#also polyam!johnny my beloved <3 <3

[jaymber]

Chippin' In

Timeline 20151 - Protagonist : V Temarii

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Finding the enigmantic "Ebunike" had been an easy task. Dealing with Grayson, an easier one. A single bullet to the head. V didn't think twice, the second his hand connected with the Malorian Arms, he just knew what he had to do. They left the docks for the oil fields in Johnny's Porsche, that had, just like the gun, seemingly called them to it. V could feel Johnny's emotions as if they were his own. The turmoil of excitement and nervousness, like he wanted his host to drive even faster, and the car to stop right now, all at once. Finding his own body was both the closure he needed, and the reminder he was gone, no matter how alive he could feel. V scanned the perimeter of steel, flames of mud, but didn't find anything expect a few shards left behind by the long-gone workers. If Grayson hadn't lied, Johnny's body had either been moved, or sank so low in the bowels of the Earth it had hidden from the world. If the first option crossed Johnny's mind, he soundly, yet eerily, went for the second one. Letting go instead of blindly believing what he wanted to believe. V realized Johnny had changed, or tried to, at least. Burying his old self, again. The merc felt he was talking to Johnny, the real Johnny, for the first time since they met. "Managed one thing for now," the rockerboy eventually admitted, "Not fucked it up, what we have."

But he was, once again, believing what he wanted to believe. "Did you? Johnny, you tricked me. Used me like you did everyone else. It's like you don't even realize you're doing it anymore - pushing everyone away. You fucked it up. Really bad." "Didn't seem like you hated my living guts… until now." It wasn't reproach, it was guilt. It wasn't anger, it was the false idea their relationship couldn't be repaired. V started to wonder if his defensive act wasn't just a way to protect more brittle parts of himself. That, V could relate to. "I don't. Know I should, but… I- I just can't," he reassured, "Would be meeting Hanako by now if that was the case, not still going with your every whim." And maybe Johnny could feel V's emotions as well, his attachment to the engram he didn't want to regret. He sat down and asked: "Is it too late to ask for a second chance?"

"You can't be serious. Johnny, I gave every single gonk in this damned city a second chance. Same goes to you, but- Please, I need you to be honest with me. Don't care what I wanna hear, need to know I can trust you. Hell, I'll give you some leash way if- "Leeway," he corrected. "Uh-huh, that. Just- Don't ruin what we have, just cause you can." "I'll try damned hard." It felt honest. It was all V asked for.

"You got nothing to gain from running from destroying this." This. That something that made their heart beat in a fast, but pleasant pace. That made their eyes look for the other's, and anchored into them. That made their lips crook into smiles, despite everything. This, that unnamed relationship that made V feel like Johnny's hand looked lonely resting on the cold steel. "I know, V. I know."

"I just… don't get you sometimes," V admitted after a peaceful while. "It's okay, V. I was sort of a misunderstood genius, in my time." "Nah, I mean. I saw it, felt it. You liked being back. In control of everything. Could've just ran. Take the pills til I couldn't follow. Yet, here we are. Me - driving. You - on the backseat. Why?" "Eh, you know your way behind the wheel." "Johnny… Honesty. Remember?"

Johnny turned to him, with a quip on the tip of his tongue he swallowed back when he saw the look V had for him, the warmth V had for him. He stopped, and V felt himself take a big gulp of air suddenly. Johnny's eyes fell on his lips, and the same want reached their minds. Yet, Johnny still had to run his mouth. "Fuck, fine. Felt great, yeah. Better than ever. Johnny Silverhand, Rockerboy Legend, back in business! But, the longer I was myself, the more painful that... sharp something near my heart - our heart - got. Only got better when I felt you here, when this stupid wave of relief washed over me."

They kissed, and it already felt so natural. The same ease settled in their minds, the same wave of affection. A single kiss, despite them wanting more. Because they both weren't used to that kind of love. Something simple, and free. Something passionate, yet gentle. Something they truly wanted, instead of pretending to. "Know what you mean," V admitted, "This. Now. World's fucked up. I'm fucked up and you're even worse. And yet… Feels like I finally found a place where I belong when you're around, found a home."

"This can't be good," Johnny said, halfway between amusement and worry. "Dunno, maybe it is. I don't wanna think about it too hard - wanna enjoy the feeling while it lasts." "Same here."

"So, about that second chance… what you'll get me to do this time? Don't ask me to grab a mic, I'd rather go steal an AV and climb that fucking tower myself!" "Nah, your coup at the Orbital Station's enough. It's about Rogue."

"One of the many people you let down. Wanna be friends again?" "Not sure. Maybe I shouldn't insert myself back into her life." "Way too late, Johnny. Backing off now would just be another excuse to ruin your relationship with her." "You're right. Always promised her I would- well-" Johnny was hesitating. His vibrant emotions started to fade, like he was trying to hide them from his host. "Just tell me the truth. All I'm asking." "Promised her a date, long, long ago. Never found the right moment." "Sure, I'll call." "You sure, that'd mean-" "You're trying, Johnny. Can feel it. Can take the body for a ride. Just, be gentle... gentler with it, yeah? No alcohol, drugs, or whatever the-" "No, I mean. Won't that… fuck it up 'tween us?"

A pause. V smiled, than laughed. Giddy at the thought that there indeed was the beginning of a relationship between them now, something Johnny admitted he was scared to loose, but V had felt Johnny's feelings for Alt, and felt his feelings for Rogue's not long after. He knew that that heart he was so closely protecting was bigger than they all thought. "Johnny, I've been around you long enough to know you can handle more than one." "Fuck, V. Maybe you're right."

#johnny silverhand #cyberpunk 2077 #male!v #oc: vaea temarii #rsd!johnny my beloved <3 #also polyam!johnny my beloved <3 <3