#-- this is for the grown folks. touch grass and sit this one out minors.

[ashes-writing]

outer banks ● one girl, two guys pt 8 ● j.maybank + t.thornton ● [18+]

warning

18+ only. MDNI with this chapter, don't you dare. Filth, babes. sheer filth {sexual warnings : unprotected sex, marking / biting, overuse of the word fuck, p in v, body fluids, virgin!reader gets her v!card punched by Tops, touching/affection, gentle dirty talk, nudity}. Also warnings of angst and jealousy, and tension between Kiara and JJ in the v. beginning of the chapter. A continued complicated series of relationships between like... three different couples if you count Sarah/John B -absent from this chapter bc I can only write Sarah so much before I'm done for a while- Underage drinking / smoking +w**d mentions at a future point in the story, angst and jealousy, arguing / confrontations and actual physical fights, Topper's issues with his mom and reader/your issues with your own, copious amounts of PDA and I swear to God, a writer who has not one fucking clue how to go about properly executing a love triangle to save her pathetic life but she is trying, lmao.

<- reader/you are a female. with female working parts, clothes/hair/personality, etc. Nicknames and petnames are in use here. this is self-indulgent, to be honest and I have zero shame.

word count

4941 exactly. for any missing context you need part 7 <- can be clicked and you should be taken straight there.

summary

-- you're torn between your long standing feelings for your best friend JJ Maybank and now, you're starting to fall for Topper Thornton, a Kook. This won't get messy at all, right?

taglist + shoutouts

-- the taglist is here. click to be taken straight to it if you want to be added to my tags for outer banks or anything else listed that I write for.

@tbmunson bestieeee i love youuuu. and the moment we've been waiting on is finally here? Well, the first part of it, at least. You're my inspiration and I want to be like you when I grow up.

@writingreadinglurkingandsmirking bestieee heyyyy.. i have enjoyed talking to you and your commentary on these posts oh my god. you make my life, your comments mean so much to me, you have no clue.

@stilesstilinskisgf oh my god you're so sweet I can't even. thank you so much. from the bottom of my heart, babes. you don't know how much your comments mean to me.

@music4life42 you wanted to be tagged in everything babes. idk if you're familiar with this but like.. enjoy! Also if this isn't your thing, pls tell me!

@valentineshiftz your comments make my day and you always make me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. I'm so glad you're enjoying this and I can't even begin to tell you how much your comments mean to me babes!

other links

masterlist ● jj's masterlist ● toppers masterlist ● about + rules

“Do you love her, JJ?”

Kiara’s question is something JJ was not prepared for. And he doesn’t want to answer it, either. Because answering it means that it’s out and he can’t take it back. He tries to change the conversation a time or two but Kiara’s staring him down, waiting on an answer.

“Do you love her? It’s not a hard question.”

“It is though. Because if I answer it and you don’t like my answer, Kie..” JJ drops the wrench he has in his hands and he swears in frustration. “We need to get the boat going again. Now isn’t the time, okay?”

“Screw the boat. I’m sick of doubting everything, JJ. Do you even realize how much that’s messing with my mind? I mean, since she told me..” Kiara takes a deep breath and goes quiet. Knees to her chin as she stares out at the still water. JJ rubs his forehead and takes a deep breath. “ I do..”

Kiara looks so hurt when he admits it. He drags a hand over his head. “She only said anything about it in the first place because you kept pushing, Kie. Sometimes when you push, you don’t get the answer you want.”

“Why..” Kiara starts to ask him why he’s with her if he loves you, but she goes quiet. Grabs a wrench and starts to work on the boat with JJ. And the tension between them is heavy and awkward and scary as hell. Because Kiara doesn’t want this to be over. She doesn’t want to lose him.

She wishes she’d just kept her questions to herself. With both of you.

JJ drops the wrench again and he’s swearing because he’s busted his knuckle open again. Kiara takes his hand in hers, surveying the injury. Fussing over it a little and JJ takes a deep breath. “The problem is that I love you too, Kie.”

Kiara relaxes but only a little. “Who do you love more?”

“I really don’t know. I just know that if __ and I were a thing I’d fuck up and I’d lose her somehow.”

“So what? You just don’t care if you fuck things up and lose me?” Kiara asks, a hurt look in her eyes as she drops hold of his hand. JJ groans to himself. Wants to take back everything, wishes like hell he had a rewind button because if he did, he’d be using and abusing it right now. “It’s not like that, Kie. I’ve known her longer, okay? We’re.. We’re closer.”

Kiara swallows hard. “Okay then.”

When she starts to walk away, JJ throws the wrench and takes off, catching up to her. “Will you just leave this alone? I’m with you, alright? Not her. Can’t that just be enough, darlin?”

Kiara looks up at him and she’s really mulling it over. “But if she comes to you and tells you she still loves you..”

“Then I’ll figure it out if it even happens. I really fucked it up, alright? I don’t think you gotta worry about that anymore.” JJ looks like even thinking about it is killing him and seeing this is killing Kiara. But she wants him too. She loves him. It’s not fair and now that she has him at last, she’s spent every single second doubting and worrying, stressing over every little stupid fight instead of just.. Enjoying their relationship.

It’s just starting to get to her.

And if she has to lose him, she’d rather do it now than keep waiting, get even more attached and then have him one day just walk out. Or worse, settle for her and wake up five, ten.. Even fifteen years from now if they’re lucky enough to make it that long, and regret it all, loathe the sight of her.

“I do, though. I do because I love you so much and I don’t want to lose you. I mean it, JJ.”

“I know, darlin. C’mere.” JJ pulls her against him and wraps his arms around. And he feels so damn guilty when he finds himself wondering what you’re doing. Wondering if you miss him at all, if you even think about him anymore because it’s already started.. You can pass him lately and it’s like you don’t even see him.

He’s guilty of the same.

But it’s just easier to do it that way right now. There’s no potential for that final friendship-ending fight that JJ can feel brewing deep in his bones. He’s dreading when it happens. And he’s dreading it so much that he doesn’t reach out like he’s dying to.

And this is also driving him crazy because there’s never been a time that he hasn’t been able to talk to you, to tell you anything and everything and he really misses that. He misses you and it’s killing him.

But missing you is better than losing you entirely. Especially given that he knows if he loses you, it’s totally his own fault.

–

You’re still sleeping but Topper is awake. Propped on one arm, watching the way your chest rises and falls. Snickering to himself when he hears your light snores now and again. You keep squirming, it’s almost like you’re seeking something out.

The answer as to what you’re seeking out becomes clear when he hears you mumble his name. His breath hangs in his throat. At first he tells himself he didn’t hear you whimpering his name. And he has himself nearly convinced until about the time you do it again, accompanied by a very needy and sleepy, “I wanna be closer.”

He hooks an arm between your legs after rolling onto his back. He pulls you so that you’re lying draped on top of him and his arms wrap around you. The way you’re laid on top of him with your face buried in his neck has him biting back several quiet groans as thick fingers dig into the skin exposed by the way your tie-dye shirt has ridden up over your thighs and ass. Your lips graze right against his racing pulse and he can’t stop the groan that escapes. When you giggle and mumble something else, something entirely muffled by his warm skin, he snaps his hips, rocking himself up into you before he can stop it. 

“What’d you say, love?” he questions, wondering if maybe you’re awake.

You mumble again but a snore is right on the tail of it so he knows you’re still sleeping. And then he feels himself get hot all over as soon as he realizes exactly what’s happening.

You’re dreaming.. About him.

And if the way you keep trying to disappear and be dissolved by his body is any indication, it’s not just your average dream, either. When you manage to rub against him for the fourth time, he’s so hard he could break. And he’s trying so damn hard not to give in to his more primal urges, the ones that want to wake you up with his mouth against your skin leaving marks behind and his cock buried deep inside you.

You’re dreaming about Topper again. It’s more vivid, more intense than any other night up to this point. It’s so intense that you can almost smell the faintest hint of his designer cologne lingering in the air, woodsy and clean all at once. You can feel his hands on you, his breath against your ear just like the night before when he whispered good night before he finally crashed.

“Topper..” you whine, the needy sound ripped right out of you and muffled against his racing pulse, “Need you. Please.” you’re begging for it in your sleep and he’s lying there,stunned.

“I’m right here, love.” he mumbles quietly.

“No.” you whine again, “I mean I need you. Now.” your voice is slurred, thick with sleep. Soft and dreamlike. Topper takes several deep breaths to try and bring himself back under control but he’s dangerously close to his breaking point.

A loud noise makes you jump, waking you up and he’s able to pull himself together as you open your eyes and give him a very sheepish look as you settle in your bed beside him. He pouts because he misses the weight of you on top of him. But he rolls onto his side and raises a hand, caressing the side of your face. And there’s an almost teasing gleam in his eyes as he yawns and asks if you had a good nights sleep.

“I did, actually.”

“Me too.” and he’s not lying, not even slightly. The way you kept trying to dissolve yourself into him through the night felt so good. It’s a feeling that lately, when he sleeps alone, in his own bed at his mom’s place on Figure 8, he really misses.

,, go ahead. Cling to her, man. That’s what pushed Sarah away, remember?” the thought comes and his face transforms to this somber, million miles away look that you pick right up on, frowning. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah.” he makes himself smile, focuses his attention on you. “I’m fine. Still tired, I guess.”

“Oh god, I’m sorry.. I’m the worst person to share a bed with..” you go quiet. Topper pulls you closer to him and presses a wary kiss against your hairline. “It’s not that.”

“Oh.”

“I was just thinking that lately, this is the only way I can actually sleep. That was.. I should not have said that, __.”

“No, it’s fine.” you lock eyes with him, raising  your hand. You press your thumb against his lip for a second and admit quietly, “Me too.”

Topper’s breath hangs. He plays it off with a chuckle. “Oh really?” he questions, rolling you onto your back as he settles on top of you. Your breath hangs too, released a second later oh so shaky.

“Mhm.” you answer, face feeling as if it’s on fire. You can barely hold his gaze because he’s got this hungry look in his eyes and as they settle on you, you’re fidgety. Mind replaying the very dirty dream you just barely finished having about him not even ten minutes before. Which only makes you fidget more and you’re not sure what to do with  your hands. Or the rest of your body. Topper grips your hip with his hand and gives it a gentle warning squeeze. Biting his bottom lip as he continues to stare down at you and presses himself down into you heavier. His body engulfing your own.

“ I heard you, y’know..” he mumbles as his mouth closes in on yours for another kiss because he can’t take it, he has to kiss you or it’s going to drive him crazy. You're frozen. At first, confused and then as you realize what you might have said, you're mortified so you attempt hiding your face. But he chuckles quietly. Gives you a sweet peck on the lips, "No need to be embarrassed, baby. And trust me, I am..definitely flattered."

"What'd I say?" You ask the question but honestly you're half scared of the answer. He settles himself over you more heavily til you're engulfed by his taller frame and completely pinned beneath him. You're staring at his lips and dying for a kiss and you just..can't. It's too much. It's overload. And you cave into the urge, your fingers tug at his hair as you pull his mouth into your own, a clumsy and needy kiss that leaves him breathless when you both have to pull away to breathe. 

"Are you sure you want the answer?" he asks, gazing deep into your eyes as his hips pin you flat. He's still trying to process everything, from the kiss to what's currently happening right this minute and most importantly, the way you just kissed him seconds ago because hes never been kissed like that before. 

"No and yes." you feel like your whole body is on fire, with a healthy portion of it settled in the pit of your stomach and lower, your core. As he starts to tell you exactly what you said in your sleep, his mouth crashes against your own, each word -and your accompanying whimpers and whines- are swallowed in deep and needy kisses all over again.

His hands are roaming, one settles over your wrists, circling to pin your hands over your head. The other hand settles on your ass and you can't stop the whine that comes as he starts to squeeze. His mouth breaks away, moving down the column of your neck. A quiet growl slips out as his lips latch hard against your skin. When he bucks into you because he's completely lost his usual filter, you whine and rub against him as the need grows even more, rising within you  like steam in a hot shower. "Fuck." he groans out against you as the two of you continue to seek friction, growing frustrated because there's too much between you and the more friction you get the more friction you crave.

Your hand slips down between your bodies and you gently tug on his waistband with a needy whine and Topper bites back a quiet growl. Stops leaving marks all over your neck to stare at you and catch his own breath. “Do you want something,love?”

But you can’t form words because you’re overwhelmed. This is all new to you. You’ve never gone this far, the most you’ve done is a kiss or two here and there. Topper grips your jaw light and makes you look at him. “Do you want something, love? Because whatever you want..” you’re rubbing against him again, getting wetter by the second and he’s desperate for the way it feels, but he needs to hear you say it. “Fuck.”  he groans out, bucking himself right back into you, “It’s all yours.”

“You.” you whine in need. “Wanna feel closer.” you hook a finger beneath the waistband of his shorts and your breath hangs in your throat; your heart feels like it might explode. You don’t want to stop and maybe in the back of your mind, you feel just a little guilty because this is not how you carefully planned your first time, but it’s him. And the weight of him on top of you feels so good, so reassuring. You want him so much. Topper bites his lip as he stares down at you and tries to catch his breath. It starts to click for him and normally, this is where he’d stop. But he wants you so much. All to himself.

He can’t stop it from happening and as he presses a few kisses to the front of your throat and his hands wander your body all over again, he realizes he doesn’t want to stop it from happening. Because he wants you and you want him back and it’s all he’s really ever wanted.

“You’re sure.” he questions and you nod, biting back a quiet whimper as his hands catch in either side of your shirt, working it up your body. He pulls away to stare down at you and you try to throw up your arms because you’ve never done this, your instinct is to hide your body. He gently pushes down your arms and settles himself on top of you all over again, letting out a sharp hiss as he soaks in the way your skin feels pressed right up against his. “Have you..” he starts to ask if you’ve ever done this before but stops himself, goes quiet because he just feels like he knows the answer already.

“No.” you mumble quietly, almost sheepish and apologetic. He groans quietly. He’s got his forehead resting against the swell of your breasts as he tries to pull himself together yet again. His fingers dig against your sides and he looks up at you after peppering a few kisses against your skin, pulls himself up your body enough that your mouths crash against each other all over again. “I haven’t.” you admit. Your cheeks on fire.

“ ‘S okay, love.” he reassures you. “I’ve got you.” and he’s moving down your body. Parting your legs with his hands, an arm hooking beneath each leg as his nose brushes up against the wet fabric serving as a barrier. Inhaling the scent of you deep. Cock getting even harder at the way you’re already dripping for him. Your hand catches in his hair, giving a tug to blond tipped ends as you squirm beneath him. He slips an arm out from beneath one of your legs and the silent rip as he tears your panties away and slides them down your leg has you whining even more. Louder. As he begins to trail his tongue up the inside of your thigh in a determined march, his free arm slips beneath your leg again, fingers digging against soft skin. “So sweet.” he mutters in awe. “Can’t wait to taste you,sweetheart.”

“Topper.” you whine, arching your back as he slips an arm free again and his fingers work you open, the pad of his thumb pressing against and massaging your clit. And if you thought you were wet before, it’s so much worse now, you can feel the slick as it rolls down the insides of your thighs and drips down, pooling beneath your body on the bed sheets. 

“So wet for me, love. Good girl.” he gazes up at you and you bite your lip, rocking your hips up to meet his fingers as they bury inside you deep. “Topper.” your cry echoes off the walls of your bedroom, shattering the silence.

And on your nightstand, your cell phone is going crazy.

“Fuck.” he groans out against your mound as your hands catch in his hair as he lowers his head to bury it between your thighs, “So fucking sweet.” his tongue rolls up your center in a broad stripe that sends a shiver racing through you and has you clutching at his hair, tugging harder. He nips at skin, lips latching, leaving a mark and his tongue joins his fingers as they massage and scissor inside you. Your head falls back and you whine, louder this time. Moaning his name as tension starts to build hard and fast in the pit of your stomach. You’re desperately trying to rock your hips as his fingers strum against the spongy soft of your spot once and then again. He grips your hip with his free hand, raising it just a little and you’re almost seeing stars by this point, your toes digging into the comforter beneath you as Topper’s tongue swirls inside you, matching the pace set by his fingers.

“Let go, love. C’mon..” he begs, pausing to look up at you, watching the way your face twists in ecstasy, your eyes fluttering open and shut as your mouth falls open. “Let me taste you, baby.”

Your first orgasm shatters you completely and you’re clumsy and frantic, thrusting against his tongue and fingers as they continue to push you, coax you down from your high. He growls against your skin, sucking on your clit until you feel like you’ll see stars and it’s starting to throb painfully. “Topper, oh.. Fuck.” you whine, fingers catch in his hair as you try to get him to stop and look up at you.

But he’s determined. He’s addicted to the way you sound when you moan his name and he’d die to hear it again. And again.

“Baby, I can’t.” you whine out as he tries to coax you into another orgasm. “Hurts.”

Topper chuckles quietly. “C’mon, love.. I know you have one more.”

“Baby, I need you. Now.” you beg. Gripping his jaw to make him look up at you. He moves up your body and you melt against the mattress as he settles on top of you, his body engulfing yours, holding your legs open. “I can..” you start to tell him that you can go down on him but he shakes his head. “Next time, love. This is about you, okay?” he’s staring down at you, eyes full of adoration. His mouth meets yours in a slow and lazy, sweet kiss and you whine at the taste of yourself in his mouth. He lines his cock up with your throbbing, needy cunt and eases himself into you, going completely still when he’s halfway in and he feels your entire body clench as if it hurt.

He’s so thick and this is your first time so as he slips into you, it feels as if you’re being split in two. But there’s a pleasure in the way it burns and you’re attempting to rock yourself up and down his thick, veiny member as you grip his shoulders and cling to him. He chuckles. “Just be still, baby. You..” he groans, biting at your neck gently and leaving another mark behind, another one that won’t be well hidden at all, “You gotta get used to me.”

“Topper.” you whine his name and the way you’re clinging to him has him melting inside. Because right now, you need him. You want him so bad you’re whining and clinging to him and it just feels so fucking good. He never wants it to end and he knows that now, he’s going to be addicted.

You’re starting to get used to the way he fills you and you’re rocking yourself against him, clumsy and slow. Which is a damn good thing because your walls grip him and squeeze like a vise and it’s been a while and this all feels way too good for him. He can feel his cock flinch, an orgasm barely held at bay with every little move you make until he pulls halfway out, cock-warming you as he tries to fight his way back from the edge. “Easy, love.” he coaxes, warm and breathy against the shell of your ear, “I wanna..” his eyes flutter open and closed because you’re trying to pull him all the way into you and it just feels so good,”Fuck.” he groans out, “Take my time with you.”

“Baby, please.” you’re begging even more now, whiny and needy, the two very things you go above and beyond to avoid being but your filter is gone, you can’t think about anyone or anything else but how good.. How solid the weight of him feels as he presses himself down into your body completely, a hand raising to pin your hands flat against the pillow by your wrist. How good it feels every single time his mouth conquers your own.

You’re chasing his cock, trying to pull him completely in and your nails catch against muscular shoulders, dragging down his back. He groans at the way it feels and when you manage to wrap your legs around his hips, he chuckles into your mouth. “How’s that feel, love?” he asks, picking up the pace of his deep thrusts just slightly. It’s enough but somehow, it’s also not enough at the same time. You whine out his name, nipping at the  shell of his ear, “So good. So good, Topper, don’t..” you moan as his cock bottoms out once and then all over again in the next deep drive, “Don’t stop, please don’t stop.” 

He  slows way down and you’re pouting about it, he’s peppering every exposed inch of skin with soft kisses and little nips. Breathless as he gazes down at you, enjoying every second of the way it feels to watch you come apart below him, pinned. Taking his cock over and over. And his mind is still blown that he’s the only guy to have you like this yet. “Oh you want me to keep goin, huh?” he chuckles against the curve of your neck, glancing at you. You nod eagerly. Clinging to him. Tears glisten in your eyes.

And if he thought he was falling too hard and too fast for you before, he’s proven wrong because the way you’re looking up at him, the way you’re touching him, the way you chase down every single inch of his cock when he pulls out halfway and you’re frantic to get him buried back inside of you… It feels so good. He knows he’s as good as fucked and there’s nothing he won’t do to be the only boy you ever want or need again. He’s already fallen, it’s too late. Now nothing will do but him.. Getting you all to himself. Where he can give you the love you deserve.

“Please?” you beg, breathless. Falling head over heels with no filter or censor to stop it. Giving yourself over to the way it feels so good when he holds you and the way he kisses you like he needs you to breathe. It’s scary, feeling the way you feel about him. It’s scary and it’s thrilling. 

Topper starts to speed up, his hands grip your hips roughly, squeezing with every single deep drive he makes. “You feel so good, love. So fucking good. You’re such a good girl, takin me so well.” he mutters against your ear as he coaxes, “Think you can give me another, baby?”

“Fuck.” you whine out against his collarbone as you cling to him and your pussy clenches him tight, your orgasm shattering through you and leaving you dizzy, colored dots lining your vision as he melts down into you even more. Because skin to skin is the closest he can get to you and he knows it, but somehow, it’s just not enough and he craves more. It’s getting harder and harder to control himself and fight off his own orgasm. He pulls out halfway, cock-warming you again as he crashes his mouth against yours and when you deepen the kiss, try to pull him back inside you, he’s almost shaking because he continues to try to hold it at bay. “Don’t wanna cum yet, love..” he groans out as he nips at your bottom lip, teeth tugging at soft skin, “Wanna last longer for you.”

“Topper, baby.. Please, I need it. Need you.” you whine and the sound is so needy, so sweet, a hushed whimper against his throat as your lips latch on. He doesn’t want to stop because he doesn’t want to pull out of you just yet, you fit together with him too well.

It’s going to be addicting, he can feel it deep in his bones already.

He goes still, pressing his lips against your hairline as he raises a hand to caress your face and both of you try again and fail again at attempting to catch your breath because you just can’t keep your mouths away from each other long enough to do so.

But he can’t hold off any longer, he can feel himself getting so dangerously close and no amount of stopping or tensing up is helping at all. His thrusts turn sloppy as the sound of skin meeting skin echoes off the wall of your bedroom, shattering the silence. You’re clinging to him all over again, your nails leaving crescents in the back of his shoulders as he bottoms out, making you moan his name. Louder. He shatters, his hips stammering as his cock throbs, empties, painting your walls white and you dig your nails and whine, pulling him down on top of you completely, your mouth crashing against his in a deep kiss as he comes down from the high.

As the two of you lie there, he grimaces at a particularly deep mark he’s left on the  side of your neck. “I didn’t.. I didn’t hurt you, right?”

“No. It felt so good. So good,baby.” you mumble, a yawn cutting into your words. He falls to the bed beside you and immediately pulls you against him all over again, dragging his fingers up and down your spine to trace it. 

And neither of you can bring yourself to ask the question you’re both dying  to. You choose to snuggle yourself up to him and just enjoy the way it feels to lie there, skin to skin, his arms around you. Because maybe if you don’t push. Maybe if you just lean into whatever is happening… Maybe it’s just better this way.

But you’re already dreading in the back of your mind what you’re pretty sure will wind up happening. Sooner or later, this will be over. Because he’s bored, he has to be. And you’ll keep telling yourself that until you don’t secretly hope that it’s not the case. Because it’s the only defense you have.

Deep down you know it’s too late, you know you’re falling for him. You just can’t bring yourself to admit it yet.

,, because what are the chances he’ll feel the same.” you wonder to yourself as you nuzzle your face against his chest and settle yourself against him, turned to the side so you can still sort of see the television. Topper catches himself staring down at you as you drift off to sleep and he takes a few shaky breaths.

Every part of him is dying to talk about what just happened, but every part of him is also scared to death to bring it up. As he watches you dozing off, he decides that maybe he should just let it be. Maybe just letting it happen is better than pushing. Coming off too needy. Wanting you all to himself way too much. 

Because look how well that worked out for him before.

But everything about this feels so much different. And he knows it already. It’s too late. He’s in over his head.

#jj maybank #topper thornton #jj maybank fanfiction #topper thornton fanfiction #jj maybank imagine #topper thornton imagine #topper thornton smut #jj maybank x kiara carrera #jj maybank x yn #topper thornton x reader #topper thornton x you #<- my writing ● topper thornton #<- my writing ● jj maybank #<- warning | 18+ only - this chapter ● pinv unprotected biting marking + c*ck warming ● jealousy and complicated relationships ● see warnin #<- warning | female reader ● female parts /clothing / hair / personality + nicknames petnames. #-- this is for the grown folks. touch grass and sit this one out minors.

[hawleydaniels85-blog]

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