#UP at me for like 3 days straight for trying to be ‘labelist’ about him and for caring about sexuality and ‘policing’ his / her language and

[pepprs]

kind of amazing that i get down on myself for having impostor syndrome and feeling constantly stupid and naive and radiating insecurity about being young all the time when actually there is a completely explainable reason for it which is that i live in this house 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

#groaning and laughing over liz memes with my siblings and explaining to my parents why ppl are doing this / why ppl hate her and #are celebrating her death and they start attacking me for relaying the information (and agreeing with it ♥️) and saying shit like This #Generation has no respect and are so cruel and classless and always pick at problems for no reason and make unfounded baseless claims when I #was literally reading them evidence of the awful things that happened under her reign and they were going i don’t believe that. LMFAO! ok. #and the generational disdain has been such an issue too. like our parents straight up think we are stupid! love and light 💖 #purrs #one of the worst fights i ever had with my mom that was the reason i started going to counseling happened bc of how jason mraz announced #that he was two-spirit and i was talking to my mom about it and said that he shouldn’t have called himself that bc he&: white and she BLEW #UP at me for like 3 days straight for trying to be ‘labelist’ about him and for caring about sexuality and ‘policing’ his / her language and #she literally went out of her way to pick a fight with someone on ig who was saying the thing i was to prove a point to me and she said othe #other extremely hurtful things about me being bi and about me having the audacity to ‘root for the underdog’ and how she was going to cut me #out of her life just like she did with her aunt because i push her buttons too much so ♥️ always very fun to get into debates with my parent #and i know it goes against literally everything i am supposed to know / be for me to be arguing like this and to be complaining about it and #even joking about queen elizabeth but like. idk. i feel so torn between how i feel. i know she was a human being yeah yeah but she was #also a colonialist monarch parasite and i genuinely think the way tumblr explodes when politicians and world leaders die is endearing and #exciting and funny. i adore my job and my colleagues and also working full time is killing me. i recognize that my parents are human beings #and that i am flawed and don’t know everything and am saying stuff without fully knowing what it means and also it makes me giddy to pick #fights with them a little bit. i am kind of a bad person i think and i care about it so much but also i don’t give a fuck anymore. nothing #in my life feels real rn and i am a scared creature in my skin all the time. so no i don’t feel like i can hold my own and represent my work #well because i am living a double life just wanting to play video games all the time and run away from everything but also wanting to create #the golden thing and help people open the door to a better world or whatever and i can’t tell wha ti want to do more because im fucking #EXHAUSTED and experiencing 15 kinds of despair at all times lol! #not to turn a post about queen elizabeth into a vent lmfao but i am so angry. it really fucking gets me that they think im stupid lol. like #i know im stupid for other reasons but it’s not fair to think im stupid because i am pointing out inequities and trying to help you learn or #whatever and it’s not fair that you think that im stupid because im a young person like im literally your fucking daughter and it is made st #STAGGERINGLY clear to me every day how you only wanted babies and you didn’t want us as the messy growing learning imperfectncomplicated #adults we are becoming and it fucking hurts and i hate you for it a little bit. lol 🤸🏻‍♀️ #delete later #idk what i even just typed i an just hitting post and letting the consequences roll in. im a bad person fuck it! #parents tw