#and his quest for investigation and escapism lead to intense trauma but he couldnt just Leave

[eric-the-bmo]

So for my game tonight- Theodore's unconscious right now, but as soon as he wakes up... Imagine this, because this is what the session's opening will be like for him:

You're ripped out of whatever dream-state you were in (was it a nice dream? did you forget everything you've gone through while you were sleeping?). You're on the floor.

You realize your body Hurts. Your nose is broken.

Maybe you'll vaguely realize where you are, or maybe you'll try to remember what happened-

But you're going to get decked with a baseball bat, held by your former friend/party member, who most likely has the intent to kill you. He's knows it's you.

Panic- fight back? Do you fight out of instinct or because you remember what you've caused and decided this is a viable act of karma, so you fight to get him to hit you more?

If you haven't by now, realize the consequences of your actions: Your mentor, who kept you from dropping out and had hope for you, both for the changeling and human world, is gone- possessed- and it's your fault. Your former friend's boyfriend is also gone, you tried to kill another party member's friend (and the party in general), and you've practically kickstarted a war while you were possessed by the BBEG. Your party already lost some trust in you earlier before- all trust is obliterated because of this.

Do you have anything left?

#ended up writing a whole essay in the tags again #im so normal about how horrible his life has become #he just wanted to have some escapism but got caught up into a resistance #and his quest for investigation and escapism lead to intense trauma but he couldnt just Leave #he has to stay and help save the world now #so he's plagued with nightmares and the escapism has become worse that what he originally tried to escape from #but he keeps going #because while both options are Bad at least there's fantasy and wonder here- he cant leave #and so he's offered power by the bbeg and fights against it #but he steals its artifact and tells himself its for research #and then he gets offered power by a villain and declines- he doesnt want that he just wants knowledge #he wants things to think about to distract himself from everything from the fact he's a college failure & from everything he's been through #and then the artifact offers him an escape with the possibility to change things- the Power to do that and make things better for himself #and to maybe release some of the anger buried in his heart #and theodore knows its fake. he Knows. #but he fails to resist just for a moment and now he's lost everything #and what does he have left? #he was failing college anyway and now there's no one in the changeling realm to help him. he's the cause of his own ruin #and so he's going to spiral. #his rage at himself with be extended outwards until he finally and completely destroys himself #theodore absolutely deserves consequences for what he's done #but that doesnt deny the fact i view him as a tragic character #(though i do worry if he comes across as too pathetic and/or whiny at times) #the discovery of the supernatural world made his life worse not only bc of outside factors but also bc of his own actions #Theodore was made to be a tragic character- he was never meant to have a happy ending- and by god is that happening #eric finally speaks #ttrpg oc #theodore carter #rainbow in the dark #ttrpg character