#also ​thanks for dealing with that nonsense earlier we’re back to the normal stuff <3

[grailfinders]

Fate and Phantasms #157

Today on Fate and Phantasms we’re making Emiya Alter! No, not that one, the one they gave a really dumb nickname to.

Anyway, Demiya is a Vengeance Paladin to take down anyone who would threaten humanity (and protect himself from mind control nonsense) as well as a Hexblade Warlock to project whatever blades he might need straight into enemies. I know he made the deal with Alaya, but it made him good with swords, so it’s probably fine.

Check out his build breakdown below the cut, or his character sheet over here!

Next up: Man’s worst nightmare

Race and Background

Despite your arguments to the contrary, you’re still a Human, giving you +1 Strength and +1 Dexterity. You also get proficiency in Insight to be a better investigator, and the Fighting Initiate feat, because paladins don’t get the Archery fighting style normally. This gives you +2 on ranged weapon attacks.

What was it that turned you to the path of Alterness? Whatever it was, it made you a Haunted One, giving you proficiency with Investigation and Arcana, as well as a healthy hatred for anything Kiara-based.

Ability Scores

You’re good with guns and small swords, plus you fight shirtless, so make sure your Dexterity is as high as possible. Second is going to be Charisma. You’re a pretty scary guy, we need it for multiclassing,and it’ll help you shoot good later. Your Wisdom is also pretty good, thanks to your built-in mental protection. You’re too affected by your Alterfication to get affected by anything else. Your Strength isn’t that bad, you do use melee weapons too at times and we also need it for multiclassing, but your Constitution is rather low. Kintsugi is very pretty, but it’s not a great way to build a person. Finally, we’re dumping Intelligence. It’s less that you’re dumb, more that you just absolutely don’t care about stuff enough to get scholarly on most subjects.

Class Levels

1. Paladin 1: Paladins get better hit dice and the martial weapons we need for that Fighting Initiate we got, so we’re kinda stuck starting there. First level paladins get proficiency with Wisdom and Charisma saves, as well as two paladin skills. Intimidation is pretty self-explanatory, but you also get Athletics. Look, you’ve got pretty good abs, they had to come from somewhere.

You also get a Divine Sense, letting you sense threats to humanity nearby, and Lay on Hands for a bit of free healthcare for you or whoever else you touch. You get 5 hp of healing per paladin level per long rest, and you can use 5 points from that amount to heal a poison or disease.

Yeah, first level isn’t particularly in-character, but it’ll get better later.

2. Paladin 2: Second level paladins get another Fighting Style, so grab Close Quarters Shooter from the underdark UA for sick melee ranged attacks. This negates the disadvantage caused by making a ranged attack near hostiles, your ranged attacks ignore all but full cover, and you get another +1 to ranged attack rolls.

You also learn how to cast an prepare Spells using your Charisma. You can either use your new spell slots for, y’know, spells, or for a Divine Smite to add on extra radiant damage to a melee attack. Ranged attacks in melee range don’t count, sadly.

As far as prepared spells go, Detect Evil and Good can help hunt down baddies, ditto with Protection from Evil and Good. 

3. Paladin 3: At third level, you can at long last devote yourself to Vengeance!, giving you the spells Bane to trip up foes and Hunter’s Mark to stick some serious damage onto your enemies over time. You also get Channel Divinity once per short rest that you can use in two ways.

Abjure Enemy spends an action to force a wisdom save (DC 8+charisma mod+proficiency) or one creature is frightened for up to a minute or until it takes damage. While frightened, it can’t move. On a success, the creature’s speed is halved for a minute or until it takes damage.

Alternatively, you can swear a Vow of Enmity as a bonus action, giving you advantage on attacks against a nearby creature for a minute or until it hits 0 hp.

You also get Divine Health, making you immune to disease. Like half your body is gold, it’s not like sniffles are a big concern at this point.

4. Paladin 4: Use your first Ability Score Improvement to grab the Crossbow Expert feat. There’s a lot of overlap with Close Range Shooter, but you can now attack multiple times per turn with a crossbow, and you can use your bonus action to attack with a hand crossbow if you attack with a one-handed weapon with your main action. Unfortunately, that’s the one kind of crossbow that won’t work with warlocks, but for now it’s fine.

5. Paladin 5: Fifth level paladins get an Extra Attack, letting you attack twice per turn anyway! Making great use of feat you just got.

You also learn second level spells! Your freebies are Hold Person and Misty Step. Admittedly neither are really in character for you, but if you want to power game Hold Person gives you guaranteed critical hits on the held person, which is super busted when combined with your smites. Food for thought.

Otherwise you can use Magic Weapon and other smites to make normal swords into fancy magic swords.

6. Warlock 1: Bouncing over to warlock for a bit puts you in a pact with an even fancier magic weapon: a Hexblade. You might not have a soul any more, but you do have a Hexblade’s Curse, which you can put on one unlucky bastard as a bonus action once per short rest. The target’s cursed for 1 minute, during which: You add your proficiency to damage against the target, crit on 19s, and you gain HP equal to your warlock level+your charisma modifier when they die.

You also become a Hex Warrior, turning one non-two handed weapon into a charisma based weapon instead of dexterity or strength. You can also use this on any kind of weapon made with your pact weapon feature later.

Finally, you get Pact Magic, which is pretty similar to your old magic except it recharges on short rests instead of long ones. While the spell slots don’t blend like other multiclassing builds, you can use warlock slots to cast paladin spells and vice versa.

Speaking of warlock spells, you get Eldritch Blast to summon gunfire and Sword Burst to summon swords right into people. You also get Cause Fear because that’s most people’s natural reaction to you and Expeditious Retreat to stay in archery range. Just because you can fight in melee range doesn’t mean you should.

7. Warlock 2: Second level warlocks get Eldritch Invocations. Like usual, we’re saving one for level three, but you still get Armor of Shadows now for free Mage Armor on yourself. Now you can finally rip your shirt off and make Kintoki jealous!

You also learn Comprehend Languages. Alaya probably wouldn’t drop you off in someplace without giving you the language to get around, right? Right?

8. Warlock 3: Your pact boon, as you can probably guess, is the Pact of the Blade, letting you summon pretty much any melee weapon you could want as an action. It also counts as magic for overcoming resistance, making the Magic Weapon thing from earlier pointless.

That invocation we were saving becomes Improved Pact Weapon, which expands your pact weapon choices to pretty much any ranged weapon you could want and it gives any weapon you make +1 to attacks and damage.

Honestly there aren’t that many second level spells that I think really fit Emiya as a warlock, but Blur is nice. If you’re going to be nameless, you might as well be faceless too, I guess.

9. Paladin 6: Going back to paladin for a bit lets you create an Aura of Protection, adding your charisma modifier to any save you or allies within 10′ of you make. It’s not an enormous buff, but a +2 is a +2, take what you get.

10. Paladin 7: Seventh level vengeance paladins are Relentless Avengers. When you hit a creature with an attack of opportunity, you can move half your speed as part of the reaction an ignore opportunity attacks. Like a lot of paladin goodies, this doesn’t pair well with your guns, but you do have swords as well.

11. Paladin 8: Another ASI at last! Bump up your Charisma for better saves and spells.

12. Warlock 4: Use this ASI to become Tough for an extra 24 HP now and another 2 each level. If you want to get in close, you’d better be able to take a hit. Also, you’re part gold. Sure it’s a soft metal, but it’s still a metal. That’s worth a few HP.

You also learn True Strike because I’m really hoping you’re aiming those things, and Shadow Blade for yet another sword you can summon.

13. Warlock 5: Fifth level warlocks get another invocation and a third level spell. Spirit Shroud makes all your swords a little bit sharper, dealing extra damage to and slowing down creatures in a 10′ radius. You also get Eldritch Smite, which burns through warlock slots to deal extra force damage, and can be used with ranged weapons.

14. Paladin 9: Ninth level paladins also get third level spells, like Haste which adds to your AC, bumps up your speed, and gives you and extra action for the duration. When the spell ends you have to take a turn to chill, but it’s totally worth it. You also get Protection from Energy, which... I mean if someone’s throwing around acid arrows, yeah go for it. Otherwise you can get more smites and Elemental Weapon for more fancy weapons.

15. Paladin 10: Tenth level paladins get an Aura of Courage, preventing allies in it from being frightened. I’d be more worried about charms, but honestly your wisdom save is pretty good at this point.

16. Paladin 11: Your Improved Divine Smite means you can add radiant damage to melee attacks even when you have no spell slots to burn; unfortunately that’s still just melee attacks, not ranged attacks.

17. Paladin 12: At seventeenth level you can finally use this ASI to bump your Charisma up past the point where your dexterity started, meaning your attaks finally get a bit more accurate thanks to being a Hex Warrior. This also bumps up your spell effectiveness and all your saves.

18. Paladin 13: Thirteenth level paladins get fourth level spells, like Banishment and Dimension Door. You also get access to yet another new smite for yet another new sword.

19. Paladin 14: Your last mainline paladin goodie is a Cleansing Touch, spending an action to end a spell affecting yourself or a willing creature charisma mod times per long rest. You’d think this anti-Kiara protection is coming late, but to be honest you probably should be level 20 to take on a Beast of Humanity.

20. Paladin 15: Your capstone level makes you a Soul of Vengeance, letting you make opportunity attacks on a creature affected by your Vow of Enmity if they try to attack anyone. Again, this only affects melee attacks.

Pros:

Mixing your Hexblade’s Curse and Vow of Enmity together means you’re really good at dealing crits with basically four times the odds of critical attacks each attack compared to your regular fighter. This is especially good for a character that can double smite like you can, dealing serious burst damage easily.

You also deal consistent damage with a +14 to hit and several different ways to stick more damage onto your attacks, like the afforementioned curse, Hunter’s Mark, or Spirit Shroud.

Thanks to your warlock slots recharging on short rests, you can go ham on smites a bit more than most people could, making your Unlimited Lost Works available to you more than other paladins.

Cons:

You’re a paladin specializing in ranged attacks. Admittedly the only things really making you a ranged fighter are your fighting styles, which can easily be changed, but if you’re playing to character you’ll find it a bit harder to use your paladin features.

Another reason staying at range is a good idea is your Concentration saves are really bad, with a total of +0 and no way to improve them.

Starting as a paladin but then adding in hexblade later means you have something of an awkward beginning, with your first couple ASIs not really contributing much to your character, with those first few mostly making up for your weaknesses rather than playing to your strengths.

#fgo #Fate Grand Order #Emiya Alter #D&D 5e #DND #Warlock #Paladin

[blackcatanna]

Kinky TB Adventures (probably) with Okita Part 1: Kyoto Winds

Finally playing another Hakuoki route because I spent 10 hours travelling yesterday and I deserve some imaginary romance, damn it! Choosing Okita because he seems fun and I hate that he disappears from the story pretty early on in most routes and then dies off screen :'(

WARNING: I wrote a lot :) 

Intro:

I don't know why but Kodo's evil old man face made me laugh so much during the intro.

Playing the prologue because it has a hearty chunk of Okita in it and it's been a while since I played the game.

Chizuru talking about the invisible wall between herself and other people is relatable af :')

"I'm not sure if I belong here... No. No, that's all in my head." < < < ME. Hello imposter syndrome, my old friend :')

I now feel like a li'l bitch for complaining about my journey yesterday when Chizuru WALKED nearly 500KM from Edo to Kyoto X_X

I'm loving this old timey film effect on the Kodo flashback.

I feel like Kodo's actions and motivations change depending on the route so I'm not going to try too hard to wrap my head around them here.

I love that "Ronin" is basically shorthand for "Evil Douchebag Thug" in this game X_X

Yukimura: "Be careful, father! Kyoto is a dangerous place!" Also Yukimura: "I have nothing to fear because I look like a BOY :) " Selfless but foolish X_X Although, you could argue that being reckless is selfish because it disregards your loved ones' feelings, should you get hurt.

At least the game gives these ronin names :') although... they don't have eyes. I think I'd rather have eyes, if I had to choose.

"I could still hear the ronin cursing loudly" I just have an image of these three guys running through the streets of Kyoto yelling, "FUCK. SHIT. PISS. ASS."

This game invested a lot in blood effects and sounds and I respect and appreciate that.

"He died with the first blow" Silver linings?

"They were... broken" :'(

Awe, the furies look so happy to see me :') JK, this scene is appropriately chilling. They do have big smiles, though.

More blood splashes and visceral blood descriptions :')

Okita, your sadism is showing.

Or maybe he knows that Saito doesn't like killing his comrades and that's why he wanted to kill them first :O :O :O

"if you just sat back and let them kill the kid, you could have saved us some trouble." -_- I enjoy Okita's banter but I have a feeling that it's going to be a bit one sided because Chizuru doesn't do back talk X_X

WAIT A FUCKING SECOND, WHY IS OKITA NOT BLINKING?!??

Oh here we go. Let's take a moment to worship Hijikata. I still think that Saito and Okita are better looking but sure, let's take a break to gush about "smooth, dark hair" in the moonlight and "the wistfulness of flower petals" "as if the cherry trees were blooming out of season" X_X ick.

HEY. CHIZURU. REMEMBER WHO RESCUED YOU. IT WASN'T THIS FUCKER.

OH GOD, IT CONTINUES, "His voice was cold and quiet, like a blade of ice. Blue-white moonlight lit his slender face.." blah blah ick.

OH, WE'RE STILL NOT DONE?!? "But it wasn't the sword making my breath catch. It was his eyes. They were fierce and hard, but somewhere behind them... I could catch a glimpse of... something else." Blah blah, troubled, mercy, blah

"Run, and I will kill you. Do you understand?" SPLOOSH (yes, I have been watching Archer)

I was sort of joking about being aroused by threats of violence but swords are definitely sexier than... whatever that whole flowery passage was...

Okita still is not blinking O_O

Hijikata telling Okita to shut up is a mood. Sorry, Okita.

Okay, NOW Okita's blinking. Guess all it took was Hijikata suggesting that they're going to kill me for a change. Apparently, only Okita's allowed to threaten to murder me X_X

Side note: if anyone reads this and is wondering if I'm aware that I switch between "You", "Me" and "Chizuru" then yes, I am and no, I don't care.

Apparently, Okita blinking was a fluke. Maybe he only blinks when he is pushed off stride or, like, flustered or surprised?

Also, I don't tend to think of Okita as being especially tall but he's taller than Hijikata!

"So we should just kill people now?" Um... you don't do that?

"What?! Come on, you can't be serious" HE SAID, BLINKING AND THUS BACKING UP MY THEORY.

"Almost as if I was being... drawn into their world..." Oh dear! We wouldn't want that to happen, that's not why we bought the game at all! :P

"A world where there is nothing strange in carrying on a normal conversation in the dead of night with corpses for company." Edgy. Although, I hope that this conversation is far from normal O_O

"As you wish." Hijikata is Saito's Princess Buttercup. I'm not jealous.

WHOA. I was just musing about death as usual and now Okita's RIGHT UP IN MY FACE.

"We did save you, didn't we?" WELL, TECHNICALLY, Saito saved me. You suggested letting the furies KILL ME.

"I didn't realise right away he was speaking to me." How? He's taking up the entire screen?

"Thank you very much." Fair. "I apologise for not thanking you earlier." Okay, calm down. It's not like they gave you a chance to speak in between death threats.

"The man called Hajime also looked confused. His eyes were wide and he had an expression I couldn't place." Then allow me: STARTLED ERMINE. Hijikata's is DISGRUNTLED HORSE and Okita's is SMUG LYNX. Aka: how three different animals react to the discovery that their prey is a girl. I know that horses don't hunt prey. However, they do have to deal with it when their animal subordinates unwittingly capture it.

"He broke out in laughter again, so much so that he was forced to wipe a few tears from his eyes" I'M SO GLAD THAT YOU'RE HAVING SUCH A JOLLY TIME, YOU ASS.

Now that he's figured out that I'm a girl, he's suddenly keen to introduce himself :P

"The one you should be thanking for saving you is Hajime Saito" CORRECT.

Is he deliberately trying to let him kill me by giving out as much info as possible? O_o

"His fingers like iron cables around my arm." Kinky.

"The cause of my horror wasn't the gruesome end that awaited me, but something else entirely." Hanging out with these crazy fuckers.

Chapter 1:

Damn, I wrote a lot more than I had expected for the prologue X_X

"My limbs were tightly bound in tight knots" I wouldn't be surprised if Okita was a shibari expert...

"This is no way to treat a guest of ours" Obviously, Inou-bae is trying to be kind but this feels like something a supervillain would say after their minions bring you to their lair X_X

"he smiled at me and winked" get this man a route! Actually, wait, how old is Chizuru... OKAY, FORGET I SAID THAT. NO ONE IS ALLOWED TO FLIRT WITH THIS 16 YEAR OLD GIRL. Although, maybe a dad route? No romance, just familial love. He's a better dad than Kodo. NO DADDY KINKS ALLOWED.

Apparently, Harada and Nagakura being "lively" is supposed to reassure me?!

Ah, Okita and his hilarious jokes about invading my personal space.

I'm so glad that Saito doesn't let him get away with this nonsense <3

And now we're sticking up for Saito and calling out Okita's bs <3

"the smile lingered through his bright eyes" Oo-er

"He looked more like a boy than a man." Says you!

The baka trio look so done X_X

"Their faces were still blessed with youth" Phew. Looks like we'll have some eye candy while we're brutally executed.

A STICK?!? THEY'RE CALLING ME A STICK?! HAVE THEY NOT SEEN THE ANIME INTRO?! CHIZURU HAS TITS!!!

"The hell I will, boy!" Calm down, Kratos.

"You could be taken for interrogating" not if you assholes don't make such a song and dance about me witnessing your shady activities! How would anybody know to interrogate me in the first place?!

"Let's just kill the kid" How about no!!!

"I was just kidding." WERE YOU, or did you just change your tune because daddy Kondou told you off? -_- I don't think Saito's buying your shit.

"Hehe." XD best response!

Side note, how am I the first person to witness the furies in action?! They run around the streets, chopping people up and there are already rumours about the Shinsengumi committing brutal crimes.

Also, how often do they sentence men to death? There are a lot of men in the fury corps and I bet that some choose death or try and run for it and die in the process.

"I think that Souji has a point" BOO, HARADA!

"Uh-oh. Well, this is going to make it even harder for us to simply let you go..." He's doing the not blinking thing again! Maybe that's because his prey is in his sights... O_O Also, thanks a lot, Heisuke X_X

"A man should always be ready to face death. You should make your peace with yours." Okay, first of all, I look like a child to you! Secondly, bit sexist! Not all men choose the path of the warrior. Thirdly, AS IF, I'm just going to lay down and accept my POINTLESS murder just for being in the wrong place at the wrong time. No, Nagakura, I am NOT okay with being MURDERED. How dare you imply that I'm a coward for not wanting to die for this BULLSHIT.

Not sure if I mentioned this last time but Sano's casual suicide comments remind me of being at uni :')

"there's something I want to look into." Is it my stuff? Are you going to go through my stuff now? X_X

"I... I'm sorry." I forgive you, Heisuke! As for everyone else who's acting like this is all my fault and you've done nothing wrong, fuck you. Y'all shouldn't be doing evil science in the first place, especially if you're then going to try and justify MURDERING everyone who glimpses the evulz.

This whole bit reminds me of a DnD party where everyone's arguing over whether or not to kill someone. This is definitely more like a DnD argument than your average movie argument X_X

"All right, Saito, take care of the kid." 😍 Yes, Saito, take care of me :D NOT IN A MURDERY WAY O_O

Time to RUN THE FUCK AWAY. Maybe, if they hadn't acted like murdering assholes, I wouldn't be doing this but they don't seem to give a fuck about me so AWAY I GO.

"I knew it was rude, but I had no choice but to try and open the sliding door with my toe." Priorities X_X They kidnapped you, tied you up and threatened to kill you countless times. Honey, you stick it to those fuckers with your shady toe opening.

WE DIDN'T EVEN MAKE IT OUT OF THE ROOM!!!

"Sorry," No your not -_- "but now we've got to kill you." No you don't!

"Then you may do whatever you like with me." Um, why is this the Okita romance option? XD Don't say those words to that sadist, who knows what he wants to do to you! O_O

"We aren't going to eat you or anything." ...Damn X_X I hope that your stance changes if we get married.

"Heh. Never seen such an innocent girl like you." Ugh. As if. Running around dressed as a boy. Can't be that innocent. Certainly not if he read my last comment :P . Anyway, YOU SOUND CREEPY, TALKING LIKE THAT XD

"All right, all right. Now, tell your big brother... Why were you cross-dressing around Kyoto?" THA FUCK DID YOU JUST CALL YOURSELF?!?? And MIND YOUR DAMN BUSINESS XD DON'T KINK SHAME ME!

"Well, 'she' claims to be a girl, but it's not like we have any actual proof, right?" Um, I'M not the one who said that I'm a girl and I DON'T LIKE WHERE THIS IS GOING. I WILL FIGHT YOU FUCKERS IF YOU COME NEAR ME >:(

"My apologies, but I took the liberty of checking through your belongings." I wouldn't mind, except NOT ONCE did they give me a chance to explain myself or plead my case. He could have just asked whatever he wanted to know and then checked my bags to verify it X_X

"Hey now," HEY NOW, NOW, sing this corrosion to me... No? I'll be quiet :(

"So, you've been withholding information from us?" YOU BARELY GAVE ME A CHANCE TO SPEAK, YOU DICK!

Welp, they've agreed not to kill me and yet Okita's still taking it upon himself to threaten me with death while fixing me with his unblinking, predatory stare X_X

"Gee, didn't take long for you to change your tune once you knew she was a girl, eh Shin?" TRUTH

"Having a lady here at headquarters is sure to brighten things up." Joke's on you: I'm a goth ;P

"you can't just pawn her off on someone else." Okita, nooooooo! Don't make me work for this grumpy bitch!

"I hope you you'll take good care of her." Wink wink, nudge nudge. What's the matter, Hijikata senpai? Am I not pretty enough for you? :'(

"You sons of BITCHES." HEY. HIJIKATA. NO NEED TO INSULT THEIR INNOCENT MOTHERS. Just call them straight up bitches :)

"The Shinsengumi keeping a woman here... If such rumours were to spread, tongues would begin to wag." Yeah, yeah, so we might as well just all fuck. People are going to say we're doing it, regardless, so let's get this over with...

Or I could keep pretending to be a man. That could also work.

"You're gonna get a room, and you're gonna stay in it." FUCK YOU

"I could have sworn we decided she was going to be someone's page" O_O FUCK YOU EVEN MORE, OKITA.

So... lonely... must... find... friends...

Okita and Saito friends :D

When I first played this game, I was really keen to find my "father" but now that I know what he's like, it's hard to muster quite the same level of enthusiasm X_X

"Draw your blade, unless it is merely decoration." Spicy! I'm glad that Yukimura is not so easily goaded into fighting.

"I'm not lying." You tell him, girl!

Saito and Okita's stunned faces when you suggest that you might accidentally hurt Saito are priceless! X_X I guess this shows that you take this seriously, though.

"Excuse me... You don't have to laugh..." XD Is this almost sassy?

Surprise, Okita likes it when I do what he says despite understandable reservations XD

Saito looks way too happy to be doing this XD was this just a chance for him to show off? :P

IS HE LAUGHING AT ME?!? XD RUDE!

WHA THA FUCK. I think that it was a glitch but there were suddenly about seven Saitos on screen. Maybe that's what it feels like when you're fighting him.

Woah, it happened again, only this time there were two and one was squashed.

I'm fine with there being more Saitos.

Aaaaand he's holding a sword at my throat... Sploosh? Shut up, swords are sexy. I probably watched too many period and fantasy films as a child...

"In the blink of an eye, his face was only inches from mine," O RLY? 😏 WAIT, I'm supposed to be playing Okita's route X_X Must... stop getting distracted...

"Your master should be proud." SAY IT AGAIN 😍

"I then noticed how wildly my heart was beating." Though not from fear, right? ;)

"You all right?" Kind words? FROM OKITA?!?

"polite applause" FROM OKITA!?!

"If you want, we'll keep you company." Yes, Okita, obviously I want that :D

First sign of madness: talking to your own head!

Okita could look less smug about catching me talking to myself -_-

"I wanted to scream, but before I could open my mouth, Saito stepped out from behind the door." X_X Well, they did say they'd keep me company.

"I think that's enough fraternising, Souji." Wait a second...

"I figured if I left the two of you alone, it would be longer before I saw either of you," ... Why does that sound slightly risqué? -_- I feel like this scene changes slightly depending on your affection levels...

-_- The only reason Heisuke is short is because Nagakura's stunted his growth by constantly stealing his food.

"How are we to deal with accepting such insanity?" MOOD.

Wait, does Okita subsist entirely on sake?! O_O

"Try not to worry about eating too much or being a freeloader or something. Just eat your little heart out, okay?" Surprisingly wholesome content from Okita :')

Takeda! <3 My douchey doppelganger!

"your adorable page" -_- Watch it, "big brother"

"I'm not having any of your insolence today." Hijikata temporarily transforming into a villainous English aristocrat.

And after aaaaallll that, I'm just going to stay behind to spend some quality time with Okita, probably X_X

"Huh!? Why? You're finally getting the chance to search for Kodo." GOOD POINT. However, gotta get that dick, amirite?

"Perhaps, I should have gone..." YUP. PROBABLY.

"Are you regretting it? If you are, then you should've just gone with them." TRUTH.

"He smiled wryly before continuing while touching my chin." WEEEEOOOOA WEEEEEOOOOA PHYSICAL CONTACT ALARM. WE HAVE INITIATED PHYSICAL CONTACT. IT WAS WORTH STAYING BEHIND AFTER ALL!

"You don't regret it at all? Not even if you knew that Hajime and I went out of our way to convince Hijikata?" Aw, y'all did that for me? Yeah, this is a terrible decision X_X Except for the part with the chin touching. I guess stalking you overrides all logic?

"I was surprised. Saito did make that promise" and what? You thought he was a liar? Girl.

"It was actually Hajime that convinced Hijikata." Not sure if Okita's being modest but this is making it reeeeally hard for me to stop myself fangirling over Saito. Again.

"When I see Saito later, I need to apologise and give my thanks to him." YOU BETTER. >:(

Did he just call me useless (in a battle)? XD I mean, he's not wrong... As we will no doubt soon find out...

Wait, wait... He just said that if I'm in danger, I will become a nuisance and he'll FRICKIN' STAB ME. WHAT?! DOESN'T THAT MAKE YOU THE GREATEST DANGER, OKITA!??

Chapter 2:

Did we ever apologise to Saito? X_X

"Please allow me to continue looking for my father!" Where was this enthusiasm earlier -_-

"If you want that risk, feel free to join us." Ooooooh, scary.

"Remember that you're here to keep me company" Um, excuse me!?

Burn down the city and kidnap the Emperor while everyone else is "losing their shit." This seems like the plan of crazy people o_O

"Would you care to join us." Kondou's making this raid sound like a dinner party X_X

Chizuru getting distracted by the more "elegant" night uniforms while preparing for the raid is a Big Mood.

Am I going crazy or does this game normally give me more choices here? Am I being paranoid or is it now shipping me with Okita? Can't I normally choose to go with Hijikata or stay behind?

"Giving the enemy a good, loud warning that he's about to kick the tar out of them. That's Kondou for you..." Okita kind of has a point X_X

"They sauntered towards the inn" Quite the image.

Oh shit! Okita's fighting Kazama O_O

"Okita was battling a ronin." Damn, you're lucky that Kazama can't read minds X_X

"Thanks for the dance, chump." -_- Kazama's such a dick.

"You're our enemy, so you've gotta die." Okita's philosophy is simple and elegant.

"His sword moved in large, crude arcs, while Okita fought with skill and finesse." Wow, SUPER glad that Kazama can't read minds O_O

EXECUTE PLAN: HURL BOWL AT KAZAMA.

IT'S SUPER EFFECTIVE: OKITA SENPAI NOTICED ME.

Wait... WHAT WAS THAT "WET CRUNCH" WHEN KAZAMA KICKED OKITA'S CHEST!??!? O_O IS THIS HOW HE GETS TB?!? O_O

"Wet, tearing coughs." OH FUCK O_O

"I like watching children squirm." WTF, Kazama. BEGONE, THOT.

:'O Injured Okita is trying to put himself between me and that crazy bitch <3

Oh damn, he is coughing e blood :'O

"What a fool" UUUURRRRGGGGH KAZAMA IS THE WORST. SOME PEOPLE CARE ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE, KAZAMA. AND SOME PEOPLE ARE WILLING TO PUT THEMSELVES IN DANGER BECAUSE THEY CARE ABOUT MORE THAN THEIR OWN SELFISH NEEDS.

"I... I can still fight..." NO.

"You always said you'd kill me if I got in your way..." OOOOOOOOOOOH! HERE WE GO! THE FAÇADE BEGINS TO SHOW CRACKS *munches popcorn*

Iba... y u no mention our shared childhood?

ISHIDA POWDERED MEDICINE.

Nagakura says that it's delicious... I wonder if it tastes like cough medicine. Cough medicine is delicious. And addictive...

"I would never have thought that Toudou or Okita would return from a fight injured..." Why, Inoue? Are skilled and strong warriors invincible?

"The injured are a burden, so we shall remain here and guard the compound like obedient soldiers." O_O Ouch, Sanan!

Wait, I don't get a choice to go with them?! I KNEW IT. THIS GAME KNOOOOOWS! I'm too far down the Okita path to turn back now, I guess.

"Um... " Chizuru is me trying to make small talk.

Weird isn't necessarily a bad thing, Chizuru! Take it as a compliment!

I feel bad for not realising how badly injured he got during the raid during my other playthroughs X_X

I thought that I'd somehow missed the scene with the children because this playthrough's taking so long because I'm making so many fricking notes X_X Turns out, I have a lot more to say when you actually get to spend time with the chosen boi.

"Oh, don't worry. I didn't kidnap them or anything." ... GOOD!????

"I was bored" Hey, I get lonesome too! Why can't you come play with me? D:

"They take care of me." Pretty cute. :3

"You wanna come play with us?" Duh!

"No" GURL

He really does look like a happy cat when he smiles!

Wow, these children have a lot of attitude.

"It's a place for men to do, um, work." Yes, just normal human work. Nothing funny going on here.

"They're catching bad guys and keeping Kyoto safe" "No, they're not. They're just killing people." These kids are SAVAGE :')

"Can't deny that" ... Way to back me up, Souji...

"I probably hear him talk about death everyday." Wait, really? What exactly does he have to say about death?

"The Shinsengumi are a bunch a weirdos." :') And that makes them extremely lovable!

Last time, I tried defending the Shinsengumi and Okita ended up terrorising a child so LET'S PICK THE OTHER OPTION AND SEE IF THERE'S LESS CRAZY...

"Don't tell me you're taking this seriously?" CHILDREN ARE THE FUTURE, OKITA!

"They all look like bad guys." Why? Because they're hot?

"I didn't know what I was supposed to do..." Uh, maybe tell this childries not to judge a book by its cover? Idk, maybe try and suggest that the world is not so black and white? Definitely don't mention the bloodlust.

"Grinning like an idiot." You're just jealous of his happiness, you cynical-ass child

"He's a wuss." UM, pretty sure he's the most powerful member of the Shinsengumi so stfu :P

"He grabbed the child" Oh dear... Here we go...

Okita! Use your words to teach the children a lesson! Not whatever this fucked up shit is X_X

Ah, ruling with fear! :') When has that ever backfired?

"I'll tell them I'm sorry. Then I'll tell them how awesome Kondou is." GUD. >:(

Uuuuugh, I'm so so tired and I've written so much CRAP so I will SLEEP and play the next bit tomorrow! :D

#hakuoki #hakuouki #okita #okita souji #SALT #kyoto winds

[infpisme]

10 Things You Should Know About Being In A Relationship With An INFP

Love is the life-blood of those who identify as the INFP personality type. As “lovers of love,” finding a compatible partner willing to investigate our complex nature can be hard. Thankfully, we found you.

In a relationship, our No. 1 desire is to be understood and accepted for who we authentically are. While INFPs are keenly self-aware, we can struggle to explain our perplexing ways to others. If you haven’t already noticed, we can be paradoxical, possessing many traits that contradict each other.

Getting to know an INFP can be an expedition full of surprising twists and turns. Here’s what you need to know about your compatibility with an INFP — and how to decode us in a relationship.

Who Is the Perfect Partner for an INFP?

Rest assured, any type is compatible with the INFP in a relationship — or with any other type. It is true, however, that INFPs tend to most commonly date certain types, which include the INTJ and ENFJ (ENFJs are often described as the “perfect match” for INFPs, although this is highly subjective).

Truth is, there are advantages (and drawbacks) to every match. INFPs who partner with a similar personality — like the ENFP, our extroverted twin — will have almost endless traits in common, but the two will share glaring weak spots with no one to balance them out. On the other hand, an INFP who choses to date or marry an ISFJ will have to overcome some major differences, but the ISFJ can help hold them accountable and keep them organized. (On the flip side, the INFP will help the ISFJ think big, dream big, and express the emotions they may normally bottle up.) There are some very strong couples who are complete opposites.

As with any relationship, maturity and communication are key. And nothing helps more than knowing what to expect from your INFP partner and understanding what they need in love and relationships.

10 Things You Need to Know if You’re in a Relationship with an INFP

So, here are 10 things you should know about us:

1. We reveal ourselves slowly.

In the beginning of a relationship with an INFP, you may notice their hesitance to reveal certain parts of themselves. Extremely private by nature, we reveal ourselves in layers, and the stuff that matters most to us will take time to unveil. We take emotional (and physical) intimacy very seriously, as we want to be sure that you are fully capable of accepting us.

Tip: Despite our reserved nature, one of our romantic ideals is to share our innermost self with you. But we may need help doing that, so ask (gentle) questions to draw us out. Conversely, pressuring us to open up may result in more resistance — we’re stubborn that way.

2. We’re genuine romantics.

Think: a Shakespearean sonnet as opposed to a Hallmark greeting card. Sure, we’ll enjoy those fresh flowers or dinner by candlelight, but more personalized gestures will make us really feel special.

Tip: A foolproof way to accomplish this is through handmade gifts. Whether masterful or loaded with imperfections, your gift is thoughtful because you put in the effort. Finding creative ways to say, “I love you” that are uniquely suited to your INFP demonstrate that you understand us — which is the greatest gift of all.

Bonus tip: After spending many years counseling couples, Dr. Gary Chapman concluded that there are five love languages, or in other words, five ways that people speak and understand emotional love. The five love languages are: words of affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service, and physical touch. I’ve noticed that INFPs tend to appreciate quality time the most. Try deliberately fitting us into your schedule for some one-on-one time so we can feel connected to you.

3. We’re hopelessly devoted to you.

Thanks to our ever-present idealism, when we fall, we fall hard… to the point where we might overlook our own needs and desires. We love to please others, especially you, the one we adore.

Harmony is important to us, and we value working together so we both win. Unfortunately, as the song lyrics suggest, being “hopelessly devoted” can result in staying in relationships that don’t serve us well. Due to our devotion, we’re sometimes taken advantage of — and we may end up damaging important parts of ourselves to serve our partner’s needs.

Tip: If your INFP has dealt with codependency in the past, remind them that it’s all about balance. Take care of them the best you can, but make sure they consider their own needs, too.

4. Take our emotions taken seriously.

INFPs think with their emotions. Using our dominant Introverted Feeling (Fi), we navigate the world via our personal feelings, tastes, and values. As a result, we feel things deeply and intensely — even when we don’t obviously display it.

Tip: If you aspire to understand an INFP, you must understand that emotions are how we perceive the world. And, you must aspire to respect this. We are accustomed to judgment and criticism when we share how we feel. Dismiss our emotions or values and you might as well be rejecting our entire self. Please choose to listen. And of course, kindly assist us when we aren’t being objective and it’s clearly called for.

5. We’re open-minded (most of the time).

Due to our auxiliary Extroverted Intuition (Ne), we have a penchant for exploring ideas, possibilities, and patterns. This is what makes us unconventional, easy-going, and (almost) always willing to try something new.

Nevertheless, these traits can come with the price of indecision. Don’t expect us to know where we want our life to be in five years — or where we want to go for dinner. We’re much better at laying out options and deciding together when the time is right.

It’s tempting to bask in the convenience of our open-mindedness, kicking around even the craziest ideas… until you hit up against one of our core values. We’re compromising — to a point — but when it comes to our ideals, we don’t give an inch.

Tip: Highly individualistic, each INFP will have values worth defending and standing by, no matter what. These may appear unexpectedly, and seem to come out of nowhere, so be ready for them. You don’t have to agree with what we believe (or feel), but if you show respect for it — and don’t push us to change on these key points — you will be even dearer to our hearts.

6. We can be cryptic.

Being direct can feel impossible for us, as Extroverted Thinking (Te) — our logical, no-nonsense straight-talking function — is our last and least developed cognitive function. That means we can be reluctant to divulge specific emotions straightaway, which can make our roundabout manner of communicating hard to decipher.

In moments of affection, this may mean we prefer to tell you how much we care about you through a heart-felt letter rather than a face-to-face conversation. In moments of frustration, we may unfortunately resort to passive-aggression, along with some uncharacteristic lashing out.

Tip: If we lash out, approach the situation directly, so it can be resolved. Try not to take this personally (we know, it’s hard). INFPs who feel “heard” will also feel loved, and INFPs who get a clear, direct message about your feelings will appreciate you even more.

7. We need a lot of time and space for processing — alone.

This need manifests a number of ways. As introverts, we need time by ourselves to regain lost energy. Our creative process also requires isolation so we can form new thoughts and ideas. Without sufficient alone time, we may become overwhelmed, irritable, and unable to focus.

Tip: Please note that alone time is the most critical when an INFP is processing their emotions. We often know how we feel instantaneously, but we need time to sort through our labyrinth of emotions before sharing them with others. Be mindful that we may be unable to properly share how we feel unless we’ve had time to think things over on our own.

8. We may need your help when we’re stressed.

Everyone has to deal with stress from time to time, but it can be particularly daunting for INFPs.

We can quickly become distraught when our perfectionism kicks in. Tedious day-to-day activities can add up and contribute to the madness. As I mentioned earlier, we have trouble being direct — and this applies to asking for help. Step in and help us when we need it, even if unasked, and we’ll love you for it.

Tip: Crossing things off our to-do list for us will win you major points, especially the little things. Sometimes we’ll need to vent while you dry our tears of exasperation. Thank you in advance for this; you don’t know how much it means to us.

9. We want you to be honest, despite how sensitive we can be.

Being completely honest with us can seem dangerous. We don’t take criticism well and can often respond emotionally when confronted with an issue. However, we truly believe that it doesn’t help anyone to withhold concerns, and we will become hurt if we realize that you can’t share your heart and mind with us completely.

Tip: INFPs can be receptive to negative statements if they are explained in a loving and affectionate manner. Try to phrase things in a way that won’t be perceived as an attack. We recognize compassionate intentions. Approaching potential conflict this way shows you’re trying to help us, and ultimately, help our relationship.

10. Be our rock.

The world can be a harsh place for the sensitive and emotional INFP. We regularly feel misunderstood. We worry that our attributes are not highly valued by those around us. We can struggle with crippling self-doubt. As a result, our imagination often serves as our place to retreat and feel free.

Tip (and the way to our heart): When we come back to reality, we want to rely on you, our romantic partner, first and foremost, for support and care. Be our refuge when we’re caught up in the unfairness of the world. Be our champion and point out when we’re not properly sticking up for ourselves. Be our source of comfort and assurance when we’re in need of empathy and a warm hug.

by Aute Porter, IntrovertDear

#infp #infp things #infp thoughts #infp problems #infp personality #introvertdear #aute porter

[bubwagon]

another nsfw post where i think about new dudes

When I go back to work on monday people are going to ask me how my trip went and the answer will be essentially i got a mild stomach flu the first day which meant i couldn't eat anything spicier than cream cheese bagel without experiencing mildly debilitating pain and discomfort so i didn't eat. and i hung out with a bunch of locals so i didn't see any sights. this is unrelated but because it was so hot and humid and loud (thanks nyc AC) i couldn't sleep. between friday evening and saturday i slept maybe 5 hours total. so i literally went to work, went to a FEW nice resturaunts, played overcooked, and fucked one of t's friends. and eeeeeeveryone could tell. i hope t isn't mad at me. everyone here knows i don't do casual hookups, but uh? well. 

here's how it happens. if anyone is reading this there's probably gonna be some explicit nsfw stuff later. i like keeping my thoughts organized and concrete, so everything ends up on bubwag. if i just think about it it'll drive me crazy in the end.

his name starts with j so let's just start with that. he's supposed to be one of t's best friends. he's kind of a gentle douche without actually being an asshole. he's very kind actually. he looked out for me a lot, which really turns my knees to jelly. big turn ons: people who act like they care about me and my wellbeing. we went out for a drink the first time and he paid for my drink. i had drunk earlier that night so the drink hit me a little harder than normal. i almost walked into traffic a few times and he held me back and we had a conversation for a few blocks where i insisted i wasn't drunk, i was just generally bad at traffic, and how he dare he mistake my general incompetency for drunken behaviour.

he left. i got up the next morning, went to chelsea market, went to a fancy resturaunt, went back to the apartment i was staying at and met up with him. instead of doing anything touristy we got boozy icecream and sat in madison square park and talked. i think that's when we started holding hands which was pretty nice and cute. him lying on the ground with his knees propped up, me with my back resting on his knees, both hands resting on his chest. i don't totally remember what we talked about. probably just nonsense. was that the overcooked night? i think so. holy shit that game is so fun with 3 engineers. when that night ended i started feeling like hot goddamn garbage so i went out for a walk. i called aishwarya. and i called matt. i kinda feel bad for matt because he was probably worried about me but i was like, getting medical advice or flirting with this new guy. his last text was something like "i'm thinking of you. hope you're safe" and i was like ohhhh noooooo. anyways aishwarya recommended gatorade which was a great idea and made me feel a lot better. or maybe the gatorade did nothing and it was just making out on a stoop in the new york city heat at 3:30am that got me. he dangled my headphones in front of my face and my first response was to bite at the buds. next thing he stuck in front of my face was his finger and i kissed it. he said "interesting response" and turned my chin in and we made oooutt. he's pretty fun to kiss. i could tell i was turned on because he touched my neck and my whole body shivered. how sensitive my neck is a bellcurve but the opposite. if i don't like the person it gets really sensitive in a flight/flee way. if i do, it's like one big nerve ending from my neck to my PUSSAY. in between i'm just like, ok man. we were on the way to boob grabbing before a guy walked past with his dog and we were both like, alright we're on a stoop. let's can this for now.

next day i woke up and got a tattoo, helped my cousin get engaged, went to a korean resturaunt, and went to a party. OH REMIND ME TO PAY BACK THE VENMOS. at the party i bonded hard with his ex (lmao) and some other people. they're all very nice. but it's a hard group to break into. i like them all though. the night ended with a lot of me applying makeup on other people. i walked out twice. once to call aishwarya in the elevator (running theme in my life) and another time to get more gatorade. and both times he was like hey i was looking for you. actually the first time was him checking in, the second time was him being like we r LEAVING. there was kind of a weird moment where i got on the piano and he followed me and we were just clicking some keys and it was something about how this wasn't totally expected and i dropped my head on my hands for like two minutes. he was like, hey what's going on? and i didn't know how to be like I HAVE A STORIED HISTORY OF MEETING MY FRIEND'S FRIENDS AND HOOKING UP WITH THEM AND I THINK THERE MAY BE SOMETHING WRONG WITH ME and he was like i dunno i think that's kind of an external thing maybe this just happened. and honestly like, yeah it's Fine that it happens.

when we left i encouraged his ex to go back to the house to fuck the birthday boy (long story) but he and i walked back to the apartment i was staying in. i laid down on the floor and we started kissing. i was so tired. i had gotten an hour and a half of fitful sleep the night before. i gotten a tattoo, a touchup, and helped my cousin get ENGAGED, and then i drank a ton. it was like 4am. but then we started to hook up! he's..... really good at eating pussy. like jesus. he was like if you're too tired we don't have to do anything, and i was like, listen you kissed my neck we gotta keep going. he's soooo much fun to fuck. honestly he's a little too agressive for my personal tastes but it's..... really fun. it kind of feels like being on a rollercoaster with only your ankles strapped in. he's a lot bigger and buffer than the average guy i've hooked up with, and i definitely kind of felt like he could break me in half if he wanted to, which i'm kind of into.

hey here's a thing i forgot to mention. when he looks at me he smiles a little. when i look back at him i also end up smiling, but he smiles a little more. i feel shy around him. not like a shy person, but comparatively shy. he's confident and loud. he can look someone straight in the eye from half a foot away without looking away.

the next morning i woke up a few hours before the other person in the apartment did and hung out with him on the couch. he kept kissing my neck knowing i'd shiver and collapse in his arms. it's hard to say no because it feels really good but i didn't need to be incredibly turned on while we were doing pg13 hangouts with their friends. eventually i was like alright you need to see what you've done and i stuck his hand down my pants and his eyes got all wide and he was like yeah you're soaked. i made a joke at some point that every dude i've hooked up with has wanted to slap my ass and stick their fingers in my mouth after they've been up my pussy. and he was like what? and i said what you don't want me to suck your fingers like a tiny cock and he said well when you say it like that. he's a physically affectionate person, much like i am. he doesn't usually just hold you, he runs his fingers down your back or plays with your hair. it's nice, i like that.

oh here's another factor: originally he was going to the jersey shore sunday afternoon because he's going to be at a beach for a few days. i'm flying out of newark, which is where he lives, so i asked if i could stay over even if he was gone. actually here's how the conversation went: i was going to say something kind of inappropriate what? you gotta tell me now oh i was just going to say something about how i'm good but i don't know if i'm missing out on a beach house good. and he was like wow that's intriguing eventually he decided to leave monday morning instead so what can i say i'm cooompelling.

i went home with him and as you could imagine we did a lil more hooking up. first time super great. god he is super attractive. he's not even normally the kind of person i go for. like he's not?? i dunno if he's the most visually attractive person i've ever been with, but i'm really attracted to him as a person. his body is nice and strong even if he has fratboy hair and a beard that kept scratching my chin. and i really like his soft, gentle smile. and he has nice friendly eyes. and again?? pussy eating???? wow. it's not normally my favourite but he keeps it good. second time he tried i got all panicky and i had to do the big hey i was raped! reveal. and he just kept smiling at me and let me say the things i needed to say about it. he was apparently a sexual assault counsellor so he was just gentle and kind about it. i asked if that changed the way he thought about what we had previously done and would change how much he would want to hook up with me again. and he said no. it's just a part of me and not a Big Deal. he asked me if he had done anything and i told him no. it just happens. i said i am fighting the urge to apologize and he said no, i don't want to hear it. people are really reacting positively and kindly to the fact that i was raped a bunch! wow, maybe it's not that big of a dealbreaker after all. we went to round two eventually after he kept grazing the side of my boob and he was like your heartrate is really fast. weirdly, a big turn on for me. or not a turn on. it's very endearing and sweet to me when people pick up on my body language or queues. it feels like they understand something about me i didn't have to tell them. annnd then we fucked some more! he can actually throw me around it's... really fun. i appreciate that after he came all over my body he wiped me off with a tissue. it's the small things. then we showered together and that was also sweet and fun. he soaped me off and kept turning me around so i'd get evenly clean.

weird cute thing: singing electric love by borns lying together with our lips really close, basically kissing if the word called for it

we went to bed and he turned off the AC in case the sound bothered me. and i slept better and more soundly in his bed than i have at any other point in my trip. which is exactly what i needed because i kind of started to feel like my body was giving up.

i left this morning. we squeezed in ONE MORE FUCK! he did one thing i really liked which is he went like... a lil in, and then out, and then a lil in, and then out, and then all the way in w/ his hand on my neck wow that was hot. then after a pretty short cuddle i had to leave. he gave me a lil plastic bag of almonds and walnuts and a golden delicious apple since the only thing i had in my system by then was CUM which does not settle very well. he seemed kind of stressed out. i asked him if he was okay and he said i'm worried you'll miss your flight, and i was like nah i'll be fine.

and i was! we're still talking a little right now. he's coming to visit like right before my birthday and i was like hey DUDE u wanna fuck just lemme know and he was like yeah i do but i'm here for like 36 hours so let's just play it by ear. which makes sense to me.

i kinda wish he didn't live so far away. i could see myself dating him if he was local.

i hope tony isn't mad at me i hope his friends don't give him shit. we'll see what happens on wednesday when i hang out with tony for 4th of july. he's a really nice guy. i really like him. i think i'll be fine but i'm a little put out after riding a weird high for 4 days and then coming back to reality. i think i'll see him again in the future, but i shouldn't count on this happening again. i mean, it really might, but it's better to keep expectations short i think.