#I stand by that thing about Yo Han bottoming btw

[amethystina]

hello dear, hope you're doing well physically & mentally. lots of hugs for you!

i've been wondering about the physical touch in Gahan's dynamic especially. we all know how much physical abuse Yohan has gone through in his childhood, the kidnapping by Sunah, him willingly explode a whole ass room with bombs with him inside it too but pushing away his loved one out.

now compare to Gaon. this Bambi has better experience with physical touch in his life seeing as how he's comfortable leaning to Soohyun seeking comfort while grieving for the loss of his parents. reaching out to Yohan so easily when he sees Yohan woke up from a nightmare. how he reaches for Kkomi and put her on his lap, the lovely and respectful interaction with Elijah.

I always have this thought in my head that it would be tricky for them to have this physical touch without one misunderstood the meaning of one's action. personally i bounced back and forth of the idea Yohan can manipulate and charm ppl with his sex prowess. just because he knows being seduction and sex goes hand in hand with manipulation. It does seem like Yohan can be the type to do especially that the way he gazes at Gaon & Sunah. But we all know he has brother complex lol, while with Sunah he can get the rush of feeling powerful having someone around his level to play with. Either that idea or I think Yohan never has the chance to explore sex bcs it's too much physical touches and too much emotional investment in such a short period of time. Perhaps he can have sex while his sex partner is tied up, not touching Yohan but he's the one who has control to touch them, hence why the kinky dom Yohan exist. So i think domestic touches will be like taming stray or feral creatures. It would take a long time and patience on both sides to be in the safe space and trust.

now.. wdyt Gahan would be in if they were already in a romantic relationship. How would they interact? Who would initiate what? What difference would it be for them in domestic/ innocent interactions and in bed? I would like to know your thoughts on this one. I wish I can pour my detailed thoughts for this but i'm afraid to scare you off with my long-ass paragraphs hahaha it's been a while since I have conversations analyzing character's personality and their depths, just geeking out about them and it can be intense and intimidating for people if I pour all my thoughts out for these shit lol

I wish you well! Take your time on your recovery & in writing, we'll always be here for you!

I'm currently in pain from shoveling too much snow but, other than that, I'm pretty okay. Thank you for asking 💜

Physical touch is a very fascinating subject when it comes to these two, isn't it? Probably because there's so much tension between them.

Anyhow! I actually think that Yo Han has had a lot of sex but, like, only with the right people? He may have been abused as a child (and definitely has trauma and trust issues because of it) but he's also a very clever and intuitive man. And he'd know how to find partners he can have casual, enthusiastic, and fun sex with. Like, some random woman or man he meets at a bar who thinks he's hot? Definitely. Some random woman or man he meets in a professional setting who is clearly trying to gain something from having sex with him? Absolutely not.

Having sex is a very intimate act in some ways, but exactly how intimate depends a lot on the partner, the setting, and the circumstances. Yo Han would only go for people he's not feeling threatened by or knows he can control without exerting too much effort. But I also think he'd enjoy the challenge of wooing people. Like, how fast can he make this woman shed her clothes? What should he say to make this man swoon? Flirting would be a game for him, too, but "winning" just means he and the other person get to have sex so it's actually pretty harmless.

And I think he'd be fine doing it with strangers and letting them touch him. Because he doesn't actually seem averse to touch in the drama? Unused to it, yes — especially the tender kind — but not scared of or uncomfortable with it. He puts himself and his body through a lot, yes, but never in a reckless or self-destructive way. More often than not, he knows exactly what the risks are and deems them worth whatever payoff comes at the end (unlike Ga On who just... throws himself into danger without much thought).

One of the few (if not the only time) Yo Han seems genuinely scared of physical touch is when Ga On tries to comfort him after his nightmare. Which says a lot, I think. He's more scared of a touch meant to soothe than one meant to hurt, since he doesn't want to show weakness. He doesn't know how he will react to a touch like that and would therefore rather push it away.

But he doesn't even flinch when Sun Ah raises a hand to slap him, which is definitely a situation where some (but not all) who have been abused in the past would react. So, clearly, he's not as traumatised as he could have been, or has learned to control it enough for it not to show too much. To me, Yo Han doesn't seem averse to casual touching and does it quite a lot himself, like towing Ga On around at the gala, lightly patting Lawyer Ko's arm, offering his arm to Jin Joo at the other gala etc.

And I personally don't think there will be all that many misunderstandings between him and Ga On as to what a certain touch means? They both seem way too smart for that? There might still be general misunderstandings, of course, but not when it comes to that. If nothing else, the intent behind touches is something Yo Han had to learn long ago because you can't manipulate people only using sexual prowess. He needs more than one method and that means recognising what different touches mean, when to give them etc.

My personal headcanon for Yo Han is that he has no trouble using his sex appeal to manipulate when appropriate, but his strength lies in how he adapts to the situation, sometimes being kind and understanding, sometimes being firm and commanding, and, sometimes, being flirty and sensual.

The way he prefers to have sex is for fun, though, and he enjoys it a lot with the right people. But he'd never do it if he felt uncomfortable or threatened by his partner, and he's good enough at reading people that he'd know the other person's intentions long before the actual sex happens. So, for example, I don't think he'd ever want to have sex with Sun Ah even if he could tie her up. He'd be too suspicious to actually enjoy it xD

To me, Yo Han is the kind of man who has a lot of trauma, but has also worked a lot on overcoming said trauma. If he did so in a healthy way I will leave unsaid, but I don't think he'd allow himself to be wary of other people's touch. I think Yo Han would be frustrated by his own limitations if he could only have sex with people while they're tied up, simply because he's uncomfortable with them touching him. That's too big of a weakness — something someone could exploit. And he'd train that out of himself as soon as possible. His whole thing is that he's unshakeable and impenetrable and that's a choice — something he's putting effort into being. And so I, personally, can't see him allowing himself to have that kind of "flaw."

As a friend of mine said: "He's a man even more in control of himself than he is others."

That said, I think he enjoys tying people up because it gives him added control and makes it more fun to play with his victims partners. So I'm all for Dom!Yo Han — he is one in every fic I've written so far — I just think he does that because he likes it, not because it's the only way he can have sex.

And, to be entirely honest with you? I don't think Yo Han needs to tie people up in order to control them in the bedroom. I'm pretty sure that man can make his partners do pretty much anything he wants them to, without using a single tool or restraint. Because that is the kind of Dom he is.

ANYHOW. To your questions! (boy did I get derailed there for a while)

Ga On is definitely the cuddly one. Like, once he gets comfortable, he's the one who gives and asks for hugs, will walk up behind Yo Han and wrap his arms around him, snuggle up on the couch, put his head in Yo Han's lap etc. Because I definitely agree with you that the casual, domestic touches will be more difficult for Yo Han. He's used to giving some of them, like pats on the shoulder, a supportive hand, fixing Ga On's clothes — practical things. But the ones that are just because? Clearly, that's out of his wheelhouse and he's too prideful to ask for them.

Again, not because he's broken, scared, or doesn't understand them, but simply because he's not used to them. And he doesn't like feeling insecure or appearing weak, so he wouldn't risk asking and making a mistake.

So it'll fall upon Ga On to offer them, which he of course does. He's a pretty physical person with the people he trusts, provided that politeness and such allows it. Like, clearly, one of the reasons why Ga On doesn't touch Yo Han much in the drama is due to the workplace hierarchy, the fact that Yo Han is older (and it's considered rude to touch someone older without their permission), and just Yo Han's overall... Yo Han-ness. But once Ga On gets free rein?

Yo Han won't know what hit him.

But it'll take time for them to get used to it, yes. Like, just teaching Yo Han how to return casual hugs that aren't in a life-or-death situation is going to take a while. But he'll get used to it eventually and while I don't think he'll ever be the one to initiate certain things — like the more cuddly hugs that might make him look clingy — he'd always reciprocate when Ga On does.

Yo Han is a little too prideful to ask for cuddles, but he'll graciously agree to them when Ga On asks him to give them.

(He and Komi have that in common, I guess)

As for sex, that depends? I think they can both initiate it, but Yo Han enjoys it more when Ga On does so, just because he likes seeing Ga On horny and desperate xD Yo Han is definitely the one in charge, though. That's not to say that Ga On can't snatch control from him or throw him off-balance from time to time, but probably only during brief moments when he's being particularly cheeky and bratty. I think they both enjoy the push-and-pull — the fact that Ga On challenges Yo Han is a part of the thrill — but are more comfortable when Yo Han is in control.

Especially since Yo Han is very good at it.

All that said, I do think — and this might be an unpopular and scandalous opinion — that Yo Han could, eventually, let Ga On top him. But we're talking years down the line, when they're so comfortable with each other that there are no secrets or doubts. Because, yes, Yo Han is a man who prides himself on having control but, eventually, he's also going to realise that having control and having power isn't necessarily the same thing. And being in charge and having control isn't necessarily the same thing, either. Ga On has a tremendous amount of power over Yo Han despite not being in charge or in control the majority of the time.

I mean, there's a reason why they say that the sub is the one with the real power since they're the ones willingly handing it over to someone else. And if they can give it, they can also revoke that privilege — and there is absolutely nothing the Dom can do about that. In that situation, the Dom is, quite literally, powerless.

And I think, especially as he gets older and softer, Yo Han would realize that trusting Ga On to top him is, in fact, a sign of his own strength. And I don't mean that in a "real men know how to bottom" kind of way. But in a "I love this man and I trust him and myself enough to let him have this power over me because that, in itself, means I have power."

But, again, that's several years into their relationship and 99,9% of the time, Yo Han is the one topping. But, every once in a while, Ga On can be the one in charge. As a treat.

... I may have gotten off track again.

But I'd say that's about the gist of it? There are, of course, more specific examples and details, too.

Yo Han is definitely the one doing most of the dirty talk, but Ga On will not hesitate to use his doe-eyes to his advantage and say the most kinky, outrageous things sometimes, just for the pleasure of watching Yo Han bluescreen. I also think that Yo Han will develop a habit of burrowing his nose in Ga On's hair when they're hugging/cuddling. And, as I've mentioned in a previous post, Yo Han is the little spoon 90% of the time. I also think that Ga On is going to be pretty shy and prudish when it comes to talking about sex and anything relating to it (at least at the beginning), but kinky as fuck when it comes to the actual acts. Like, he can't say "cock" without wincing, but he'll gladly let Yo Han tie him up and fuck him so roughly and thoroughly he's covered in bruises afterwards.

I really could go on but then we'd be here forever and I have work tomorrow x'D

So I'm hoping you got something out of this long rant! Thank you so much for the ask! I admit that I don't often spend time thinking about fictional characters' sex lives, but I apparently have a lot of opinions regardless. Though, to be honest, I think Yo Han and Ga On is the couple where I've had to think about it the most, since physical closeness (of both the sexual and more innocent kind) is extremely important for their dynamic. So yeah.

Take care, darling! 💜

#Amethystina Replies #fr-wiwiw #I genuinely had to think on this one for a while before I was able to answer #A lot of things are already stored in my brain somewhere #But the tricky part is formulating it into a somewhat coherent reply #And I still don't know if I managed #I always feel like I forget so many details and aspects x'D #I stand by that thing about Yo Han bottoming btw #I think that would be wonderful character development for him #To eventually be able to trust someone that much #And you KNOW Ga On would be amazingly considerate #So yeah #That's my headcanon #And you can pry it from my cold dead hands