31, M, Central Illinois. Cardiophile.Collector. Political Nerd. Law Scholar. Retro Tech Enthusiast. Ask me anything and I might even know what I'm talking about.
your dom making a habit of lightly resting their hand over your throat after scenes — to make sure you’re calm and your pulse is going back to normal, obviously ♡
no video with this one, sorry! recorded in my car so audio is a bit shoddy and a little feedback-y at one point but hopefully it's still listenable lol
When I was in ninth grade I wanted to challenge what I saw as a very stupid dress code policy (not being allowed to wear spikes regardless of the size or sharpness of the spikes). My dad said to me, “What is your objective?”
He said it over and over. I contemplated that. I wanted to change an unfair dress code. What did I stand to gain? What did I stand to lose? If what I really wanted was to change the dress code, what would be my most effective potential approach? (He also gave me Discourses on the Fall of Rome by Titus Livius, Machiavelli’s magnum opus. Of course he’d already given me The Prince, Five Rings, and The Art of War.)
I ultimately printed out that phrase, coated it in Mod Podge, and clipped it to my bathroom mirror so I would look at it and think about it every day.
What is your objective?
Forget about how you feel. Ask yourself, what do you want to see happen? And then ask, how can you make it happen? Who needs to agree with you? Who has the power to implement this change? What are the points where you have leverage over them? If you use that leverage now, will you impair your ability to use it in the future? Getting what you want is about effectiveness. It is not about being an alpha or a sigma or whatever other bullshit the men’s right whiners are on about now. You won’t find any MRA talking points in Musashi, because they are not relevant.
I had no clear leverage on the dress code issue. My parents were not on the PTA; neither were any of my friend’s parents who liked me. The teachers did not care about this. Ultimately I just wore what I wanted, my patent leather collar from Hot Topic with large but flattened spikes, and I had guessed correctly—the teachers also did not care enough to discipline me.
I often see people on tumblr, mostly the very young, flail around in discourse. They don’t have an objective. They don’t know what they want to achieve, and they have never thought about strategizing and interpersonal effectiveness. No one can get everything they want by being an asshole. You must be able to work with other people, and that includes smiling when you hate them.
Read Machiavelli. Start with The Prince, but then move on to Discourses. Read Musashi’s Five Rings. Read The Art of War. They’re classics for a reason. They can’t cover all situations, but they can do more for how you think about strategizing than anything you’re getting in middle school and high school curricula.
Don’t vote third party unless you can tell me not only what your objective is but also why this action stands a meaningful chance of accomplishing it. Otherwise, back up and approach your strategy from a new angle. I don’t care how angry you are with Biden right now. He knows about it, and he is both trying to do something and not doing enough. I care about what will happen to millions of people if we have another Trump presidency. Look up Ross Perot, and learn from our past. Find your objective. If it is to stop the genocide in Palestine now, call your elected representatives now. They don’t care about emails; they care about phone calls, because they live in the past. I know this because I shadowed a lobbyist, because knowing how power works is critical to using it.
How do you think I have gotten two clinics to start including gender care in their planning?
Start small. Chip away. Keep working. Find your leverage; figure out how and when to effectively use it. Choose your battles, so that you can concentrate on the battle at hand instead of wasting your resources in many directions. Learn from the accumulated wisdom of people who spent their lives learning by doing, by making mistakes, by watching the mistakes of their enemies.
Don’t be a dickhead. Be smarter than I was at 14. Ask yourself: what is your objective?
Exercise….Again… how do you think she went this time? (Read to the end (or skip) it’s worth it)
So after last time I was told that my heart probably freaked out as I was failing at normal human needs like food and sleep. So better equipped I went out today to try again and slow.
Just a walk… maybe a preset “hike” on the treadmill… HRM linked to see the rate easy. Ecg - in case a decent trace was obtained. Stemoscope taped to my chest - a hybrid erbs spot which actually got good sound despite movement. I felt like a lab rat but was ready to go.
Choose a trek. One looks easy… but didn’t check the stats. Instant 10 grade incline. It’s ok. We’re walking at 3km/h. Easy pace. Listening to may heart in my ears. The sound is good. I’m surprised. I can hear her picking up speed and my breathing getting faster and deeper. But I feel good.
At some point I jump off the treadmill to check the ecg and the sound come recovery time. You will hear her drop. That is not the recovery. She needs a bit more pushing.
I increase the speed as my RPE is comfortable. The HRM registers in the 170s and not pushing further. I still feel fine and it’s been about 20 mins. I know I said I wouldn’t run and would take it easy. But I was feeling ok. So I reduce the incline to 0 and crank up the speed. This is the point where the recording cuts out as you can just hear my feet pounding and not my heart. Little by little I increase the speed until we hit 188. She then drops to 182 and keeps climbing and dropping between the numbers. I decide to push a bit more. We haven’t hit 190 in 5 years to that was the goal. Pushing into a sprint, it takes her about a min to realise what’s going on. I’m watching the rate on the screen 186, 189, 192.
I jump off, heartbeat pounding as fast as I’ve ever heard her. I catch my breath for a few seconds and realise I should be screen recording my ecg. She’s slowed down a bit by this point but you can see she really seems to like beating in the 140s. 😂
This time I felt fine. No dizziness. A bit quicker recovery from the 180s - 190s. 🥰