#In india where the ratio of mhps to patients are less I WANNA DO MY BEST

[i-got-the-feels]

"My brother has been an anchor around my entire life. Even before he got sick and cut his hand off. An anchor. Pulling me down. You know what I get? The rope that helps me get enough surface to breathe. You know I used to think Id run away from him. I'd cut the cord. But here I am 40 years old still in the nuthouse and running interference. I get it. I get it. I fucking get it. He is my curse. "

- Dominick Birdsey, I Know This Much Is True

#i know this much is true #Fuck this shit is so right #I am so emotional #This THIS this is what it can feel like to live with someone who jas mental illness #This is what caregiver burn out is #And fuck it sucks more when you are a child #I GET DOMINICK #I am someone who had to parent my parents #I had to be responsible for the emotional climate of the house #I had to stop fights #God but life doesn't stop there right? #You get your own shit #Your own failures rejections insecurities and well yeah you end up with depression and anxiety on your own #I think this is why my career matters so much to people #I want to study more and become a clinical psychologist so that I can work in hospitals #In india where the ratio of mhps to patients are less I WANNA DO MY BEST #And yes its a little selfish maybe but I KNOW i am capable of being more than a psychologist #I KNOW I CAN HELP MORE #I just hope i get to do it and get out of the house #Fuck i am so emotional now #feels rants #Why my career matters so much to me*