#*lmfao who the fuck am i kidding this is not the paraphrased version

[thenextcelestialchapter]

Also I was expecting “The Birth of Kitaro” to be more full of feels, and it likely will be in the 2022 movie, but yeah, the manga version is hilariously brisk and not very sympathetic to Kitaro lmao... Basically goes like this, paraphrased...

Mizuki: Shit dude. Yokai blood got into the blood bank somehow and it turning people into monsters. This could hurt the company’s reputation! It’s up to me...

Mizuki: *IMMEDIATELY realizes he got way in over his head and isn’t gonna stop realizing this for like 6-7 years apparently lmao*

Mizuki: Okay so this tainted yokai blood came from... MY OWN ADDRESS?! I guess there’s that rotten old temple out back--*goes to check it out*

Mizuki: HOLY FUCKING SHIT WHAT THE FUCK ARE THESE THINGS?!?!?!

Mizuki: HOLY FUCKING SHIT WHY THE FUCK ARE THESE THINGS PREGNANT?!?!?!?

Mizuki: Dude I really gotta tell the blood bank about you guys mixing your yokai blood into the supply, I get you needed money for medicine, but this is legit harming/killing people, it’s my ethical responsibility...

Kitaro’s Dad: FUCK YOU AND FUCK ALL THEM OTHER PEOPLE, WHAT THE FUCK, YOU EXPECT ME TO JUST SIT HERE AND DIE EVEN THOUGH MY WHOLE BODY IS ALREADY ROTTING?! *SHOVES HIS ROTTEN FACE RIGHT UP NEXT TO MIZUKI’S* HMM??

Mizuki: UM... OKAY I GUESS WHEN YOU PUT IT LIKE THAT I CAN LET PPL DIE FOR 8-9 MORE MONTHS UNTIL YOU GET THIS WHOLE ‘HAVING A BABY’ THING WORKED OUT...?

Kitaro’s Dad: Oh sweet! Cool, thanks bro. :)

Mizuki, comes back 9 months later to find they’re both dead: Oh thank god that worked itself out! Guess I should bury these things. but... Damn that’s a lotta hard work. And that dad is already super icky so uh... Look I’m just gonna bury the mom, okay? Okay.

Mizuki: *hears noises coming from the grave 3 days later* Sure, I’ll check this out I guess... OH MY GOD WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT, KILL IT, KILL IT--Oh wait, it’s a baby. Sorry about that, kid! *fucks off*

Kitaro’s Dad: *the eyes that should have rotted first are apparently the last thing to go for this dude so he just straight up turns into a giant eyeball-dude and goes to help his son, apparently never once regretting fucking his zombiefied wife who was in no shape to get pregnant, jus finds his son and puts him on a leash like a dog and drags him to Mizuki’s house lmfao??*

Mizuki: *having a nice peaceful slumber--LOL NOT ANYMORE* EW OH MY GOD IT’S THAT MONSTER CHILD I TRIED TO KILL BEFORE, IN MY BED!!! ...You know what I’m just too tired, fuck it I give up, I guess I’ll “raise you as my own”, or whatever... *is totally not going to do this lmao*

Mizuki’s mom: Um... What are you going to do with that child? *a very very VERY legit question*

Mizuki: Oh mother... Can’t talk! Late for work! I’m off!

Mizuki’s mom: ...Fine. (IT LITERALLY WENT LIKE THAT LMAO... XD Like the last few lines and the next few lines basically aren’t even paraphrasing, it’s straight from the book... XD)

6 Years later... 

Mizuki’s mom: Dude that creepy Kitaro kid you took in keeps going places at night...

Mizuki: Yeah, I know...

Mizuki’s mom: SO FUCKING GO FIND OUT WHERE AND WHY!!

Mizuki: *comes back* I have no idea where he went, I lost him in the graveyard--

Mizuki’s mom: OH MY GOD JUST GET RID OF THE LIL MONSTER ALREADY?!

Mizuki: Kitaro! I followed you last night, but lost you by a tree in the graveyard! Where did you go?

Kitaro: I was playing in the world of the dead...

Mizuki: Quit yanking my chain kid, as if such a place really even exis--

Kitaro: It’s where spirits live...

Mizuki: WAIT I SUDDENLY BELIEVE YOU, WTF, CHILDREN SHOULDN’T PLAY WITH THE DEAD?! Okay I am so over this whole “raise you like my own” thing by now, my mom was right, you’re an abomination and you gotta go man...

Mizuki’s Mom: FUCKING FINALLY!

Daddy Eyeball: Oh hey, Kitaro! You’re totally not being kicked out buddy, lets go see the world! 

Kitaro, apparently: I will forever help humans because of all that you have done for me, Mizuki. I am truly grateful.

Me: And I am truly grateful... That you didn’t realize what an asshole Mizuki’s character really was and decide to never help humans ever... XD;;;;;

#gegege no kitaro #kitaro #shigeru mizuki

[firelord-frowny]

Here’s a paraphrased version* of a rant i went on earlier today when i was talkin to my mamma about violin stuff.

So, there are TONS of curriculums of varying degrees of popularity and that were designed, from the ground up, to teach violin all the way from a brand new baby beginner, aaaaallll the way up to a prodigious skill level. The most popular of these is the ~Suzuki method~ which I talked a bit about a few days ago, but there are others. 

Most of these methods have a collection of different ~volumes~ of books that are filled with pieces that are strategically placed so that each piece helps a student master a skill that they’ll need in order to play the next piece. They introduce new concepts in small, manageable doses. 

These books are literally designed for the student to learn EVERY. SINGLE. PIECE. IN. THE. BOOKS. And they’re supposed to be learned IN THE SPECIFIC ORDER THAT THEY ARE PRESENTED IN. The books also often have supplementary exercises before each piece to help the student prepare.

Just about every violin teacher on the planet will require that their students purchase at least some of these books. 

But do you know how many teachers actually teach all the pieces to the students???

The number is not much higher than 0. 

Literally, I only know ONE!!!!! violinist in my age range who said that her teacher taught her every single piece in every single Suzuki book. And you know what? She’s a fucking PHENOMENAL player. She whips Paganini out so casually. She busts out the Tchaik concerto For Funsies. 

Other than this ONE girl out of all the many dozens of violinists I’ve been well acquainted with, literally 0 of their teachers bothered to do this, including my own. 

And it’s so fucking amazingly ABSURD bc like...

these books/curriculums - Suzuki and Barbara Barber and Essential Elements and whatnot - were created by pedagogues who dedicated their lives to figuring out all the best ways to teach instrumental music. They studied. They went through trials and errors. They gathered as much information as they could. They spent thousands of painstaking hours figuring out exactly how to guide a student from Beginner to Professional, and they laid it out step-by-step in these books where everything is in perfect order. There’s no guesswork as far as when to teach what, or how to teach it, or what supplementary skills need to be taught in tandem... they put it all RIGHT FUCKIN THERE in the books...

only for 99% of teachers to completely fucking ignore it. 

Literally, i dug out my old Barbara Barber book 2 today and discovered that the very first piece includes techniques that I’m still shitty at today. 

BOOK 2!!!! TWO!!!! TEE DOUBLEYOU OH!!!! ONE TWO!!!! The technique in question is left-hand-pizz on open strings. Which like, I can DO it, but I struggle to maintain a steady tempo. And the passages of the piece that use the technique are strategically placed for the specific purpose of helping the student learn to keep a steady tempo. 

What’s EXTRA ridiculous about this is that my old teacher - the shitty one - actually TOLD me to go out and buy all the Barbara Barber books in the first year I studied with her. There were six of them. Six books! Starting with volume 1 that was filled with beginner rep, and ending with volume 6, which was early/semi-professional rep. 

But do you think she started me out in book 1?

LMAO OF COURSE NOT, SHE STARTED ME IN BOOK FOOOOOUUUUURRRRRR!!!!!!! 

can you imagine??? making your student go out and buy books 1-6 and then starting them with book 4??? 

you’d think that she at least had me go to book 5 next, but why the FUCK would she do something so logical when, instead, she could skip me right to THE LAST PIECE IN BOOK SIX????? 

And then, naturally, she forced me to play butcher Paganini 24. 

STUPID!

Anyway, when I talked about all this with the one girl I know whose teacher actually bothered to teach her everything, I brought up how my teacher and many other teachers I know are so eager to ~skip~ their students based on their assessment that many pieces are “too easy/simple” for the student, and she responded by telliing me about how her teacher basically taught her that just because something seems “simple” doesn’t mean there still isn’t a lot to be learned from it. She talked about how in the event that she was already adept at the technical skills introduced in any new piece, instead of just skipping it, the teacher would use it as an opportunity to develop the subtler aspects of her musicianship - phrasing, timbre, color, artistic interpretation, harmonic analysis... things that would help her be all the more prepared for the more complicated, demanding pieces she’d be learning later on. 

That makes so much fucking sense, it’s honeslty offensive to me that that mindset isn’t held by every single teacher in the world. 

#*lmfao who the fuck am i kidding this is not the paraphrased version #this is the expounded upon version complete with appendixes and a foreword and an afterword