sapient-locations-bracket

[sapient-locations-bracket]

*clanking pots and pans* New bracket! I'm running a new bracket! Submit entries to the new bracket here!

Is your character:

Real?

Organic?

Capable of fitting through a doorway?

From a text-, video-, toy-, or musical-based medium?

If you answered "No" to all four questions, then your character may be eligible for the Best Fiction Podcast AI Bracket coming soon* to sexiestpodcastcharacter.tumblr.com!

There will be preliminaries for any podcast with more than two AIs submitted! Plus any other adjustments necessary** for us to start with a nice even power of two.

*By "soon" I mean May because I'm supposed to be getting ready for a trip now, going on said trip at the beginning of April, and working overtime at the end of April. But we will see where my self-control takes me.

**Usually characters that are from primarily video streaming mediums, such as Critical Role or Dimension 20, are not allowed in my brackets, but if it will make the number of submissions a natural power of two I may allow them, just this once.

No pressure to reblog, but these tournaments inspired this one! @tournament-announcer (okay this one isn't a tournament), @cpu-gpu-smackdown, @killerrobot-killingmatch, @mattapparentlystumbltourneys, @sapient-locations-bracket, @the-robot-bracket, @best-bot-tournament-2023, @roboswagbracket, @robo-swag, @robot-swag-competition, @fuckablerobotbracket, and honestly probably some other ones. What can I say? I love robots!***

***Robots that are more likely to be classified as "robots" than "AI", such as my beloveds AuDy, Thisbe, LEO(h), and even precious Boots who can probably not fit through doorways, are not currently eligible.

Generative AI fans and advocates do not interact! This poll is for fictional characters written and performed with intent only!

[sapient-locations-bracket]

HAUNTED HOUSE BRACKET

I think I'm gonna do a Haunted House bracket at some point, it's too fun a concept to NOT do. My first thoughts are:

Hill House (Shirley Jackson)

Monster House (2006 animated film)

House on Ash Tree Lane (House of Leaves)

The Overlook (The Shining/Stephen King)

Anatomy House (Kittyhorrorshow)

Opal's House (Jack Stauber)

Castle Dracula (Bram Stoker)

HAUSU (1977 film)

Horrorstor (Grady Hendrix)

The Evil Dead Cabin (1981 film)

Am I missing anything obvious? It'll be a bit before I can set this up but I simply MUST

[sapient-locations-bracket]

if the two people who submitted Breq/Justice of Toren and/or those who submitted the others from that series are still here, I have begun reading the first book and I love Breq already and relate far too much to her issues with facial expressions

[sapient-locations-bracket]

Hera would distress the fuck out of Perihelion i think

Hera: hey did you ever run simulations where you killed your entire crew just to feel like you had some control over your situation?

ART, who couldn't even handle fictional crewmates dying in a show: what the fuck

#in celebration of our final 2

[sapient-locations-bracket]

Our tournament has concluded with ART from the Murderbot Diaries just barely beating Hera from Wolf 359 by a whopping 1.2 percent.

that was a killer matchup that was totally up in the air and honestly both contestants did amazing

congrats to ART, and thanks to all my followers who stuck with it and helped this happen. This has been so much fun

#sapient locations bracket #announcement

[sapient-locations-bracket]

FINAL MATCH

Descriptions:

ART (it/its, Murderbot diaries): “an AI downloaded onto a research transport! it has very big guns that it excuses as "defense". it is VIOLENTLY protective of those it considers its friends and families, ART accidentally scared the shit out of murderbot on their first meeting with its massive presence in the digital feed. it once threatened to blow up a entire planet if they didn't give murderbot back! ART is very close to becoming a evil ai and we love it for it” and “a sapient spaceship that was, on paper, created for deep space research by the Pansystem University of Mihira and New Tideland. However, most of its time is spent aiding the university in gathering intelligence about corporate crimes against humanity and running espionage. It loves its human crew and sees them as its family, though it often comes across as a bit of an asshole due to its dry sense of humor. would probably call itself a poor little meow meow”

Hera (she/her, Wolf 359): she's sassy, she's passive aggressive, she's only a little (a lot) glitchy, she's totally not ever tried to get around her programing to see if she could kill her crew! She's very trans-coded, very much disabled-coded, and she canonically has an AI anxiety disorder stemming from repressed parental abuse.” And “Look. Hera is the AI mother program of the USS Hephaestus but like. she is the station, it is her body, her eyes ears and mind, and I love her so much please please please

#polls #sapient locations bracket

[sapient-locations-bracket]

Round 4 Poll #2

Descriptions:

The Tardis (she/it, Doctor Who): time-travelling spaceship with basically infinite rooms stolen from a museum by the Doctor, an immortal time-travelling alien! (TARDIS is an acronym meaning 'Time and Relative Dimension in Space') Canonically TARDISes are grown and alive. The Doctor's TARDIS in particular will sometimes actively make decisions and shows preferences on her shape, locations, companions, etc. It also inhabited the body of a human woman one time, which was wild

ART (it/its, Murderbot diaries): “an AI downloaded onto a research transport! it has very big guns that it excuses as "defense". it is VIOLENTLY protective of those it considers its friends and families, ART accidentally scared the shit out of murderbot on their first meeting with its massive presence in the digital feed. it once threatened to blow up a entire planet if they didn't give murderbot back! ART is very close to becoming a evil ai and we love it for it” and “a sapient spaceship that was, on paper, created for deep space research by the Pansystem University of Mihira and New Tideland. However, most of its time is spent aiding the university in gathering intelligence about corporate crimes against humanity and running espionage. It loves its human crew and sees them as its family, though it often comes across as a bit of an asshole due to its dry sense of humor. would probably call itself a poor little meow meow”

#sapient locations bracket #polls

[sapient-locations-bracket]

Round 4 Poll #1

Descriptions:

Eskew (I Am in Eskew): It's a city but no it's not but it so wants to be a real city that it will do anything to convince you except it's totally monstrous and it loves you and living there is nothing but misery and torment but eskew is a city of wonders too and it's everything you've feared but that means you were right all along in some way and you can never really leave without abandoning yourself except you can if you really really have a reason and and . mental illness capital of this world and the next is what I'm saying. utterly sublime in the gothic horror sense

Hera (she/her, Wolf 359): she's sassy, she's passive aggressive, she's only a little (a lot) glitchy, she's totally not ever tried to get around her programing to see if she could kill her crew! She's very trans-coded, very much disabled-coded, and she canonically has an AI anxiety disorder stemming from repressed parental abuse.” And “Look. Hera is the AI mother program of the USS Hephaestus but like. she is the station, it is her body, her eyes ears and mind, and I love her so much please please please

#polls #sapient locations bracket

[sapient-locations-bracket]

That's a wrap on round 3! We're getting into more contentious matches between very popular characters and things have already gone in different ways than I expected. We've now got our final four:

Eskew

Hera

The Tardis

and ART

Who's going to make it to the end???

#sapient locations bracket #announcement

[sapient-locations-bracket]

Round 3 Poll #4

Descriptions:

Aperture Laboratories (She/her, he/him, Portal): In Portal 2, this is demonstrated most obviously in "The Cold Boot" and "The Itch", both times where GLaDOS is actively watching the destruction of 'her' facility. You watch both central cores move panels, testing elements, and even whole test chambers/testing tracks around in real time. Wheatley will refer to the neurotoxin/turrets as Her neutotoxin and Her turrets specifically, which is a bit of a throwaway line, but I like the casual reminder that the whole facility is an extension of GLaDOS. In Portal 1, this is most obviously demonstrated during the escape sequence. GLaDOS will say something along the lines of: "I know you're here. I can feel you there," which was creepy as hell to hear in the moment. She generally seems a lot more connected to the facility in that game, honestly. While there is indeed a line of seperation between the central core and their facility, I personally am going to assume it a failing on Valve's part to not take the ability to make the massive, sprawling facility that they can move around on command, down to the exact positioning of the panels on the walls, an extension of their body.

ART (it/its, Murderbot diaries): “an AI downloaded onto a research transport! it has very big guns that it excuses as "defense". it is VIOLENTLY protective of those it considers its friends and families, ART accidentally scared the shit out of murderbot on their first meeting with its massive presence in the digital feed. it once threatened to blow up a entire planet if they didn't give murderbot back! ART is very close to becoming a evil ai and we love it for it” and “a sapient spaceship that was, on paper, created for deep space research by the Pansystem University of Mihira and New Tideland. However, most of its time is spent aiding the university in gathering intelligence about corporate crimes against humanity and running espionage. It loves its human crew and sees them as its family, though it often comes across as a bit of an asshole due to its dry sense of humor. would probably call itself a poor little meow meow”

#polls #sapient locations bracket

[sapient-locations-bracket]

Round 3 Poll #3

Descriptions:

Hera (she/her, Wolf 359): she's sassy, she's passive aggressive, she's only a little (a lot) glitchy, she's totally not ever tried to get around her programing to see if she could kill her crew! She's very trans-coded, very much disabled-coded, and she canonically has an AI anxiety disorder stemming from repressed parental abuse.” And “Look. Hera is the AI mother program of the USS Hephaestus but like. she is the station, it is her body, her eyes ears and mind, and I love her so much please please please

Hill House (It/Its, Haunting of Hill House): It can cause intense hallucinations and has been known to drive people to delusion to the extent that they would rather die than be parted from It. it rips apart families in all forms, but in Mike Flanagan's Netflix adaptation of the story, it actually eats them alive and uses them as bait for its next victims. It has several ghostly inhabitants, but this is not the root of its evil - it is evil because it wants to be, and goddamn is it good at it.

#sapient locations bracket #polls

[sapient-locations-bracket]

Round 3 Poll #2

Descriptions:

The Tardis (she/it, Doctor Who): time-travelling spaceship with basically infinite rooms stolen from a museum by the Doctor, an immortal time-travelling alien! (TARDIS is an acronym meaning 'Time and Relative Dimension in Space') Canonically TARDISes are grown and alive. The Doctor's TARDIS in particular will sometimes actively make decisions and shows preferences on her shape, locations, companions, etc. It also inhabited the body of a human woman one time, which was wild

Aurora (she/her, The Mechanisms): She used to be a moon but then an immortal vampire named Carmilla killed her mother and then became her adopted mother. Then she got kidnapped and turned into a spaceship by Sprussia (Space Russia) then Carmilla's immortal cannibalistic but not vampire son stole her (back?) and Carmilla, Jonny (the son), and Nastya (freshly immortal. Used to be Anastasia) started living on her. Nastya, due to her world implanting people with essentially technological communication devices could talk to Aurora and they were lesbians together. Then Nastya went Out permanently because the Aurora got ship of Theseus'ed after so long and Nastya thought of Aurora now as a completely different person from Aurora then, who to Nastya was functionally dead. The Aurora then housed and transported the rest of the Mechanisms until their eventual deaths.

#polls #sapient locations bracket

[sapient-locations-bracket]

Round 3 Poll #1

Descriptions:

The Distortion (he/it or she/her, The Magnus Archives): an evil hallway pocket dimension that wears a human as its face and is but also really really isn't that person at all and uses that face to lure people into the hallways where it slowly drives them to madness while feasting on their fear. Bowling alley carpet core, one of its human forms is fandom-nicknamed fuck-hands mcmike

Eskew (I Am in Eskew): It's a city but no it's not but it so wants to be a real city that it will do anything to convince you except it's totally monstrous and it loves you and living there is nothing but misery and torment but eskew is a city of wonders too and it's everything you've feared but that means you were right all along in some way and you can never really leave without abandoning yourself except you can if you really really have a reason and and . mental illness capital of this world and the next is what I'm saying. utterly sublime in the gothic horror sense

#polls #sapient locations bracket

[sapient-locations-bracket]

Alright, this round had some seriously close matches! Things are heating up, but I'm happy to announce our winners as:

The Distortion

Eskew

The Tardis

Aurora

Hera

Hill House

Aperture Labs

ART

Congrats! Next round will be up shortly!

#announcement #sapient locations bracket

[sapient-locations-bracket]

ONLY A FEW MINUTES LEFT, can we break this tie????

Round 1 Poll #7

Descriptions:

Aperture Laboratories (She/her, he/him, Portal): In Portal 2, this is demonstrated most obviously in "The Cold Boot" and "The Itch", both times where GLaDOS is actively watching the destruction of 'her' facility. You watch both central cores move panels, testing elements, and even whole test chambers/testing tracks around in real time. Wheatley will refer to the neurotoxin/turrets as Her neutotoxin and Her turrets specifically, which is a bit of a throwaway line, but I like the casual reminder that the whole facility is an extension of GLaDOS. In Portal 1, this is most obviously demonstrated during the escape sequence. GLaDOS will say something along the lines of: "I know you're here. I can feel you there," which was creepy as hell to hear in the moment. She generally seems a lot more connected to the facility in that game, honestly. While there is indeed a line of seperation between the central core and their facility, I personally am going to assume it a failing on Valve's part to not take the ability to make the massive, sprawling facility that they can move around on command, down to the exact positioning of the panels on the walls, an extension of their body.

HAL 9000 (he/him, 2001 a Space Odyssey): he basically is the discovery though he wasn't created specifically to operate it. no crew are required to keep it running as long as he's there and it required significantly more maintenance/deteriorates noticeably when he's deactivated, notably (in 2010, the sequel) smelling like "something died in there". it's just rotting food but the relation between hal and the discovery is very there and imo isnt explored enough. also obligatory announcement that you should read the odyssey books and that hal did nothing wrong ever in any of his three lives. and he's gay btw

#polls #sapient locations bracket

[sapient-locations-bracket]

Welcome to the Epic Song Lyrics Showdown!

General Information:

Is there a song lyric that fucks you up? That you can never get out of your head? That you have complex thoughts about daily? Then this is for you.

If it’s not a lyric, no worries. You can also submit cool instrumental bits, cool vocals, basically anything cool that happens only for a bit in a song.

So how much can we submit?

You can submit as many songs as you want, also as many lyrics from a song as you want. We will have multiple lyrics from the same song in the showdown probably. (The exception to this would be possibly some consolidation or maybe some elimination rounds for equity, but it’s not limited to just one lyric). In terms of length, basically don’t just submit the whole song, otherwise you’re good. As an example: the 35 ‘Know it’s for the better’ in Waiting Room by Phoebe Bridgers, that’s fine. As long as it’s not the whole song we don’t care.

How long will submissions be open?

We’re not totally sure. In our other showdowns we’ve run we’ve had submissions open for months, but we don’t think that’s gonna happen here. We will probably run at least a 128, but are willing to get as big as we need to. There will be at least 24 hour notice before we close submissions.

What can’t be entered?

There’s not anything specific that can’t be entered, just know we do reserve the right to just not include some submissions. As we will not be publishing a list of song lyrics that have been entered until right before we get the showdown started, if you want to know if your song/lyric got in, shoot us an ask.

How to submit song lyrics:

There is a google form linked. If you don’t want to use the google form you can shoot us an ask with the song, artist, lyric, where it can be found, and why you like it if you want.

[sapient-locations-bracket]

I have also recently created a wolf 359 sideblog by the way, it’s at @harpoonsandmusicals