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#adoption only through woman and child welfare department only
jonsa101 · 3 years
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Max Goodwin and Randall Pearson: The Well-Meaning, Incredibly Self-Centered Leading Men We’ve Grown to Love.
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Hey fam! Like I said, I’ve been writing a ton of meta lately and this is another one that’s just been sitting in my drafts. It’s basically a This Is Us and a New Amsterdam meta which is something I haven’t done before but something I want do more of. In my Game of Thrones days I used to write a lot of meta about shows and characters that had similarities so this is fun for me. I hope y’all enjoy this. ALSO THIS HAS SPOILERS FOR BOTH SHOWS!!!!!!!
Without a doubt the two most popular shows on NBC is This is Us and New Amsterdam. And what’s not to love? They’re both emotionally driven, heartfelt, shows that focus on incredibly deep and complex topics. Though one show focuses on family dynamics and the other focuses on the healthcare system, these shows are very similar in more ways than one. Case in point, Max Goodwin and Randall Pearson. The more I watch these two shows, the more I realize how these two characters are so alike!!! These two men are kind-hearted, well intentioned, individuals who genuinely want to make some sort of positive difference. They are incredibly ambitious and always have “bright ideas” and “goals” they want to accomplish and somehow they’re able to meet those goals without ever having to sacrifice their wants and needs. By every definition these men are the “main characters” or the ultimate “protagonists.” These are the folks that we are supposed to root for. At the same time, though these men have many traits to be admired, when you truly look at it both of them can be incredibly self centered and selfish especially when it pertains to their romantic partners and love interests. No matter how appealing you make these characters out to be these men clearly fall under the Behind Every Great Man trope.
The Behind Every Great Man trope has been used countless of times throughout Cinema and TV History that I’m sure that I don’t even have to explain it to you but for the sake of this meta this is how it’s defined.
“Behind Every Great Man...stands an even greater woman! Or in about a hundred variations is a Stock Phrase referring to how people rarely achieve greatness without support structures that go generally unappreciated, and said support structure is a traditionally female role via being the wife, mother, or sometimes another relation. This trope is specifically about a man who is credited with something important, but owes much of his success to the woman in his life.”
This trope usually has a negative connotation (and rightfully so) because the man who often benefits from this is an asshole and unworthy of this type of support!
For example:
Oliva and Fitz
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Cristina Yang and Burke
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Cookie and Lucious
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Ghost and Tasha
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There are countless others but these are a few of the couples that come to mind for me. Randall and Max aren’t comparable to any of these men that are listed above but they are still operating under the same trope. It just looks nicer because Max and Randall are inherently good and inspirational. They are the heroes of the story. I would even argue and say that both men fall under the Chronic Hero Syndrome trope which is defined as
“Chronic Hero Syndrome is an "affliction" of cleaner heroes where for them, every wrong within earshot must be righted, and everyone in need must be helped, preferably by Our Hero themself. While certainly admirable, this may have a few negative side-effects on the hero and those around them. Such heroes could wear themselves out in their attempts to help everyone or become distraught and blame themselves for the one time that they're unable to save the day. Spending so much time and effort saving everyone else can also put a strain on the hero's personal or dating life.”
Just because Max and Randall have these incredibly inspiring aspirations, is it fair that their wives and love interests are always expected to rise to the occasion and support them. Is it ok for their partners to continuously sacrifice their wants and needs because they love these men? 
Let’s dive into it. 
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Truth be told, Beth Pearson, Helen Sharpe and Georgia Goodwin had to endure a GREAT DEAL to emotionally support the dreams and aspirations of these men while sacrificing so much of themselves in the process. In media we often see women sacrificing so much of their wants and needs out of love for these male leads and rarely do men do the same thing for their romantic partners and love interests. All three of these women clearly fall under the Act of True Love trope defined as
“The Act of True Love proves beyond doubt that you are ready to put your loved one's interests before your own, that you are truly loyal and devoted to them. Usually this involves a sacrifice on your part, at the very least a considerable effort and/or a great risk. The action must be motivated, not by morals or principle or expectation of future reward, but by sheer personal affection.When your beloved is in dire need of your help, or in great danger, and you do something, at great expense to yourself, for the sake of their safety, their welfare, or their happiness, thus proving beyond any doubt that you put their interest ahead of yours.”
Over the past few seasons we have seen all three of these women truly live up to this trope without any true consequences or accountability from the men they’re making all these sacrifices for. For example, in Beth and Randall’s marriage, how many times did Randall spring an idea on Beth without truly talking to her or considering her wants first? Everyone thinks these two are an ideal couple but she has endured A LOT for Randall.
Randall has spontaneously quit his job, moved his dying biological dad into their home, bought his biological dad’s old apartment building, fostered and adopted a child and also ran for city councilman outside of his district. In all of these decisions, Randall “consulted” Beth about it but at the same time didn’t really consult her. In a way there has always been this expectation of Beth to just go along for the ride with what Randall wants. Is anyone else exhausted from reading that list?! That’s a lot for partner to endure and lovingly support. But Beth has endured and has been Randall’s rock through it all!!! What worries me is that the one time Beth spoke out about her wants and needs of pursuing dance again, he couldn’t match the same energy she was giving him and eventually it led to world war three between them. Though things are looking up in their relationship  and he’s starting to support her more, has Randall nearly given to Beth as much as she’s given to him? Absolutely not!
Similar to Randall, Max also had a wife who was a dancer. in fact, she was a prima ballerina. Unlike Randall and Beth, Max relationship with Georgia was rocky from the start. When we were first introduced to them Max and Georgia were separated and rightfully so. Georgia was never Max’s first priority. The hospital always came first in their relationship. He couldn’t even dedicate a full night to her for their proposal. In order to “save” their marriage they decide to have a baby and they both committed to taking a step back in their careers in order to do so. The problem was Max didn’t keep his side of their commitment and took a job to become the medical director at the biggest public hospital in the U.S. She gave up her career to start a family and he totally and completely betrayed her trust. So throughout season one we see them trying to rebuild their marriage but even in the midst of trying to rebuild a marriage based on trust and mutual respect Max still keeps things from Georgia. For several episodes he didn’t tell her that he had advance stages of throat cancer. He only told her when Georgia asked him to move back home. That’s fucked up! Then throughout their pregnancy he was never fully there for Georgia because he was either to preoccupied with the hospital or himself. At the end of it all, Georgia died tragically at the beginning of season two and really had nothing to show for it in her relationship with Max other than her daughter Luna.
Now let’s bring Helen Sharpe into the fold. While all of this stuff was going on with Max and his wife in season one, Max was developing a deep friendship, borderline emotional affair with Helen. Their relationship started out with Helen being his oncologist. As the new Medical Director of New Amsterdam, he swore Helen to secrecy about his diagnosis so that he could still run the hospital. Through that secrecy they eventually formed a deep bond but as his cancer got worse his secret was let out of the bag. He realistically needed someone to step up and run the hospital when he was going through chemo and though Helen already had commitments she stepped up and became his deputy medical director. Somewhere along the lines Max and Helen started developing feelings for each other. As Helen becomes aware of those feelings, she made a choice and decides to remove herself as Max’s doctor. He BITCHES about it but eventually accepts the boundary she’s clearly trying to set. Mind you, as this is unfolding, like Max, Helen is also in a new relationship with her boyfriend Panthaki. As Max’s cancer seems to be getting worse with his new doctor, she goes back on her boundary and decides to be his doctor again. This pisses her boyfriend off because he could already peep the vibe between them and he breaks up with her. When we get into season two, Max’s wife died and Helen set him up in a clinical trail (with a doctor she previously fired) that’s helping his cancer.  Unbeknownst to Max, this doctor ends up holding his life saving treatment plan over Helen’s head and in order for his treatment to continue she gives this doctor half of her department!
Helen has sacrificed a lot for Max and now in season three she’s finally prioritizing her current wants and needs first! Like Randall, Max is starting to turn a page and is starting to support Helen and truly listen to the wants and needs that she has. All of this is good but my question is did any of these women have to sacrifice so much for the men in their lives to get a clue?
Why is it that this is a trope we see in media time and time and time again? Even if these men are good, why don’t we still keep these male characters accountable when they put their significant others in these situations that are clearly not fair? I’ve watched countless tv shows and I’ve seen a lot of tv couples but I think I have only come across one couple where the male counterpart has selflessly loved his significant other and has always put her needs above his own. 
That character my friend is none other than PACEY WITTER
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I might be mistaken but I think Joey and Pacey are the most popular ship in tv history and honestly, rightfully so! This is only example I can think of where the male in the relationship so willingly puts the wants and needs of his partner first. It is a completely selfless and sacrificial love. He never wants to hold her back and he never asks her to compromise her wants or needs for him. That’s why I think so many women love Pacey because in a sea of TV relationships, Pacey Witter is a fucking unicorn.
So to wrap this up does this mean that I hate Randall Pearson or Max Goodwin? No! I adore them. I love both of their characters so much. I just think that when we see the media continuously play out the sacrificial wife/love interest for the sake of their male counterparts, it should be called out. I’m all about sacrificial and selfless love but it should come from both sides.❤️❤️❤️
Anyway I hope y’all enjoy this! As always my DMs are opening here or on Twitter @oyindaodewale
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Riding On
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Ch 17-Let Me Take An Elfie…
Summary: Christmas arrives in the Adler household and its full of laughter, giggles, and one huge gift that money simply can’t buy…
Warnings:  Bad Language words, Smut (NSFW, 18+)
Pairing: Frank Adler x Fliss Gallagher
A/N:  So, like, I’m over 2020 and wish it was Christmas already. This chapter brings Riding On Part 1 to a close and I’ll be likely taking a little break from writing this to concentrate on some stuff I have going on Stark Spangled for the Birthday Party! I hope you enjoy!
This one is dedicated to The Evangers…you know who you are!
Chapter Song:  I Wish It Could Be Christmas Everyday by Wizard (because who doesn’t?) 
Series Masterlist //  WIYPT Masterlist
When the Snowman brings the snow, well he just might like to know, he’s put a great big smile on somebody’s face. If you jump into your bed, quickly cover up your head. Don’t you lock the doors, you know that sweet Santa Clause is on the way.
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 Monday morning rolled round and for the first time in ages Frank woke well rested. After their plan had worked, he and Fliss had played the recording back to Greg who had been torn between calling them a pair of reckless dumbasses, and being elated with what it meant. Whilst he was unsure the court would permit it as evidence, he was going to have “some damned fun filing it anyway” and then set about giving them the final coaching for the Child Welfare Department interviews on Monday.
To Frank and Fliss, this was the final thing they could do. The last chance they had to get their feelings across and make a good impression before it was then over to the courts. And whilst Fliss was still hopeful that Polland would sign the papers as soon as he realised they had him on tape, Frank wasn’t quite as optimistic. So it was for that reason that over breakfast on the Monday he found himself rehearsing his speech to the Social Worker, just had he had done 2 years or so prior.
He needn’t have bothered though because, as Greg had predicted, the Social Workers discussion with him mainly centred on practical things such as Frank’s new job and his role, what Fliss did for a living, their new home and a little bit of digging into her background which was done sensitively and compassionately. It was the same Social Worker from 2 years back, a dark haired lady called Sarah Kellet, which Frnak was glad about, and she’d smiled when she’d run through things, checking all the facts that Greg had provided her before simply stating that was all she needed.
“What, no soul-searching questions?” Frank asked, arching an eyebrow. She chuckled and shook her head.
“Not this time.” she smiled “It’s a little different Mr Adler. You already have formal Guardianship over Mary so this isn’t about whether you’re suitable or not. This is really just a fact gathering exercise about whether or not formally providing you with Parental Status would be in her best interests.”
Frank swallowed and Fliss gently tangled her fingers in his as Sarah looked at them and smiled.
“Don’t worry.” She beamed. “When I spoke to Mary before it’s clear she’s exceptionally settled, and she adores her new brother as she refers to him as. You’ve created a very stable and loving environment for her, you’re financially credible, not that that’ the be all and end all, and you have a home, family support…all of this will be evidenced in my report.”
“So, do you make recommendations to the court?” Fliss asked and Sarah shook her head.
“Not as such, I’m merely here to pull together a factual, comprehensive report on how Mary is.” She tapped her pen slightly “And it’s always a little easier in cases like this when the minor has been in the care of the applicant prior to it. But, I will be making it quite clear in my conclusions that from the CWD point of view it would be in Mary’s best interests for the court to allow the adoption to go ahead, regardless of Mary’s father raising his objections. Basically if comes down to it, we’ll be fighting your corner.”
Fliss turned to Frank who let out the breath he hadn’t realised he’d been holding and she smiled at him.
“So, that’s it.” Sarah shrugged. “I’ll send a copy of everything through to the courts and your attorney Mr Adler. All that’s left is for me to wish you both a Merry Christmas and I’ll see you at the hearing whenever that is.” They both rose, shaking her hand and then Frank held the door to the room open for Fliss. She stepped out in front of him, and turned to him smiling.
“That’s it.” She shrugged “We did everything we could.” “Yeah, yeah I know.” He nodded “I’m just relieved it’s all over. Well, for now anyway.”
“Yup, so let’s get on with enjoying Christmas.” Fliss beamed as they walked down the corridor to the little area at the bottom where Mary was waiting. She was sat, reading a book being supervised by another one of the social workers and looked up, smiling as they entered. The woman who’d be supervising left them alone after bidding them goodbye and the three of them walked out to the truck.
“Think your mom and dad will be ok with Alex for a little longer?” Frank asked as Mary bounced ahead of them slightly.
“Sure, why?”
“I thought we could take her for a pizza and bowling, just the 3 of us before we pick Evelyn up from the airport.” Frank said “Been a while since we went.” “Yeah, sounds good.” Fliss beamed “I’ll call mum and let her know.”
Of course Verity and Bill were only too happy to keep Alex. Sian and the twins had arrived earlier that morning and Verity told Fliss that Sian was enjoying Auntie cuddles whilst batting her eyes at Steve asking him if he fancied another. Steve’s response had been to choke on his coffee. They headed to the bowling alley, where Fliss and Mary found to their delight that the skittles were all painted like elves for the festive period. They had 3 games and as usual they whooped Frank’s ass, leaving him in a fake mood declaring Christmas was cancelled. No sooner had the words left his mouth, Mary had vaulted onto his back causing him to laugh and attempt to pull her off. Eventually he succeeded and dangled her upside down by her ankles, the girl shrieking as he swung her round before setting her down.
“She’s getting a bit big to do that with now!” he looked at Fliss, letting out a huff as Mary righted her sweater and climbed into the truck.
“Well, she is 10 in a couple of months.” Fliss smiled and Frank shook his head.
“Don’t remind me.”
Fliss chuckled as she climbed into the passenger seat and the 3 of them headed off to the airport to collect Evelyn. They stood in the arrival lounge, Frank’s arm tossed over Fliss’ shoulders and Fliss could tell he was a little apprehensive. This was the first time he’d seen Evelyn since she had admitted outright she’d bribed Polland to give evidence. He’d told Fliss he wasn’t sure how he was going to react, that he didn’t want to be angry, but he couldn’t help it. Fliss had simply told him that they’d deal with whatever happened when it came.
As Evelyn walked through the glass double doors, pulling a huge case behind her, Mary shot forwards to greet her and the woman bent down, giving her a cuddle. Once more it struck Frank just how different it all was to the first meeting they’d had just over 2 years ago and as he watched his mother gently smooth Mary’s hair back any anger he was feeling simply dissipated. He knew only too well after the events of the last few years, he couldn’t change the past but he could make sure history never repeated itself. He watched as Mary and his mother made their way over to him and he took a deep breath as Evelyn glanced up at him, her face wrought with worried anticipation. She opened her mouth to say something, and Frank knew full well it was going to be an apology so he shook his head.
“It’s done.” He said simply “And I don’t wanna waste a single second more thinking about it, ok mom?”
Evelyn nodded, tears filling her eyes, and then in a sudden display of affection she moved to embrace him. It was a little stiff but Frank didn’t shy away, wrapping his arms around his mother in a gentle hug before he pulled away and took her bag off her.
When they reached Bill and Verity’s neither Frank nor Fliss was surprised to find that Verity had laid a spread on. She loved entertaining and so had taken it upon herself to pull together a buffet consisting of a selection of cold meats, breads, crudités, dips and savoury snacks along with a huge plate of her infamous brownies. No sooner had Frank walked into the kitchen he had a beer thrust into his hand by Steve who winked at him and he turned to Fliss a little sheepishly with a shrug.
“I’ll drive home.” She rolled her eyes playfully as she gently turned Alex so that he was against her chest, head raised slightly as he looked around.
“Oh fuck that.” Evelyn said, taking the red wine that Bill handed her as Frank gave a snort at his mother’s language, not that it surprised him, she’d always been quite colourful that way despite her proper appearance and professional demeanour “We’ll get a cab. It’s Christmas.” “See, she gets it!” Steve nodded to Evelyn who simply shrugged and took a sip of her wine before she set it down on the kitchen counter.
“May I?” she asked Fliss, gesturing to Alex and Fliss smiled.
“Of course, here…” she passed him over and Evelyn looked at the baby who broke into a gummy smile.
“He gets more like you ever time I see him.” Evelyn whispered, looking at Frank who smiled.
“Yeah, so I’m told” he shrugged, attempting an air of nonchalance but as Fliss looked at him smirking he knew he had failed. He fucking loved the fact his boy looked like him, it massaged his ego and he didn’t care one iota about how smug it made him appear.
After Mary, Charlie and Joel had eaten, the three of them headed upstairs to the movie room, arms laden with snacks as Bill put The Santa Clause on the large screen and the adults all settled in the living room. Evelyn asked if she could feed Alex and Frank obliged, handing her the baby and the bottle. There was a little more chat before Verity cleared her throat and addressed the huge elephant in the room.
“So, how did it go with the social worker kids?”
Fliss and Frank exchanged a glance before Frank smiled “Good, really good. In fact, she said in her conclusion they’ll recommend the adoption is processed regardless of any objections but, we’ll see. For now we’ve done everything we can so it’s down to the court in the New Year.”
“Oh, that’s…that’s great, that’s really….great.” Bill said, nodding as his eyes misted over and Verity stood up, moving to give Fliss a cuddle as her eyes had filled at the sight of her father’s emotions. Frank could feel the tears stabbing at his eyes too so, under the guise of nipping to the bathroom he took a moment and headed through the kitchen and out of the bi-folding doors, stepping onto the veranda which overlooked the landscaped garden and pool area.
Lost in his own thoughts, he hadn’t been out there that long when he heard someone behind him. A tumbler of scotch was pushed into his hand and he looked up as Steve clapped a hand on his shoulder.
“Thought you might need that.” He said, as he set the bottle and his own glass down on the table, fishing in his pocket for his cigarettes. As he sparked it up he took a drag, blowing it out to the side taking care to remain hidden.
“Fucking 38 and still hiding the fact I smoke from my mum.” Steve snorted and Frank shook his head.
“Hate to break it to you Steeb but she knows.” He chuckled at the look on Steve’s face “She was complaining to Fliss about it the other day.” “No shit.” Steve muttered, “Oh, well, fuck it…”
Frank laughed again and took a sip of his drink before he asked Steve about the house he was purchasing just out east of Tampa. Steve explained the sale was going through now and they should be ready to move in towards the middle of January.
“Good.” Frank nodded “If you need a hand, moving and stuff, just holler. Lord knows you did enough for us, I’d be glad to help.” “Don’t worry you will be.” Steve smirked and Frank snorted.
“How’s Sian taking to the move? Fliss said she was a little apprehensive.” “Yeah, she was.” Steve shrugged “But she’s also excited. I mean of course she’s nervous to leave her family behind but she knows it’s too good an opportunity to pass up on, and it won’t be forever. Probably about 5 years or so and we’ll head back home.” “I wouldn’t bet on it.” Frank said, knocking back his scotch.
“Why’s that?” Steve asked, his voice coming out as a slight mumble as he held his cigarette between his lips so he could top Frank’s glass up again.
“Well-cheers-“ Frank nodded, taking the tumbler off him “-it’s like Fliss said, once this place gets it’s claws into you, you kinda grow to love it.”
Steve chuckled and dropped his now done dab end onto the floor under his foot before he bent down and retrieved it, slipping it into his pocket to dispose of later.
“So, Fliss told you that we got family coming out this New Year?” Steve asked.
“She mentioned one of her cousins…” Frank paused “Tabs was it?”
“Babs.” Steve corrected “We got 4, there’s Eva who’s married to a Police Officer called Ari, Jen who’s married to a lawyer called Andy and Amber who is married to Curtis…” “He the train mechanic?” Frank racked his memory and Steve nodded.
“Yeah, they all still live in Liverpool but Babs, the one that’s coming…she’s something else.” Steve snorted. “She lives in Australia with a photographer called Hugh. Well, I say photographer, he’s kind of a trust fund rich boy that plays at it, you know? Nice enough guy though, always happy to shout you on a night out.”
“So they making a special trip over or…” “They’re taking some kind of sabbatical, if you can take a sabbatical from doing fuck all.” Steve shrugged “6 month tour of the US starting here. She’s fucking great fun though. Her and Fliss are the same age and were thick as thieves growing up, used to get into all sorts of mischief.” He shook his head. “They once set fire to a bin on a park. By accident mind. They were pretending to smoke these hollow twig things stuffed with dried grass and when one set on fire Babs panicked and tossed it into the bin.” Frank snorted as Steve continued.
“The whole thing went up.” Steve chuckled “So they legged it and got followed home by an off duty copper. Dad and Uncle Ted went ballistic…
“Wait…you dad’s brother is called Ted?” Frank asked.
“Yeah, Bill and Ted.” Steve grinned. Frank looked at him, before the pair of them burst out laughing, and couldn’t stop. It wasn’t that funny, it really wasn’t, but the more Steve laughed, the more Frank did, and the more Frank laughed, the more Steve died. By the time Frank managed to control himself he had tears of pure mirth in his eyes and he wiped them as his laughter subsided and he managed to take a breath, clutching at his side.
“What you two laughing at?” Fliss asked, stepping outside.
“Your face.” Steve shot back.
“Twat.” Fliss narrowed her eyes at him and she turned to Frank who was still chuckling “And I don’t know what you find so funny…”
“Nothing at all baby.” He smirked, dropping a kiss to her head, “Nothing at all.” ******
There were sore heads in the Adler household the next day. They’d stayed at Bill and Verity’s till well past midnight, and had left Mary there as she’d passed out asleep with the twins in the movie room. After they’d managed to herd all the kids to bed, the adults had continued drinking and eventually called it a night when Bill had fallen asleep in his arm chair, dropping his glass of brandy all over the floor.
Fliss had stable duties that morning, and took off early even though she felt she was still half drunk and when she returned a few hours later Frank and Evelyn were sat at the breakfast bar, each nursing cups of coffee and looking half dead. Eventually they all managed to muster enough about themselves to shower, dress and head over to pick Mary up. Frank was low-key pleased to see Steve looked worse than he felt and after a quick coffee they set off into the little town to have a walk round the Christmas Stalls that had been set up before they grabbed a bite to eat and Evelyn started telling Fliss a few stories about Frank and Diane when they had been children at Christmas.
“I think my personal favourite will be the carol service when you were 6.” Evelyn looked at Frank and he groaned taking a sip of his soda as he leaned back in his chair “He has a lovely voice you know and that year he was selected to do a solo.” “We don’t need to hear this…” Frank started to protest but Fliss cut him off.
“Yes we do, go on Evelyn.”
“So his particular hymn was Hark, the Herald Angels Sing. And the line ‘God and sinners reconciled’ was proving a little tricky for him as he rehearsed.”
“I was 6.” Frank deadpanned.
“I’m well aware, it still doesn’t stop it being funny.” Evelyn grinned “So up he gets, sings out the song note and word perfect until he gets to this line and belts out ‘God and sinners dressed in style’”
Fliss snorted and Mary let out a howl of laughter.
“You’re such a loser” she looked at him
“Quit it or you’ll be getting no presents tomorrow morning.”
“Whatever”
“Hey, do you remember that year grandpa sent us nothing?” Frank suddenly had a recollection and he looked at Evelyn who let out a loud laugh.
“God yes, you and Diane were disgusted!”
“Oh, the last year before he died-“ Frank started to explain as Fliss looked at him blankly “-well, he was clearly feeling his age and found that shopping for Christmas gifts had become too difficult. So he decided to send checks to everyone instead. In each card he wrote, ‘Buy your own present!’ and mailed them early. Only when we opened them, there was no check…he’d forgotten to enclose them with the cards.”
“So you all literally got a card with ‘buy your own present’ written inside?” Fliss laughed and Frank chuckled
“Yeah, which to be fair dad thought was hilarious but…poor Grandpa was devastated. He tried to blame Santa, of course, but it didn’t wash.”
“That’s because Santa isn’t real.” Mary looked at him.
“Yes he is.” Fliss sighed “I’m not having this debate with you again.” “You said yourself the other day that Frank was incapable of organising anything because he was a man so how could one dude organise gifts for the entire world?” Mary looked at her and Frank turned his head slowly to Fliss.
“Oh, you did, did you?”
Fliss hesitated, before she sighed “Come on, your organisational skills at home are ridiculous.”
“Do our bills get paid on time?”
“Yes, but-“
“Have either of the kids died yet?”
“No…” Fliss laughed.
“Then we’re good!” Frank shrugged, his hand gently dropping to his son’s tummy as he lay asleep in the stroller parked next to him “I find your lack of faith disturbing. And if we’re being sexist, I know Santa is a man as a woman wouldn’t be able to hack driving a sleigh around for a night, not to mention the complete mess she’d make trying to park it…”
“Wow!” Fliss looked at him as he laughed, “Ok, buddy, I bed I can think of 5 reasons why I would jump at the chance to be Santa.”
“Go on.” He teased and Fliss held up her hand, counting on her fingers as she spoke.
“One, I could grow to the size of Hawaii knowing it’s simply all part of the job. Two, I’d simply be able to buy one big, black belt, and brass buckle, and be accessorized for life. Three there would be no reason to have my hair colour done. Four, everyone would be extremely nice to me, regardless of my behaviour and five, if people commented that my belly jiggled when I laughed I could hit them with my purse.”
“Six…” Evelyn picked up as Frank laughed “You would always work in sensible footwear”
Frank shook his head “She always is anyway, not like you wear high heels to ride horses in and muck out stalls…”
“Those boots hurt when they’re not worn in.” Mary jabbed back “I know.”
With a snort Frank leaned back and looked down at Alex “Buddy, you better hurry up and start talking, I need someone here to even out the numbers.”
After another hour or so, when it was dark, they headed home and Evelyn bid them all a good night, heading to her guest suite above the garage to read and relax, declining their offer to join them for a drink stating she’d had quite enough the night before.
Mary wasn’t far behind, the excitement of the last few days having wiped her out, plus as she reminded Frank and Fliss, the sooner she went to bed the sooner it would be present time. She headed off for a bath before she settled down with her book upstairs and an hour or so later Frank went up to took her in, finding her fast asleep with Fred curled around her head.
It wasn’t even 8:30 pm and Fliss and Frank were all set for the evening. Presents wrapped, kids settled, and Frank had just moved to grab them a beer each when his phone sounded in his pocket.  He glanced at the shitty Nokia he was being forced to use after smashing his Samsung against the wall and frowned.
“It’s Greg.” He said before he answered. “Hey man.”
“S’up, listen, you guys free if I pop in for 5? I got a Christmas card for you and I forgot to drop it off earlier.”
“Yeah, sure.” Frank chuckled. “Just come on round the back, gate and the door are open.”
“No worries pal, see you in 15.”
“He coming over?” Fliss asked as Frank tossed the phone down on the side.
“Yeah, just for 5 minutes. Says he has a card for us.”
“A card?”
“Yeah, you know what he’s like. He’s probably had it for weeks and forgotten about it.” Frank shrugged, passing Fliss an open beer as they both crossed to the sofa. They settled down to watch the Christmas special of Brooklyn 99 and true to his word, Greg walked in 15 minutes or so later.
“Hey Greg, you want a beer?” Frank stood up, gesturing to the kitchen area.
“No I can’t stay, I just wanted to give you this before tomorrow.”
Frank paused and took the envelope off him. “This isn’t a card?” he frowned.
“No, it’s a little better than that.” Greg beamed as Fliss rose to her feet, crossing to where Frank was stood. With a frown, Frank turned the envelope over, opened it and as his eyes scanned the piece of paper he felt his mouth grow dry and his heart suddenly pounded so hard he felt it was going to thump right out of his chest.
“He signed the papers…” Frank whispered, swallowing as he looked at the document in his hands. “Lissy, Polland…he signed the adoption papers.”
“What?” Fliss breathed out as she took it from him, her eyes roving the wording before she looked at Frank, then Greg. “I- when?”
“I had a call earlier this afternoon saying they were dropping the objection.” Greg smiled. “Seems he suddenly had a change of heart when his Attorney told him he was on tape confessing to taking a bung and attempting to blackmail Fliss. I won’t tell you what he called him, it was a 4 letter word and ended in t…pretty sure you can fill in the gaps.” He nodded to the paper in Fliss hand “I asked him to hurry that through and it arrived about half an hour before I called. I wanted to give it to you in person.”
“So…we don’t need to go to court?” Frank breathed out, his eyes brimming with tears.
Greg shook his head “There’ll be a finalisation hearing in January but coupled with that and the CWD report it’s gonna simply be a formality. It’s as good as done.” “So, we’re…” Fliss took a deep breath “We’re gonna be her parents?”
Greg nodded. “Yup.”
Frank was struggling for words as he looked at his best friend before he pulled him into a huge bro hug. He stepped back, wiping his eyes as Fliss moved forward to hug Greg too, before they both walked him to his car.
“I owe you, big time.” Frank croaked and Greg waved him away as he opened the door to his Merc.
“I told you it would work out.” He shrugged, smiling broadly. “Merry Christmas guys.”
The two of them waved him off before Fliss turned to Frank, her tears falling down her cheeks “I can’t believe it…” “Me neither.” Frank spluttered and Fliss leaped into his arms, the pair of them laughing in sheer joy. Even thought they’d thrown themselves into the holiday spirit, neither of them had been able to shake that little feeling that a small, dark cloud was still following them. And now that was gone.
It was over. All over. They’d won.
Fliss and Frank headed back inside, both resisting the urge to wake Mary to tell her, deciding they’d leave it for the morning, but they absolutely did decide to crack a bottle of champagne open.
But Frank had an even better idea, one that came to him on a whim as they walked back through their garden. Silently he disappeared into the little laundry room at the side of the kitchen and when he emerged, Fliss had her back to him so she didn’t see him deposit the 2 pool towels on the breakfast bar. He moved to where she reaching for two champagne flutes, and as she stood on her tiptoes, he wrapped his arms around her from behind causing her to jump a little.
“I can’t believe it.” Fliss whispered “I mean I hoped he’d back down but…”
“I know” Frank kissed her neck tenderly “Another huge Christmas Eve huh? Second one in a row?”
Yeah.” She sighed happily, her hands falling on top of his arms, rubbing gently. “You know last year I was so nervous when I found out I was pregnant.”
“So was I, and that was before you told me that bit of news.” He smiled, his chin resting on her shoulder. “I’d been trying to propose for ages. I was shitting my pants it was gonna go wrong or you’d turn me down.”
“Not a chance Sailor.” She turned her head to look at him. “You’re stuck with me.” He pressed a kiss to her lips and the pair of them stood in silence in their kitchen, lost in their own thoughts, simply looking out of the window over their garden which was illuminated softly by the lighting round the pool area. Eventually Frank remembered his original plan and he smiled to himself.
“So all the presents are wrapped, everyone’s in bed waiting for the big guy with the sack to arrive…” Frank muttered, his lips grazing her neck “The pool heaters have been on all day…what about a Christmas Eve dip?”
Fliss turned in his arms, arching an eyebrow “Would you merely be trying to get me naked Francis?”
“Yes.” He nodded and she giggled.
“Skinny dipping? On Christmas Eve?”
“You lost your sense of adventure Cowgirl?” he teased.
Fliss peered round him to where Alex was sleeping in the basinet and with a grin pulled back and whipped off her T-shirt. “Does that answer your question?”
Frank laughed and caught the top as she threw it at him, tossing it to the side as he grabbed the towels. By the time he caught up with her outside Fliss was on the edge of the pool in nothing but her baby-blue cotton panties and his eyes scanned up her legs and the rest of her body until they locked onto hers. She bit her lip as she stepped out of her underwear and Frank felt his cock twitch as she turned and coyly shot him a look over her shoulder before she descended down the mosaic tiled steps at the shallow end of the pool.  
Not wanting to waste a second more he threw the towels down on one of the sun loungers and reached over his head, grabbing a fistful of his grey t-shirt. He pulled it off before be quickly undid his belt and in one swoop yanked down his loose jeans and boxers.
Fliss dropped off the bottom step, her shoulders dipping under the warm water as she turned to watch Frank following her in, her eyes trailing up from his knees over his thighs, semi-erect cock which stood beneath that happy trail that led down his slim, flat yet ever so slightly soft stomach and up to his broad shoulders and strong arms. Her eyes moved to his handsome face, the stubble on his jaw line always gave him a more rugged look and his short hair was spiked up messily as it usually was at the end of the day.
Fuck, he was beautiful. 
And not just on the outside. Even before the events of the last few weeks Fliss knew her man was the most caring, wonderful and doting father and lover on the planet but since the issue with Polland had raised its head she'd seen a side to him that she had only ever caught glimpses of before. A softer, vulnerable side and it filled her heart with even more love for him for reasons she couldn't explain other than it just did. He wasn't afraid to show weakness to her, he wasn't ashamed to tell her his fears. Because they were a true partnership. And as she watched him crouch down so his body was submerged in the water, his eyes sparkling in the lights, she felt an unnerving spike of desire that was so strong it surged right from her toes up her body, leaving her slightly fuzzy headed, like she was drunk on love. 
Frank cocked his head playfully to the side as Fliss gracefully pushed off the ball of her foot and swam towards him before she twisted in the water slightly and brought her legs out in front of her. She wrapped them round his waist, settling herself on his lap as his large hands gently splayed on her back. Fliss nuzzled her nose against his chin, nudging his head back so she could chain soft kisses across his jaw line, her lips skating the bristles on his face as she gently nipped at his skin. Frank let out a soft sigh, his hands pulling her closer as she moved her affections down his neck, over his Adam’s apple before she gently sucked at the junction of his shoulder and neck, grinding down on him, her bare core slicking over his cock.
"Fuck, Liss..." he stuttered, pulling back to look at her, the water sloshing around them "what's got into you, pretty girl?"
"Nothing yet." She purred back.
Frank looked at her, but before he could make a smart reply she’d dropped her hand from his shoulder into the pool and wrapped her palm around him making him choke on his words slightly as she stroked him with a few quick flicks of her wrist.
“Jesus baby…” he managed to croak as her eyes locked onto his and a smirk curled on her lips. She leaned forwards, her teeth nipping at his ear and he gave a soft groan, his head falling back slightly as she continued to work him, her hand pumping up and down his now rock hard dick. And then she stopped, and he felt her mouth curve open and her breath was hot on his skin as she whispered 3 words that sent red hot fire coursing through his entire body.
“Fuck me, Sailor.”
He didn’t need asking twice. 
Fliss moved herself, guiding him to where she wanted and she sank down onto his length, his hands grabbing her hips as she took him in completely, a low, drawn out gasp escaping her lips as Frank hissed slightly as her walls clamped around him. He gave himself a moment, enjoying the feel of her before he thrust upwards, his fingers curling around her soft flesh as he drew back slowly, before pushing back into her deeply, rotating his hips. Fliss’ hands curled around his shoulders, her head tipping back, eyes closed in pleasure, the action causing her breasts to rise out of the water. Keeping his rhythm slow and deep he dipped his head, his tongue tracing a stripe down her cleavage, the salty tang of the pool water hitting his taste buds as he directed his attention to her nipple, flicking and sucking softly, all the time listening and feeling her reactions as she pushed down further against him, desperate for more. For whatever reason, Fliss was in a downright filthy mood and Frank had a feeling that slow and steady wasn’t going to be enough. He moved his mouth, nipping up her neck before his lips pressed onto hers, the kiss filthy as his tongue fucked her mouth and he pulled back as he began to back himself up to the side of the pool.
With a quick movement he turned so Fliss’s back was against the tiled edge, and he looked at her as she stared at him, her deep brown eyes wide with lust as he dipped his head to kiss her again.
“Turn around.” He instructed, his voice low and Fliss complied, moving off him and spinning in the water. One large hand slid up her spine to her neck and his fingers gently curled around her nape as he pushed her forwards slightly, before he slid both his hands up her arms and directed her hands to grip at the lip of the pool.
Fliss’ body was tingling with anticipation. Her palms gripped round the rough surface of the pool edge as she surrendered to Frank’s control, his chest pressing against her back, lips sucking at her neck.
“If this is too much, tell me…” he whispered against her skin. Fliss tilted her face round to look at him, seeing those ocean blues she loved shining with love and what looked like a slight glimmer of concern. And she knew why. Whilst their sex was hot, passionate, loving, it was very rarely rough because he didn’t want to push her too far knowing her past. But she wanted this, she needed it. She smiled at him, pressing her lips to his.
“I trust you.” She promised him gently and Frank kissed her again before he pulled away. His hands gripped her hips, lifting her ass up so her feet planted on the floor of the pool as he rose to his, the water lapping around his thighs as he buried himself into her with one swift movement. He pulled out slowly before he thrust back into her, grinding against her as she gasped, her head tilting backwards as he continued rocking his hips back and forth, slowly at first, his movements gathering pace until he built up into a fast, relentless rhythm, every drive into her jolting her forwards slightly as she braced herself against the edge with her arms, elbows locked to absorb the shock. Pants, whimpers, soft cries and the debauched sound of sloshing and skin slapping skin filled the otherwise silent night air of the garden and Frank dropped his eyes to the point where he was pounding in and out of his girl, the sight of where they were joined was hot as fuck and he let out a groan as he watched for a second, before his eyes flicked back up to Fliss. Her head was dropped between her arms, slightly twisted to the right and he could see her eyes were closed, jaw slack, full lips open in a silent cry.
As he continued his powerful, fast thrusts, his cock brushed occasionally against that spot inside and Fliss felt the coil in her belly beginning to tighten slowly, each time he hit it. Frank adjusted his stance and bent over, his right hand falling over hers as he too braced himself against the edge of the pool, giving a dirty grind and Fliss cried out loudly at the sensation.
“Fuck, right there…” she encouraged and Frank repeated the movement again, his bottom lip caught between his teeth as he was fighting the urge he was feeling to come.
“Liss, shit…” he gasped, his left hand dropping between her legs, coaxing her clit and after a few strong strokes Fliss arched her back, her head following as she let out a cry of his name as the world tilted on its axis, her orgasm rocking her to her very core. The feeling was too much for Frank and with a loud moan that rumbled from his chest he followed her right over the edge, his thrusts growing sloppy as he pumped through his own release before he stilled, his head bowing as he waited for the surge of ecstasy to dissipate.
Eventually the fog lifted enough so that he was able to bend his knees slightly, and with the arm that was curled around Fliss’ waist he turned them in the water. Fliss was near dead weight and went with him obligingly, his cock still buried in her as he pivoted and dropped down so that his back was against the wall of the pool and she sat on his lap, the water gently splashing around their shoulders.
Frank cradled her close, pressing a kiss to her neck as he gave a low hum of satisfaction, her head falling back against his shoulder, a smile flickering across her lips.
“You know…” Frank mumbled after a little moment of silence “Cowgirls will always be my favourite, even in reverse.”
Fliss gave a soft chuckle as she opened her eyes and titled her head to look at him. “I prefer sailors…” she smirked and he laughed, pressing his lips to hers.
“You ok?” he asked, as her hands fell over his arms, fingers softly skating up his wet skin and she gave a nod.
“Never better.” She affirmed.
“Good.” He kissed her temple. “You wanna get out or…”
“No, I’m good here for a while.” She purred and he smiled, his mouth dropping to her shoulder where he pressed another kiss to her skin.
Eventually Fliss reluctantly conceded that they probably should get out as Alex would want feeding again any time soon. But, not wanting the moment to end, Frank suggested that whilst she showered he could do the feed and light the fire-pit. Fliss agreed and after wrapping herself in a towel she kissed him again and headed upstairs. Frank dried himself off, located his T-shirt and shrugged it on, leaving the towel round his waist as he warmed a bottle for his now grumbling son. By the time Fliss came back down stairs in her plaid sleep pants and tank, Alex was just finishing up. Frank passed him over, and they both headed back outside. Once the fire was lit Frank scooted off for a quick shower and returned 10 minutes later to find Alex settled once more in the basinet, tucked snuggly under his Christmas blanket that was decorated with little Santa’s and trees, his eyes roaming the starry sky.  Fliss sat with her legs under a tartan fleece on the outside sofa, the bottle of champagne stood in the middle of the table in an ice bucket and either side of it rested two full flutes. With a satisfied sigh Frank sat next to her, reaching for his drink and resting his feet on the table as Fliss snuggled under his arm. The pair of them clinked their glasses together, shared another soft kiss and settled into a soft chatter.
It was cosy, domestic, loving, and everything Fliss had ever dreamed of having, but never in a million years thinking she’d experience, and as they sat talking and laughing, speculating about Mary’s reaction the news of her adoption being tomorrow, she felt herself suddenly choked with emotion and she sat up, looking at her man.
“I think she’s gonna...” Frank trailed off, frowning at the look on Fliss’ face “Hey, honey what’s wrong?” “Absolutely nothing.” She muttered, clambering onto his lap so she was straddling him, jolting the glass he was holding a little and sending some of the Moet spilling onto the patio.
“You sure?” he titled his head to look at her and she nodded, sniffing back her tears as she kissed him, her hands running through his messy hair.
“I’m just so happy Frank, I can’t stop thinking about how much I lucked out.” She whispered as she pulled away and Frank smiled against her mouth.
“I think I’m the one that lucked out.” He whispered, his spare hand reaching up to smooth her hair back slightly.
“Maybe we can agree we’re both lucky bastards” she grinned and he chuckled, his eyes locking onto hers.
“I can live with that.” He agreed.
******
For the second day in a row Frank and Fliss woke with hangovers, as post the champagne they hit the bourbon and didn’t go to bed until 2 am. Now it was half 6 and Frank wasn’t impressed that he was going to have to deal with a hyper 9 year old who was currently bouncing on his bed, a 16 week old and his mother with a headache and only 4 and a half hours sleep.
After they sat and opened the gifts in their stocking, Frank telling Fliss to leave the thin, flat box until she was alone, they headed downstairs. Frank grinned at Fliss as Mary bust into the family room and glanced at the presents which were arranged in a pile by the sofa. The three of them exchanged their gifts, Fliss being especially delighted with her Spa Day voucher from Mary and Alex, which Frank informed her Simon had also gotten one for Bonnie so they could go together. Frank had also bought her a few new pairs of riding breeches, signed her up for a year’s subscription to Kindle Unlimited, a few more items of clothing, a 3 Pandora charms in the shape of the letters, F, M and A meaning she had one for them all and a stunning silver and diamond necklace and earring set from Tiffany’s which Fliss gasped at when she opened. In contrast Fliss had bought Frank a new phone from Alex and Mary to replace the one he’d smashed against the wall, a few T-shirts and then cryptically told him the biggest gift from her was yet to come.
“You’re not pregnant again are you?” he leaned over and asked her semi-seriously.
“Fuck, no!” she spluttered and he let out the breath he hadn’t realised he’d been holding. “It’s just a little big…you’ll see.”
Before he could press her any further, Mary gave a loud shriek as she unwrapped the hooded top that was decorated the same as her Gillet and grinned, jamming it on over her pyjama top. Frank laughed as she did a parade in front of them before she paused, looking at the door to the little room off the kitchen. Frank had covered over the door frame in wrapping paper as it held her big present and Mary looked at it, before she turned to Frank and Fliss, frowning.
“What’s that?”
“Dunno.” Frank teased “Why don’t you go through and see?”
Mary looked at the pair of them again before she ran over, her reindeer slippers padding over the floor and she tore through the paper, pushing the door open.
Frank curled his arm round Fliss, kissed the side of her head as they followed her into the room where Mary was stood, gaping around.
As a surprise they’d turned it into a little sitting room of sorts for her. Over the last 4 weeks they had meticulously emptied it of the crap that had been in there since they’d moved in and they’d completely re-decorated it. Frank had painted a pale yellow on 3 of the walls, the 4th at the back was papered with a huge picture of Monty in the pasture. Her show rosettes were hung on a trellis which Frank had screwed to the wall with plenty of space for more and on the shelving unit which housed a large, flat screen Tv, Blu-ray player and Android box were positioned a few photos of various family shots. To finish the room off, 2 huge bean bags were placed in the middle of the room which were big enough for Fliss and Frank to lie in (they'd had a lot of fun trying them out) and there was a small desk in the corner along with an office chair. But it was the electronic keyboard nestled in the corner of the wall that held the TV that caught Mary’s eye.
As Fred sauntered in and hopped up on a bean bag as if he owned the place, Mary walked over to the keyboard running her hands along it before she turned to look at the two adults, her mouth hanging open.
“We thought you might like a place to hang out or chillax or whatever it is you kids do now...” Frank smiled “You know, instead of always needing to go to your room when Rosie or whoever comes over. You can study in here too as well.”
“And trust me you'll want your own space once this monster starts crawling.” Fliss smiled, readjusting Alex in her arms slightly.
“I love it…” Mary gasped, looking around her eyes brimming “My own special living room…and a sort of piano.”
“Well, you keep up your lessons with Nanny V and we might, and I mean might, get you a real one” Frank smiled and Mary beamed at him before she shot over to the pair of them. Frank picked her up with a groan and kissed her cheek.
“Rosie is gonna be well jel.” She giggled and Frank laughed as Mary leaned over to kiss Fliss’ cheek.
“There’s something in the desk for you too.” Frank took a deep breath, setting Mary down on the floor. As she walked over the room, Frank moved, his arm hooking round Fliss’ waist as they watched her open the lid of the desk and take out the envelope. With a frown she pulled it open and her eyes widened as she looked at the detail.
“Is this…” she started breathing deeply, her gaze shooting up to Frank’s, her eyes filling with tears “He…”
Frank nodded, his own eyes pricking with tears “Yeah, he signed the papers Stack.”
“So, I’m…I’m adopted?” she stuttered.
“Not quite but…” Frank sniffed, “It’s about as good as done, yeah. Greg got those yesterday.”
As Mary looked back down at the paper in her hand, Frank spotted a tear fall from her face and then he frowned as he saw her legs starting to shake. In a flash he was by her side, catching her as she dropped to her knees. She wrapped her arms around his neck, the paper scrunching slightly in her hand as she buried her face into the crook of his neck and began to cry.
Frank pressed his face into her hair, trying desperately to keep his own tears from falling but failing miserably. Fliss was already gone, and she moved to walk towards them, dropping gently to her knees, Alex held safely in her arms.
“We’re gonna be a proper family.” Mary sobbed and Frank stuttered a laugh as he pulled back to look down at her.
“Mary, baby, we already were.” His voice cracked and she nodded against his neck, before she started to cry again. At that point Thor walked into the room and pushed his nose straight in between Mary and Frank, licking her face and letting out soft little whines.
Mary giggled and grabbed his fur gently “Thor, get off you doofus…”
“Is everything ok?” a voice made all of them look up to see Evelyn in the doorway, wrapped in a dressing gown and slippers. Frank, who had momentarily forgotten he’d text her to come join them, looked up through his tears and nodded. Fliss took the paper out of Mary’s hand and held it out to Evelyn. She gently gripped it, her eyebrows raised slightly, and then her hand flew to her mouth when she read the writing.
“Oh, that’s….that’s fantastic!” she sniffed, “Really…”
Mary, whose sobs had now subsided suddenly pulled back from Frank and looked at Fliss, “We need to give Frank his present!”
“Yup, we do!”
“Yeah, what…” Frank frowned “I’m kinda scared about this you know.” “Oh trust me, you’re gonna LOVE it!” Mary grinned, before she stood up straight.
“Why don’t you let me watch Alex whilst you head out?” Evelyn smiled and Fliss handed him over to his grandmother before the three of them headed to the hallway. Fliss fished the garage keys off the hooks by the door and tossed them to Frank who caught them in his right hand.
“You’re gonna need those” she smiled. Frank arched an eyebrow as he shoved on his sneakers but didn’t say anything as they headed out into the December sun, making their way over the drive.
“Is something gonna jump out at me?” he paused, the keys in the door.
“No.” Mary grinned. With one final, suspicious look at them he flung the up-and-over door open and stopped dead as he looked into the now full space of the double garage, his mouth hanging open.
In front of him was a fairly large boat. It had a covered lower deck area which housed the main engine and cockpit and a large, open flat stern area with benches. It was old, and in need of a fuck tonne of work but Frank was absolutely over the moon.
“Holy shit. You…you bought me a boat?” he turned to Fliss who grinned and nodded.
“I suppose technically I bought us a boat, but…” she shrugged as Frank moved over to examine it. He ran his hands over the hull, which was sound enough considering the state the rest of it was in and he turned to Fliss, his handsome face splitting into a huge smile.  
“It’s a wreck, I love it!” he beamed and Fliss grinned as he took her face in both hands and kissed her “Thank you baby.” “Well I thought about getting a newer one but I know you’ve always wanted to do your own up” she smiled as he pulled away “Plus, from a purely selfish point of view, I’m kinda looking forward to seeing you full of grease again.”
He grinned and arched an eyebrow before he kissed her again and Mary made a gagging noise. He turned to her, playfully swatting at her head and the 3 of them made their way back to the house, Frank casting a loving glance at his newest prized possession before he pulled the door down and locked it.
They exchanged gifts with Evelyn over breakfast, both Mary and Alex’s piles in the living room were significantly larger when they finished opening the bags full each and then following a breakfast of pancakes and bacon which was made whilst dancing around the kitchen to various Christmas songs, Fliss and Mary headed over to the yard to see to the horses and sneak a quick ride in before they needed to head over to Bill and Verity’s.
Fliss opted to shower first so she could get Alex ready and once she was alone she took her time to open the present Frank had told her to leave until later. As she pulled off the wrapping paper she smiled to herself as she saw the Victoria Secrets box and lifted the lid off, gently pulling back the pink tissue wrapping. Biting her lip she pulled out the sheer gold negligee, which was beautiful and rather classy as well, before she placed it back in the box and headed into the bathroom.
Just as she’d finished dressing Frank walked into their room, Alex in his arms and he smiled, pressing his lips to hers.
“I opened it…” Fliss smiled against his mouth.
“Yeah?”
“Mmmhmmm” she affirmed “I happen to think I suit gold.”
Frank smiled “I’m sure you do.”
She grinned and took Alex off him before she headed out of the room, Frank watching her go before he stripped off his clothing and headed into the bathroom.
20 minutes or so later, dressed casually in a pair of jeans and a red and blue flannel button down, he wandered into the family room and stopped dead as he caught sight of Alex’s outfit.
“Lissy, what the fuck is my boy wearing?” Frank stared at the baby who was sat on Mary’s knee on the sofa, dressed in a green elf onesie. It had a black strip round the middle with a little yellow belt buckle detail, and the collar was red and ruffled. The legs were red and white hooped, just like tights, and on his head sat a red and green hat. As Frank stared at him in disbelief, Alex gazed up at his dad and let out a loud excited noise and waved his hands and legs.
“He looks cute, Frank.” Mary grinned, herself dressed in a white little blouse detailed with christmas patterns. Fliss walked over from the kitchen where she had been boxing up the sugar cookies she had made and grinned as Frank glared at her, pointing to Alex.
“He’s a fucking elf.” He deadpanned. “In tights.”
“Language.” Fliss slapped his arm lightly before she shrugged and gestured to her own Christmas sweater which depicted Santa stuck upside down in a chimney “It’s Christmas.” Frank shook his head. “He looks ridiculous.”
“Don’t be a scrooge.” Mary grinned and Frank shot her a glare, before he glanced at his son again, shaking his head. Alex seemed absolutely nonplussed at the fact his Mother had dressed him in the utterly stupid get up and Frank turned, shaking his head as Fliss smirked at him.
“Everyone is gonna laugh at him.” He pouted and Fliss snorted
“No they’re not!”
Frank knew he wasn’t going to win the argument, Fliss was as big a child as anyone when it came to Christmas, but he was damned if he was going to let his boy be the subject of ridicule without a fight. But whatever protest he had left died in his throat as at that point Evelyn walked back into the room, a few more gift bags in her hands for Fliss’ family and Roberta and let out a little chuckle.
“Oh my God, doesn’t he look adorable.” She clapped her hands and walked towards her grandson.
Fliss bit her lip, her shoulders shaking with laughter at the utter indignation on Frank’s face as he rolled his eyes, letting out an exasperated growl as she slid her arms up round his neck. “Fine, just…whatever.” He sighed as she pulled his head down to hers, catching his lips in a soft peck. “Poor kid’s gonna grow up with a complex” he mumbled against her mouth “First the dinosaur outfit at Halloween, now this…”
“Well, so he doesn’t feel too bad, I got you a matching jumper.”
“Yeah Frank, you can put it on and then we can all take an elfie with your new phone, geddit?” Mary grinned and Fliss snorted. Frank pulled back and glared at Mary “Over my dead body.” “Can be arranged.” She retorted, and at that Fliss and Evelyn burst into laughter.
“Well that’s just mean.” Frank pouted and Fliss grinned, standing on her tiptoes.
“I’ll make it up to you later Sailor.” She whispered, her lips brushing his ear “I’ll let you decide if gold really is my colour for yourself…”
“Yeah?” he asked, arching an eyebrow, his hands dropping to her hips.
“If you wear the sweater…” “That’s…that’s blackmail.” He narrowed his eyes.
“I know.” She pulled back, turning to Mary and Evelyn. “Ok, shall we load the cars up? Mary you wanna ride with me or Frank?”
“Who’s goin’ to get Roberta?”
“Frank.” Fliss said “I’m taking Alex and Thor…and Fred.” She added as an after-thought. “Then I’ll go with him.” She nodded “That ok?”
“Sure.” Fliss smiled, her hand dropping to Mary’s head.
There was a sudden, excited bustle around the room as everyone moved to get their things together…and Frank went upstairs to change into his new elf sweater.
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wiypt-writes · 3 years
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Riding On
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Ch 17-Let Me Take An Elfie…
Summary: Christmas arrives in the Adler household and its full of laughter, giggles, and one huge gift that money simply can’t buy…
Warnings:  Bad Language words, Smut (NSFW, 18+)
Pairing: Frank Adler x Fliss Gallagher
A/N:  So, like, I’m over 2020 and wish it was Christmas already. This chapter brings Riding On Part 1 to a close and I’ll be likely taking a little break from writing this to concentrate on some stuff I have going on Stark Spangled for the Birthday Party! I hope you enjoy!
This one is dedicated to The Evangers…you know who you are!
Disclaimer: This is a pure work of fiction and classified as 18+. Please respect this and do not read if you are underage. I do not own any characters in this series bar Fliss Gallagher and the other OCs. By reading beyond this point you understand and accept the terms of this disclaimer.
Riding On Masterlist // Main Masterlist
Chapter 16 Part 2
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 Monday morning rolled round and for the first time in ages Frank woke well rested. After their plan had worked, he and Fliss had played the recording back to Greg who had been torn between calling them a pair of reckless dumbasses, and being elated with what it meant. Whilst he was unsure the court would permit it as evidence, he was going to have “some damned fun filing it anyway” and then set about giving them the final coaching for the Child Welfare Department interviews on Monday.
To Frank and Fliss, this was the final thing they could do. The last chance they had to get their feelings across and make a good impression before it was then over to the courts. And whilst Fliss was still hopeful that Polland would sign the papers as soon as he realised they had him on tape, Frank wasn’t quite as optimistic. So it was for that reason that over breakfast on the Monday he found himself rehearsing his speech to the Social Worker, just had he had done 2 years or so prior.
He needn’t have bothered though because, as Greg had predicted, the Social Workers discussion with him mainly centred on practical things such as Frank’s new job and his role, what Fliss did for a living, their new home and a little bit of digging into her background which was done sensitively and compassionately. It was the same Social Worker from 2 years back, a dark haired lady called Sarah Kellet, which Frnak was glad about, and she’d smiled when she’d run through things, checking all the facts that Greg had provided her before simply stating that was all she needed.
“What, no soul-searching questions?” Frank asked, arching an eyebrow. She chuckled and shook her head.
“Not this time.” she smiled “It’s a little different Mr Adler. You already have formal Guardianship over Mary so this isn’t about whether you’re suitable or not. This is really just a fact gathering exercise about whether or not formally providing you with Parental Status would be in her best interests.”
Frank swallowed and Fliss gently tangled her fingers in his as Sarah looked at them and smiled.
“Don’t worry.” She beamed. “When I spoke to Mary before it’s clear she’s exceptionally settled, and she adores her new brother as she refers to him as. You’ve created a very stable and loving environment for her, you’re financially credible, not that that’ the be all and end all, and you have a home, family support…all of this will be evidenced in my report.”
“So, do you make recommendations to the court?” Fliss asked and Sarah shook her head.
“Not as such, I’m merely here to pull together a factual, comprehensive report on how Mary is.” She tapped her pen slightly “And it’s always a little easier in cases like this when the minor has been in the care of the applicant prior to it. But, I will be making it quite clear in my conclusions that from the CWD point of view it would be in Mary’s best interests for the court to allow the adoption to go ahead, regardless of Mary’s father raising his objections. Basically if comes down to it, we’ll be fighting your corner.”
Fliss turned to Frank who let out the breath he hadn’t realised he’d been holding and she smiled at him.
“So, that’s it.” Sarah shrugged. “I’ll send a copy of everything through to the courts and your attorney Mr Adler. All that’s left is for me to wish you both a Merry Christmas and I’ll see you at the hearing whenever that is.” They both rose, shaking her hand and then Frank held the door to the room open for Fliss. She stepped out in front of him, and turned to him smiling.
“That’s it.” She shrugged “We did everything we could.” “Yeah, yeah I know.” He nodded “I’m just relieved it’s all over. Well, for now anyway.”
“Yup, so let’s get on with enjoying Christmas.” Fliss beamed as they walked down the corridor to the little area at the bottom where Mary was waiting. She was sat, reading a book being supervised by another one of the social workers and looked up, smiling as they entered. The woman who’d be supervising left them alone after bidding them goodbye and the three of them walked out to the truck.
“Think your mom and dad will be ok with Alex for a little longer?” Frank asked as Mary bounced ahead of them slightly.
“Sure, why?”
“I thought we could take her for a pizza and bowling, just the 3 of us before we pick Evelyn up from the airport.” Frank said “Been a while since we went.” “Yeah, sounds good.” Fliss beamed “I’ll call mum and let her know.”
Of course Verity and Bill were only too happy to keep Alex. Sian and the twins had arrived earlier that morning and Verity told Fliss that Sian was enjoying Auntie cuddles whilst batting her eyes at Steve asking him if he fancied another. Steve’s response had been to choke on his coffee. They headed to the bowling alley, where Fliss and Mary found to their delight that the skittles were all painted like elves for the festive period. They had 3 games and as usual they whooped Frank’s ass, leaving him in a fake mood declaring Christmas was cancelled. No sooner had the words left his mouth, Mary had vaulted onto his back causing him to laugh and attempt to pull her off. Eventually he succeeded and dangled her upside down by her ankles, the girl shrieking as he swung her round before setting her down.
“She’s getting a bit big to do that with now!” he looked at Fliss, letting out a huff as Mary righted her sweater and climbed into the truck.
“Well, she is 10 in a couple of months.” Fliss smiled and Frank shook his head.
“Don’t remind me.”
Fliss chuckled as she climbed into the passenger seat and the 3 of them headed off to the airport to collect Evelyn. They stood in the arrival lounge, Frank’s arm tossed over Fliss’ shoulders and Fliss could tell he was a little apprehensive. This was the first time he’d seen Evelyn since she had admitted outright she’d bribed Polland to give evidence. He’d told Fliss he wasn’t sure how he was going to react, that he didn’t want to be angry, but he couldn’t help it. Fliss had simply told him that they’d deal with whatever happened when it came.
As Evelyn walked through the glass double doors, pulling a huge case behind her, Mary shot forwards to greet her and the woman bent down, giving her a cuddle. Once more it struck Frank just how different it all was to the first meeting they’d had just over 2 years ago and as he watched his mother gently smooth Mary’s hair back any anger he was feeling simply dissipated. He knew only too well after the events of the last few years, he couldn’t change the past but he could make sure history never repeated itself. He watched as Mary and his mother made their way over to him and he took a deep breath as Evelyn glanced up at him, her face wrought with worried anticipation. She opened her mouth to say something, and Frank knew full well it was going to be an apology so he shook his head.
“It’s done.” He said simply “And I don’t wanna waste a single second more thinking about it, ok mom?”
Evelyn nodded, and then in a sudden display of affection she moved to embrace him. It was a little stiff but Frank didn’t shy away, wrapping his arms around his mother in a gentle hug before he pulled away and took her bag off her.
When they reached Bill and Verity’s neither Frank nor Fliss was surprised to find that Verity had laid a spread on. She loved entertaining and so had taken it upon herself to pull together a buffet consisting of a selection of cold meats, breads, crudités, dips and savoury snacks along with a huge plate of her infamous brownies. No sooner had Frank walked into the kitchen he had a beer thrust into his hand by Steve who winked at him and he turned to Fliss a little sheepishly with a shrug.
“I’ll drive home.” She rolled her eyes playfully as she gently turned Alex so that he was against her chest, head raised slightly as he looked around.
“Oh fuck that.” Evelyn said, taking the red wine that Bill handed her as Frank gave a snort at his mother’s language, not that it surprised him, she’d always been quite colourful that way despite her proper appearance and professional demeanour “We’ll get a cab. It’s Christmas.” “See, she gets it!” Steve nodded to Evelyn who simply shrugged and took a sip of her wine before she set it down on the kitchen counter.
“May I?” she asked Fliss, gesturing to Alex and Fliss smiled.
“Of course, here…” she passed him over and Evelyn looked at the baby who broke into a gummy smile.
“He gets more like you ever time I see him.” Evelyn whispered, looking at Frank who smiled.
“Yeah, so I’m told” he shrugged, attempting an air of nonchalance but as Fliss looked at him smirking he knew he had failed. He fucking loved the fact his boy looked like him, it massaged his ego and he didn’t care one iota about how smug it made him appear.
After Mary, Charlie and Joel had eaten, the three of them headed upstairs to the movie room, arms laden with snacks as Bill put The Santa Clause on the large screen and the adults all settled in the living room. Evelyn asked if she could feed Alex and Frank obliged, handing her the baby and the bottle. There was a little more chat before Verity cleared her throat and addressed the huge elephant in the room.
“So, how did it go with the social worker kids?”
Fliss and Frank exchanged a glance before Frank smiled “Good, really good. In fact, she said in her conclusion they’ll recommend the adoption is processed regardless of any objections but, we’ll see. For now we’ve done everything we can so it’s down to the court in the New Year.”
“Oh, that’s…that’s great, that’s really….great.” Bill said, nodding as his eyes misted over and Verity stood up, moving to give Fliss a cuddle as her eyes had filled at the sight of her father’s emotions. Frank could feel the tears stabbing at his eyes too so, under the guise of nipping to the bathroom he took a moment and headed through the kitchen and out of the bi-folding doors, stepping onto the veranda which overlooked the landscaped garden and pool area.
Lost in his own thoughts, he hadn’t been out there that long when he heard someone behind him. A tumbler of scotch was pushed into his hand and he looked up as Steve clapped a hand on his shoulder.
“Thought you might need that.” He said, as he set the bottle and his own glass down on the table, fishing in his pocket for his cigarettes. As he sparked it up he took a drag, blowing it out to the side taking care to remain hidden.
“Fucking 38 and still hiding the fact I smoke from my mum.” Steve snorted and Frank shook his head.
“Hate to break it to you Steeb but she knows.” He chuckled at the look on Steve’s face “She was complaining to Fliss about it the other day.” “No shit.” Steve muttered, “Oh, well, fuck it…”
Frank laughed again and took a sip of his drink before he asked Steve about the house he was purchasing just out east of Tampa. Steve explained the sale was going through now and they should be ready to move in towards the middle of January.
“Good.” Frank nodded “If you need a hand, moving and stuff, just holler. Lord knows you did enough for us, I’d be glad to help.” “Don’t worry you will be.” Steve smirked and Frank snorted.
“How’s Sian taking to the move? Fliss said she was a little apprehensive.” “Yeah, she was.” Steve shrugged “But she’s also excited. I mean of course she’s nervous to leave her family behind but she knows it’s too good an opportunity to pass up on, and it won’t be forever. Probably about 5 years or so and we’ll head back home.” “I wouldn’t bet on it.” Frank said, knocking back his scotch.
“Why’s that?” Steve asked, his voice coming out as a slight mumble as he held his cigarette between his lips so he could top Frank’s glass up again.
“Well-cheers-“ Frank nodded, taking the tumbler off him “-it’s like Fliss said, once this place gets it’s claws into you, you kinda grow to love it.”
Steve chuckled and dropped his now done dab end onto the floor under his foot before he bent down and retrieved it, slipping it into his pocket to dispose of later.
“So, Fliss told you that we got family coming out this New Year?” Steve asked.
“She mentioned one of her cousins…” Frank paused “Tabs was it?”
“Babs.” Steve corrected “We got 4, there’s Eva who’s married to a Police Officer called Ari, Jen who’s married to a lawyer called Andy and Amber who is married to Curtis…” “He the train mechanic?” Frank racked his memory and Steve nodded.
“Yeah, they all still live in Liverpool but Babs, the one that’s coming…she’s something else.” Steve snorted. “She lives in Australia with a photographer called Hugh. Well, I say photographer, he’s kind of a trust fund rich boy that plays at it, you know? Nice enough guy though, always happy to shout you on a night out.”
“So they making a special trip over or…” “They’re taking some kind of sabbatical, if you can take a sabbatical from doing fuck all.” Steve shrugged “6 month tour of the US starting here. She’s fucking great fun though. Her and Fliss are the same age and were thick as thieves growing up, used to get into all sorts of mischief.” He shook his head. “They once set fire to a bin on a park. By accident mind. They were pretending to smoke these hollow twig things stuffed with dried grass and when one set on fire Babs panicked and tossed it into the bin.” Frank snorted as Steve continued.
“The whole thing went up.” Steve chuckled “So they legged it and got followed home by an off duty copper. Dad and Uncle Ted went ballistic…
“Wait…your dad’s brother is called Ted?” Frank asked.
“Yeah, Bill and Ted.” Steve grinned. Frank looked at him, before the pair of them burst out laughing, and couldn’t stop. It wasn’t that funny, it really wasn’t, but the more Steve laughed, the more Frank did, and the more Frank laughed, the more Steve died. By the time Frank managed to control himself he had tears of pure mirth in his eyes and he wiped them as his laughter subsided and he managed to take a breath, clutching at his side.
“What you two laughing at?” Fliss asked, stepping outside.
“Your face.” Steve shot back.
“Twat.” Fliss narrowed her eyes at him and she turned to Frank who was still chuckling “And I don’t know what you find so funny…”
“Nothing at all baby.” He smirked, dropping a kiss to her head, “Nothing at all.” ******
There were sore heads in the Adler household the next day. They’d stayed at Bill and Verity’s till well past midnight, and had left Mary there as she’d passed out asleep with the twins in the movie room. After they’d managed to herd all the kids to bed, the adults had continued drinking and eventually called it a night when Bill had fallen asleep in his arm chair, dropping his glass of brandy all over the floor.
Fliss had stable duties that morning, and took off early even though she felt she was still half drunk and when she returned a few hours later Frank and Evelyn were sat at the breakfast bar, each nursing cups of coffee and looking half dead. Eventually they all managed to muster enough about themselves to shower, dress and head over to pick Mary up. Frank was low-key pleased to see Steve looked worse than he felt and after a quick coffee they set off into the little town to have a walk round the Christmas Stalls that had been set up before they grabbed a bite to eat and Evelyn started telling Fliss a few stories about Frank and Diane when they had been children at Christmas.
“I think my personal favourite will be the carol service when you were 6.” Evelyn looked at Frank and he groaned taking a sip of his soda as he leaned back in his chair “He has a lovely voice you know and that year he was selected to do a solo.” “We don’t need to hear this…” Frank started to protest but Fliss cut him off.
“Yes we do, go on Evelyn.”
“So his particular hymn was Hark, the Herald Angels Sing. And the line ‘God and sinners reconciled’ was proving a little tricky for him as he rehearsed.”
“I was 6.” Frank deadpanned.
“I’m well aware, it still doesn’t stop it being funny.” Evelyn grinned “So up he gets, sings out the song note and word perfect until he gets to this line and belts out ‘God and sinners dressed in style’”
Fliss snorted and Mary let out a howl of laughter.
“You’re such a loser” she looked at him
“Quit it or you’ll be getting no presents tomorrow morning.”
“Whatever”
“Hey, do you remember that year grandpa sent us nothing?” Frank suddenly had a recollection and he looked at Evelyn who let out a loud laugh.
“God yes, you and Diane were disgusted!”
“Oh, the last year before he died-“ Frank started to explain as Fliss looked at him blankly “-well, he was clearly feeling his age and found that shopping for Christmas gifts had become too difficult. So he decided to send checks to everyone instead. In each card he wrote, ‘Buy your own present!’ and mailed them early. Only when we opened them, there was no check…he’d forgotten to enclose them with the cards.”
“So you all literally got a card with ‘buy your own present’ written inside?” Fliss laughed and Frank chuckled
“Yeah, which to be fair dad thought was hilarious but…poor Grandpa was devastated. He tried to blame Santa, of course, but it didn’t wash.”
“That’s because Santa isn’t real.” Mary looked at him.
“Yes he is.” Fliss sighed “I’m not having this debate with you again.”
“You said yourself the other day that Frank was incapable of organising anything because he was a man so how could one dude organise gifts for the entire world?” Mary looked at her and Frank turned his head slowly to Fliss.
“Oh, you did, did you?”
Fliss hesitated, before she sighed “Come on, your organisational skills at home are ridiculous.”
“Do our bills get paid on time?”
“Yes, but-“
“Has Alex died yet?”
“No…” Fliss laughed.
“Then we’re good!” Frank shrugged, his hand gently dropping to his son’s tummy as he lay asleep in the stroller parked next to him “I find your lack of faith disturbing. And if we’re being sexist, I know Santa is a man as a woman wouldn’t be able to hack driving a sleigh around for a night, not to mention the complete mess she’d make trying to park it…”
“Wow!” Fliss looked at him as he laughed, “Ok, buddy, I bed I can think of 5 reasons why I would jump at the chance to be Santa.”
“Go on.” He teased and Fliss held up her hand, counting on her fingers as she spoke.
“One, I could grow to the size of Hawaii knowing it’s simply all part of the job. Two, I’d simply be able to buy one big, black belt, and brass buckle, and be accessorized for life. Three there would be no reason to have my hair colour done. Four, everyone would be extremely nice to me, regardless of my behaviour and five, if people commented that my belly jiggled when I laughed I could hit them with my purse.”
“Six…” Evelyn picked up as Frank laughed “You would always work in sensible footwear”
Frank shook his head “She always is anyway, not like you wear high heels to ride horses in and muck out stalls…”
“Those boots hurt when they’re not worn in.” Mary jabbed back “I know.”
With a snort Frank leaned back and looked down at Alex “Buddy, you better hurry up and start talking, I need someone here to even out the numbers.”
After another hour or so, when it was dark, they headed home and Evelyn bid them all a good night, heading to her guest suite above the garage to read and relax, declining their offer to join them for a drink stating she’d had quite enough the night before.
Mary wasn’t far behind, the excitement of the last few days having wiped her out, plus as she reminded Frank and Fliss, the sooner she went to bed the sooner it would be present time. She headed off for a bath before she settled down with her book upstairs and an hour or so later Frank went up to took her in, finding her fast asleep with Fred curled around her head.
It wasn’t even 8:30 pm and Fliss and Frank were all set for the evening. Presents wrapped, kids settled, and Frank had just moved to grab them a beer each when his phone sounded in his pocket.  He glanced at the shitty Nokia he was being forced to use after smashing his Samsung against the wall and frowned.
“It’s Greg.” He said before he answered. “Hey man.”
“S’up, listen, you guys free if I pop in for 5? I got a Christmas card for you and I forgot to drop it off earlier.”
“Yeah, sure.” Frank chuckled. “Just come on round the back, gate and the door are open.”
“No worries pal, see you in 15.”
“He coming over?” Fliss asked as Frank tossed the phone down on the side.
“Yeah, just for 5 minutes. Says he has a card for us.” “A card?”
“Yeah, you know what Zara’s like. He’s probably had it for weeks and forgotten about it.” Franks shrugged, passing Fliss an open beer as they both crossed to the sofa. They settled down to watch the Christmas special of Brooklyn 99 and true to his word, Greg walked in 15 minutes or so later.
“Hey Greg, you want a beer?” Frank stood up, gesturing to the kitchen area.
“No I can’t stay, I just wanted to give you this before tomorrow.”
Frank paused and took the envelope off him. “This isn’t a card?” he frowned.
“No, it’s a little better than that.” Greg beamed as Fliss rose to her feet, crossing to where Frank was stood. With a frown, Frank turned the envelope over, opened it and as his eyes scanned the piece of paper he felt his mouth grow dry and his heart suddenly pounded so hard he felt it was going to thump right out of his chest.
“He signed the papers…” Frank whispered, swallowing as he looked at the document in his hands. “Lissy, Polland…he signed the adoption papers.”
“What?” Fliss breathed out as she took it from him, her eyes roving the wording before she looked at Frank, then Greg. “I- when?”
“I had a call earlier this afternoon saying they were dropping the objection.” Greg smiled. “Seems he suddenly had a change of heart when his Attorney told him he was on tape confessing to taking a bung and attempting to blackmail Fliss. I won’t tell you what he called him, it was a 4 letter word and ended in t…pretty sure you can fill in the gaps.” He nodded to the paper in Fliss hand “I asked him to hurry that through and it arrived about half an hour before I called. I wanted to give it to you in person.”
“So…we don’t need to go to court?” Frank breathed out, his eyes brimming with tears.
Greg shook his head “There’ll be a finalisation hearing in January but coupled with that and the CWD report it’s gonna simply be a formality. It’s as good as done.” “So, we’re…” Fliss took a deep breath “We’re gonna be her parents?”
Greg nodded. “Yup.”
Frank was struggling for words as he looked at his best friend before he pulled him into a huge bro hug. He stepped back, wiping his eyes as Fliss moved forward to hug Greg too, before they both walked him to his car.
“I owe you, big time.” Frank croaked and Greg waved him away as he opened the door to his Merc.
“I told you it would work out.” He shrugged, smiling broadly. “Merry Christmas guys.”
The two of them waved him off before Fliss turned to Frank, her tears falling down her cheeks “I can’t believe it…” “Me neither.” Frank spluttered and Fliss leaped into his arms, the pair of them laughing in sheer joy. Even thought they’d thrown themselves into the holiday spirit, neither of them had been able to shake that little feeling that a small, dark cloud was still following them. And now that was gone.
It was over. All over. And they’d won.
They headed back inside, both resisting the urge to wake Mary to tell her, deciding they’d leave it for the morning, but they absolutely did decide to crack a bottle of champagne open.
And then Frank had an even better idea, one that came to him on a whim as they walked back through their garden. Silently he disappeared into the little laundry room at the side of the kitchen and when he emerged, Fliss had her back to him so she didn’t see him deposit the 2 pool towels on the breakfast bar. He moved to where she reaching for two champagne flutes, and as she stood on her tiptoes, he wrapped his arms around her from behind causing her to jump a little.
“I can’t believe it.” Fliss whispered “I mean I hoped he’d back down but…”
“I know” Frank kissed her neck tenderly “Another huge Christmas Eve huh? Second one in a row?”
Yeah.” She sighed happily, her hands falling on top of his arms, rubbing gently. “You know last year I was so nervous when I found out I was pregnant.”
“So was I, and that was before you told me that bit of news.” He smiled, his chin resting on her shoulder. “I’d been trying to propose for ages. I was shitting my pants it was gonna go wrong or you’d turn me down.”
“Not a chance Sailor.” She turned her head to look at him. “You’re stuck with me.” He pressed a kiss to her lips and the pair of them stood in silence in their kitchen, lost in their own thoughts, simply looking out of the window over their garden which was illuminated softly by the lighting round the pool area. Eventually Frank remembered his original plan and he smiled to himself.
“So all the presents are wrapped, everyone’s in bed waiting for the big guy with the sack to arrive…” Frank muttered, his lips grazing her neck “The pool heaters have been on all day…what about a Christmas Eve dip?”
Fliss turned in his arms, arching an eyebrow “Would you merely be trying to get me naked Francis?”
“Yes.” He nodded and she giggled.
“Skinny dipping? On Christmas Eve?”
“You lost your sense of adventure Cowgirl?” he teased.
Fliss peered round him to where Alex was sleeping in the basinet and with a grin pulled back and whipped off her T-shirt. “Does that answer your question?”
Frank laughed and caught the top as she threw it at him, tossing it to the side as he grabbed the towels. By the time he caught up with her outside Fliss was on the edge of the pool in nothing but her baby-blue cotton panties and his eyes scanned up her legs and the rest of her body until they locked onto hers. She bit her lip as she stepped out of her underwear and Frank felt his cock twitch as she turned and coyly shot him a look over her shoulder before she descended down the mosaic tiled steps at the shallow end of the pool.  
Not wanting to waste a second more he threw the towels down on one of the sun loungers and reached over his head, grabbing a fistful of his grey t-shirt. He pulled it off before be quickly undid his belt and in one swoop yanked down his loose jeans and boxers.
Fliss dropped off the bottom step, her shoulders dipping under the warm water as she turned to watch Frank following her in, her eyes trailing up from his knees over his thighs, semi-erect cock which stood beneath that happy trail that led down his slim, flat yet ever so slightly soft stomach and up to his broad shoulders and strong arms. Her eyes moved to his handsome face, the stubble on his jaw line always gave him a more rugged look and his short hair was spiked up messily as it usually was at the end of the day.
Fuck, he was beautiful. 
And not just on the outside. Even before the events of the last few weeks Fliss knew her man was the most caring, wonderful and doting father and lover on the planet but since the issue with Polland had raised its head she'd seen a side to him that she had only ever caught glimpses of before. A softer, vulnerable side and it filled her heart with even more love for him for reasons she couldn't explain other than it just did. He wasn't afraid to show weakness to her, he wasn't ashamed to tell her his fears. Because they were a true partnership. And as she watched him crouch down so his body was submerged in the water, his eyes sparkling in the lights, she felt an unnerving spike of desire that was so strong it surged right from her toes up her body, leaving her slightly fuzzy headed, like she was drunk on love. 
Frank cocked his head playfully to the side as Fliss gracefully pushed off the ball of her foot and swam towards him before she twisted in the water slightly and brought her legs out in front of her. She wrapped them round his waist, settling herself on his lap as his large hands gently splayed on her back. Fliss nuzzled her nose against his chin, nudging his head back so she could chain soft kisses across his jaw line, her lips skating the bristles on his face as she gently nipped at his skin. Frank let out a soft sigh, his hands pulling her closer as she moved her affections down his neck, over his Adam’s apple before she gently sucked at the junction of his shoulder and neck, grinding down on him, her bare core slicking over his cock.
"Fuck, Liss..." he stuttered, pulling back to look at her, the water sloshing around them "What's got into you, huh?"
"Nothing yet." She purred back.
Frank looked at her, but before he could make a smart reply she’d dropped her hand from his shoulder into the pool and wrapped her palm around him making him choke on his words slightly as she stroked him with a few quick flicks of her wrist.
“Jesus, baby…” he managed to croak as her eyes locked onto his and a smirk curled on her lips. She leaned forwards, her teeth nipping at his ear and he gave a soft groan, his head falling back slightly as she continued to work him, her hand pumping up and down his now rock hard dick. And then she stopped, and he felt her mouth curve open and her breath was hot on his skin as she whispered 3 words that sent red hot fire coursing through his entire body.
“Fuck me, Sailor.”
He didn’t need asking twice. 
Fliss moved herself, guiding him to where she wanted and she sank down onto his length, his hands grabbing her hips as she took him in completely, a low, drawn out gasp escaping her lips as Frank hissed slightly as her walls clamped around him. He gave himself a moment, enjoying the feel of her before he thrust upwards, his fingers curling around her soft flesh as he drew back slowly, before pushing back into her deeply, rotating his hips. Fliss’ hands curled around his shoulders, her head tipping back, eyes closed in pleasure, the action causing her breasts to rise out of the water. Keeping his rhythm slow and deep he dipped his head, his tongue tracing a stripe down her cleavage, the salty tang of the pool water hitting his taste buds as he directed his attention to her nipple, flicking and sucking softly, all the time listening and feeling her reactions as she pushed down further against him, desperate for more. For whatever reason, Fliss was in a downright filthy mood and Frank had a feeling that slow and steady wasn’t going to be enough. He moved his mouth, nipping up her neck before his lips pressed onto hers, the kiss filthy as his tongue fucked her mouth and he pulled back as he began to back himself up to the side of the pool.
With a quick movement he turned so Fliss’s back was against the tiled edge, and he looked at her as she stared at him, her deep brown eyes wide with lust as he dipped his head to kiss her again.
“Turn around.” He instructed, his voice low and Fliss complied, moving off him and spinning in the water. One large hand slid up her spine to her neck and his fingers gently curled around her nape as he pushed her forwards slightly, before he slid both his hands up her arms and directed her hands to grip at the lip of the pool.
Fliss’ body was tingling with anticipation. Her palms gripped round the rough surface of the pool edge as she surrendered to Frank’s control, his chest pressing against her back, lips sucking at her neck.
“If this is too much, tell me…” he whispered against her skin. Fliss tilted her face round to look at him, seeing those ocean blues she loved shining with love and what looked like a slight glimmer of concern. And she knew why. Whilst their sex was hot, passionate, loving, it was very rarely rough because he didn’t want to push her too far knowing her past. But she wanted this, she needed it. She smiled at him, pressing her lips to his.
“I trust you.” She promised him gently and Frank kissed her again before he pulled away. His hands gripped her hips, lifting her ass up so her feet planted on the floor of the pool as he rose to his, the water lapping around his thighs as he buried himself into her with one swift movement. He pulled out slowly before he thrust back, bottoming out as she gasped, her head tilting backwards as he continued rocking his hips back and forth, slowly at first, his movements gathering pace until he built up into a fast, relentless rhythm, every drive into her jolting her forwards slightly as she braced herself against the edge with her arms, elbows locked to absorb the shock. Pants, whimpers, soft cries and the debauched sound of sloshing and skin slapping skin filled the otherwise silent night air of the garden and Frank dropped his eyes to the point where he was pounding in and out of his girl, the sight of where they were joined was hot as fuck and he let out a groan as he watched for a second, before his eyes flicked back up to Fliss. Her head was dropped between her arms, slightly twisted to the right and he could see her eyes were closed, jaw slack, full lips open in a silent cry.
As he continued his powerful, fast thrusts, his cock brushed occasionally against that spot inside and Fliss felt the coil in her belly beginning to tighten slowly, each time he hit it. Frank adjusted his stance and bent over, his right hand falling over hers as he too braced himself against the edge of the pool, giving a dirty grind and Fliss cried out loudly at the sensation.
“Fuck, right there…” she encouraged and Frank repeated the movement again, his bottom lip caught between his teeth as he was fighting the urge he was feeling to cum.
“Liss, shit...” He gasped, his left hand dropping between her legs, coaxing her clit and after a few strong strokes Fliss arched her back, her head following as she let out a cry of his name as the world tilted on its axis, her orgasm rocking her to her very core. The feeling was too much for Frank and with a loud moan that rumbled from his chest he followed her right over the edge, his thrusts growing sloppy as he pumped through his own release before he stilled, his head bowing as he waited for the surge of ecstasy to dissipate.
Eventually the fog lifted enough so that he was able to bend his knees slightly, and with the arm that was curled around Fliss’ waist he turned them in the water. Fliss was near dead weight and went with him obligingly, his cock still buried in her as he pivoted and dropped down so that his back was against the wall of the pool and she sat on his lap, the water gently splashing around their shoulders.
Frank cradled her close, pressing a kiss to her neck as he gave a low hum of satisfaction, her head falling back against his shoulder, a smile flickering across her lips.
“You know…” Frank mumbled after a little moment of silence “Cowgirls will always be my favourite, even in reverse.”
Fliss gave a soft chuckle as she opened her eyes and titled her head to look at him. “I prefer sailors…” she smirked and he laughed, pressing his lips to hers.
“You ok?” he asked, as her hands fell over his arms, fingers softly skating up his wet skin and she gave a nod.
“Never better.” She affirmed.
“Good.” He kissed her temple. “You wanna get out or…”
“No, I’m good here for a while.” She purred and he smiled, his mouth dropping to her shoulder where he pressed another kiss to her skin.
Eventually Fliss reluctantly conceded that they probably should get out as Alex would want feeding again any time soon. But, not wanting the moment to end, Frank suggested that whilst she showered he could do the feed and light the fire-pit. Fliss agreed and after wrapping herself in a towel she kissed him again and headed upstairs. Frank dried himself off, located his T-shirt and shrugged it on, leaving the towel round his waist as he warmed a bottle for his now grumbling son. By the time Fliss came back down stairs in her plaid sleep pants and tank, Alex was just finishing up. Frank passed him over, and they both headed back outside. Once the fire was lit Frank scooted off for a quick shower and returned 10 minutes later to find Alex settled once more in the basinet, tucked snuggly under his Christmas blanket that was decorated with little Santa’s and trees, his eyes roaming the starry sky.  Fliss sat with her legs under a tartan fleece on the outside sofa, the bottle of champagne stood in the middle of the table in an ice bucket and either side of it rested two full flutes. With a satisfied sigh Frank sat next to her, reaching for his drink and resting his feet on the table as Fliss snuggled under his arm. The pair of them clinked their glasses together, shared another soft kiss and settled into a soft chatter.
It was cosy, domestic, loving, and everything Fliss had ever dreamed of having, but never in a million years thinking she’d experience, and as they sat talking and laughing, speculating about Mary’s reaction to the news of her adoption being tomorrow, she felt herself suddenly choked with emotion and she sat up, looking at her man.
“I think she’s gonna...” Frank trailed off, frowning at the look on Fliss’ face “Hey, honey what’s wrong?”
“Absolutely nothing.” She muttered, clambering onto his lap so she was straddling him, jolting the glass he was holding a little and sending some of the Moet spilling onto the patio.
“You sure?” he titled his head to look at her and she nodded, sniffing back her tears as she kissed him, her hands running through his messy hair.
“I’m just so happy Frank, I can’t stop thinking about how much I lucked out.” She whispered as she pulled away and Frank smiled against her mouth.
“I think I’m the one that lucked out.” He whispered, his spare hand reaching up to smooth her hair back slightly.
“Maybe we can agree we’re both lucky bastards” she grinned and he chuckled, his eyes locking onto hers.
“I can live with that.” He agreed.
******
For the second day in a row Frank and Fliss woke with hangovers, as post the champagne they hit the bourbon and didn’t go to bed until 2 am. Now it was half 6 and Frank wasn’t impressed that he was going to have to deal with a hyper 9 year old who was currently bouncing on his bed, a 16 week old and his mother with a headache and only 4 and a half hours sleep.
After they sat and opened the gifts in their stocking, Frank telling Fliss to leave the thin, flat box until she was alone, they headed downstairs. Frank grinned at Fliss as Mary bust into the family room and glanced at the presents which were arranged in a pile by the sofa. The three of them exchanged their gifts, Fliss being especially delighted with her Spa Day voucher from Mary and Alex, which Frank informed her Simon had also gotten one for Bonnie so they could go together. Frank had also bought her a few new pairs of riding breeches, signed her up for a year’s subscription to Kindle Unlimited, a few more items of clothing, a 3 Pandora charms in the shape of the letters, F, M and A meaning she had one for them all and a stunning silver and diamond necklace and earring set from Tiffany’s which Fliss gasped at when she opened. In contrast Fliss had bought Frank a new phone from Alex and Mary to replace the one he’d smashed against the wall, a few T-shirts and then cryptically told him the biggest gift from her was yet to come.
“You’re not pregnant again are you?” he leaned over and asked her semi-seriously.
“Fuck, no!” she spluttered and he let out the breath he hadn’t realised he’d been holding. “It’s just a little big…you’ll see.”
Before he could press her any further, Mary gave a loud shriek as she unwrapped the hooded top that was decorated the same as her Gillet and grinned, jamming it on over her pyjama top. Frank laughed as she did a parade in front of them before she paused, looking at the door to the little room off the kitchen. Frank had covered over the door frame in wrapping paper as it held her big present and Mary looked at it, before she turned to Frank and Fliss, frowning.
“What’s that?”
“Dunno.” Frank teased “Why don’t you go through and see?”
Mary looked at the pair of them again before she ran over, her reindeer slippers padding over the floor and she tore through the paper, pushing the door open.
Frank curled his arm round Fliss, kissed the side of her head as they followed her into the room where Mary was stood, gaping around.
As a surprise they’d turned it into a little sitting room of sorts for her. Over the last 4 weeks they had meticulously emptied it of the crap that had been in there since they’d moved in and they’d completely re-decorated it. Frank had painted a pale yellow on 3 of the walls, the 4th at the back was papered with a huge picture of Monty in the pasture. Her show rosettes were hung on a trellis which Frank had screwed to the wall with plenty of space for more and on the shelving unit which housed a large, flat screen Tv, Blu-ray player and Android box were positioned a few photos of various family shots. To finish the room off, 2 huge bean bags were placed in the middle of the room which were big enough for Fliss and Frank to lie in (they'd had a lot of fun trying them out) and there was a small desk in the corner along with an office chair. But it was the electronic keyboard nestled in the corner of the wall that held the TV that caught Mary’s eye.
As Fred sauntered in and hopped up on a bean bag as if he owned the place, Mary walked over to the keyboard running her hands along it before she turned to look at the two adults, her mouth hanging open.
“We thought you might like a place to hang out or chillax or whatever it is you kids do now...” Frank smiled “You know, instead of always needing to go to your room when Rosie or whoever comes over. You can study in here too as well.”
“And trust me you'll want your own space once this monster starts crawling.” Fliss smiled, readjusting Alex in her arms slightly.
“I love it…” Mary gasped, looking around her eyes brimming “My own special living room…and a sort of piano.”
“Well, you keep up your lessons with Nanny V and we might, and I mean might, get you a real one” Frank smiled and Mary beamed at him before she shot over to the pair of them. Frank picked her up with a groan and kissed her cheek.
“Rosie is gonna be well jel.” She giggled and Frank laughed as Mary leaned over to kiss Fliss’ cheek.
“There’s something in the desk for you too.” Frank took a deep breath, setting Mary down on the floor. As she walked over the room, Frank moved, his arm hooking round Fliss’ waist as they watched her open the lid of the desk and take out the envelope. With a frown she pulled it open and her eyes widened as she looked at the detail.
“Is this…” she started breathing deeply, her gaze shooting up to Frank’s, her eyes filling with tears “He…”
Frank nodded, his own eyes pricking with tears “Yeah, he signed the papers Stack.”
“So, I’m…I’m adopted?” she stuttered.
“Not quite but…” Frank sniffed, “It’s about as good as done, yeah. Greg got those yesterday.”
As Mary looked back down at the paper in her hand, Frank spotted a tear fall from her face and then he frowned as he saw her legs starting to shake. In a flash he was by her side, catching her as she dropped to her knees. She wrapped her arms around his neck, the paper scrunching slightly in her hand as she buried her face into the crook of his neck and began to cry.
Frank pressed his face into her hair, trying desperately to keep his own tears from falling but failing miserably. Fliss was already gone, and she moved to walk towards them, dropping gently to her knees, Alex held safely in her arms.
“We’re gonna be a proper family.” Mary sobbed and Frank stuttered a laugh as he pulled back to look down at her.
“Mary, sweetheart, we already were.” His voice cracked and she nodded against his neck, before she started to cry again. At that point Thor walked into the room and pushed his nose straight in between Mary and Frank, licking her face and letting out soft little whines.
Mary giggled and grabbed his fur gently “Thor, get off you doofus…”
“Is everything ok?” a voice made all of them look up to see Evelyn in the doorway, wrapped in a dressing gown and slippers. Frank, who had momentarily forgotten he’d text her to come join them, looked up through his tears and nodded. Fliss took the paper out of Mary’s hand and held it out to Evelyn. She gently gripped it, her eyebrows raised slightly, and then her hand flew to her mouth when she read the writing.
“Oh, that’s….that’s fantastic!” she sniffed, “Really…”
Mary, whose sobs had now subsided suddenly pulled back from Frank and looked at Fliss, “We need to give Frank his present!”
“Yup, we do!”
“Yeah, what…” Frank frowned “I’m kinda scared about this you know.” “Oh trust me, you’re gonna LOVE it!” Mary grinned, before she stood up straight.
“Why don’t you let me watch Alex whilst you head out?” Evelyn smiled and Fliss handed him over to his grandmother before the three of them headed to the hallway. Fliss fished the garage keys off the hooks by the door and tossed them to Frank who caught them in his right hand.
“You’re gonna need those” she smiled. Frank arched an eyebrow as he shoved on his sneakers but didn’t say anything as they headed out into the December sun, making their way over the drive.
“Is something gonna jump out at me?” he paused, the keys in the door.
“No.” Mary grinned. With one final, suspicious look at them he flung the up-and-over door open and stopped dead as he looked into the now full space of the double garage, his mouth hanging open.
In front of him was a fairly large boat. It had a covered lower deck area which housed the main engine and cockpit and a large, open flat stern area with benches. It was old, and in need of a fuck tonne of work but Frank was absolutely over the moon.
“Holy…you…you bought me a boat?” he turned to Fliss who grinned and nodded.
“I suppose technically I bought us a boat, but…” she shrugged as Frank moved over to examine it. He ran his hands over the hull, which was sound enough considering the state the rest of it was in and he turned to Fliss, his handsome face splitting into a huge smile.  
“It’s a wreck, I love it!” he beamed and Fliss grinned as he took her face in both hands and kissed her “Thank you baby.” “Well I thought about getting a newer one but I know you’ve always wanted to do your own up” she smiled as he pulled away “Plus, from a purely selfish point of view, I’m kinda looking forward to seeing you full of grease again.”
He grinned and arched an eyebrow before he kissed her again and Mary made a gagging noise. He turned to her, playfully swatting at her head and the 3 of them made their way back to the house, Frank casting a loving glance at his newest prized possession before he pulled the door down and locked it.
They exchanged gifts with Evelyn over breakfast, both Mary and Alex’s piles in the living room were significantly larger when they finished opening the bags full each and then following a breakfast of pancakes and bacon which was made whilst dancing around the kitchen to various Christmas songs, Fliss and Mary headed over to the yard to see to the horses and sneak a quick ride in before they needed to head over to Bill and Verity’s.
Fliss opted to shower first so she could get Alex ready and once she was alone she took her time to open the present Frank had told her to leave until later. As she pulled off the wrapping paper she smiled to herself as she saw the Victoria Secrets box and lifted the lid off, gently pulling back the pink tissue wrapping. Biting her lip she pulled out the sheer gold negligee, which was beautiful and rather classy as well, before she placed it back in the box and headed into the bathroom.
Just as she’d finished dressing Frank walked into their room, Alex in his arms and he smiled, pressing his lips to hers.
“I opened it…” Fliss smiled against his mouth.
“Yeah?”
“Mmmhmmm” she affirmed “I happen to think I suit gold.”
Frank smiled “I’m sure you do.”
She grinned and took Alex off him before she headed out of the room, Frank watching her go before he stripped off his clothing and headed into the bathroom.
20 minutes or so later, dressed casually in a pair of jeans and a red and blue flannel button down, Frank wandered into the family room and stopped dead as he caught sight of Alex’s outfit.
“Lissy, what the fuck is my boy wearing?” Frank stared at the baby who was sat on Mary’s knee on the sofa, dressed in a green elf onesie. It had a black strip round the middle with a little yellow belt buckle detail, and the collar was red and ruffled. The legs were red and white hooped, just like tights, and on his head sat a red and green hat. As Frank stared at him in disbelief, Alex gazed up at his dad and let out a loud excited noise and waved his hands and legs.
“He looks cute, Frank.” Mary grinned, herself dressed in a white little blouse detailed with christmas patterns. Fliss walked over from the kitchen where she had been boxing up the sugar cookies she had made and grinned as Frank glared at her, pointing to Alex.
“He’s a fucking elf.” He deadpanned. “In tights.”
“Language.” Fliss slapped his arm lightly before she shrugged and gestured to her own Christmas sweater which depicted Santa stuck upside down in a chimney “It’s Christmas.” Frank shook his head. “He looks ridiculous.”
“Don’t be a scrooge.” Mary grinned and Frank shot her a glare, before he glanced at his son again, shaking his head. Alex seemed absolutely nonplussed at the fact his Mother had dressed him in the utterly stupid get up and Frank turned, shaking his head as Fliss smirked at him.
“Everyone is gonna laugh at him.” He pouted and Fliss snorted
“No they’re not!”
Frank knew he wasn’t going to win the argument, Fliss was as big a child as anyone when it came to Christmas, but he was damned if he was going to let his boy be the subject of ridicule without a fight. But whatever protest he had left died in his throat as at that point Evelyn walked back into the room, a few more gift bags in her hands for Fliss’ family and Roberta and let out a little chuckle.
“Oh my God, doesn’t he look adorable.” She clapped her hands and walked towards her grandson.
Fliss bit her lip, her shoulders shaking with laughter at the utter indignation on Frank’s face as he rolled his eyes, letting out an exasperated growl as she slid her arms up round his neck. 
“Fine, just…whatever.” He sighed as she pulled his head down to hers, catching his lips in a soft peck. “Poor kid’s gonna grow up with a complex” he mumbled against her mouth “First the dinosaur outfit at Halloween, now this…”
“Well, so he doesn’t feel too bad, I got you a matching jumper.”
“Yeah Frank, you can put it on and then we can all take an elfie with your new phone, geddit?” Mary grinned and Fliss snorted. Frank pulled back and glared at Mary “Over my dead body.” “Can be arranged.” She retorted, and at that Fliss and Evelyn burst into laughter.
“Well that’s just mean.” Frank pouted and Fliss grinned, standing on her tiptoes.
“I’ll make it up to you later Sailor.” She whispered, her lips brushing his ear “I’ll let you decide if gold really is my colour for yourself…”
“Yeah?” he asked, arching an eyebrow, his hands dropping to her hips.
“If you wear the sweater…” “That’s…that’s blackmail.” He narrowed his eyes.
“I know.” She pulled back, turning to Mary and Evelyn. “Ok, shall we load the cars up? Mary you wanna ride with me or Frank?”
“Who’s goin’ to get Roberta?”
“Frank.” Fliss said “I’m taking Alex and Thor…and Fred.” She added as an after-thought. “Then I’ll go with him.” She nodded “That ok?”
“Sure.” Fliss smiled, her hand dropping to Mary’s head.
There was a sudden, excited bustle around the room as everyone moved to get their things together…and Frank went upstairs to change into his new elf sweater.
***** Chapter 18
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scarlettrose0 · 3 years
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On Anon
There is no point in posting anon hate, I won’t answer it. Instead do you and me a favor and block me, you are not obligated to see my posts. Please ask me on anything you want, especially on abortion as I am admittedly very interested in that topic.
On What This Blog Is About
This blog is mainly as mentioned above, about abortion, the shows I am currently watching, mainly anime specifically. As, well as art, as well as controversial topics.
Pro-Life Responses To Pro-Choice Arguments
On sentience and personhood ~ https://scarlettrose0.tumblr.com/post/657559401237037056/2a-continuous-properties
On pro-life people just being pro-birth, and the differences between foster care and adoption, (and to me this argument is an red herring, but it’s so common I put it here) ~ https://scarlettrose0.tumblr.com/post/657479339834753024/foster-care
On it just being a clump of cells, fetal tissue, etc ~ https://blog.secularprolife.org/2021/07/responding-to-common-pro-choice-tactic.html?m=1
My pro-life essay referring to any other pro-choice argument ~ https://scarlettrose0.tumblr.com/post/65752688675220684 The effects of pro-choice culture, and how it leads to men being able to leave parenthood just as women are able to, as well as leading towards an weird relationship of how we view unborn babies or rather, not knowing their worth ~https://blog.secularprolife.org/2021/01/our-cultural-gaslighting-of-women-who.html?m=1
~https://blog.secularprolife.org/2011/05/roe-v-wade-for-men.html?m=1
Also, if your a pregnant women who needs help who are the cons and pros of pregnancy crisis centers, (good luck btw):
If you are choosing to carry your child, and need help. I hope all goes well, an CPC is, if you don’t know.
”...sometimes called a pregnancy resource center (PRC),[1]is a type of nonprofit organization established to persuade pregnant women against having an abortion.[2][3]:1[4] CPCs generally provide peer counseling related to abortion, pregnancy, and childbirth, and may also offer additional non-medical services such as financial assistance, child-rearing resources, and adoption referrals.[5][6][7] CPCs that qualify as medical clinics may also provide pregnancy testing, sonograms, and other services.[8]However, CPCs have also frequently been found to disseminate false medical information, usually about the supposed physical and mental health risks of abortion,[9][10][11] but sometimes also about the effectiveness of condoms and the prevention of sexually transmitted infections.[12]”
Some provide misinformation, I don’t support that. I only want the best for you and your child. Good luck.
Also * I copy pasted these lists from other posts.
Let Them Live will pay for your bills during and after your pregnancy GetYourCare to find a clinic near you Baby2Baby and HopeSupplyCo for baby supplies Adoption Medicaid Medicare Find a low cost community health clinic near you Find a Title X clinic near you (confidential reproductive health care for teens and adults) International: Birthright International Choice42 Worldwide directory of pregnancy centers
Pregnancy help
Life begins at conception.
And the leading cause of abortion is lack of support, resources, and finances.
You have alternatives.
Crisis Talk Lines:
OptionLine
RealAlternatives
AllOptions
Get Immediate Mental Help
Domestic Abuse Helpline
Sexual Assault Pregnancy Help
Financial Aid and Social Services:
Women, Infants, Children Aid (any guardian can apply)
Temporary Assistance for Needy Families
SNAP
Other government benefits
Let Them Live (financial aid for pregnant women)
Women Deserve Better
Pregnant in College Rights
Carrying a terminally sick baby to term
International pregnancy help
Check Baby2Baby and HopeSupplyCo for free baby supplies
Healthcare:
Find a low cost health clinic near you
Find a TitleX clinic near you
Children’s Health Insurance Program
Get Your Care (find low cost or free pregnancy care near you)
Medicaid
List of international pregnancy centers which offer pregnancy care and social services
Adoption:
Adopt Help (finances birth moms)
How to start an adoption plan
Finding an agency
Open Adoption
Emotional Support
Parenting:
Department of Health Resources for Parents
National Parent Helpline
Diaper Banks
Single Mothers by Choice
To locate PCC, please see here:
https://crisispregnancycentermap.com
I wouldn’t go to an PCC for an Sex-Ed, but there not completely useless. Please, use them the best of your abilities.
I understand some are against PCC but they do more good then bad. Abortion places provide that——abortions. They help the mother by providing ultra sounds, Planned Parenthood thankfully is run by professionals but as much as those that are biased against abortion. Planned Parenthood is literally just as biased, especially against pro-life people. A good bit of them don’t even provide ultrasounds, see here: https://youtu.be/CHGOBkX2esU, they aren’t ”innocent“ either considering that their founder used eugenics and wanted to lower the black population and used PP for that. They’ve also been found to sell baby parts, etc.
https://www.centerformedicalprogress.org/2020/05/planned-parenthood-testimony-on-selling-baby-parts-unsealed-new-videos-released/
they do however provide free birth control and condoms, STD testing, etc. But pregnancy crisis centers they also help them by providing diapers, food, formula and clothes and help the mother AFTER the baby is born … those are non profit organizations so there not getting paid either, they clearly want to help women and especially there child. PP and Pregnancy Crisis Centers both help, both do good and bad. PCC aren’t all of a sudden bad because they don’t support abortions. And, there not forcing you to not have an abortion.
TL;DR I don’t support pregnancy crisis centers that fake what they are and give out misinformation, we should be vocal about the fact that we’re anti-abortion. I do support them helping the mother and giving good sex-ed so that she won’t get pregnant and providing medical accuracy as well as having actual medical professionals there. I don’t support Planned Parenthood or any other abortion place, there JUST as biased as pregnancy crisis centers and even claimed that pro-life people are:
”Generally, people who identify as pro-choice believe that everyone has the basic human right to decide when and whether to have children. When you say you’re pro-choice you’re telling people that you believe it’s OK for them to have the ability to choose abortion as an option for an unplanned pregnancy — even if you wouldn’t choose abortion for yourself.
People who oppose abortion often call themselves  pro-life. However, the only life many of them are concerned with is the life of the fertilized egg, embryo, or fetus. They are much less concerned about the life of women who have unintended pregnancies or the welfare of children after they’re born. In fact, many people who call themselves “pro-life” support capital punishment (AKA the death penalty) and oppose child welfare legislation.
The black-and-white labels of “pro-life” and “pro-choice” pit people against each other, as if they’re on two different teams. But we agree more than we disagree: A majority of Americans believe abortion should be legal, and they support the right to access abortion.
We Say “Pro-Reproductive Rights” and “Anti-Abortion”
To be more clear and inclusive with our word choices, we at Planned Parenthood say “pro-reproductive rights” and “anti-abortion” to describe people’s beliefs about abortion access. The pro-reproductive rights and anti-abortion labels leave room for a variety of beliefs, while focusing on access to abortion specifically. “Accessing” abortion means having the ability to afford it, physically get to an abortion provider, and other factors that allow you to exercise your right to abortion care.
Pro-Reproductive Rights
When you say that you support reproductive rights, that means you support laws that allow people to access the full range of reproductive health care — including safe, legal abortion.
If you identify as pro-reproductive rights, it means you want to keep abortion legal and you believe people have the right to be able to access abortion.
Pro-reproductive rights folks oppose laws that ban abortion, as well as laws that keep abortion out of reach — like laws that shut down health centers or that force patients to jump through hoops to get the care they need.
Many pro-reproductive rights people also support access to birth control, sex education, care at Planned Parenthood health centers, and other forms of sexual and reproductive health care.
Anti-Abortion
Using the term “anti-abortion” is a more accurate way to describe people who want abortion to be illegal. Many anti-abortion people don’t believe that pregnant people should be able to choose abortion under any circumstances, even if their pregnancyis a result of rape or if carrying the pregnancy to term puts their life in danger.
Anti-abortion people tend to:
Disagree with most medical authorities about the definition of pregnancy. They mistakenly believe that pregnancy begins with the fertilization of the egg. Most authorities believe that pregnancy begins when the implantation of the fertilized egg into the lining of the uterus is complete.
They believe that people should not be allowed to use birth control.
They want to overturn the 1973 U.S. Supreme Court decision in Roe v. Wade. In that decision, the court ruled that a woman’s right to choose abortion is protected by the Constitution and that abortion is legal throughout the United States.
The Bottom Line
“Pro-choice” and “pro-life” labels don’t reflect the complexity of how most people actually think and feel about abortion. Instead of putting people in one category or another, we should respect the real-life decisions people and their families face every day.
Decisions about whether to choose adoption, end a pregnancy, or continue a pregnancy should be made by a pregnant person with the counsel of their family, their faith, and their health care provider. Politicians should not be involved in anyone’s personal medical decisions about their reproductive health or pregnancy.”
Planned Parenthood is just as biased, but I do support the fact that they provide more then abortions, but abortion is definitely there main money maker.
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miaaartemis · 4 years
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What Would Celia Do?
We are living in a time of great social upheaval. Covid-19 has taken over our lives, and has made no promise as to when it shall release it’s suffocating grip. At some point, sooner or later, this virus will dissipate into nothing more than a curable ailment and take its rightful place in the history books as the first great pandemic of the new millennium. However, I feel as a nation and as a world, we now understand that this virus is just a taste of the havoc and pandemonium that shall be wreaked if we do not implement great social and political change.
Since the end of WW2, the Western World has been conditioned into thinking that capitalism is the only way. In order for society to flourish and it’s citizens to reach their full potential as humans and workers, the free-market must do its thing and minimal government intervention is required. The focus is on the individual, and the individual’s ability to survive is an indicator of their worth as a human being. Although we have seen multiple cracks in this flawed political system over the years (immense wealth inequality, shoddy health-care systems that leave citizens broke, and of course, climate change), it makes sense that it has taken a world-wide pandemic for us to realise that the only way for us to survive this crazy thing called life is by working together. The sick are being saved by the public health-care system, workers are able to survive by a government-implemented welfare plan, and our collective sanity is being kept intact only by the fact that we can can still connect with others virtually when we cannot see them in person. The only way for anyone of any race, gender, age, ability or social class to survive Covid-19 is by working as a collective, with full government suppport. This is a fact.
So how do we do this this? How do we inspire ourselves and others to incite change and keep in place the new policies (that are entirely affordable and will make life easier for everyone) that have been implemented by our notably conservative government? In times of great social upheaval such as this, we look to the past to understand and learn from the characters that have shaped history.
I started reading a book a couple of weeks ago called ‘One Day in December’. It is a book about a woman who set out to change the world. She strived for this change in an entirely different time to the one we are living in now. It was a world before the internet, it was a world during the Cold War, and it was a time when women were still expected to do no more than raise a family and do as they were told. She was strong, strategic and had a certain joie de vivre that made her the perfect revolutionary. She had an immense talent for cooking, and took comfort in the great pleasures of homemaking and gardening. Her femininity and activism went hand-in-hand, famously pairing stiletto heels with her military garb whenever she felt like it. The woman that author Nancy Stout writes so eloquently about, is Celia Sánchez.
Sánchez was a Cuban national heroine, revolutionary and Fidel Castro’s right-hand woman during the Cuban Revolution of 1953-1959. She came from a well-off family in the town of Pilón, Cuba, the middle child of eight children. Her father was a doctor, but he was a staunch leftist and no doubt inspired his daughter’s political leanings. In the early stages of the revolution, Sánchez was responsible for mapping out possible landing points along the coastline where Castro and his guerrilla fighters could station themselves. She later became an arms runner, and eventually a combatant, quoted by many to be “the first female guerrilla fighter” as she was widely considered to be the first woman to fire an arms weapon during the Cuban revolution. Post-revolution Sánchez served in the Department of Services of the Council of State, and remained one of Castro’s closest companions (even adopting multiple children together) up until her death from lung cancer in 1980.
There is so much more to be said about the powerhouse that was Celia Sánchez, and I encourage you all to read about and indulge in her incredible, history-shaping life. But for me, the takeaway from Sánchez (and all powerful women in history) is her immense strength. Sánchez had an innate need to change the world and make life better not only for herself but for others around her. She understood and deplored the inequality and hardship that had been thrust upon herself and her comrades, and refused to stop fighting until things changed.
Through this pandemic, as a world united, our eyes can see anew the stark inequality that exists amongst us. Nothing speaks of this inequality more than the appalling privilege of the world’s elite. Having secured obscene amounts of wealth for themselves, they have nestled themselves away safely during this time of struggle, and we find ourselves reliant on nurses, doctors, teachers, Uber drivers and retail workers to save us.
We are now at a cross-roads. We can either choose to sit in this hole, and hope that one day things will get better, clinging to the words of encouragement from our world leaders, reassuring us that it will all be okay. Or, we can aim to do better than we have in the past. Going back to the old “normal” is not a sustainable solution. As artists, this is a time for us to embrace the struggle that is unfolding, and tell the stories that need to be told. We should tell them with honesty, we should tell them with style, we should tell them with flair, and we should tell them with the courage, bravery and ferocity, of women like Celia Sánchez.
Mia Evans Rorris, 2020
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bluewatsons · 6 years
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Reuven Brandt, Sperm, Clinics, and Parenthood, Bioethics, 30 Bioethics 618 (2016)
Abstract
In this article I examine a recent approach to regulating assisted reproduction, whereby use of some kind of medical intervention ‘triggers’ laws governing legal parenthood that are more favourable to intending parents and sperm providers. I argue that although perhaps an improvement on the previous legal framework, these laws are problematic for three important reasons. First, they are prone to violating parental rights and unjustly imposing substantial burdens on individuals. Second, they are discriminatory. Third, even if we take a pragmatic approach to the question of parenthood in these cases, these laws fail to properly consider the welfare interests of children. Finally, I conclude by showing that my argument does not entail adopting a laissez-fair attitude to conception using third-party sperm.
1 Introduction
Many jurisdictions have enacted legislation specifically governing the ascription of legal parenthood in cases where pregnancies occur by use of third-party sperm.1 One legislative approach, the focus of this article, is to depart from the weight common law normally places on genetic ties by making intending parents who use third-party sperm a child's sole legal parents, but only when conception occurs through use of some specified type of medical intervention. I will call legislative approaches that have this effect ‘modified parenthood by medical intervention statutes’ (MPMIS). As a consequence of MPMIS, it is not only the consent and intentions of the sperm provider and intending parent(s) that the legislation takes into consideration when determining how to ascribe legal parenthood; whether conception occurs via the right kind of medical intervention plays a substantive role in determining which individual(s) the law recognizes as a child's legal parent(s). One example is the current regulatory framework in the United Kingdom, where the rules governing legal parenthood following use of third-party sperm are different for individuals who are not married or in a civil partnership if conception takes place under the auspices of a medical clinic licensed to provide fertility treatments.2
In what follows I will argue that MPMIS are morally problematic for three principal reasons. First, they are prone to both (a) ascribe legal parenthood in ways that violate moral parental rights, and (b) unjustly burden individuals with weighty financial obligations. Second, they discriminate against certain reproducers by requiring them to undergo medical scrutiny that is not required of other reproducers. Lastly, the status quo cannot be defended by arguing that the law must take a pragmatic stance to the question of legal parenthood because there is uncertainty about what moral facts ultimately determine parenthood.
I will begin by briefly describing two legal decisions where medical intervention was relevant for determining which adults were a child's legal parents, and offer these as initial motivation for thinking that the legislation that led to these decisions is problematic. In the second section I will explain why MPMIS came about, their potential benefits, and why they are ethically suspect. In the third section I will briefly explain why my view does not entail a laissez-faire approach to reproduction via third-party sperm.
Although one of the examples I present is a case from the US, my discussion will focus on the law in the UK, and the Human Fertilization and Embryology Act (HFE Act) 1990 & 2008 in particular. This is because the development of the law in the UK was done in a relatively transparent fashion that provides some degree of access to the motivations behind the legislation. Despite my focus on UK law, I take the ethical analysis to apply to similar legislation elsewhere.
Throughout the text I will use the subscript m to distinguish moral conceptions of parenthood, parental rights and parental responsibilities from their legal analogues.
2 Cases
Bruce v Boardwine
The Court of Appeals of Virginia awarded Robert Boardwine custody and visitation rights for his genetic child following a private sperm donation arrangement that broke down.3 Boardwine had provided sperm to his friend, Joyce Bruce, with the understanding that Bruce would be the sole parent of the child. Bruce then inseminated herself with Boardwine's sperm using a turkey baster. However, following a dispute with Bruce, Boardwine changed his mind about the relationship he wanted with his genetic child and petitioned the court to recognize his parental rights. In its decision, the court found that a Virginia statute4 excludes sperm donors from legal parenthood only when insemination occurs with the aid of medical technology. Since Bruce used a turkey baster, which the court found does not satisfy the definition of ‘medical technology', Boardwine could not be legally treated as a sperm donor. Reaffirming the decision of the lower court, the judge therefore granted Boardwine access to his genetic child. Importantly, had conception taken place using medical technology rather than a turkey baster, the original agreement (which was not disputed by either party) could have been upheld by the court.
Langridge
In the UK, Mark Langridge reported that he was ordered to pay child maintenance by the Child Support Agency over a decade after privately providing sperm to a lesbian couple.5 Though the children's birth mother disputed that she and Langridge had agreed that Langridge would be a mere sperm provider, this factual question was rendered immaterial by the legislative framework governing legal parenthood at the time. The HFE Act 1990 (which will be discussed in greater detail below) excluded sperm providers from legal responsibility for their genetic offspring only when sperm is transferred through a licensed medical clinic.6 Consequently, Langridge was the legal father of the children created using his gametes, despite any prior agreement between himself and the children's mother. However, had Langridge donated sperm through a licensed medical clinic, he would not be a legal parent of the resulting children (unless he had explicitly entered into a parenthood agreement with the intending mother), and thus would not have child maintenance obligations.
Discussion
Even at first blush the importance placed on the use of medical intervention in these cases seems strange, since it is not immediately clear why technical details regarding the method of conception ought to be relevant for determining which individuals have parental rights and obligations for particular children. This is most acute in the Boardwine case, where the type of device (a turkey baster) used to deliver sperm was central to the court's finding that Boardwine was a legal parent. However, even in the Langridge case, it might seem odd that legal parenthood depends, in part, on whether a type of medical intervention (use of licensed healthcare provider) is involved in the fertilization process. As these cases demonstrate however, MPMIS make these factors relevant to legal parenthood. In what follows I will explain what brought about MPMIS, and why they are indeed morally problematic.
Examination of MPMIS
Parenthood Under Common Law
MPMIS arose, in part, out of the realization that parenthood under common law poorly accommodates reproduction via third-party sperm because of the importance traditionally placed on biological ties when determining legal fatherhood. Though the relationship between genetic kinship and legal fatherhood is not strict, it is a factor that is given considerable weight, and in many cases is sufficient for legal parenthood.7 Perhaps the clearest example is unintended pregnancy. Consider a single woman who gives birth to a child conceived during a one-time tryst. Despite the absence of any ongoing relationship with the child's mother, or any intention to parent a child, the genetic father is generally deemed the child's legal parent. In fact, in a case where a clinic accidentally used the sperm from the wrong man when treating a couple who were seeking to reproduce using their own gametes, the High Court ruled that the man whose sperm was accidentally used (and not the intending father) was the resulting children's legal father.8 In the case of sperm the law places such enormous weight on genetic ties that courts have even found men to be legal parents in circumstance where their sperm was purloined via fraud, and even when they were the victim sexual assault.9
When applied to assisted reproduction, this importance placed on genetic ties gives rise to worries for both sperm providers and individuals who wish to create families using third-party sperm. For sperm providers, the worry is being deemed a legal parent of the child created using the provided gametes, as exemplified in the Langridge case described above. For individuals making use of third-party sperm, the worry is that they risk having their family life disrupted by the parental claims of a sperm provider, as exemplified in the Boardwine case. Though in cases where a woman is married there is a common law presumption that her spouse is the child's legal parent, this presumption can be rebutted by genetic tests requested by either the presumed father, or another man who asserts a claim to paternity.10 In earlier decisions, courts were hesitant to permit contestations of paternity when they risked disrupting a functioning family unit.11 However, at least in the UK, there has been a shift towards determining a child's legal paternity on the basis of genetics once a challenge is made,12 despite potential disruptions to the existing family structure that might arise as a consequence.13
The traditional legal approach to parenthood thus raises several problems for individuals wishing to reproduce using third-party sperm. As in the Langridge case, it puts sperm providers at risk of being deemed the legal parents of their genetic children, which brings with it significant obligations, despite their intentions when providing sperm. As in the Boardwine case, it puts intending parents at risk of having sperm providers granted the legal authority to interfere with their private family life.
Purpose of MPMIS
MPMIS arose to create a framework specifically governing reproduction via third-party sperm that is more favorable to the interests of intending parents, gamete providers, and arguably their offspring,14 than legal parenthood under common law.15 For instance, in The Report of the Committee of Inquiry into Human Fertilization and Embryology (hereafter referred to as ‘The Warnock Report’) which laid much of the conceptual groundwork for the HFE Act 1990, the committee recommended that reproduction via third-party gametes be accepted as legitimate treatment for infertility, and that third-party sperm providers not have any legal rights or responsibilities in respect of the children that result from their gametes.16 The committee's recommendation was an explicit call to depart from the consequences of reproduction via third-party sperm under common law, in favour of legislation that treated such procedures as assisted reproduction for intending parents. To this effect the committee stated:
Clearly in view of our recommendation (4.17) that the AID child should for all purposes be treated as the legitimate child of the couple who have benefitted from successful treatment, the donor should have no responsibilities towards the child. We therefore recommend a change in the law so that the semen donor will hnave no parental rights or duties in relation to the child.17
A similar recommendation was made in respect of ova donors, though in this case it affirmed the common law approach that gestation and not genetics should determine motherhood.18
That the Warnock Report recommended altering the conditions that give rise to legal parenthood does not fully explain MPMIS because this suggestion alone in no way implies that use of specially licensed clinics ought to have any bearing on how courts determine legal parenthood. At least in the UK, the key motivation for including licensed clinics as part of the framework governing parenthood, which in turn motivates MPMIS, was to ensure the health and safety of the individuals involved, including the children who would eventually result from third-party gametes. For example, later in The Warnock Report the committee states that they see ‘the protection of the public…as the primary objective of regulation’ and that they ‘believe that all the techniques require active regulation and monitoring, even though, as we realise, such restrictions may be regarded by some as infringing clinical or academic freedom’.19 Under the HFE Act 1990, such measures include limiting the number of donor offspring in order to prevent accidental consanguineous relationship, screening donors and their gametes in order to prevent the transmission of diseases, and screening both donors and recipients in order to ensure that they are medically fit to undergo their respective procedures.20 MPMIS thus rest on the dual concerns that the common law does not adequately accommodate reproduction via third-party sperm and that the state has an interest in ensuring that any such reproduction is done in a safe manner.
We might reasonably think that The Warnock Report's proposal is a welcome one. First, it creates a mechanism for individuals reproducing by means of third-party sperm to become legal parents from the moment of birth, while also excluding third-party sperm providers from later gaining parental status. That third-party sperm providers are excluded from being legal parents also means that they do not face the possibility of being burdened with child maintenance obligations. Second, the medical requirements that clinics are obligated to fulfill protect the health interests of the individuals seeking treatment and any children that may result. However, in the following section I will argue that coupling the modified criteria for legal parenthood to the clinical requirements is in fact morally problematic. I will argue that, at best, MPMIS discriminate against individuals reproducing via third party sperm by unjustly requiring them to undergo clinical procedures and screening that are not required of other reproducers if they want to ensure legal recognition as the child's parents to the exclusion of sperm providers.21 At worst, MPMIS are prone to violating moral parental rights, and imposing unjust financial burdens on those proving their sperm for the reproductive use of others.
MPMIS and Harm
Moral Rights and MPMIS
The purpose of MPMIS is to codify the ascription of legal parenthood, and presumably we want this ascription to track the facts that are relevant to moral parenthood in so far as this is possible. Ideally, legal parents would be moral parents (parentsm), and vice-versa. When we consider the normative features of parentalm rights, two important questions to be addressed are, (1) what is the content of parentalm rights? and (2) who are the holders of these rights? A particular theory regarding what ultimately grounds parentalm rights might have consequences for each of these questions.22 For instance, individuals who take a strong child-centric approach to parentalm rights might think that it is the individual(s) best suited to promote the interests of the child that have parentalm rights, and that these rights are constrained by the obligation to always act in the child's best interest. Alternatively, individuals who take a more parent-centric approach might think that the interests of a person or people reproducing with the aim of parenting play a significant role in determining who has parentalm rights, but that these rights are limited to a certain extent by the interests of the children they parent.23 Turning to the first question, though the philosophical literature is very much divided on the precise content of parental rights, authors from both parent-centric and child-centric approaches broadly agree that parents ought to have a certain degree of privacy and autonomy when raising their children.24 Outside philosophical debates about parenthood, the right to private family life is also considered important, as evidenced by its inclusion in the European Convention on Human Rights,25 The Human Rights Act26 and the UN's Universal Declaration of Human Rights.27 Although defending a particular view about the normative extension of the right to private and autonomous family life is beyond the scope of this paper, there are examples that I take to be relatively uncontroversial. Consider, for instance, a family that plans to take their young child on a road trip to celebrate a cultural festival with their extended family. Although a neighbouring family might like to include the infant in their family event, and might even make the case that the event they propose will be more beneficial to the young child, we still think that the child's parents have the right to take their child to their family's celebration.
The second question, identifying who is the holder of parentalm rights, is equally controversial. In the philosophical literature, four kinds of theories dominate the debate: genetic accounts,28 gestational accounts,29 intentional accounts,30 and causal accounts.31 According to the genetic account of parenthood, individuals acquire parentalm rights because their progeny's genetic material is derived from their own. According to intentionalists, parentalm rights arise from the intention to parent a child. On the gestationalist account, parentalm rights arise primarily from the act of gestation, and others’ parental claims or status as a moral parent arises from their social relationship with the gestating woman. Lastly, causal accounts of parenthood determine parentalm rights on the basis of the kind of causal role individuals have in bringing a child into existence. What is important for the purposes of this discussion is that the involvement of a licensed clinic plays no role in determining parentalm rights in any of the major accounts. Use of licensed clinic does not alter: the genetic link between reproducers and their offspring, the intensions of the involved parties, or the identity of the person who gestates a child. And although some causal theorists might include clinic employees as individuals who have some responsibility towards the children they help create,32 that the clinic is licensed is irrelevant to the nature of the causal role they play in bringing a child into existence. So while causal theorists might conclude that the involvement of additional parties in the creation of a child, such as medical professionals, affects the structure of the responsibilities various adults have towards a child, it seems unlikely that being a licensed professional is of any importance to the causal relationships from which responsibility is ultimately derived.
It is therefore reasonable to conclude that the presence or absence of licensed medical treatment is unlikely to determine which individuals have parentalmrights and responsibilities for particular children. Individuals who have an intentional or gestational view of parenthoodm will think that granting legally protected contact to a sperm provider who changes his mind about the kind of relationship he wishes to have with the child he helped to create, merely because conception occurred outside the auspices of a licensed clinic, violates the parentalm rights of the commissioning parent(s) and/or gestating parent. Similarly, individuals who have a genetic or causal view of parenthood will think that refusing to recognize a sperm donor as a legal parent merely because a licensed clinic was used violates the sperm provider's parentalm rights.33Consequently, MPMIS will assign legal parental rights and responsibilities in ways that diverge from their moral analogues, at least in some cases. This in turn will result in some individuals being denied their parentalm right to privacy and autonomy in raising their children, regardless of which theory of parenthoodm is adopted.
A similar argument also arises concerning the legal obligations that follow from legal parenthood. In a recent case in the UK, a private sperm donor who was found to be a legal parent claimed that his financial obligations to his genetic offspring were preventing him from starting a family of his own.34 And as noted by Elizabeth Brake, child maintenance obligations can result in substantial burdens, so imposing them ought to done in an ethically acceptable fashion that considers the rights and interests of all parties.35 Determining exactly what kind of involvement in procreation brings about a moral obligation to provide child maintenance is as contentious as determining what kind of procreative involvement results in parental rights. However, as in the case of parental rights, it is unlikely that the use of a licensed clinic will play any role in determining which individuals have a moral obligation to support the children they have helped to create. Thus, just as MPMIS risk violating parental rights, they also risk either burdening individuals with child maintenance obligations in a morally problematic way, or legally ‘letting off the hook’ individuals who have the moral obligation to support certain children.
One defence of cleaving legal parenthood from moral parenthood in these sorts of cases, as I have argued, occurs as a result of MPMIS, might be that we are justified in departing from the moral facts governing parenthood if it is to encourage other important moral ends, like the health of the involved parties and of future generations. As was noted previously, the justification offered in the Warnock Report for regulating assisted reproduction was the health and safety of the involved parties. Although sperm provision is not a procedure with many inherent risks, we might think that MPMIS are an important tool for ensuring that IVF and other similar procedures are done safely, given the significant health complications that are possible. We might also think that MPMIS are important for ensuring that: (a) women undergoing treatment are sufficiently healthy to undergo pregnancy, (b) the gametes do not pose a risk of infectious disease to the woman gestating or the resulting child, and (c) the risk of passing congenital diseases to the resulting children and future generations (including through accidental consanguineous relationships) is minimized.
However, similar potential health risks arise from sperm in traditional sexual reproduction, and yet there is no similar regulatory framework in place that encourages reproducers to minimize those risks.36 Individuals reproducing sexually risk acquiring infectious diseases, passing infectious diseases to their offspring, and passing congenital diseases to their offspring. Crucially, there is no need for individuals wishing to become parents through sexual intercourse to proceed in a manner that meets some health and safety standard in order for the law to grant them legal parental rights and responsibilities. This is the case even when individuals wilfully engage in high-risk activities, like reproducing with a known carrier of an autosomally dominant genetic disease, or sexually transmitted infection. Thus, even if we think that encouraging responsible reproductive practices justifies assigning legal parenthood in a manner that departs from parenthoodm we have a problem of parity: the law only takes these welfare factors into consideration when individuals reproduce using third-party sperm. As will be discussed in more detail in the following section, this raises a problem of discrimination against individuals reproducing in this way.37
One possible explanation for this asymmetry might be that assisted reproduction necessitates medical intervention in a way that sexual reproduction does not, and so we might think that MPMIS are primarily about setting standards for medical procedures and thus are not that unusual. However, there are several reasons to reject this explanation. First, as the case Bruce v Boardwine discussed above exemplifies, artificial insemination by donor (AID) is not a particularly technical procedure that necessitates medical intervention. Though we might think that this is an unforeseen exception to the general framework of the HFE Act 1990, the Warnock report does explicitly note that ova donation is importantly different from AID in that ova donation necessitates medical intervention in a way that AID does not, yet still concludes that all procedures ought to be regulated.38 Second, it is unclear why failure to respect medical guidelines ought to have any bearing on how legal parenthood is determined. Presumably medical guidelines are in place largely for welfare reasons, and so if we think that an individual risking her own or her future child's welfare has no bearing on legal parenthood in the case of sexual reproduction, it is unclear why similar risk-taking ought to play a role in legal parenthood when individuals reproduce via third-party sperm.
I would like to emphasize that my argument up to this point is not merely that MPMIS rely on an ethically contentious theory of parenthoodm as a basis for assigning legal parental rights and obligations. Rather, my argument is that MPMIS take no morally principled stand whatsoever on the features that give rise to parentalm rights and responsibilities. Consequently, MPMIS will result in violations of parentalm rights and unjust impositions of weighty burdensregardless of the account of parenthoodm that is adopted. Furthermore MPMIS cannot be defended on the grounds that they promote the heath interests of reproducers, their children, and society at large, because these concerns are not considered in other instances of reproduction, despite similar risks.
Discrimination
Despite the theoretical problems discussed above, individuals who endorse an intentionalist account of parenthood, at least in gamete provision cases,39 might somewhat approve of MPMIS. Although MPMIS require reproducers wishing to become legal parents using third-party sperm to undergo greater medical scrutiny, they at least provide a route to guaranteed legal parenthood for certain parentsm where none was available before. While this might make MPMIS an improvement to the previous legal framework (depending on one's view of moral parenthood), it does not mean that they are free of serious moral problems. Consider the following analogy.
We could imagine a state in which a body of law developed such that inter-racial couples were incapable of being recognized as a child's legal parents, regardless of whether a child was a product of their gametes. We could further imagine that, after much public consultation and debate, the state decided it was time to amend the law to include inter-racial couples as legal parents of the children they create through sexual reproduction, despite looming questions about the ethics of inter-racial parenthood. However, under the new law, inter-racial couples would be required to first undergo medical screening and be certified ‘safe’ or the previous law denying them legal parenthood would apply. For the same-race couple, no screening would be required. Although we might think that this law is an improvement to the preceding legal framework, we would still think it was problematically discriminatory. So if we think that individuals who use third-party gametes to reproduce, such as same-sex couples, infertile individuals, and infertile heterosexual couples, should be just as much parents from the moment of birth as intending parents who reproduce using their own gametes, then we have reason to find MPMIS problematic.40
There is however a difference between assisted reproduction and the inter-racial case that might make MPMIs seem more palatable. In the case of the inter-racial couple, part of what makes the modified legal framework seem so unacceptable is that the identity of the parentsm is clear, and so including them as legal parents could be easily accomplished with a legislative change. In the case of reproduction by third-party gametes, circumstances might arise where it becomes difficult to determine which individuals the law should recognize as a child's parents, even if there is agreement about what approach the law should take when determining parenthood. Disputes might arise about the nature of the sperm-provision arrangement. For instance, a man who has intercourse with a woman with the understanding that they would co-parent any resulting children might, during the course of the pregnancy, change his mind about wanting to parent. As a means of escaping child maintenance obligations, he might later claim that his genetic child was actually the product of a third-party sperm provision agreement.41 Alternatively, a sperm donor might change his mind might about the relationship he wants to have with his genetic child, and later deny that he provided sperm with the understanding that he was not to be a parent. Unlike in the inter-racial example, we are therefore left with a pragmatic problem: we require a method for distinguishing private third-party sperm provision agreements from reproduction where the genetic parents are also the legal parents. Someone might think that MPMIS are acceptable because they resolve this problem by creating clear guidelines for establishing that a third-party sperm provision agreement was in force.
The question that looms large in these cases is where to place the burden of proof, since at some point the state must determine which individual(s) have legal rights and responsibilities for a child. For reasons that I will not fully articulate here,42 it might makes sense to presume that legal parental standing should follow the common law approach, barring conclusive evidence that there was an agreement to depart from this norm. In this vein, use of a licensed clinic ought to be strong evidence, if not definitive proof, that such an agreement was in fact in place. But the need to resolve these kinds of disputes cannot justify MPMIS, because although use of a clinic is probably sufficient for refuting a presumption in favour of genetically determined parenthood, it should not be necessary. For instance, I see no reason why the law could not be amended so that a signed and notarised document outlining the intentions of the involved parties would suffice to outweigh any presumption in favour of biological parenthood. Given the lifelong and serious implications for intending parents, children, and individuals who intended to be mere sperm providers, determining legal parenthood ought not to rest entirely on a single point of procedure that imposes more burdens on some reproducers than others. This is especially the case when the individuals most likely to be affected, like same-sex couples and intending single parents, have historically been discriminated against when seeking to become parents.
Permitting individuals to demonstrate that they have entered into a sperm provision arrangement without requiring them to seek the services of medical professionals is not unprecedented. Under current UK law this is in fact possible in certain circumstances. Individuals who are in a civil partnership or are married and who reproduce using third party gametes become the legal parents of any resulting children to the exclusion of the gamete provider, so long as they can establish (a) that a gamete provision agreement was made prior to conception and (b) the civil partner/spouse of the woman receiving treatment consented to the use of third party gametes.43 Other jurisdictions apply this approach more generally. For example, the Family Law Act in British Columbia requires only that some agreement making clear the intentions of the involved parties be made prior to conception in order that a pregnancy to be legally considered the result of assisted reproduction.44 In such cases, legal parenthood goes to the intending parent(s), regardless of genetic relatedness and regardless of whether conception occurs under the auspices of a medical clinic.45 Under this model, cases like Boardwine's would not arise because the agreement would be enforceable even if insemination took place using a turkey baster.
MPMIS on pragmatic grounds
If we take moral uncertainty about parenthoodm as a background condition, we might think that the best any legislation could do is offer a pragmatic solution in the face of competing views about parental rights and responsibilities. This is because although there is philosophical disagreement about what makes an individual a parentm, the law does not have the luxury of waiting for the dust to settle, and must adjudicate disputes about parenthood in a timely fashion. This possible defence of MPMIS on pragmatic grounds might proceed as follows. In cases where we are relatively certain about determinations of parenthoodm, keeping legal parenthood consistent with the moral facts ought to be prioritized.46 In cases where determining parenthoodm is less clear, we are justified in crafting laws that assign legal parenthood in ways that promote other important ends, such as the health of reproducers, their children, and future generations. We might think that focussing on promoting these other goods is an acceptable aim of policy because, due to uncertainty about parenthoodm, ensuring that parentalm rights are protected is not possible. On this view, then, MPMIS are justified because they discourage individuals from reproducing in risky ways; the consequence of not following the proper medical route that minimizes negative health consequences is having legal parenthood assigned in a manner that is not in keeping with the stated intentions of the involved parties.
A major problem with this defence of MPMIS, however, is that it considers only the benefits of discouraging risky reproductive behaviour, and fails to adequately take into consideration the future welfare interests of the children to be parented. Although it may be true that the state should take measures to encourage individuals to reproduce in a responsible manner, it is far from clear that this aim ought to determine who has rights and obligations towards a child. Consider the following hypothetical case. A woman decides to reproduce using third-party sperm, but does not want to go through the hassle of using a licensed clinic. Instead, she illegally purchases sperm from a self-described ‘party animal’ who has neither the financial means nor the disposition to adequately parent a child. Because she does not use a licensed clinic, the state later determines that the sperm provider is one of the child's legal parents.
Even if we presume uncertainty about parenthoodm, it is still intuitively inappropriate for the state to discourage this kind of ‘black market’ sperm provision by making the sperm provider one of the child's legal parents, rather than mother's partner/spouse. This is because doing so worsens the resulting child's predicament, which seems wrong because the child is an unconsenting innocent party to the arrangement made between the couple and the sperm provider. Not only are the child's health interests put at risk because unscreened sperm is used, but her family life is rendered prone to interjection47 from an individual far less suitable to parent. A more reasonable approach in circumstances in which (a) there is uncertainty about parenthoodm and (b) procedures put in place to regulate assisted reproduction were not followed, is to decide parenthood on the basis of the best interests of the child.48 This approach would discourage ‘black market’ transactions by discounting the interests of reproducers in favour of those of the children they create, while also ensuring that children are not further harmed by the state's attempt to promote more careful reproductive practices.
Discussion
I have argued that MPMIS are morally problematic for three major reasons. First, they risk assigning weighty legal rights and obligations in ways that depart from the underlying moral facts. Importantly, this argument does not rest on taking a position on which parties in a third-party sperm provision case ought to be the child's legal parents. Second, even if we think the state should provide some mechanism for accommodating intentional parenthood when individuals reproduce using third-party sperm, MPMIS are not justified. This is because MPMIS impose medical scrutiny as a condition of legal parenthood, which is a burden not imposed on other reproducers, and one that is not needed for determining whether a third-party sperm provision agreement was in place. Finally, MPMIS cannot be defended on the grounds that in the absence of relative certainty about parenthoodm, crafting laws about parenthood that promote goods other than protecting parenthoodm, like promoting more health-conscious reproductive practices, is justified. This is because MPMIS fail to adequately take into consideration the welfare interests of the existing child and instead focus on ‘punishing’ the adults who violate regulations governing reproduction. In closing I will briefly discuss what implications this argument has for the regulation of third-party sperm provision more generally.
3 Should Regulation be Abandoned Completely?
The preceding argument might be interpreted as advocating for a relatively laissez-faire attitude towards reproduction via third-party sperm, if it is to be permitted at all. Since I argue that there is no good justification for requiring individuals reproducing using third-party sperm to use a licensed clinic in order to be recognized as legal parents, someone might think that my view entails opening the floodgates to all kinds of unscrupulous practices. We might envision unregulated IVF practitioners that place little weight on the safety of their patients, and instead focus on providing low-cost and high-profit services. However, my argument is much narrower.
First, I argue that there are no good justifications for making the promotion of health-conscious reproductive practices relevant to legal parenthood when reproduction occurs via third-party gamete provision, but not in traditional reproduction. If a strong argument could be made that promoting heath was more important than having legal parenthood track parenthoodm, and society adopted heath-screening requirements for all reproducers, then having legal parenthood in third-party gamete cases depend on health screening would not be problematic. Second, if we do not think that promoting health-conscious reproductive practices ought to be relevant to determinations of legal parenthood in traditional reproduction, which is the stance currently reflected in law, my argument merely implies that the same should be true in third-party gamete cases. This implies nothing about consequences for violating regulations governing assisted reproduction that do not impinge on legal parenthood. For instance, we might still think that providing IVF services without a licence constitutes practising medicine without a licence and ought to be criminal. We could similarly think that storage and distribution of sperm ought be done in accordance with strict safety guidelines, and fine or imprison individuals who violate these regulations. This approach would be consistent with how we currently treat intending parents who use their own sperm when reproducing, but might otherwise violate medical regulations. For instance, acquiring and using restricted fertility drugs without a prescription violates health regulations, even if the individuals making use of the drugs reproduce using their own sperm. While we may punish individuals who violate health regulations in this way, the consequences they face do not include alterations to how legal parenthood is determined. My argument therefore leaves open room for regulating assisted reproduction, but shows that violations of these regulations should not rule out intending parents as legal parents or automatically include gamete providers as legal parents. So although someone might think that individuals using third-party gametes who reproduce with a turkey baster rather than following the mandated procedure should face some consequences (and I am not suggesting there should), my argument shows that legal parenthood should not necessarily lie in the balance.
Footnotes
By third-party sperm I mean sperm provided to intending parents with the understanding that the sperm provider will not be the parent of any resulting children. I find this terminology better than ‘donor sperm’ because the argument here applies equally to sperm that has been commercially acquired.
Human Fertilization and Embryology Act 2008; Human Fertilization and Embryology Act 1990.
Court of Appeals of Virginia, Record No. 1250–14-3 (Bruce v Boardwine).
Code of Virginia. Title 20, Chapter 9.
M Brignall. 2012. Gay sperm donor told to pay child maintenance for 'his' two children. The Guardian. 26 October.
Note that later amendments arising from the HFE Act 2008 allow for some exceptions to this rule. See the discussion at the bottom of page 18 and footnote 43.
For a good discussion on tensions that arise in legal approaches to fatherhood see: A. Bainham. 2004. Contact as a Right and Obligation. In Bainham, Lindley, Richards and Trinder, ed. Children and Their Families. Portland: Hart Publishing: 61–88.
Leeds Teaching Hospitals NHS Trust v A & Ors [2003] EWHC 259 (QB).
For examples and discussion see: S. Sheldon. ‘Sperm bandits’, Birth Control Fraud and the Battle of the Sexes. Legal Studies 2001; 21: 460–480; and D. Benatar. 2012 The Second Sexism: Discrimination Against Men and Boys. Chichester: John Wiley & Sons: Chapter 3.
Currently such a rebuttal is possible only if the civil partner/spouse of the woman seeking treatment did not consent to the treatment. HFE Act 2008. op. cit. note 2. Sec. 35 and 42;
L. Morgan. Child Support Fifty Years Later. Family Law Quarterly 2008; 42(3): 365–380. p. 373.
In Re H, (Blood Tests: Parental Rights) [1997] Fam 89. It is also worth noting that there has been some push in the other direction. See L v P (Paternity Test: Child's Objections) [2011] EWHC 3399.
It is worth mentioning that though the common law places great importance on genetic ties when determining legal fatherhood, this is not so in the case of motherhood. There is a common law presumption that the gestational mother is a child's legal mother, regardless of whether she was the source of ova. This presumption possibly arose due to the fact that until recently the woman gestating was also always the ova provider, and so there was no impetus for the law to distinguish between the two kinds of contribution when determining a child's legal mother. Many jurisdictions (including the UK) have codified this presumption (HFE Act 2008, sec. 33), though it is not without controversy. Some scholars have pointed out that if the contribution of gametes alone suffices for men to be a legal parents, then it is unclear why the same should not hold for women as well.[T. Bayne & A. Kolers Towards a Pluralistic Account of Parenthood. Bioethics 2003; 17(3): 221–242.] There is room for much ethical debate about the relative weight that should be afforded to different types of reproductive contributions when resolving conflicts over legal parenthood and about the structure of legal parenthood more generally, but as it stands it is gestation and not the provision of ova that determines motherhood in the UK.
The HFE Act 1990 requires that clinics consider the welfare interests of future and existing children when determining whether to provide fertility treatment to intending parents. See Human Fertilization and Embryology Act 1990 sec. 13 (5).
This move is not uncontroversial, and some legal scholars have argued that that legal parenthood should track biological ties as far is possible. For instance Andrew Bainham states that, ‘The concept of parentage should rather be confined, to reflect as far as possible the unique position of biological parents and, through the child's filiation with them, the wider kinship links to the extended maternal and paternal families’. A. Bainham. Arguments about Parentage. Camb Jaw J 2008; 67(2): 322–351. p. 349.
Committee of Inquiry Into Human Fertilisation and Embryology Report. Committee of Inquiry Into Human Fertilisation and Embryology Report Her Majesty's Stationary Office, London (1984) (July) Sec. 4.17; Sec. 4.22; Sec. 6.8.
Ibid: Sec. 4.22.
Ibid Sec. 6.8.
Ibid. Sec. 13.1; Sec. 13.3.
See Human Fertilization and Embryology Code of Practice, 8th Edition. 2015; Sec 11.; E. Jackson. 2015. The law and DIY assisted conception. In Revisiting the Regulation of Human Fertilization and Embryology. K. Horsey, ed. New York: Routledge: 31–49.
For women using donated gametes, being a legal parent is not the problem but, as in the Boardwine case, they risk having the sperm provider gain status as the child's legal parent. This might cause serious disruptions to the woman's private family life.
H. Brighouse & A .Swift. Parents’ Rights and the Value of the Family. Ethics 2007; 117(1): 80–108.
Ibid.
For a child-centric approach see S. Hannan & R. Vernon. Parental Rights: A Role-Based Approach. Theory and Research in Education 2008; 6(2): 173–189. For parent-centric approaches see: F. Shoeman. Rights of Children, Rights of Parents and the Moral Basis of the Family. Ethics. 1980; 91(1): 6–19; Brighouse and Swift, Ibid.
Council of Europe. European Convention on Human Rights. Article 8.
The Human Rights Act, 1998.
United Nations General Assembly. Universal Declaration of Human Rights. Article 16.
For examples see JD. Velleman. Persons in Prospect. Philos Public Aff 2008; 36(3): 221–288.; JD. Velleman. Family History. Philosophical Papers 2005; 34(3):357–78.
For an example, see S. Feldman. Multiple Biological Mothers: The Case For Gestation.J Soc Philos 1992; 23(1): 98–104.
E. Brake. Fatherhood and Child Support: Do Men Have a Right to Choose? J Appl Philos 2005; 22(1): 55–73.; E. Brake. 2010. Willing Parents: A Volunturist Account of Parental Role Obligations. In. Procreation and Parenthood. D. Archard & D. Benatar, eds. Oxford: Oxford University Press: 151–177.
For examples see, J. Nelson. Parental Obligations and the Ethics of Surrogacy: A Causal Perspective. Public Aff Q 1991; 5(1): 49–61; G. Fuscaldo. Genetic Ties: Are They Morally Binding? Bioethics 2006; 20(2): 64–76.
L. Porter. How and Why to Prefer a Causal Account of Parenthood. J Soc Philos 2014; 45(2): 82–102.
A similar argument also holds true for child-centric defences of genetic parenthood. If, for example, we thought that genetic parenthood was defensible on the grounds that it is in the best interest of the child, then the status quo would still be problematic because it is unclear why this would cease to be the case when a licensed clinic is involved.
R. Williams. Sperm Donor to Lesbian Couple Forced to Pay Child Support. The Guardian 2007 4 December 2007.
Brake (2005) op. cit. note 30.
McLeod and Botterell raise similar concerns about regulations in adoption. See C. McLeod & A. Botterell. 2014. ‘Not For the Faint of Heart’: Assessing the Status Quo on Adoption and Parental Licensing. In Family Making. F. Baylis and C. McLeod, eds. Oxford: Oxford University Press: 151–167.
For a discussion of injustices caused by the invocation of welfare concerns in the regulation of assisted reproduction see: E. Jackson. Conception and the Irrelevance of the Welfare Principle. Mod Law Rev 2002; 65:176–203; E. Jackson. 2007. Rethinking the Pre-Conception Welfare Principle. In Human Fertilisation and Ebryology: Reproducing Regulation. K. Horsey and H. Biggs, eds. Abingdon, Oxon: Routledge-Cavendish: 47–68.
Warnock Report. op. cit. note 16. Sec. 6.6.
T. Bayne & A. Kolers. Towards a Pluralistic Account of Parenthood. Bioethics 2003; 17(3):221–42.
See discussion about injustice in Jackson op. cit. note 37.
One solution is to take a strong intentionalist approach to parental responsibilities along the lines of Elizabeth Brake, and deny that the legal parenthood ought to necessarily arise in one-night-stand cases. See Brake (2005). op. cit. note 30. and Brake (2010) op.cit. note 30.
For instance, given the historical importance placed on genetic ties, most people engaging in sexual reproduction do so with the understanding that responsibility for ensuing children will be shared between procreators. Given that this is already the default position, it makes sense that the burden of proof should be on demonstrating that the involved parties consented to depart from this norm.
That this option is not available to single people is problematic, especially given that single women are able to become the sole legal parents of a child if they use donor gametes through a licensed clinic. It is unclear why having a civil partner or spouse should replace any legitimate role that clinics play in the determination of legal parenthood, or why the consent of an individual not receiving treatment (the civil partner/spouse) is relevant to how the law determines legal parenthood; HFE Act 2008, sections 35 and 42.
British Columbia. Family Law Act. SBC 2011; Part 3.
Ibid.
We tend to think that moral parents ought to be given the opportunity to parent their children, unless there is strong evidence that they pose a serious threat to the future welfare of their children. For a discussion see, D. Archard. Child Abuse: Parental Rights and the Interests of the Child. J Appl Philos 1980; 7(2): 183–194.
For instance, the legal parent could petition for contact rights, or even shared residency. At a minimum, this would put the child through the ordeal of a series of legal proceedings, and if the petition is successful could result in the child having to spend significant amounts of time away from the more suitable parent, with someone whose influence may not be in the child's best interest.
This proposal raises two important questions which I cannot fully address in this article. One is determining the group of individuals that are appropriate candidates for being a particular child's parent(s). On this question, Bayne and Kolers’ paper on parental pluralism (op. cit. note 13) might serve as good starting point. The second is how to determine what is in the best interest of a child. Here I suggest, as a good analysis, J. Herring. Farewell Welfare? J Soc Welf Fam Law 2005; 27(2): 159–171.
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your-dietician · 3 years
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She Went on a PR Tour for Her Sick, Adopted African Child. Was It All a Lie?
New Post has been published on https://tattlepress.com/latest/she-went-on-a-pr-tour-for-her-sick-adopted-african-child-was-it-all-a-lie/
She Went on a PR Tour for Her Sick, Adopted African Child. Was It All a Lie?
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Photo Illustration by Elizabeth Brockway/The Daily Beast/Screenshot/Youtube
Last summer, Sophie Hartman was fixated on her 6-year-old adopted daughter Carmel possibly showing signs of early puberty.
The 31-year-old single mom from Renton, Washington, scheduled an appointment at Seattle Children’s Hospital with a pediatric endocrinologist, a doctor specializing in glands and the hormones they produce, according to a Renton Police probable-cause affidavit.
Hartman, a white, Jesus-loving former missionary, strapped Carmel—a little Black girl born in Zambia—into a wheelchair and rolled her into a medical room, where they met with the endocrinologist. Carmel was “a very handicapped child” who was showing “cyclical symptoms” such as a “discharge” in her underwear, Hartman told the doctor. The symptoms were occurring for four straight days around the same time every month, she added.
Carmel went through a battery of medical exams, including blood work and X-ray imaging. The doctor found “modest clinical findings of early puberty,” but not enough to confirm Carmel was indeed accelerating into womanhood.
During a follow-up appointment at Seattle Children’s in October, another endocrinologist ran more tests on Carmel. The doctor found no signs of active puberty in the child, but informed Hartman about two treatments used to suppress pubescence. One involved giving Carmel injections; the other option was more drastic, requiring “surgically lacerating” Carmel’s skin with a scalpel to insert an implant used to suppress early puberty.
The doctor warned Hartman that the implant would be difficult to remove after it was inserted into the skin. Yet she was “emphatic” about getting the implant for Carmel even though it wasn’t medically necessary, the physician later told Renton Police Detective Adele O’Rourke.
On March 17, O’Rourke met with Hartman in her home. During a recorded interview, police say, Hartman admitted she wanted the surgery for Carmel. “Even though doing an implant is more invasive, it really isn’t that big of a deal,” Hartman told O’Rourke, according to the probable-cause affidavit. “I think that would be better.”
Story continues
After doctors ruled out ovarian cysts as the cause for her daughter’s alleged symptoms, Hartman said she wanted to proceed with the implant. “I was like great,” Hartman allegedly said to the detective, recalling her last conversation with the endocrinologist. “Let’s get this on the schedule.”
Authorities didn’t give Hartman the chance.
The same day, Washington’s Department of Child, Youth, and Families placed Carmel and her older sister, Miah, whom Hartman also adopted, into protective custody. Hartman’s quest to stifle Carmel’s alleged early puberty is just one of several bizarre episodes documented in a probable-cause affidavit that led King County prosecutors to charge Hartman last month with two second-degree felony counts: assault on a child and attempted assault on a child.
According to the charging documents, Hartman subjected Carmel to “unnecessary surgical interventions and restraints” and also attempted to “substantially escalate” her daughter’s medical treatment by requesting “increasingly invasive and unnecessary medical procedures.”
The charges, which Hartman denies and to which she has pleaded not guilty, landed with a thud in the sometimes tight-knit world of white, American Evangelicals who adopt children from abroad. But the case also brought attention to the obscure crime of medical child abuse, in which a primary caregiver forces a child to undergo unnecessary treatment.
“What I am reading in the arrest report doesn’t sound at all like my friend,” Shannon Dingle, a single mom from Raleigh, North Carolina, who also has adopted African children and met Hartman in 2016 at an adoption conference in Seattle, told The Daily Beast.
Dingle said she and Hartman became friends and have remained in constant contact via text messaging and online chatting the past five years, as well as meeting in person during Hartman’s trips to Raleigh.
She still believes in Hartman’s innocence.
“How we got to the point that Sophie is being blamed for being abusive by having medical procedures that medical teams had to approve is something I don’t understand,” Dingle said. “It feels like a lot of responsibility is being put on Sophie that were team decisions.”
In addition to Dingle, Hartman has at least one well-renowned medical child abuse expert in her corner. Dr. Eli Newberger, a former Harvard medical school pediatrics professor who founded the child protection program at Boston Children’s Hospital, wrote to prosecutors on May 17 in an attempt to discourage them from filing charges against Hartman. However, legal experts believe there’s a strong case against the Washington mother.
Lawrence Gostin, a Georgetown University national health-law professor, told The Daily Beast that he reviewed the allegations in Hartman’s case and found authorities acted appropriately in removing her daughters from her care and investigating her for medical child abuse.
“The first thing you have to do in a case like this is ensure the safety and the well-being of the child,” Gostin told The Daily Beast. “Putting children under medical procedures that are unnecessary is just as harmful, and maybe more so, than physically abusing a child.”
Efforts to reach Hartman for this story were unsuccessful. Her attorneys Robert Flennaugh II, Jessica Goldman, and Adam Shapiro did not respond to phone messages and emails containing detailed questions. But in a previous joint statement released when she was charged, Hartman’s lawyers insisted prosecutors did not have a case against their client.
“These charges are based on false statements and misrepresentations of the medical record by a doctor at Seattle Children’s Hospital who has never seen the child or spoken with Ms. Hartman,” the statement said. “Ms. Hartman is innocent of these charges.”
Dr. Rebecca Wiester, medical director of Seattle Children’s Protection Program, is the doctor Hartman’s lawyers referenced in their statement. She penned a Feb. 21 letter to Washington child protection services that was co-signed by Carmel’s primary physicians. The three-page memo outlined their concerns about the danger Hartman was putting her daughter in. “It is not necessary to know the motivation of the caregiver, only the outcome of the behavior,” Wiester wrote. “The risk to [Carmel] is profound in this situation.”
Wiester declined an interview through Seattle Children’s spokeswoman Kathryn Mueller, who noted Washington health-care providers are required by law to report suspected cases of child abuse. “The health and safety of our patients is Seattle Children’s highest priority,” Mueller said. “Out of respect for privacy, we will not comment about specific cases.”
Based on a referral from child-welfare investigators, Detective O’Rourke led a four-month criminal investigation into Hartman. That included poring over hundreds of pages of medical records and interviewing dozens of medical professionals, physical therapists, and teachers who interacted with Hartman and Carmel on a regular basis, according to the 21-page probable-cause affidavit.
Renton Police Department Investigations Commander David Leibman and King County Prosecuting Attorney’s Office spokesman Casey McNerthney declined comment for this story. “We’re going to let the court documents speak for themselves,” McNerthney said.
But their findings painted a disturbing picture of a woman who constantly sought medical treatment for her daughter even as she burnished her public profile.
Between 2017 and 2018, they concluded, Hartman convinced physicians at two hospitals, including Seattle Children’s, to surgically insert tubes into Carmel’s digestive organs to help nourish her and expel bowel movements. This, they say, was solely based on the mom’s account that her daughter had trouble swallowing, had chronic vomiting episodes, had excessive diarrhea, and had debilitating bouts of constipation.
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Since being removed from Hartman’s care, they added, Carmel—who is identified by her initials in the affidavit and charging document since she is a minor—was eating food like a normal person, and the tubes were set to be removed.
Hartman also forced Carmel to wear orthotics, gait trainers, and ankle and leg braces since she was 2 years old, police say, adding that the mother also regularly strapped the girl to a wheelchair for long periods. The mom ignored directives that Carmel needed normal activities to develop appropriate muscle strength and physical development, according to doctors who were interviewed by investigators.
Meanwhile, teachers told detectives that Carmel had no problem walking, running, and performing normal childhood activities at school when she wasn’t under Hartman’s supervision.
Finally, Hartman claimed Carmel was diagnosed with alternating hemiplegia of childhood, or AHC, a rare neurological disease that causes repeated, prolonged episodes of paralysis, by leading neurologists at the Duke University Institute for Brain Sciences. In a recorded statement, Dr. Mohamed Mikati, Duke’s chief of pediatric neurology, told O’Rourke that Carmel does not have the genetic mutation that causes AHC and that he relied on Hartman’s descriptions of Carmel’s symptoms to make his diagnosis. Spokespeople for Mikati and Duke Health did not respond to emails requesting comment.
If there were any doubt behind the scenes about the nature or extent of Carmel’s illnesses, her mother’s public posture suggested otherwise.
Throughout Carmel’s ordeal, Hartman invited donations and routinely garnered publicity, the probable-cause affidavit states. She wrote a book about her experience traveling to Zambia for missionary work and returning with her two girls, and was a featured author at a Barnes and Noble meet and greet in 2016. Local media outlets published and produced human interest stories about Carmel, as Hartman promoted a social media presence for her daughter by creating an Instagram account and a private Facebook group so people could follow the little girl’s daily activities, according to the probable-cause affidavit.
In 2018, the Make-A-Wish Foundation arranged for Carmel, her mom, and her sister to travel to a ranch in Oregon to ride horses, per the affidavit. Police allege the trip was paid from donations to the nonprofit. Hartman also gave a speech about Carmel at a Make-A-Wish fundraiser. A friend and Hartman’s congregation at Pursuit NW Church in Snohomish, Washington, raised $15,661 and $30,583, respectively, so that Carmel’s mom could purchase a handicapped accessible SUV.
Inside DJ Bassnectar’s Disturbing Sex Trafficking, Child Porn, and Sex Abuse Allegations
Press accounts burnished an image of Hartman as a single mom struggling to care for a severely sick kid. But police say her own words suggested she may be someone who is prone to making things up.
As a result of a search warrant for her house, Renton Police investigators took Hartman’s personal journals and found pages in which she described lying in the past about injuries and illnesses she sustained as a teen, the probable-cause affidavit states. In one passage about her freshman year of high school, Hartman wrote that she “used a pen to bruise my hand and faked a broken hand,” as well as not telling the truth that she had “mono and meningitis.” On another page, Hartman allegedly indicated that she was “angry” and “abusive” with her children.
“Oh Lord, what have I become,” she wrote in the journal, according to the affidavit. “Who is this bad soul? It’s me.” She also allegedly wrote on a loose piece of paper: “When it comes to suffering, I am a compulsive liar/exaggerator.”
As law-enforcement authorities built their case against Hartman between March and May, her lawyers brought in Newberger, the Boston-based child-abuse expert, to bolster her defense—and debunk the findings of Wiester and the other Seattle Children’s pediatricians.
Newberger claimed he reviewed the medical records and witness statements mentioned in the probable-cause affidavit, according to a May 17 letter he wrote to King County deputy prosecuting attorney Celia Lee.
“Duke medical staff, third party witnesses, and videos of Carmel corroborate significant symptoms that were documented with assiduous care and accuracy by Ms. Hartman,” Newberger wrote. “The medical records show that Ms. Hartman did not simply invent symptoms.”
In a brief phone call, Newberger told The Daily Beast he could not comment about his findings because he expected to be called as a defense witness. He said he was referred to Hartman’s lawyers by a prominent legal scholar who has written about medical child abuse. “I reviewed the information and made an informed decision within my ethical threshold,” Newberger said.
Legal experts, on the other hand, argue King County prosecutors have documented enough evidence of medical child abuse to present a strong case against Hartman.
“The criminal procedure against the mom is drastic,” Gostin, the Georgetown professor, said. “But if the facts are as alleged, it is a legitimate prosecution.” Taking Hartman’s daughters into protective custody was also justified, he added.
Despite having her kids taken away and being criminally charged for child abuse, Hartman hasn’t spent a day in jail. She participated in her June 3 arraignment hearing via Zoom from her home; King County Judge Tanya Thorp set her bail at $100,000.
On June 10, Hartman was administratively booked after posting her bond, a process that allows a person to show up to the King County jail to be fingerprinted and photographed and be immediately released upon payment of bail. In addition, she was allowed to have supervised visits with her daughters in April and May, and Thorp granted her continued visitations while her case is pending. According to the probable-cause affidavit, doctors kept Carmel under observation for 16 days after removing her from Hartman; during that time, the girl walked and ate food normally without any medical issues.
Meanwhile, fellow Evangelicals, neighbors, and friends are either distancing themselves from Hartman or else refusing to believe that she could be so cruel to her adopted daughter.
Russell Johnson, Pursuit NW Church’s head pastor, told The Daily Beast that he and other church leaders have not seen or heard from her in the last year. “As were so many others, the leadership of the Pursuit NW was horrified to read the charges against Sophie Hartman,” he said in an email statement. “The Pursuit NW has a zero-tolerance policy for child abuse. We pray for these precious children and that justice be done.”
Matt Dimeo, who lives in the house next-door to Hartman, was more equivocal. He described her as a “good gal” and a “very nice person,” ultimately declining to opine on the accusations against her.
“Whether I am surprised or not, it doesn’t make a difference,” Dimeo said. “We are going to trust the system, and hopefully it is a positive situation for the children.”
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ctrldchaos · 3 years
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Name: Austen Shae Wolfe Pronouns: she/her Birthday: April 27 Zodiac Sign: Taurus Age: Late 20s Sexuality: Queer Occupation: Data Analyst/Photographer Favorite Drink: Cold brew coffee (not much of a drinker) Favorite Musical Artist: Tie between Alanis Morissette and Lizzo (what a combo)
Mini Bio:
Austen Wolfe born Austen Anderson was the product of an unwanted pregnancy between her alcoholic mother and her abusive father. People around the couple urged them to put their child up for adoption but they pair wouldn’t have it. They couldn’t stand the thought of being seen as less than because they gave up their child, but in actuality they were incredibly selfish and hoped that Austen could turn into welfare check for them. 
They kept Austen until she was five. And while she doesn’t remember those years she still has some lasting trauma responses from them. She wasn’t ever cared for when she was little. Maybe the first year or so her mom pretended to love her, but she was on formula so her mom could pick the bottle back up as soon as they were out of the hospital. Her need for alcohol more important than her newborn daughter. 
After that things went downhill. Her parents would leave her alone in their small apartment, the neighbors would hear her crying and sometimes they would call the Department of Child Services, and sometimes they just let the little girl cry. The money in the house went to booze and cigarettes, food was scarce. Austen teetered on the edge of malnutrition a lot, but a few kind neighbors snuck her food when her parents were out.
Just after her fifth birthday she finally got put into the system, CPS finally deemed that her parents were unfit to care for her. It only took five years, countless beatings, and a lack of care for them to see that two people who should’ve never been parents weren’t what the girl needed. 
She was in the foster care system for a few years, it was tough but it was a little better than being with her birth parents. She never stayed in one place all that long, she lived out of a suitcase which is something she carried with her for years. 
When she was 9 she got placed with the Wolfe family. A lovely couple in their 40s who had good hearts and actually wanted to care for a child. 
To say they clicked instantly wasn’t an understatement. The Wolfes and Austen just seemed to work, like they were the people she was supposed to call mom and dad all along. 
About a year after she first came to them they formally adopted her and she changed her name from Anderson to Wolfe. She finally felt like she was where she was supposed to be, she had two parents that truly loved her. 
Shortly after she was adopted her mom got sick, the doctors thought it was nothing serious but within a few weeks the woman could barely get out of bed. It wasn’t long after that the mysterious illness took the woman. 
She had been so close to being settled and the loss shook her to her core. Everything seemed uncertain now. She refused to get settled at home, she still lived out of her suitcase. Sure she had a closet full of clothes but she was ready to leave at a moments notice. 
While she was always a little on edge the rest of her time at home was pretty uneventful. Her father did everything he could to shower her with love and his heart broke seeing how unsettled his daughter was. 
Austen went to therapy and tried to everything to heal from her past but it seemed nearly impossibly, that there was so much that happened to her that she couldn’t access and work through. 
She went to school for statistics, setting herself up to get a job as a data analyst shortly after graduation but her real passion was photography.
She loved capturing the beauty of the things around her, all the beauty she wished to see in her own life. Sometimes she walks or drives around for house to find the perfect place to take photographs. While digital is in right now, she has her own dark room that she loves to use.
She also dabbles in wedding photography, the extra cash was always nice. 
While she is determined to get past the hurt of her childhood sometimes it all feels like its too much. 
She keeps to herself most of the time, very cautious of the company she keeps. She fiercely protective of the people she lets in and will always go out of her way to help someone in need. 
When she’s around people trusts she’s fiery, funny, and chill. She goes with the flow and lives in the moment.
She has a heart of gold even if it’s a little cracked. 
LINKS:
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Headcanons
Desires
Random Things
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lastsonlost · 7 years
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PHOENIX — Nick Olivas became a father at 14, a fact he wouldn't learn for eight years.
While in high school, Olivas had sex with a 20-year-old woman. As he sees it now, she took advantage of a lonely kid going through a rough patch at home.
State law says a child younger than 15 cannot consent with an adult under any circumstance, making Olivas a rape victim. Olivas didn't press charges and says he didn't realize at the time that it was even something to consider.
The two went their separate ways. Olivas, now 24 and living in Phoenix, graduated from high school, went to college and became a medical assistant.
Then two years ago, the state served him with papers demanding child support. That's how he found out he had a then-6-year-old daughter.
Nail polish may prevent date rape
"It was a shock," he said. "I was living my life and enjoying being young. To find out you have a 6-year-old? It's unexplainable. It freaked me out."
He said he panicked, ignored the legal documents and never got the required paternity test. The state eventually tracked him down.
Olivas said he owes about $15,000 in back child support and medical bills going back to the child's birth, plus 10 percent interest. The state seized money from his bank account and is garnisheeing his wages at $380 a month.
FEAR AND FRUSTRATION
He has become one of the state's 153,000 active child-support cases, according to the Arizona Department of Economic Security division of Child Support Services.
In May alone, payments were not made in 49 percent of those cases, according to the agency.
Olivas' fear has turned to frustration.
He wants to be in his daughter's life and is willing to pay child support going forward. But he says it's not right for the state to charge him for fees incurred when he was still a child himself or for the years he didn't know the girl existed.
"Anything I do as an adult, I should be responsible for," he said. "But as a teenager? I don't think so."
Situations such as Olivas' are rare, according to fathers-rights advocates. But cases in several states have garnered attention. Although there has been some public outcry over charging a crime victim with child support, the courts have consistently said states have every right to do so.
KANSAS, CALIFORNIA CASES
The most well-known case was of a Kansas boy who, at age 13, impregnated his 17-year-old baby-sitter. Under Kansas law, a child under the age of 15 is legally unable to consent to sex. The Kansas Supreme Court in 1993 ruled that he was liable for child support.
California issued a similar state court ruling a few years later in the case of a 15-year-old boy who had sex with a 34-year-old neighbor. In that case, the woman had been convicted of statutory rape.
In both cases, it was the state social-services agency that pursued the case after the mother sought public assistance.
"The Kansas court determined that the rape was irrelevant and that the child support was not owed to the rapist but rather to the child," said Mel Feit, director of the New York-based advocacy group the National Center for Men.
In Arizona, the Department of Economic Security oversees child--support enforcement. Its written policy is not to exempt situations like Olivas' from child-support responsibilities, unless the parent seeking child support has been found guilty of sexual assault with a minor or sexual assault.
"We don't see those cases very often, and we're really glad for that," said attorney Janet Sell, chief counsel with the Attorney General's Office's Child and Family Protection Division.
FOCUS ON THE CHILD
But DES officials said the intent of the rule is to ensure that the child, who had no control over the situation, is cared for.
Feit said if the roles were reversed and the woman was the victim, the scenario would be unthinkable.
"The idea that a woman would have to send money to a man who raped her is absolutely off-the-charts ridiculous," he said. "It wouldn't be tolerated, and it shouldn't be tolerated."
California adopts 'yes means yes' law
Feit said the basic legal premise of a rape is that the victim can't be held responsible. And with statutory rape, even if the victim participates, he or she can't be held responsible.
"We're not going to hold him responsible for the sex act, so to then turn around and say we're going to hold him responsible for the child that resulted from that act is off-the-charts ridiculous," he said. "It makes no sense."
Arizona also has no exemption for children born to children, although the state cannot get a court order for child support against the non-custodial parent until that parent becomes an adult.
It also doesn't matter to the state whether the non-custodial parent knows about the child or not. Child support is a separate legal issue from custody.
The state requires parents seeking public assistance under the state's welfare programs to first pursue child support. The child-support payments then are used to help reimburse the state for assistance payments.
"They have to comply with us," said Scott Lekan, DES child support operations administrator. "We're trying to keep them off the cash assistance, and we're trying to get back some of the cash assistance money. It benefits everybody at the end of the day."
The state has more routes than the courts to acquire money from a parent. It can garnishee wages up to 50 percent of disposable income. It can take a tax refund. It can put a lien on a home or a vehicle. It can suspend driver's licenses or revoke passports. And it can seize money out of bank accounts.
"Our biggest source of income is from income-withholding orders to employers," Lekan said.
Under Arizona's child-support formula, non-custodial parents may keep their first $903 to cover their own living expenses. A child-support payment amount is then set based on the remaining money.
Olivas is trying to fight some of the child-support costs, but says he can't afford a lawyer.
He also is trying to see his daughter.
"I lost my mom at a young age. I know what it's like to only have one parent," he said. "I can't leave her out there. She deserves a dad."
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safehavenbabyboxes · 5 years
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Scared Mom Places Her Newborn in a Safe Haven Baby Box, Now The Baby Has a Loving Adopted Family
By: Monica Kelsey
As the first signs of spring usher in plentiful sunshine and warm weather, it’s a time to celebrate new life and new beginnings. That’s why April is Safe Haven Awareness month. Since the founding of Safe Haven Baby Boxes (SHBB) in 2015, our organization has been dedicated to saving lives, and the fruits of our labor have never been more evident.
After reading story after story of newborns thrown in dumpsters, left in the woods, and abandoned near creeks, I decided to focus my own pain of being a child conceived in rape and abandoned at birth to ensure that new mothers had options when it came to the safety and security of their babies. Through prayer, hard work, and help from a small group of dedicated volunteers, SHBB was born. By pulling together, we turned talk into action, addressing the tragic consequences of abandonment by providing a safe, secure environment for scared and confused mothers to leave their babies. This is the mission of SHBB and my personal passion.
While most people believe that SHBB only is about putting boxes in buildings and getting our name on TV, our mission extends far beyond the box and a surrender. Our goal is to assist new mothers through and beyond the crisis that brought them to us. Little did I know when I first embarked on this journey that I would become friends with many of the women who used the Safe Haven Law and with the loving people who adopt these newborns. It’s a journey replete with tears and unimaginable joy. Frequently, we are asked about what happens when a mother has second thoughts after surrendering her baby. One such mother—let’s call her Heather—had just this experience.
Upon giving birth in 2018, Heather decided to place her newborn in one of our Safe Haven Baby Boxes. After a change of heart, she contacted us eight days later to ask about regaining custody of her baby. Our core mission at SHBB is not only the physical welfare of babies whose mothers can’t care for them, but about the welfare of these mothers and saving them from a lifetime of guilt and regret. In response to her plea, the entire SHBB organization rallied behind Heather. Using funds from the SHBB Legal Defense Fund, our organization hired an attorney and began the process of reuniting and supporting this mother and the child she loves so much.
In cases such as Heather’s, the reunification of Mom and baby has both legal and emotional challenges. After hearing Heather recount the details surrounding the baby’s surrender, I had no doubt that the infant was hers; however, the Indiana Department of Child Services legally is required to establish parentage. A judge ordered a DNA test on both Heather and the baby. After a few weeks, the results confirmed it—Heather was indeed the biological mother of the surrendered child.
Although the confirmation of the DNA test buoyed everyone’s spirits, our work with Heather was not yet done. The emotional challenges still facing this young woman and her baby were daunting. Heather was seriously considering adoption for her newborn. In working with Heather, it became evident that the gut-wrenching emotions she experienced when initially choosing to surrender her baby were playing out again as she wrestled with deciding what was best for her precious child. After praying, consulting with SHBB staff, and reviewing more than 10 family bios under consideration for adoption, Heather decided to place her child with a family she grew to know and love.
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Since the adoption, Heather has struggled with her decision. She is one of the strongest women I’ve ever met. To allow her own heart to break for the betterment of her child is a clear example of the selflessness that mothers-in-crisis exhibit when deciding safely to surrender their babies. Through this journey, Heather allowed me to walk with her, step by step, as she made the most difficult decision of her young life. I was and continue to be honored to walk beside her. Today, Heather’s baby is thriving because a young woman had the courage to reach out, and by the grace of God, SHBB was there to heed her call.
Since SHBB’s inception in 2015, we have worked in numerous states with thousands of women just like Heather, helping them make the best choices for themselves and their babies. SHBB and the National Safe Haven Crisis Hot Line (1-866-99BABY1) have referred over 500 women to crisis pregnancy centers across America, assisted with 6 adoptions and facilitated a record number of safe surrenders in many states. Safe Haven Baby Boxes continues to pave the way for women in this country who want 100% anonymity.
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