shxyme
she is the light ;
Some people are just born with tragedy in their blood. Shay Strickland
Indie OC
335 posts
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@prodigiumamare asked:
"Once you’re in Hell, only the Devil can help you out." - lucifer
there's a soft smirk to her lips when she looks up at him. ' well, maybe if i talk to him he'd help me more than God has. my prayers always felt like i was getting left on read. ' there's a small chuckle, she isn't sure if he'll understand what she means. instead she points to the small altar kept behind her bookstores counter. a green candle in the middle, surrounded by the fresh flowers. acorns. a set of antlers and a bowl of cherries sit on a small table in the corner. ' i found other Gods that don't require so much to be loved. Blind devotion has never been my thing..perhaps that's why the devil never scared me "
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the snarl on his face isn't anything unusual now. it's almost permanently etched onto jax's features now. she can't remember the last time she saw a genuine smile. there's the smirk in her words too however. the kind, caring shay had disappeared when they closed that casket on opie. and she wasn't sure that version of her would ever come back. ope had been a light in her life. and now, it'd never be lit again.
' maybe not the coke, but i figure if i smoke a joint too and drink the rest of the vodka in the cabinet, that might be enough for it to not hurt anymore. ' it's a cheap shot at him. a reminder that she's trying just about whatever vice she can to keep herself numb.
instead she moves away to pick up the table. keep her cool. when shays good, she's the mediator. she's the friendly one. she keeps the club from killing each other. when she's angry, depressed, bad off--her father comes out in her. the anger, the alcohol. the cutting words. and she knows now, if he gets too close, she's too unstable to stop herself. ' could have left the fuckin' table alone. now i have to vacuum this shit up before abel gets home from gemma's. '
sitting the table up, shay takes the time to look jax in the eyes. big brown orbs, pupils blown wide. ' it was never gonna be you jax. everyone has to protect samcro's prince. even if that means they don't come home. one of these days you're gonna run out of knights--and you're gonna be the last one standing. seems pretty damn lonely to me. '
@shxyme hates me but it's fine i'm fine
𝙻𝙸𝙺𝙴 𝚈𝙾𝚄 𝙲𝙰𝚁𝙴𝙳 𝙰𝙱𝙾𝚄𝚃 𝙾𝙿𝙴?
the air is knocked out of his lungs, stomach in knots & she may as well stick a knife in his heart & twist it with the way she glares at him. he doesn't blame her for hating him, [ 𝚑𝚎 𝚑𝚊𝚝𝚎𝚜 𝚑𝚒𝚖𝚜𝚎𝚕𝚏 𝚖𝚘𝚛𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚗 𝚜𝚑𝚎 𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚌𝚘𝚞𝚕𝚍 ] & his world is CRASHING, TUMBLING DOWN . . . he can't seem to stop it. ice floods his veins until he's NUMB, broken blue eyes staring straight through her; it's his fault. all his fault. ope is gone & no amount of bloodshed & vengeance will bring him back & how are they supposed to LIVE without their best friend, the love of their life? HE CAN'T FUCKING BREATHE.
❛ 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤 𝐢 𝐟𝐮𝐜𝐤𝐢𝐧' 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬?! ❜ she DIDN'T UNDERSTAND — the way jax fought so hard to be the one to take his place, how it should've been HIM getting his skull bashed in & yet . . . when ope made up his mind there was no changing it. ❛ 𝐢 𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐧𝐞 ————— ❜ the words get caught in his throat, fingers tangling in messy blond hair & ripping at the strands. & then the coffee table is shoved across the room, white powder spilling onto the carpet. RAGE is an emotion he knows how to feel & knows it well [ 𝚝𝚘𝚘 𝚠𝚎𝚕𝚕 𝚊𝚜 𝚑𝚎 𝚐𝚎𝚝𝚜 𝚞𝚙 𝚒𝚗 𝚜𝚑𝚊𝚢'𝚜 𝚏𝚊𝚌𝚎, 𝚊𝚕𝚖𝚘𝚜𝚝 𝚝𝚎𝚖𝚙𝚝𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚑𝚎𝚛 𝚝𝚘 𝚍𝚘 𝚜𝚘𝚖𝚎𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚊𝚋𝚘𝚞𝚝 𝚒𝚝 ]. ❛ 𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐢𝐧' 𝐜𝐨𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐮𝐩 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐧𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐚𝐢𝐧'𝐭 𝐠𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐚 𝐛𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐡𝐢𝐦 𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤, 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰. ❜
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suffering from a condition called remembering too much and loving too much and caring too much and
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Hi if u get followed by me and I was already following u, I swear? Tumblr unfollowed like three people, or I hit a wrong button or some shit so plz ignore that thank u
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@eat3rs continued from here
her eyes shift from him to the blood. and she has to resist the urge to drawn in another smell. to take her nose and move it closer to the blood on his cheek. to lick it off. to see if it still tastes as good as it does warm. but she doubts.she doesn't want to waste her appetite. so she flexes her fingers, focuses on the movement of joints. she doesn't trust herself with the pulse that flares under dakota's skin being that close to her fangs. not when the blood is muddling her good sense.
' i don't mind helping. my first few feeds didn't end as clean as i thought they would. the thirst takes over if you aren't careful. blood ends up everywhere. ' she moves to the bathroom, producing bleach and some old rags. ' let me get a little water..this guy have anyone at home waiting for him? ' a little tip of her head to the men's jeans left laying on the floor. she asks to make sure, just to check. she knows dakota wouldn't be stupid, but she's curious too.
mop bucket is returned with warm water, and her hands make quick work of pouring some bleach. two rags are handed to elliot. ' circular motions, when were done i'll work on your clothes if you wanna keep those. if not, we can just burn them. ' the circles her hands make take over her focus. rag working to get the blood out of the grooves of the tile flooring. what a waste, she thinks to herself. all of this blood she can't use. but then again, she wouldn't have an issue finding her own supply later.
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sorry i disappeared for a few days; come to find out, i was sick due to a uti putting me on the verge of sepsis, and a 3 cm ovarian cyst that decided it should cause some issues. ( something as small as a grape is kicking my ass ugh )
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I’m sick af, stomach virus. Give me a day or two and I’ll be back
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@shortfell asked:
nothing is ever as sinister as you think. ( edward )
the soft voice to her right broke her thoughts in half. who had..oh, wasn’t his name edward. she’d only moved to forks two months ago, and frankly she spent most of her time in forks at the library. voraciously trying to read through the harvard recommended reading list. but the library was small, and she was going to have to go to seattle to get the other books it seemed. she could make a day of it however. it was a big city though, and what if she got lost. that’s what her worrisome mother would think about. she always worried shay would get hurt, or worse, kidnapped. maybe that was because her mother was a nurse and had seen so many injuries. that’s what she’d been thinking to herself when the others voice drew her from her thoughts. almost..as if he somehow knew. now that she thought of it, shay was sure she’d never said a single word to edward. nor him to her. funny he’d chosen today to do so. maybe she had just seemed distracted and he took that opportunity to be social.
“ i believe people are inherently good. i can’t say everyone thinks that way though. guess watching the news can make you believe a lot of people are bad. ” she smiled, reminding herself that it wouldn’t kill her to talk to someone in her class.
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@shortfell asked:
"The truth will set you free." ( dr. crane )
she couldn’t tell if he knew something he shouldn’t. or if this was just the doctors personality showing itself. inviting everyone to these wayne enterprise soirees was the best for business. and no one could say she had bad blood with anyone if everyone was invited. but she’d always found crane a bit..odd. shay, however, couldn’t bring herself to outcast anyone. perhaps from her own fears of judgement. but what exactly could the doctor be meaning. did he know that she hid a second life? no. there wasn’t a way he could. she was simply being paranoid. crane was a man of psychology. of course he was interested in what secrets people could be holding in their hearts. or maybe, their heads. that was all. that had to be all.
“ i supposed i could say i believe the same, doctor crane. what truths can you share? ” good idea, she could focus on him. draw the attention away from her own secrets.
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Madison Mclaughlin
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ᴡʜʏ ᴅᴏᴇꜱ ᴛʀᴀɢᴇᴅʏ ᴇxɪꜱᴛ?
ʙᴇᴄᴀᴜꜱᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀʀᴇ ꜰᴜʟʟ ᴏꜰ ʀᴀɢᴇ.
ᴡʜʏ ᴀʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ꜰᴜʟʟ ᴏꜰ ʀᴀɢᴇ?
ʙᴇᴄᴀᴜꜱᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀʀᴇ ꜰᴜʟʟ ᴏꜰ ɢʀɪᴇꜰ.
promo template by @honeypsd
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“𝙎𝙃𝘼𝘿𝙊𝙒 𝘼𝙉𝘿 𝘽𝙊𝙉𝙀” - 𝙄𝙉𝙎𝙋𝙄𝙍𝙀𝘿 𝙋𝙍𝙊𝙈𝙋𝙏𝙎.
hi friends!! basically, i watched the teaser trailer for season 2 of shadow and bone, got excited, began to reread the soc duology, and then these happened! or rather, i found an ancient unpublished fic i wrote after the first time i read the duology, and decided to make that a problem for everyone else! i hope you all enjoy these, you don’t need to have seen the show nor read the books, i actually think many of these are fairly fandomless! i just wanted to explain my inspiration! DON’T ADD TO THIS LIST! i’ll make more lists like this one! ily all, bon appetit, go forth and write or read or nap or watch tv or something!
“ my goodness, you’re not nearly as stupid as you look! ”
“ you have all the answers right in front of you. you just need to look at it differently. ”
“ don’t presume that you know me just because you’ve heard a few rumors and read a few articles. ”
“ there’s certainly more to you than meets the eye, isn’t there? ”
“ i urge you to remember exactly who it is you’re talking to. because while others might appreciate your tone, i assure you, i do not. ”
“ i’m concerned that you mightn’t understand what discreet means. because the path of chaos you’ve just created is exactly the opposite of discreet. ”
“ you owe me a favour. i’m here to collect. ”
“ i thought it was a good time to pay you a visit. it’s been so long, after all; and we have so much to catch up on. ”
“ you are not your father/mother/parent’s child. not by anything other than blood, and that’s not even on the spectrum of importance. ”
“ i was wrong about you. ”
“ you know, i was warned not to get involved with you. people insisted it was a fool’s decision. but i held out hope that you’d prove them wrong. now’s your chance. ”
“ i’m not the sort of person to fuss over hurt feelings. you’re either of value to me, or you’re worthless. so prove to me that you’re not the latter. ”
“ you honestly think i don’t know where you go each night? i’m not blind nor an idiot. i just trust your ability to return home unharmed. ”
“ have you told anyone else about this? ”
“ there are no children anymore. only survivors. childhood and innocence are luxuries afforded to the privileged. not us. ”
“ i offered you an opportunity once. to build a better world together. we both know how that turned out. and now, you come crawling back, begging for… what? mercy? forgiveness? ”
“ i’m with you. always. no matter what happens, i will be right by your side. do you understand? ”
“ we’re a team, aren’t we? teams stick together. even when the leader is being a prick. ”
“ …i was really worried about you, you know. you scared me earlier. and i’m not saying it to make you feel bad, it’s just… promise me you’ll tell me if things get bad again? ”
“ i can’t pretend to understand all this stuff you’ve got going on. but i do promise that i’ll be here to help you through it all. alright? ”
“ there’s a job that needs to be done before we get to work on the big task. that’s why i’m here. you’ll be helping me/us to complete both jobs. payment upon completion. ”
“ you and i aren’t as different as you want to believe. that must be why you’re so angry. because looking at me, all that i’ve done… it’s like looking in a mirror. isn’t it? ”
“ people are scared. they need a leader. and right now, like it or not, they’re looking to you. so go on. lead us. ”
“ you’ve come up with some really insane plans over the years, but this is just defying any amount of belief. ”
“ look. i don’t care if people underestimate me. i actually enjoy it. they see me as an idiot, they drop their guard, the end. but i need you to know that i’m not an idiot. okay? ”
“ people have died. we can’t let that go unpunished. ”
“ the world is changing. and if we don’t get ahead of it, then they’ll be the ones to decide what it changes into. ”
“ right! what’s the plan, then? and god help the lot of us if you don’t have one. ”
“ not all of us can afford the luxury of a conscience. ”
“ don’t make the deadly mistake of presuming my actions reflect weakness. too many have made that same presumption. and not a single one of them lived to tell the tale. ”
“ you’re scared. i can tell. the shaking, the look in your eye… you want to run. don’t. you’ll waste precious time and energy, and you’ll need it all if you want to live. ”
“ everything is gone. it’s all smoke, ruin, obliterated. is that our legacy now? our reputation? destruction, devastation, death? is that who we are? ”
“ we’ve fought against powerful enemies before, but this is beyond that. if we want to get out of this alive, we need to be smarter, stronger, better than we’ve ever been before. ”
“ don’t forget why we’re here. there’s far more at stake than our lives if this goes wrong. ”
“ you’re the only person here i trust. we need to stick together, watch each other’s backs. just because everything’s changed, doesn’t mean we have to, too. ”
“ i can’t think of anyone i’d rather be doing this crazy, ridiculous, nearly definitely lethal mission with. let’s go out with a bang, eh? ”
“ you people are completely insane. but you’re also insufferably good at this sort of thing. so let’s go save the world, shall we? ”
“ why are we fighting so hard to save the lives of people who hate us, anyway? ”
“ you’re the best there is at this sort of thing. i’d hate to see the one who got the better of you… ”
“ look at them all. going around, fussing over money, clothes, land… do they ever realize what’s going on around them? do they ever see the bigger picture as we do? ”
“ you’re clever. good. it’s nice to have a challenge. but you should know now, you’ll want to be a hell of a lot smarter than that if you want to go up against me. ”
“ you and i both know the risks. we both know what people like them are capable of. tell me it’s all okay, and i won’t question you. but if it isn’t… we need to be ready. ”
“ it’s lonely and vicious at the top. i can handle that. but you… you wouldn’t survive five minutes of this life. ”
“ you can’t survive in this world without growing a thicker skin, and erasing that naive belief that you can trust anyone you meet. least of all me. ”
“ if you’re knocking on my door, i can only imagine it means you’re here to collect. and by your demeanour, it’s one hell of a favor you’ll be asking, too. ”
“ i understand your anger. i’ve lived with that sort of rage for many years of my life. but you need to set it aside, understand? we need you calm if we want to get out of here. ”
“ oh, don’t get all sentimental. i saved your life because you’re worth more to me alive than dead. it doesn’t signify any degree of care or affection. ”
“ you have one hell of an inflated ego, you know that? we were told this job was impossible. that’s not a challenge. that’s a fact. it is not possible. even for you. ”
“ i’ve heard it all before. one more job. one more mission. one last heist. but there’s always more. it’s like some sort of obsession for you. searching for another thrill. ”
“ enough! this is it! don’t you see that?! we almost died! you almost got killed! if the saints are kind enough to save us today, it’s only so we can quit while we’re ahead! ”
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@insanislupus asked:
"Vengeance changes a person. It can make them realize what they’re capable of."
even though shay was often the mediator to thing; unless you were a drunk man bothering someone..she knew the feeling of craving revenge. to make the other feel as hurt as they’d hurt you. the way it wiggled in between your bones and never truly left. how it hid in the recesses of your mind and heart, where nothing could truly shake it. but she knew another truth as well.
‘ vengeance doesn’t always give the closure you expect however. sometimes it leaves you cold and shivering. sometimes it leaves you with a hole where the want was. you’ve gotten your vengeance but that hole never grows up. never goes away. instead it aches for the rest of your life. then you wonder if it was all truly worth it. '
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@pierprincess asked:
❝ you don’t trust me? ❞
it isn’t necessarily the others fault. but since being turned, shay hasn’t trusted, well anyone. and maybe she could have made the decision to not eat kill and then she would have the chances that star had. the ability to go back to being a normal human. but shay didn’t have that choice. not now. god, how weak had she been? how weak to the new hunger. she hadn’t forgiven herself for that just yet. how could she?
‘ it’s not you star, it’s me. i’m horrified of what i’ve become. i mean, i knew i wasn’t destined to be the best person in the world, not with the father i had. i did what i had to, in order to get away. for survival. but this death was not a survival, it was because i was weak. and i’m afraid of what i might do to anyone else. ‘‘
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@shortfell asked:
i think you should say you changed your mind. ( billy or whoever you'd like )
she furrows her brows, scrunches her nose. what exactly she was meant to change her mind on.. then again, billy isn't necessarily someone she finds easy to understand. he could be talking about anything for all she knows. or nothing that even mattered. you never really knew with the way he acted sometimes. she did know her clarifying questions would grate on his nerves. so she didn't hold back.
' what am i changing my mind on hargrove? being summer camp counselor this year? letting parker anderson take me to prom? turning in my book report two weeks early? i mean i did read seize the day back in like fifth grade anyhow. going to harvard in the fall? ' she cocks her head to the side. also like she's trying to look into his brain.
' or do you mean this as some weird threat? because if you want me to lie and say i changed my mind about harrington's party, i'm not going to. i'm going, end of discussion. '
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@godsdefied asked:
you had me. what about me? / jax :)
had him. how funny. how truly ironic. no one ever had jax teller. the only thing that owned jax was the damn motorcycle club he'd pledged his life to.
' wanna tell me exactly when that was ?? because from what i remember, you had me. i'm the one that sat around waiting to matter more than your club. that kute. but i realized it wasn't ever going to happen. so what did you expect? for me to wait for you to realize there's a world outside of charming? i thought you knew me well enough to know that isn't ME. '
she'd left. she'd went out and got the education she wanted. that she'd always planned to get, jax teller or no jax teller. she didnt have time for reminiscing on what once was. nostalgia was a liar.
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𝐚𝐬 𝐬𝐚𝐢𝐝 𝐛𝐲 𝐣𝐨𝐡𝐧 𝐤𝐫𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐫, 𝐚𝐤𝐚. 𝐣𝐢𝐠𝐬𝐚𝐰
a collection of dialogue quotes from the saw franchise.
mild horror elements. change pronouns/tenses as needed.
"You can't save people. They have to save themselves."
"Until a person is faced with death, it's impossible to tell whether they have what it takes to survive."
"I promise you, when all this is done, I will provide a way out for you."
"You think you know hidden pain, but how can you when you express your pain with such violence towards others?"
"Fear. Suffering. Death. You haven't seen anything yet."
"When faced with death, who should live versus who will live are two entirely separate things."
"You think it’s the living who have ultimate judgment over you, because the dead will have no claim over your soul. But you may be mistaken."
"As you can see, the choice is not so clear when you’re face to face with the people whose blood will stain your hands."
"You're walking us toward a precipice, [Name]. Step back."
"We all have a thumb on the scale. For good or for evil."
"The truth will set you free."
"Once you see death up close, then you know what the value of life really is."
"The last piece of the puzzle is you. "
"You're not taking into consideration the most important human element of all; the will to live."
"If you’re good at anticipating the human mind, it leaves nothing to chance."
"In return for that, I will keep no more secrets from you."
"Vengeance changes a person. It can make them realize what they’re capable of."
"I want to know if you have what it takes to survive."
"Watch over [Name], and should anything happen to her, I want you to act immediately on my behalf."
"Your life is a lie. Now comes your moment of truth."
"They say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. But I find it somewhat... distasteful, to be given credit for work that's not mine. Especially inferior work."
"Those who do not appreciate life do not deserve life."
"For years you have burned those around you with your lies, cons, and deceits."
"Once you’re in Hell, only the Devil can help you out."
"All you have to do is sit here and talk to me. Listen to me."
"You feel you now have control, don’t you?"
"Will you learn how to let go and truly save them?"
"Can you see the pain you have brought them?"
"You see things aren’t sequential. Good doesn’t lead to good, nor bad to bad."
"Everybody deserves a chance!"
"Cherish your life. Your life."
"You deny culpability, no doubt, for the circumstances in which you find yourselves."
"You want mercy? Play by the rules."
"We can never come from anger or from vengeance. You taught me that."
"Most people are so ungrateful to be alive. But not you. Not anymore"
"So are you going to watch yourself die here today, [Name], or do something about it?"
"Look around [Name] ... know that I’m not lying."
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