles quietly near dazai’s ear, or what he thinks might be dazai’s ear, he can’t be too sure without actually opening his eyes which happens to be a nonstarter. arms coddling a torso tighten around the shifting creature to stop him from moving, the comforter slung over most of chuuya’s body slides to the side unhelpfully. he groans and moves to throw it back over the both of them before returning to muffling his slow breaths against dazai’s spine and the shirt chuuya had let him borrow the night before. 

for @tajukon.

#tajukon #tajukon : dazai. #muse / nakahara chuuya. #i told u so

[rashamon]

he knows dazai is trying to scare him away. he knows enough about his partner at this point to understand that’s what he’s doing. it’s easier to keep people at arm’s length; it hurt less when you lose them. he knew that all too well. kunikida had allowed his heart to get broken over and over again. he couldn’t blame dazai for trying to avoid that feeling. still, he won’t let it won’t. 

‘ then it kills me. ‘ he shrugs, standing up and turning back to the kitchen. clearly, dazai is not going to cooperate. that’s fine. he starts gathering ingredients to make dazai a filling meal. he’ll cook it and leave him alone. 

‘ i don’t care what you say. you’re not going to change my mind. so just give it up. you’re wasting your own energy. ‘ 

a terribly easy answer for a complicated question, dazai should have expected such deliverance but perhaps the flippancy surprises him. he can still feel death’s cold breath down his neck, it doesn’t falter for a second, only follows him into the bleak future. it’s safe to say he hates it here, despises the god that cursed him to live on this rock. not much has changed that over the years. maybe music, maybe sex, but it’s all finite and fleeting, like the life he actively tries to throw away. sinking into pity like tar in a pit, the more he struggles against it, the harder it drags him down. 

ideals, ideals, ideals; why doesn’t he have any of his own?   “  why did you become a detective, kunikida-kun?  ”  dazai asks within a mumble, giving up his tirade against his new partner’s rock solid head.  “  i could guess, sure, but i want to hear your reasoning. why did you choose this? all risk and no reward?  ”

#jikangai #jikangai : kunikida. #muse / dazai osamu.

[rashamon]

fate has a way of commanding the hand,  it can only be fought for so long before it takes the lead, without so much as a thought to who it might be hurting. chaos has never been friendly, rather unmistakably cruel. nakahara chuuya knows it well, can feel the bracers around his wrists that bind him to these flaws of humanity. if only there was more he could have done. if only he was stronger.  “  if you can’t learn to forgive yourself for your failures you risk succumbing to them. you can’t live life without mistakes, unfortunately, but it’s good enough to learn from them. you’re not a god. you shouldn’t carry that weight around when it’ll only cripple you.  ”

continued from x. for @jikangai​.

#jikangai #jikangai : kunikida. #muse / nakahara chuuya. #this been sitting in my drafts 4 way 2 fuckin long

[rashamon]

“  there’s no songs for people like us, maybe you - maybe johnny cash or some other depressed fuck, but it’s not some kind of romantic ballad. it’s just fucking sad, like your life.  ”  perhaps he’s feeling disillusioned the older he gets. creating this bitterness spilling from every pore and crevice. the clearer the above world becomes the more he realizes he was born into the below. this isn’t life, it’s misfortune. depending on how you define it. 

chuuya couldn’t really delude himself, all the glamour of crime couldn’t justify the stress it takes just to survive. it’s exhausting, he’s been fatigued for years now but nothing ever changes. not even dazai, who sheds skin just for fun. chuuya thinks he’s probably seen every shade by now and it’s the only comfort he knows around dazai. learning to expect the unexpected and accepting whatever that means in the moment.

for @parieha​.

#parieha #parieha : dazai. #muse / nakahara chuuya. #ambiguous starters r my forte

[rashamon]

YOUR LUNGS BURN WITH EVERY BREATH YOU TAKE  ━  this is the kind of future that awaits you out there.  headcanon based & written by mars.

#im sexy and so are my boys #theyre all mean and gay #sign up today #sp /

[rashamon]

atsushi definitely has a Polaroid camera

#baby

[rashamon]

not me thinking about how despite being afraid of new connections that could be used against him, chuuya is extremely sentimental and longs for connection to others

#looks at his hat and his motorcycle #starts sobbing uncontrollably #get u a man who is so afraid of loved ones dying because of him that he just stops having loved ones #but also cant stop bc some parasites (dazai) stick around #he thinks he needs to be alone so he doesnt hurt anyone passively but like baby boyyyyyy #you deserve to be LOVED #anyways im sad and i love chuuya #ooc /

[rashamon]

“  oi oi oi, what do you have and why aren’cha sharing, bird brains?  ”

@aneitei​.

#muse / nakahara chuuya. #aneitei #aneitei : robin. #bats eyelashes #share w ur executive thats an order

[rashamon]

✨HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHUUYAAAAAAA~ ✨

We love you, you beautiful badass 🥺

#there is no other man for me but nakahara chuuya #everyone else? dont know em

[rashamon]

an inevitable demise [½]

[rashamon]

a brief primer for the hopeless days, part 2:

Rabindranath Tagore, Stray Birds (167) | Bertolt Brecht, ‘Motto’ | Anne Lamott, Bird by Bird  | Gregory Orr, Concerning the Book of the Body That Is the Beloved | Leonard Cohen, ‘Chelsea Hotel No. 2′