#I didn't have cable until I was like. a full teen

[dont-blame-it-on-the-kids]

Have you some angsty Lin or Kyalin hc? 🥺

Me: writes Fluff ONCE

Y'all: ang is.... sick?

SO off we Gooooo

Kyalin-

Lin and Kya (after the linzin break up) are fwb for a while but Lin catches feelings and hates Kya breezing in and out of her life and it eats her alive until Kya leaves for the last time after Aang passes to go live with Katara

After Amon Lin stays with in the south in the large family dorms / house they have set up at the Outpost they raised korra in. Kya stays with her and they often find Lin in Kya's room tears staining her face as she clings to the waterbender like a lifeline. Sometimes they find Kya knelt beside Lin's bed with her head and arms resting next to Lin's hip holding her hand tightly as Kya seemingly cried herself to sleep kneeling at Lin's bedside.

After Zaheer Lin doesn't leave Kya's side for months. It takes them all a while to recover and until Kya can walk mostly on her own Lin is right there next to her and when Kya wakes up from the nightmares and doesn't see Lin she sobs and screams, panicking that they were back and had gotten Lin. Bumis ran in a few times to assure her Lin's getting breakfast for them and would be back in a minute. Kya clings to Bumi tightly still crying because she was terrified of them getting Lin. She breaks down when she hears Suyin tell the story about how they killed P'Li because Lin Could Have Died and she knowingly did that.

Lin dies a few years after series end at like 59 because they're fighting a big bad electric bender and she basically uses her cables and metal suit as a lightning rod in the final showdown so Korra and the team can get close enough to land a good hit and take him down. Korra still wakes up in a cold sweat remembering Lin's scream of agony as she was hit and how Lin's body lay collapsed in the streets after the fight was over. Sometimes Mako wakes himself up shouting for Lin to wake up in his nightmares.

Kya -

She and Bumi fought after he got airbending. They had been the disappointment kids for 54 years then he got bending and suddenly Tenzin payed attention to him and respected him more and Kya was suddenly the odd one out and felt she didn't have her big brother anymore.

After Zaheer Kya finds herself getting winded and more and more unable to catch her breath after rough activity. The damage done by the fights then the fall she and Bumi took worse than they thought and she never gets her full lung copasity back. Better hope the ATLA/LOK universe has Oxygen tanks cuz she's going to need one by 70.

When she was a young teen and Yakone was in the streets she taught herself how to bloodbend using animals so that way she could help her mother defend the others should Yakone attack. She didn't realize he could bloodbend all the time and she was limited to an extremely narrow window. Katara never finds out she learned and she's truly ashamed she kept it from her mother her whole life.

Kya keeps a small book containing the names or situations she's lost someone she was trying to heal or rescue. She reads them once a week and apalogizes to them that she wasn't able to help and promises that in their names she would train to be better.

The last name in the book is Lin Beifong.

Lin-

First of all the one you all know and love. The scar on her face goes up further than depicted in the show (ratings to blame I guess) and she is blind in her right eye. She uses her earth sense to make up for it and never lets anyone know because she would have been disqualified for the Cheif position had people known.

She shuts down after Aang dies. He was the closest she had to a parent he loved her and told her so. He always said how proud he was of her and that she was doing her best. So when he passed she emotionally sealed off cuz that was the last straw then a year after tenzin broke up with her, Kya and Katara were leaving and Bumi had to go back to the forces. For the first time in her life lin was truly alone and she didn't know what to do.

Lin at one point gets trapped in the Fog of Lost Souls while on a mission where gangs ran into the portal and she's trapped there for a week before Mako and Opal find her and are able to save her. She doesn't speak or look at anyone for two weeks after then she speaks with Katara for an extended period of time and slowly comes back to her normal life.

She kind of adopts Asami Mako and Bolin, after she passes all three of them continue the weekend tradition of meeting up for lunch only now with a picture of Lin instead of the chief herself and they talk about their week with eachother and it hurts but it's familiar and helps them stay together and not feel alone.

#heavy angst #hc

[our-smooty]

5/7

Fandom: Gorillaz

Rating: Teen

Relationships: 2Russ

Tags: Murdoc being an asshole, Hurt/Comfort, Developing Relationship Cute, Snuggling

Summary: Russel is stuck in the 5th stage of grieving, Depression. 2D is having a bad time in the romance department. Maybe they can help each other out more than they thought.

Russel was woken from his nap by loud shouting. That wasn’t necessarily out of the ordinary; on the contrary, it seemed like someone--Murdoc--was always shouting in the halls of Kong. The reason Russel was concerned this time was that 2D was shouting as well and that never boded well for the harmony of the band. Murdoc didn’t take well to what he perceived to be challenges to his authority, and it sounded like that was exactly what he was doing. So Russel groaned, pulled on a shirt, and left his room to go break up their fight.

“You always do this!” 2D was standing in the living room, a ways away from Murdoc who was standing over by the bar. The bassist was definitely drunk, but no more than he usually was on a Monday afternoon, and scowling something fierce in 2D’s direction. The singer was fully dressed while Murdoc was only wearing boxers and his upside down cross. It didn’t take a genius to figure out what was going on.

“She was a slag anyway,” Murdoc answered, waving a hand. “Did you a favour, really.”

“Don’t you say that about her! S-she was a nice girl and I--” Murdoc cackled. Russel felt the hairs on the back of his neck go up and he wasn’t even involved.

“She was a slut, jus’ like the rest of them. S’not surprisin’ that’s the only type of girl y’can get to sleep with you.”

Russel watched 2D shift from foot to foot self-consciously. Murdoc always was good at finding exactly the right buttons to press to make it hurt the most. Russel didn’t have too much experience on the other end since Murdoc was too scared he’d break his nose for the 9th time, but he’d seen the man in action enough to know.

“What’d you m-mean?” 2D stuttered. Russel was pretty sure he hadn’t seen him yet, even though the drummer was standing in the doorway. Murdoc grinned.

“Well I mean, jus’ look at you. You might have a pretty face, but then there’s the rest of you….” The bassist gestured to 2D’s chest and arms. “Birds like a man with a bit of muscle; s’why they always come crawlin’ back to me. Did you know I didn’t even come on to that tart? She came to me, practically gagging for it--”

Russel had heard enough. From the doorway, he cleared his throat, cutting Murdoc off mid-tirade. The bassist clammed up immediately at the sign of Russel, posture relaxed but looming.

“That’s enough, Murdoc,” Russel said simply as he walked over to 2D. He hadn’t said anything yet, but his posture was telling, all caved in and defensive. It made Russel’s chest ache. “Go the fuck back to your nasty-ass trailer.”

Murdoc looked like he wanted to argue, but he didn’t. Instead, he grabbed the bottle he’d been pouring himself drinks from and stalked off, murmuring under his breath. Russel watched him go until he rounded the corner, then turned to 2D.

“You alright man?” Stu didn’t react, his gaze trained into the distance where Murdoc had walked off to. Russel put a hand on the singer’s shoulder--it was boney and cold--and he jumped at least a foot in the air. “Didn’t mean to scare you.”

“N-no, it’s fine,” 2D answered, glancing around the room. “Did Murdoc leave?”

“Yeah.” He must have been really spaced out. “I told him to fuck off. You doin’ OK?”

Russel watched as 2D put on a fake smile and shrugged. The singer had been doing that a lot since coming back, trying to push through the bullshit. “Oh, y-yeah, I’m good. I know Murdoc’s jus’ an asshole.”

He wasn’t sure what to do. Stu was obviously upset and trying to hide it like he often did. He was sensitive, despite his new cocky attitude and switchblades. Murdoc took advantage of that a lot and had been really trying to put him back in his place. Russel wasn’t sure which was better, going back to the old status quo or having 2D finally stand up for himself.

“He is. You know everythin’ he says is bullshit, right?” 2D shrugged again and walked over to the bar, taking Murdoc’s previous seat. Russel followed him, knowing how forgetful 2D could be about mixing alcohol and his medication.

“He’s righ’ though.” Russel moved the nearest bottle of alcohol further away. “If those girls really liked me they wouldn’t go to him…”

“He’s always goin’ on about making deals with the devil, I wouldn’t put it past him to have some sort of chick-magnet power or something,” Russel said in a weak attempt to cheer the singer up. 2D looked up at him with those big, dark eyes. So open and trusting, even after everything that had happened.

“You think so? Thanks, Russ,” the singer replied, voice watery and slightly insincere. Russel shifted side to side awkwardly, unsure of what he was supposed to do now, the niggling instinct to hug the smaller man everpresent. He’d broken up the fight, but now he was worried about what 2D might do in his current mode.

“D’you wanna watch a movie or somethin’? Murdoc said the cable was workin’ again after last time…” Last time when the bassist had tossed a shoe at the TV and broken not only the screen but also the cable box. 2D sniffled trying to hide his tears. Russel didn’t know how else to help.

“I dunno, I might jus’ go to my room. I can feel a headache comin’ on, I think.” Russel nodded and put his hand on the singer’s shoulder again, making sure he saw him this time.

“OK, I’ll be around if you need me.” He gave the other’s shoulder a quick squeeze, then let go and wandered back to his bedroom. 2D waved to him with a slight smile. Russel hoped that was a good sign. He smiled back then headed to his bedroom back down the hall.

Back in his room, the light still off, Russel sat on the bed. It was getting late in the afternoon, he really shouldn't keep sleeping the whole day away like this. Only coming out for practice, or for food. Or when a fight broke out. Otherwise, he was in here, sleeping or watching TV on the screen above his bed. His taxidermy projects lay mostly untouched since he returned, gathering dust on the desk. Things just hadn’t been the same since… well, since he came back alone. He didn’t want to think about it. So another nap then. Maybe he’d sleep through the night and into the morning.

Throwing off his shirt again and getting into the bed made his joints ache. He’d been spending too much time sitting around but it was the only thing he could do right now. Without Del, without his soulmate, nothing held any spark like it used to. Sleeping was the best and easiest option. But he’d been napping all day, not to mention last night, and he just couldn’t fall asleep. He tossed and turned for at least 30 minutes before giving up and turning on the TV. He idly stared at the screen, not really caring what was on. Even when the room began to get dark as the sun went down Russel couldn’t be bothered to get up and turn the light on. He wished he wasn’t alone.

Hours passed, and he must have dozed off at one point because when he was awoken by a soft knocking at his door, the room was pitch black. The drummer blinked tiredly as he sat up and stumbled over to the door. It was most likely Noodle coming to check up on him as she so often did since he’d gotten back. She was really a lot more perceptive than any of them gave her credit for. Instead, he was surprised to see 2D standing there, still just as hunched up and defeated as he’d been when Russel had last seen him.

“Hey Russ,” the singer said, looking at the floor. Russel opened the door further and crossed his arms, still drowsy.

“Hey D, what’s up?” 2D was staring at the ground, arms clasped in front of him. Russel could tell he’d been crying based on the redness of the singer’s cheeks and how mussed-up his hair was. It was a sad sight, and the drummer felt bad for not trying to comfort him more earlier.

2D looked up briefly, then back down. “Uh, nothin’. Jus’ wanted to see if you still wanted to watch somethin’ with me?” Russel noted the way the singer cringed at his own hoarse voice.

“Sure, I was just about to put something on. Come in.” Russel didn’t often let the others inside his room, but with 2D looking so fragile he figured it would be for the best. Murdoc could still be out there, skulking about and ready to cause trouble. The drummer moved aside and gestured for 2D to come in. The singer did so slowly and unsurely, probably realizing this was the first time he’d been in Russel’s room since they all got back together.

“Were you sleepin’?” he asks, sitting at the foot of the bed and looking over the drummer’s DVD collection. “I didn’t mean to wake you up.”

After throwing his shirt back on Russel sat as well, leaving a few inches between him and the singer. “No, I’ve been awake. Could use a distraction.”

“Is somethin’ wrong?” Damn, he’d forgotten that 2D could be perceptive when he wanted to be as well. No one ever gave much thought to 2D, and he was often written-off as a singing savant, incapable of anything else. But in reality, the singer was kind and a good friend, and a little bit of a troublemaker, in the right setting.

Russel took a deep breath, then let it out slowly. “I’ve been thinkin’ about Del a lot…” He didn't’ need to say more. 2D understood. When Russel had come back to Kong looking half-dead and then spent a full week locked in his room, they’d all assumed something went bad. Later he’d explained about Del, about the exorcism, and that had been that.

“I’m sorry Russ, I know he was important to you,” 2D said, turning to face him. “You and him were… ah…”

“We were soulmates, yeah.” Just talking about it hurt so bad. It was a wound that would never heal or scab over, no matter how much time passed.

2D popped in a DVD and then shuffled back to rest against the wall, his long legs dangling over the edge of the bed. “Shit Russ, I-I didn’t know you two were--” The singer made an awkward motion with his hands, but luckily Russel understood.

“Yeah… since back in high school. He was…” Russel didn’t know what else to say. He felt his throat beginning to close up and his eyes start to sting. Embarrassed, he turned away from 2D to hide his reaction.

“He talked about you a lot, you know,” 2D said out of the blue. Russel snapped his head over to the singer, eyes wide and very alert.

“He did?” He knew Del came out when he was asleep, but not that he’d talked with the band much outside practises. Sure, he’d been especially fond of Noodle, offering to play video games with her when Russel was napping on the sofa, but that was all Russel thought it’d been. “What’d he say?”

“Oh, lotsa stuff. Like how you first met, or what you were like in secondary school. He liked to tell me abou’ you the most.” Russel continued to stare in shock at 2D continued. “It was kinda funny, really, how he’d go on and on abou’ you.”

Russel felt himself begin to sweat, an ugly churning starting in his belly. “He never told me.”

2D threw his hands up. “Oh, it wasn’t an everyday thing. Maybe jus’ a few times. He really loved you, I think.” The drummer sat, speechless for a few seconds before 2D seemed to notice. “O-oh, I shouldn’ta been talkin’ about him. I probably made you upset,” 2D stuttered, waving his hands like he was waving away a bad smell. It was kind of adorable, how he panicked. “Sorry, I don’t always think before I say things.”

Russel cleared his throat before answering. “It’s OK, it’s kinda nice actually. Talkin’ about him to someone who knew him.” He stared down at his hands, the TV forgotten. “Sometimes it’s like he never existed, then I remember…”

Suddenly 2D was much closer than before, pressing up against Russel’s side and leaning his head on the drummer’s shoulder. “I’m sorry Russ. I didn’t know him that well but he was a good guy and a great rapper.”

Russel felt his eyes begin to water and his throat closing. He never cried unless it was about Del, and even then he always did that in private. But 2D was right there, being so open and honest and completely unlike anyone else Russel knew. The singer was a special breed, unflinchingly real at all times. It was refreshing.

“Thank D, I mean it.” Beside him 2D blushed and scratched the back of his head, leaning away from Russel again. Russel missed the other’s warmth almost immediately. How long had it been since he’d been close with another person?

“Y-yeah, well. You’re my mate Russ.” 2D shot him a shaky smile, one of his real ones and not the fake kind from earlier. He remembered the way 2D had looked when he’d answered the door and felt a pang of worry.

“You too, man. You’re a good friend.” 2D laughed and punched Russel in the shoulder, barely hard enough for the drummer to even feel it. Russel knew 2D was stronger than that but probably didn’t want to startle him too badly. “You good after that shit with Murdoc this morning?”

The effect on 2D was immediate. His eyes widened, then began to dart around the room while his arms came up to wrap around himself. “I-I guess. He jus’ does this every time. Blokes, birds, it doesn’t matter. They all want him more than me…”

So he was still upset. Russel nudged his shoulder against the singer, jostling him enough that he had to look up. “D, Murdoc is nasty. If those guys and girls all went to him instead they’ve got a problem, not you.”

2D sniffled a little and wiped his eye with the corner of hs sleeve. “I know, but it still hurts…”

Russel knew 2D was a physical type of person, and even though he wasn’t personally he decided to put aside his usual misgivings and wrap an arm around the singer’s shoulders. 2D immediately turned toward him and reciprocated the hold, throwing his arms around the drummer's shoulders and leaning in. Russel stiffened for just a second before relaxing again; the other man was surprisingly warm, if not a little bit pointy in the elbows. While 2D sniffled and burrowed his face into Russel’s t-shirt, the drummer rubbed his back, silently enjoying being close to someone living for once.

“S-sorry,” 2D said, wiping his eyes on his sleeve again and moving to let go of Russel. “Fuck, I-I got your shirt all wet.”

Russel shrugged. “It’s fine, really, D. You, uh, you been holdin’ that in for a while?” The singer shrugged noncommittally, rubbing his temples with long fingers.

“I think so. Probably since Paula.” They never did really talk about the Paula Incident. Russel had broken Murdoc’s nose and 2D had eventually moved on, or so he’d thought. He probably should have checked in with the singer more often, but he’d been so busy with the album, and then Del; he’d just never had the time. Or the energy, since coming back. The familiar sourness of guilt coiled in the drummers gut as he watched 2D calm down. He could have been a much better friend to the man.

“You coulda said somethin’.” Did that sound judgy? Why was Russel suddenly getting to worked up over this? Was it the weird, half-hug they were lingering in, or the distractingly loud commercials playing on the TV? “No, I mean, I shoulda asked.”

2D watched as Russel stumbled over himself, making the drummer even more flustered. It had to be the lack of sleep making him act weird, Russel justified as he tried to chill out. Still, 2D was staring at him with a strange sort of blank expression on his face. It made Russel squirm.

“What?” he asked, thinking that maybe the singer had just spaced out again.

“Nothin’. Jus’... I’m glad to know you, Russ. You’re a good guy,” 2D said simply. Like he wasn’t being incredibly--and slightly uncomfortably--bare and honest right then. That was just how the singer was, but Russel had forgotten in their time apart.

He’s not sure if he’s supposed to thank 2D for saying that so he stays quiet, silently appraising the younger man. Sometimes while Russel had been freaking out they’d gotten even closer, barely a rulers width between them. It occurred to him that it would take barely any effort to close the gap and press his lips to 2D’s. To Russel’s sleep-deprived brain, that sounded like a good way to thank the singer. He didn’t even think that maybe it would be a little out of left field, he just went for it.

A few seconds of soft lips against his, then Russel came to his senses. Holy shit, he hadn’t thought this through at all. 2D probably wasn't interested in him, not to mention Russel wasn’t sure if he was either. It had just kind of… happened. He was about to pull away and apologize profusely when he felt the barest of movement from 2D, just a slight twitch of the lips and a hand landing softly on his knee. Was 2D kissing him back?

Russel steeled himself and leaned in, deepening the kiss by placing one of his hands on 2D’s back and pressing him forward. The singer let out a barely-there gasp but it must have been a sign of happiness because then he shyly peaked his tongue out to swipe over Russel’s bottom lip. It felt like electric sparks travelling out from the places where they touched, and Russel obediently opened his mouth to give 2D more space. They were really making out now, hands pulling and grabbing without any real plan. Russel felt himself start to get carried away in the moment and forced himself to slow down, separating their bodies enough that he could breathe again.

“Shit,” he growled, still panting from their kisses. “I didn’t mean to--”

But apparently, 2D didn’t care. “Why’d you stop?” he whined, shimmying even closer. “Don’t wanna stop Russ.”

And oh it’d be so easy to give in to the singer right then wit his big doe eyes and pouty lips but Russel neede to make sure. “This isn’t some way to get back at Murdoc, is it? Or a rebound, cause I don’t think I can deal with the shit D.” Nevermind the fact that part of Russel’s brain was screaming that he was betraying Del, just like it always did whenever he met someone new, despite the fact Del had told him he wanted him to be happy. It was a little less with 2D, and Russel hoped that was a good sign.

“Murdoc? No! I-I jus’--you’re always so nice t’me, to everyone.” Russel felt his hopes drop.

“You don’t owe me anythin’ for being nice 2D,” he murmured, wanting to let the younger down softly. “You just think you do 'cause of everthin’ that’s happened.”

That must have been the wrong thing to say, because 2D shot back, looking Russel dead in the eye with an angry expression. “Don’t tell me what to think! E-everybody does that and--well I like you, Russ! Even before today!”

Well, that was a bit of a surprise. Russel couldn’t think of a single time when he could have been suspicious. Probably because he spent most of his time in a haze of depression and exhaustion. It wouldn’t have been hard for him to miss things, which is apparently exactly the case.

“Oh.” Now what? Russel’s brain was working rapidly trying to figure out where they were supposed to go from here. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to tell you your own business. I just--I don’t really know what’s goin’ on here.”

2D looked confused as well before a warm smile broke out on his face. “Well, we were watchin’ TV, and then we kissed a little. We can forget abou’ the cryin’ bit, if you wanna.” He winked and Russel couldn’t help but respond a small, nervous laugh.

“That’s not exactly what I was talkin’ about.” 2D giggled and laid his head on Russel’s shoulder. The drummer could feel his heart hammering in his chest at just that gentle contact. Maybe it was fine though, they could talk about whatever this was later and just relax for a bit. When was the last time he’d actually enjoyed the fact he had nothing to do? “Fine, we can keep watchin’ the movie and talk later.”

“Can we restart it? Somebody made me miss most of the first half,” 2D teased, already getting up to reset the DVD. Russel laughed, honest to goodness laughed at the singer’s innocent request.

“Of course D, anythin’ you want. Maybe I could go get some snacks?” God, he felt so much lighter than he had in ages. 2D nodded his enthusiastic agreement so Russel pulled himself up off the bed and headed for the kitchen. He passed a very drunk, very cross Murdoc in the hall but didn’t even give him a second thought. For once he was feeling a little bit like he used to, and he wasn’t going to let Murdoc of all people ruin that.

Snacks procured, Russel went back to the bedroom where he noticed the lights were out. Stepping inside he saw 2D getting comfy under the bedsheets, piling up pillows and snuggling in. The drummer set the snacks on the bed and joined in, this time not hesitating when their shoulders touched. In fact, Russel was feeling so bold that as he got settled he threw an arm around the back on 2D’s shoulders. The singer took the bait and shuffled closer, just like they had been before the kiss. To anyone outside it probably looked a little weird, the two bandmates cuddling like lovers, but to Russel, it was the start of something new and exciting. He just hoped Del was happy with him, wherever he was.

#2russ #fanfic

[hashtagsmitty]

Smitty's Thailand Adventure - Day 2

Big day. My phone is saying 27000 steps. The highlights include getting a suit tailored, having a thai woman rub my naked body down for an hour, meeting Keith Urban's green beret brother, and a friendly, spirited discussion about Islam. No spoilerinos though!

I didn't sleep well, the bed was way too hard and the springs jabbed me all night. I'd told Josh 10am but I was up at 6. I read some more of "Growth Mindset" - talking about sports stars and CEOs that had fixed mindsets vs those with growth mindsets.

Josh texted me and said that he was going to meet me at 11 because he didn't sleep well, so I went out exploring. I got turned around a few times trying to find the train station on the main road. Think a giant freeway overpass with four train lines on it, and a huge station connecting them all. This one has two mega shopping centers like the Emporium attached. It didn't open until 10, so I went for a walk in the park instead.

There were heaps of people just doing normal park stuff - walking, exercising. I saw a couple kids practicing punches. There was an old woman cutting a hedge, and most of the park was well maintained - except for a set of steps I found. They were leading to a jetty that jutted out over the lake in the middle of the park, and the steps leading down were covered in bird poo. It was weird seeing the juxtaposition. There's another one in this picture I took yesterday:

I really liked the architecture of this building, and it was odd to see the rats nest of phone cabling framed in front of it. That wasn't even the worst one. It highlighted something we saw quite a bit of - lowest possible effort to look good.

I walked around the park for a while, then grabbed some food from the White Family Mart on the corner of my street. The name jumped out at me. I grabbed some godawful dried strawberries and a rice and grilled chicken packet that was way better than I expected.

Josh texted me, so I left the hotel and went back to the Emporium and walked around a bit. There was this cool shop called Another Man Story with unique custom men's accessories. Some of the stuff was cool, but it struck me as a desperate attempt at buying individuality through conformity. "Look at these unique expressions of you that anyone with enough money can buy!"

Says the guy with too many stupid expensive leather jackets.

I was looking at my leather bracelet that I made myself for like $5, and compared it to these bracelets that cost hundreds. I like mine better because I made it and it has meaning to me.

I met up with Josh eventually and we got some pad thai in the food court. I'd never had it before, and it was pretty good. I've always been a picky eater, so eating new shit is a bit outside my comfort zone and I'm proud of the small steps I'm taking.

After brunch(?) we went to a tailor Josh knew, in the first of many trips across the city. We took the skytrain - it cost about a dollar per trip. We needed to change train then walk a bit. I was boggled at how well Josh knows the city, and again reminded how screwed I'd be if I wanted to do any of this shit without him.

The tailor was cool - spoke English, very business-oriented. I ordered a 3-piece suit in grey wool, and two white shirts. It'll be ready the day before I leave.

We left the tailor after Josh finished texting one of his friends - something about organizing a business together. Josh had many words to say about this guy, and the tailor, and anyone who walked slowly...

After the tailor Josh wanted to check out a market to get ties and cuff links. I told him I'd look at one market - we went to Cambodia together a few years back, and I got burned out walking from market to market trying to save 3 dollars on some bag. He led us on a crazy whirlwind tour of the backroads and skywalks across Bangkok, until eventually we ended up at the same market we'd gone to last time we were here!

It was a sprawling shopping centre, with as many stalls crammed in as the fire code would allow. Josh described it as "an inside market with air conditioning." We wandered around looking at shirts for a while until we found the ties and cuffs place. I hemmed and hawwed for a while until I picked out a tie and some cuffs. The tie looks awesome - it's skinny and red.

We left the market and took the winding route back to a different mall - we had some meat and rice dish. Josh told me that beef in Thai was "moo". I called bullshit. The menu had "grilled beef/pork/chicken" on it. When we ordered, Josh pointed at that item and said "moo". The waiter nodded. I grabbed Google Translate and typed in moo - it came up as "swine". Sure enough, the waiter brought out pork.

As we ate, Josh told me the plan for tonight - I needed a haircut, so we planned to walk into a place near his AirBNB. We planned on meeting up with his friends for drinks and a meal, right around the corner from his place. And, I'd expressed that I wanted a massage. So the plan was dump my bag at the hotel, find a massage, get a haircut, then meet his friends for dinner.

Another quick train ride. The thing they don't tell you about the skyrail is that you gotta climb stairs to get on and off each time.

I dumped my bag. Josh warned me about the massage girls outside my hotel, and again, they disappointed by not heckling me.

We tried a couple of massage places near my hotel - the two non-dodgy ones near my hotel, anyway, ones that didn't advertise "Vip Room", "4 Hands Massage", or God forbid "Teen Love". If you need to emphasize that your "masseuses" are teenagers, you're not an establishment I'm keen to visit.

The two non-dodgy ones near the hotel were full. We caught the skytrain again, this time to near Josh's house. We found a massage place that looked OK and went inside.

We had to take off our shoes to go inside. I was wearing blundies that slipped off, and Josh had some sneaker things. I waited awkwardly inside after telling the lady that my friend was coming and he spoke Thai. Josh came in and asked for a massage for each of us, in English. Bastard.

We got led into a cubicle each. Shower curtain walls, a very small cot. I sat down and my masseuse walked in. She was a middle-aged Thai woman. She dropped down under the cot and pulled out a basket, then said "leave your underpants on" and left. I took off everything except my underpants and sat cross legged on the cot. I was nervous. What if she touched something I didn't want touched? What if I reacted in a way I wasn't comfortable reacting? I did some deep breathing while I waited.

My masseuse came back. She said "lay down, back first." I lay down on my back. She said "no, back first!" I rolled back over onto my tummy. She covered my back with a towel, then unrolled the towel down to my underpants. She oiled her hands and started rubbing my back. It was nice - Thai massage is firm, more of a deep tissue massage than relaxation. She worked her way across my back, my legs, then my chest. There was a weird one where she raised one of my legs into a bent position, foot flat, and pressed it down into the other leg. It felt like my balls were getting squished in a sandwich press. Clearly, these techniques were designed for Asian men.

She finished with a neck and head massage. She couldn't speak English, but she communicated humour in other ways - she started rubbing my neck and flicked the weird lump on the side that I have. I wondered how to say "misformed conjoined twin" in Thai, which led to a mental rabbit hole about Siamese twins and whether it was a faux pas to talk about that in Siam. She massaged my scalp and flicked my quiff, then spent time straightening my hair when she finished.

I rate the massage a solid 5/7 - staring at a bare stone wall while an Asian woman grinds her elbow into my spine isn't necessarily my thing, but it was an experience and I'm glad I did it. I'm also glad none of the things I was worried about happened.

While we were putting our shoes back on outside, a sketchy white dude walked up to us. He commented on Josh's shoes and stretched his hand out to me to shake. I shook. He asked where we were from. I said Australia. He said his brother came from New Zealand and that we'd know his name. I said I'm sure I don't. He said his brother's name was Keith Urban and that his name was Greg. I said that I knew his brothers name. He said that he used to be a green beret and asked me to rate his handshake. He did his left hand, then without letting go did the right hand. I said his shake was firm. He said the green beret thing again and twisted my thumbs around. Then he wished us a good night and walked off.

We shrugged and walked on down the road towards the barber. We bumped into Greg Urban again - he commented, and asked where we were going. I said we were getting a haircut. He said "you need one!" I said "thank you!" He said "you need one because you look like shit." We kinda just walked off a bit faster. Both me and Josh were getting major sketchy vibes. Josh compared it to a foreign 5 year old who can speak fluent English walking up to you and talking to you - a distraction for something more sinister.

We kept walking. The barber was in Josh's area. He decided that he was going to show me all the street animals he was friends with. We had to cross another skybridge to get there. As we walked across this one, there was a dude laying down covering half the bridge. Josh said we should go single file. As we walked, the dude sat bolt upright. It felt like something out of a zombie movie and I almost sprinted off. Josh later explained that he was likely an opium addict, and likely at rock bottom because of it.

We walked to the barber. They were super full, so we booked in for tomorrow at 3. My fade needs a touch up. We left, and Josh started pointing out his dog and cat friends. He called them all cutesy names in Spanish, like gordo (fatso) or nino (little boy) or chico (little guy). It was weird to see this super intense friend of mine, fiercely competent and ruthless in business and his personal lives, acting like a kid in a candy store with these street animals. It was a weird juxtaposition, but it definitely humanised him a bit more. The animals were really cute too.

We sat down in W District, an outdoor dining and bar area. Josh ordered us some ribs and chips and we waited for his friend and business partner to arrive. Josh had been texting him all day about their planned business venture. Josh wanted his friend to pick one idea, develop it, and pay Josh to implement it. Josh's friend wanted to develop a whole bunch of ideas at once, and give Josh equity in his company and a place to stay in exchange. His friend was arriving early to negotiate.

Josh had been talking up the ribs all day - he said he should get a commission from the ribs lady for all the business he drove to her. They had a chat, and she agreed to send out 3 things of ribs ASAP.

Bill, Josh's friend, arrived. They negotiated while I listened. I wasn't following everything, but I asked Josh later and he said he got what he wanted. As we talked, more and more people showed up, and Josh introduced me to some of his other friends. His current girlfriend, his Egyptian friend who hates Islam, friends of friends. A Thai girl named Ben - that threw me a bit, let me tell you.

I spent the night mingling. I don't normally hang out in large groups, and definitely not with people I don't know, and rarely around people who are drinking. Further outside the comfort zone, I guess. I put aside my nerves and chatted to people, drawing on my inner extrovert. I played improvisation games with Josh and Bill. I talked about Islam with the Egyptian guy. I did my best to make myself, if not the life and soul of the party, at least a net gain to the gathering.

The ribs arrived after 2 hours of waiting. Bill and I joked about Josh's failed celebrity status. They gave us some plastic gloves to eat the ribs with. The group ordered tower after tower of beer - portable taps with 3 Liters of beer inside. They cost 650 baht, around $25.

I ended up staying way longer than I expected, and headed home around 11. Josh walked me to the station and we talked about expectation and visualization and the universe providing and the great magnet turning. We made plans for the haircut tomorrow, as well as lunch with his current girlfriend and dinner with the same group as tonight. Bill said that he was definitely going because I said I was.

I walked past the"massage parlor" again on the way home, still no harrassment.