someonecallmymom

[someonecallmymom]

therapist: how was your week?

me: mm.. i can’t remember

#REAL

[someonecallmymom]

dr who’s on first, doctor strange is on second and doctor house is on third. theres no way theyre getting through a single inning

#fav

[someonecallmymom]

i love when people go "this looks like a 10k post to me" because it never works half the time and i just see them try so fruitlessly in my notes

[someonecallmymom]

#0 #25 really is Tumblr Old Lady

[someonecallmymom]

🦴 creaming-tomb Follow

IS JESUS UNDEAD

🦟 renfieldfriend Follow

Jesus isnt real go back to sleep

🦴 creaming-tomb Follow

THIS ISNT ABOUT WHETHER OR NOT JC WAS REAL ITS ABOUT IF HE COUNTS AS UNDEAD

🦾 frankenace Follow

I mean if he isn’t real then he doesn’t count

🦴 creaming-tomb Follow

NONE OF YOU ARE ANSWERING MY QUESTION

🧛🏻 faggotvarneys Follow

Ok if I remember correctly he’s supposed to be God but also his son which means he’s like a demigod or something? So technically him coming back to life isn’t being undead but rather some power flexing thing.

❤️‍🔥 lucywestenrasfatcock Follow

And then that piece of shit Paul decided to turn that into the worlds most vampirephobic religion

🍷exanguinations Follow

Take the power back. Drink a priest.

🦴 creaming-tomb Follow

THANK YOU FOR THE ADVICE

✝️ priestvamp-fetish-counter Follow

1

🦴 creaming-tomb Follow

CAN I HELP YOU

[someonecallmymom]

it's that time of year again

there's no ' none ' option because if you don't like any of these songs this poll isn't for you. sorry

#other #same auld lang syne

[someonecallmymom]

Welcome to Day 2 of NaNoWriMo

Tip for the day:

It doesn't matter if you didn't write anything yesterday. You can always start today.

[someonecallmymom]

[someonecallmymom]

are you taking part in no nut november

In this current climate?! Are you fucking insane? The dopamine i'm receiving from ringing the devils doorbell is the only thing stopping my mental health from collapsing into itself like the house at the end of the film Poltergeist. Let's not be silly, anon.

[someonecallmymom]

mutual 1: I want to turn that man's prostate into silly putty

mutual 2: here's smth i doodled during science class lol

mutual 3: pls remember that you personally can drink milk and still be a lactose intolerance ally!! anyone who tells you otherwise doesn't know their history :]

mutual 4: fucking a robot girl in the ass call that backend programming

mutual 5: holy shit I need him so fucking bad holy shit holyyy shit oh my god

mutual 6: anyone get kind of horny putting the ignition key in the car....it's so intimate....turning him on....

mutual 7: so lets talk about where scrimblo's arc is realistically going- I know a lot of people are trying to argue that he's being manipulated but this ignores the fact that there is clearly unresolved conflict between him and bleebus about their moralities

mutual 8: happy propeller penis thursday

mutual 9: "scrimblo and bleebus need to discuss their morality" god forbid a pathetic boywife does some torture 🙄🙄

mutual 10: WHO IS HYPED FOR THE NEW ALBUM LETS FUCKING GO

mutual 11: guys we're not getting a new album

mutual 12: please stop sending me death threats

mutual 13: why is my whole dash talking about this band I don't even listen to.....

mutual 14: hey boy nice knife wound can i put my tongue in it

mutual 15: i'm going to fall into lake michigan

[someonecallmymom]

playing sudoku in the morning: i live in the realm of numbers

playing sudoku before bed: what number come agter 6,....

[someonecallmymom]

[someonecallmymom]

[someonecallmymom]

Palpatine looks like an evil Colin Mochrie

[someonecallmymom]

[someonecallmymom]

today my bf and i were talking about visiting my home for the holidays and i was (sadly) wondering aloud if i should cut my hair and our kid was like "why would you cut your hair??? your hair is cool" and not knowing how to explain it to him i said "my family doesnt think boys should have long hair" to which he went silent, wordlessly pulled out his phone and then swiftly held it out with a picture of keeanu reeves on his phone

[someonecallmymom]