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#(and that it would be sooo impressive that everyone would make my books bestsellers when i was only 12 because it was That Good)
canonkiller
·
3 months
Text
do you consider your self made?
#my art
#self portrait of sorts
#been musing a lot on disability recently and how being relatively freshly unable to do Most Things has changed my perspective on things
#for a long time growing up i was fixated on the idea of being An Impact On The World yknow? mainly the next Big Writer
#(and that it would be sooo impressive that everyone would make my books bestsellers when i was only 12 because it was That Good)
#and i mean. obviously that didnt work out as originally planned because i was 12 and learning. but I've felt a lot like
#I've kind of built my sense of self on those big achievements. even if they were only big to me. and a lot of them
#are now out of reach or very difficult to reach. and it's been a lot to. recontextualize
#to take what ive been told my whole life and ignore it in favor of just being being enough.
#things will happen as they happen. i havent earned anything by suffering but it hasnt ended the world either
#im here doing what i Can do for as long as I'm able to do it. and thats all i need to be for now
#just making sure that i Do do the things i can do rather than assume i can do them later
#anyways. love you
#cw:
#top nudity
#artistic nudity
#the dreaded ambiguously presenting nipple
#if you put any pro weight loss eating disorder shit on here ill kill you btw
#my body is sexy because im in it and im still alive. not because its struggling to stay that way
#lindwormposting
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