#and to maybe release some of the anger buried in his heart

[eric-the-bmo]

So for my game tonight- Theodore's unconscious right now, but as soon as he wakes up... Imagine this, because this is what the session's opening will be like for him:

You're ripped out of whatever dream-state you were in (was it a nice dream? did you forget everything you've gone through while you were sleeping?). You're on the floor.

You realize your body Hurts. Your nose is broken.

Maybe you'll vaguely realize where you are, or maybe you'll try to remember what happened-

But you're going to get decked with a baseball bat, held by your former friend/party member, who most likely has the intent to kill you. He's knows it's you.

Panic- fight back? Do you fight out of instinct or because you remember what you've caused and decided this is a viable act of karma, so you fight to get him to hit you more?

If you haven't by now, realize the consequences of your actions: Your mentor, who kept you from dropping out and had hope for you, both for the changeling and human world, is gone- possessed- and it's your fault. Your former friend's boyfriend is also gone, you tried to kill another party member's friend (and the party in general), and you've practically kickstarted a war while you were possessed by the BBEG. Your party already lost some trust in you earlier before- all trust is obliterated because of this.

Do you have anything left?

#ended up writing a whole essay in the tags again #im so normal about how horrible his life has become #he just wanted to have some escapism but got caught up into a resistance #and his quest for investigation and escapism lead to intense trauma but he couldnt just Leave #he has to stay and help save the world now #so he's plagued with nightmares and the escapism has become worse that what he originally tried to escape from #but he keeps going #because while both options are Bad at least there's fantasy and wonder here- he cant leave #and so he's offered power by the bbeg and fights against it #but he steals its artifact and tells himself its for research #and then he gets offered power by a villain and declines- he doesnt want that he just wants knowledge #he wants things to think about to distract himself from everything from the fact he's a college failure & from everything he's been through #and then the artifact offers him an escape with the possibility to change things- the Power to do that and make things better for himself #and to maybe release some of the anger buried in his heart #and theodore knows its fake. he Knows. #but he fails to resist just for a moment and now he's lost everything #and what does he have left? #he was failing college anyway and now there's no one in the changeling realm to help him. he's the cause of his own ruin #and so he's going to spiral. #his rage at himself with be extended outwards until he finally and completely destroys himself #theodore absolutely deserves consequences for what he's done #but that doesnt deny the fact i view him as a tragic character #(though i do worry if he comes across as too pathetic and/or whiny at times) #the discovery of the supernatural world made his life worse not only bc of outside factors but also bc of his own actions #Theodore was made to be a tragic character- he was never meant to have a happy ending- and by god is that happening #eric finally speaks #ttrpg oc #theodore carter #rainbow in the dark #ttrpg character

[tempestuous-lush]

The Resolution || Carmy Berzatto x Sunny

the resolution - jack's mannequin

warnings: mentions of suicide, abusive family, anxiety (hinted at), heavy feelings, carmy being an ass at first, carmy with some well directed anger, and fluff.

misc: This is a very personal piece for me. When watching the bear, I absolutely fell in love with the character of Carmy and found similarities in the strangest and most depressing of ways. I put a lot of effort into this and I hope it is enjoyed.

As always, the music influences the story. So I encourage listening. ♡

Also as this is very different for me, let me know what you think? I would greatly appreciate it.

summary: You're a server at the new restaurant, The Bear. One night, your home life catches up to you and clashes with Carmy, who is still dealing with the emotional fallout of how he left things with Claire.

banner courtesy of @firefly-graphics

There was a loud crash and you could feel your heart stuttering. 

Carmy didn’t turn around. 

You watched as his shoulders tightened beneath that chef’s coat as he continued making what he was already on. Sydney’s knuckles tightened around the podium where she was keeping track of orders. You hadn’t realized you were holding your breath until you released it to answer Carmy’s pissed off voice, “The FUCK was that?”

Everything tensed in your body and instead of explaining, you calmly stated, “I need two more seven fishes, chef, on the fly, along with a T bone.”

You felt a panic well up inside of you as you saw Carmy slam his hand down on the counter, open palmed and angry. Quickly, you were going to walk away. After last night you couldn’t handle another person yelling at you. Yet, you  couldn’t walk away.

Fear raced through you.

Instead of fleeing, you stayed rooted to the spot and watched as he spun around and got in your face, those blue eyes boring into you as he raised his hand. Thanks to his anger in the moment, he missed the flinch that escaped you at the gesture, However, Syd didn’t. He didn’t bother making eye contact with you he pointed at the wall and door that was shared with the dining room, “Slow the fuck down on your way out and maybe, just FUCKING maybe, you’d see someone approaching through the god damn glass wall, yeah?”

“It was an a- an...an accident. Chef.”

God, you hated how weak you sounded in this moment. It was all you ever did. Last night, with your dad, you just stood there and took the abuse. As he berated you with his drunken words you silently wept. The only sounds you made were ones where you would apologize and ask for forgiveness.

And Carmy? Yeah, he had a temper but it was never like this. In fact, it stunned you into submission. It reminded you of everything else in your life and god, you were so thankful this uniform hid the bruising on your arm. It would just make you look even weaker.

Carmy flexed his fist and just, “We can’t afford accidents like that. Open your fucking eyes, yeah?”

Everything felt as though it was echoing in your head. 

You could nearly smell the cheap whiskey on your dad’s breath as he continued berating you, “Open your fucking eyes, Princess. Only thing a girl like you is good for is spreading your legs and getting paid for it. Fucking useless. Just like your god damned mother.” Your mother, the one that was buried in the ground. The one who blew her brains out in front of Buckingham Fountain because she couldn’t take her life anymore. The woman who was a saint, until your dad found out she had been seeing someone else. Planning to leave with you. That had turned her into a whore. His fingers wrapped around your arm and tightened until you were crying out from the pain-

Carmy took it too far. He realized that as you mentally left the conversation.

Physically you were there, but he saw the light leave your eyes and the tears begin to replace them. Fuck. He was an idiot. He let this shit that happened with Claire consume him and piss him off to the point where anything broke him. He winced and thought to himself how lame of a fucking excuse that was. However, when he tried to pull you back to the present, his fingers wrapped around your arm in the same place you’d been hurt so recently. Suddenly, you pulled out of whatever hell you were caught in and a scream escaped you as your free hand flew across his face, the sound of the slap echoing through the now silent kitchen as you sobbed, “Don’t fucking touch me!”

You came alive in that moment and everything inside of you felt like it was about to snap if you held in your hurt for any longer than you needed to. Suddenly, you slapped him again and the words spilled out of you as you landed weak fist after weak fist in his chest before pushing him back, “You’re a fucking coward and a bully, and I don’t want anything to do with you. I hate you! You don’t get to touch me!”

Except those words weren’t meant for Carmy and neither were the tears freely flowing down your face. A look of shock mixed with embarrassment washed over your features. Carmy took a step towards you and you backed away. Those blue eyes of his were searing. You saw the way his glance fell to your arm where he had just grabbed before they came back to your eyes.

His eyes held sympathy. Understanding. And a look you hated. Pity.

Slowly, you untied your apron and took the server book out holding cash and dropped it on the ground. Carmy could see the way your legs tensed and he knew, he knew you were about to run. He held his hands up and looked at you softer, “Listen, sunny”- god you hated that nickname -”it’ll be alright, yeah? Just…just go sit down in the office. We can talk about this after work?”

That was when you bolted. You ran straight out the backdoor into the Chicago winter, the chill stinging your lungs and the snow immediately soaking into your shoes. Fuck. Your stuff was inside and you couldn’t bear to go back in there just to get it. So, instead, you took off running and Carmen was left standing in the kitchen, looking at the spot you had just been standing in. Part of him wanted to go after you. Actually, an overwhelming force inside of him wanted to go after you. However, he’d find you after dinner was finished. He turned around and looked at his kitchen and snapped, “We need two more seven fishes and a T bone on the fly, now!”

“Yes, chef!” The entirety of the kitchen answered unanimously, afraid to piss him off anymore.

You didn’t have your phone, or your wallet, or your god damned boots or jacket to deal with all of this fucking snow! You threw your hands up and swung at the nearest thing. Your hand collided with brick and you had a sharp inhale of pain followed by a loud scream, “FUCK!”

Hours passed and Carmy walked outside and lit his cigarette, Sugar already getting your address on file for him. Sydney slipped through the door as he lit it. She cleared her throat from nerves and asked calmly, “Have you tried calling her yet, Carm?”

“Yeah, huh, turns out”- Carmy took a drag and a bit of a bitter laugh escaped him - “sunny is the only damn server that keeps her phone in her fucking locker, in her bag.”

Sydney shook her head, “Fuck. Of course she is.”

“She’s uh…the way she looked at me, or didn’t. Um. I don’t know. S-something else outside of here is, uh, is going on Syd.” Carmy ran his hand over his face and looked at Sydney, who was clearly thinking of something. Carmy felt a sigh escape him before asking, “Why are you looking like that, Syd?”

“Nothing, just, you didn’t see it, Carm. When you raised your hand she flinched. She obviously thought, even if only for a second, that you were gonna”-

“Yeah, I kind of gathered that from the rest of the interaction, Syd.”

Sydney sighed. 

Carmy’s eyes looked up and he focused on her, “What is it, Sydney?”

She stood up and looked around, before blurting out, “Just, you can’t let this shit that happened with Claire keep fucking with you. Especially at work. It’s not fucking fair to anyone. Especially your employees.” Before Carmy could even respond, Sydney was back inside. 

Sugar stuck her head out and offered a slip of paper with your address on it only moments later. Carmy muttered a thanks and tucked it into his jacket pocket before standing up and finishing his cigarette, “Thanks Sug, I’ll uh, let you know how it pans out, yeah?”

Meanwhile, you had no idea what to do. Or where to go. Eventually, you found yourself standing in front of the Buckingham Fountain. It shouldn’t shock you. You always ended up here when you were aimless. You stood exactly where they found her. The ground was so pristine in its fresh snow. The white of it was a stark contrast to the blood that must have flowed, endless. A sob racked your body.

Except you weren’t sad.

You were angry, day in and day out, because she was a coward and left you here. Alone. So alone. A hard shiver chased your sob and you huddled into yourself for warmth. Except warmth didn’t come. 

Carmy knocked on the door of a run down house. He went to knock again when the door opened and Carmy was greeted by a man in his fifties, wearing stained sweatpants and an old cubs shirt. A beer was in his hand. The man looked at Carmy and huffed, “Whatever ya sellin’ man, don’t want it.”

Carmy froze for a second. Was this the one that hurt you? His fist already flexed at the thought. The man went to shut the door and Carmy’s hand held the door open. Carm held up his right hand while nodding. It was as if to silently say give me a second. Those blue eyes peered up at your father and after a moment Carmy asked, “Yeah, I’m looking for someone. Works for me at The Bear?” He dropped your name.

“You talking ‘bout my daughter?”

Carmy looked at this man and tried to find your face in his, and it wasn’t there. You must look like your mom. An exhale escaped Carmy, “Yeah, yeah. She bolted mid shift and I’m trying to figure out if she’s oka”-

“Yeah, she’s a bit of an unreliable bitch. Gets it from her fucking ma’. No fucking drive. Needs a strong hand just to push her in the right direction. And even then, a fucking idiot.”

Carmy’s eyes glazed over with anger as he listened to your dad. It contrasted with everything he knew about you. You were kind and always had a smile. You made friends with everyone. Literally. You’d been one of the last hires for the restaurant, and everyone already adored you. You walked into a room and everyone lit up. Hell, even when he interviewed you, he had to bite back a smile. And it was the day after soft open, when Claire had broken up with the night before and he was a fucking mess.

You didn’t need a strong hand. You didn’t need drive. You were the fucking sun and everyone else was simply pulled along by your gravity. His fist flexed again when he thought of your reaction to his hand on your arm. Your dad’s words played back through his brain. A strong hand. Something in Carmy snapped, “A strong hand, huh? Tell me, uh…that strong hand you talked about, you lay a fucking strong hand on her asshole?”

“Oh fuck you. She’s my damn daughter! What? What…she say I lay a hand on her? Fine then. Yeah. I have a drink, I get relaxed, and she has to go and piss me off with her fucking bullshit so yeah, I fucking put her in her place. Fucking bitch really is just like her mother. She’s lucky I didn’t break her god damned arm last night to prove a fucking point.” Carmy’s knuckles were white as he held the door open. Your dad kept fucking going, “But anyway man you’re letting in the fucking cold and as you can see the useless little bitch isn’t ev”-

You dad never got to say anything else. Carmy’s fist finally flew and landed on his jaw, Carmy’s body weight behind it and knocking your dad onto the ground. The first punch shut him up.

The second? Carmy felt his nose crunch beneath his knuckles. Blood flowed freely.

The third? Well, Carmy was already pissed. His anger at everything? He reached the tipping point with what this piece of shit said about you. That first punch, though?

It also broke the dam that was holding everything in. It felt so good for his anger to unleash. As he looked down at your father’s face, bloody and already swelling, he thought of the look in your eyes as his fingers had wrapped around your arm and Carmy let out a yell as his fist crashed into your father’s face one final time. 

Pushing himself up, Carmy stood and flexed his hands again, the sting already settling into the busted knuckles. He ran a hand through his hair, his curls wild from his exertion. Those large blue eyes closed as Carmy sighed, “Fucking shit. Fuck.”

Your dad let out a groan of pain and Carmy’s eyes shot open, and he looked down at the damage he caused, whispering, “You’re lucky I didn’t break your god damned arm to prove a fucking point, jackass.”

He left and walked down the overgrown path back out to the street and got in the rundown car he drove to head back to the restaurant. Maybe you’d come back. He wasn’t sure. He let out deep breaths. An ache was settling in his chest as the same hurt look on your face kept appearing every time he so much as blinked. His hand immediately began to rub into his chest. Carmy needed you to show up at the restaurant. If you left like that, and he never spoke to you again, he wasn’t sure he could ever ease this sense of guilt settling. 

By the time he pulled up at the restaurant, the lights were all off and the place was closed. A fresh sheet of powdered snow was starting to fall. God, Carmy hoped you were somewhere warm. The guilt increased as he thought about your locker, your bag, boots, and winter coat tucked away inside. He walked down the alley. Instinctively, Carmy pulled a cigarette from his pack with his lips. Putting the pack back in his jacket pocket, he came to a stop. That cigarette fell from his mouth and hit the ground as he spotted a huddled up figure by the back door. He was next to you in a minute and your eyes looked up at him, a shaky laugh coming from you, “It’s, uh….it’s fuckin’ c-cold out here, ch-chef.”

“Fuck”- Carmy’s jacket immediately came off and enveloped you as you sat on the ground, the snow seeping into your pants as it melted. The warmth was welcomed.

He fumbled with his keys to hurry and open the door. As soon as he got it opened, he scooped you up in his arms and hurriedly stepped inside. He walked to the office and dropped you down on the chair in front of Natalie’s desk. You looked so small burrowed into his jacket. Carmy was trying so hard to ignore the blue tinge on your lips. He turned to the thermostat for the office and cranked up the heat, shutting the door with the two of you in there. 

Next, he pulled up the second chair and sat in front of you. He reached beneath the jacket to find your hands. They were freezing. As he began to rub his warm, rough hands over yours you closed your eyes and fought back tears. Embarrassment always made you cry. The two of you stayed like this for a while, until Carmy’s brow was dripping with sweat and the color finally returned to your lips. As he withdrew his hands, you grabbed hold of them. His blue eyes met your own large, doe eyes. A few more moments of silence stretched between you. His thumb stroked the back of your palm where it landed, imploring you to say something as he continued looking at you with that gaze. So, you said the first words that came to your mouth, “I’m s-sorry.”

A huff of air escaped him as he looked at you with the softest hint of a smile, “For what, sunny?”

“The things I said to you, they weren’t”- a sniffle escaped you. Fuck. The embarrassment. Your eyes glossed over with tears as he looked at you and the second you blinked, they spilled over. Your first instinct though wasn’t to pull your hands away to wipe your tears. Instead, you buried your face in the warmth of his coat. A sob racked your body and you Carmy didn’t interrupt. Even if he wanted to, he wasn’t sure what to say. And then finally, muffled by his jacket, you spoke up, “They weren’t intended for you.”

“Yeah”- he shook off the visual of your dad’s bloodied face  -“I kind of figured, sunny. Is there, uh, heh, a reason you aren’t looking up at me though? It’d be easier to understand you without my jacket in the way.”

You just shook your head no into the jacket. Carmy sighed and pulled his hands away. He looked around and used his shirt to wipe his sweat from his face before commenting, “I’m gonna go into the kitchen. If you want to head out there when you’re more comfortable, warmed up…that’d work, yeah?”

After a moment, you nodded into the jacket. 

Carmy walked out and headed to the cooler immediately. The only thing he knew to do, truly, when someone was upset? He pulled out a chicken and fresh vegetables. As he carried them to the counter, he realized how bad his knuckles were. Carmy ran them under the handwashing sink. A wince crossed his face at the initial contact. He quickly cleaned his hands, dried them, and pulled on gloves just to be safe and began prepping food. 

Eventually, you got too warm in the office and stood up, leaving his jacket on the chair and shrugging out of your button up, happy to have less to trap the suddenly overwhelming heat you felt in this office. You were left in your work pants and a thin three quarter sleeve black shirt. Taking a deep breath, you wiped your eyes and headed out. As you did, you saw Carmy poured over the stove and fryer. You cleared your throat, “What’re you up to over there, Chef?”

You didn’t know what to call him. He was still your boss. All things considered though, you felt like Chef might be too formal right now. He must have too. He called out over his shoulder, barely glancing at you, “Carmy.”

“Sorry?”

“You can call me Carmy, yeah sunny?” He pulled something out of the fryer before turning back to the stove. You spotted a stool that he had pulled up to the other side of the plating table. You took a seat and watched him work. He wasn’t in his chef coat. Instead, he was wearing a white t-shirt that was typical of him and his chef pants. You thought of something your mother used to say. When someone loves what they do, you can see it in how they move. It becomes an art. Watching him cook, relaxed like this, it felt like watching an art. 

Looking down at your hands, you wondered to yourself if you’d ever find something like that. There had been times when you thought you had found the thing you’d been meant for but you were always told how much of a waste of time it was, or how you were stupid for thinking you could make something out of ‘shit’.

You blinked furiously, trying to keep the tears from welling over. What pulled you from crying was the sound of a plate being placed before you. It was beautiful, and smelled delicious. Chicken with fried brussel sprouts and some sort of sauce drizzled over the meat. Carmy looked on as you took a tentative bite, you unsure of why he was being so kind to you. As you closed your mouth around the food you let out a whimper. The hot food chased a shiver from your spine you didn’t know was trapped there and you muttered with a full mouth, “Fuck me.”

Carmy let out a breath and followed by a soft laugh, “Yeah, so it’s good?”

“Oh don’t do that. You know it is.” A smile graced your face, eyes crinkled in the corners as you cut another bite. There it was. Carmy missed that smile for the brief time it was gone. His smile faded as he felt his breath catch in his throat looking at you. 

He watched you take another bite and cleared his throat, “What’s the best thing you’ve ever eaten?”

After you finished your bite you paused, “Are you sure? I don’t want to insult a Michelin star retaining chef.”

Carmy worked through keeping the smile from his lips. You’d heard him and Sydney going back and forth yet again over it just to retort with it. He kept quiet though. Instead, he gave you a little nod as if to say proceed. You put your knife and fork down and with a shy smile, you answered, “The wolf burger from Bad Wolf Tavern.”

“Well damn I gotta say”- he held back a laugh but his smile was contagious  -“I wasn’t expecting that.”

“Mhm”, you took another bite of what he prepared for you. Holy fuck it was so good. But you were going to stand by your guns, and mouth full, “This is wonderful chef, but”-

“Carmy.” His eyes stared at you as he corrected you. 

You swallowed your bite, “Carmy, but there’s nothing more comforting than beef, cheese and bread on a bun with salty fried potatoes and I will stand by that. And food should be that. Comfort.”

He rapped his knuckles on the counter as he spoke up again, “Couldn’t agree more, sunny. It’s why I made you that. It’s my mom’s old chicken recipe. She used to make it on especially cold days when we were kids. Warm us up. Figured you could use a little bit of that. Minus the haggis. Figured you might rather brussels.”

A heated blush settled on your cheeks as you tried to maintain your line of sight with him. 

However, you looked down after a few moments, muttering your thank you. He’d made you something his mother would make him. You thought of your own mother buried beneath the frozen ground. Your eyes were watering as you took another bite. Carmy, not knowing the truth, couldn’t stop thinking about your mother. If you were receiving this treatment, was she okay? He asked, uncertain, “Your mom, is she…is she okay?”

“As great as you can be buried underground. She put a bullet in her head in front of Buckingham Fountain about twelve years ago, so. Yeah.” Carmy closed his eyes in disbelief as you took another bite to try and finish a suddenly uncomfortable meal. 

Fucking hell. He ran his hand over his face and then through his wild curls. Feeling like nothing he could say would help, he left you to eat in silence as he cleaned up the evidence he left behind in the kitchen. By the time he was done you were carrying your plate to the dish pit. Carmy silently took everything from your hands and washed them quickly before heading to the office to bump the thermostat back down so Sug wouldn’t have a fit. When he came out, you were bundled up in the appropriate clothes and you smiled at him. He felt his heart stutter at the sight, and he quickly looked away. 

His fingers ran through his mess of hair again. You didn’t know him well enough to know that it was a nervous habit. A blush spread on your face at the sight, though. Carmy looked back up at you and saw the blush, putting it on the fact that you were warm and bundled. The warmth was flushing your skin.

Carmy stuttered to get out the words, “Wh-where, um…w-where are you uh, where are you gonna be going tonight?”

“I gotta go home, Carmy. I’ll be fine. Promise.” The promise sounded weak on your lips. In all honesty, you weren’t sure. But your dad was your only family left. You couldn’t just leave him. Could you?

Meanwhile, Carmy thought of how he left your dad. The idea of you going back over there…it couldn’t go well. His heart started pounding more and more. His hand reached up to rub over his heart until the noise faded. He looked at you. The way you looked at him across the room with concern, like you weren’t the one who needed to be taken care of in this scenario. His breathing leveled out as his thoughts circled around the same solution, over and over, until he finally mentioned, “You could, um, you could stay with”- his eyes met yours, grounding him -“you could stay with me.”

Your emotions immediately began conflicting as his words registered, your teeth finding your thumb nail as you looked at him, “Carmy, I couldn’t.”

“No, you could. I- I promise. It wouldn’t be a problem.”

“Carmy, I’d be intruding.” 

Those blue eyes leveled with your gaze, and he said in an absolute, “Not to me.”

You pulled your bag over your shoulder and shook your head, “I can’t, Carmy. I gotta go home. My dad, he’s the only family I have left and…I know, he doesn’t mean it. He doesn’t. He- he couldn’t. I gotta get going. Thank you, for the meal, and for uh, warming me back up.” His eyes tracked you as you walked to the door, “So, do I still have a job to come to, tomorrow?”

Carmy’s head was spinning, thinking of ways to keep you from leaving, from going back home. He couldn’t think of a single damn one though. Except that he didn’t want to let you go. But that was too much to say. His eyes fluttered shut as he tried to chase away images of Claire. Everything was conflicting. He flexed his hand, the sting of his broken skin waking him back up to the present, “Yes, sunny, y-you still have a job tomorrow. But, be safe, yeah?”

“Of course, Carmy.” You opened the door and breathed in the cold air, hesitant to take a step until finally you looked over your shoulder at him, “See you at 3:30, chef.”

Carmy couldn’t sleep, tossing and turning and waking up soaked with sweat. All of his usual mental energy was devoted to you. Part of him wondered if he should go there to check on you. Instead, he texted. It was a brief comfort when you texted back.

I am good. Get some sleep. 

He’d managed to get a few hours of sleep before he showed up at The Bear the next morning. Sydney had told him again that they needed to go over a few things. Ever since he’d promised her that he’d be there for her as partners in this, he couldn’t afford to let her down. The first thing she’d asked though was the one thing he’d been wondering, “Hey! Sunny alright?”

“Yeah, yeah. She said she’d be here at, um, at 3:30.”

Sydney smiled before nodding, “Yeah? Good. Well, come on. Been figuring out ways that I think we can improve efficiency in the kitchen. I think you might like some of my ideas.”

Carmy was prepping food to try and give his mind focus after he and Syd were done. He needed 3:30 to get here, needed to see you. As he broke down the chicken, his mind circled back around to last night. A small smile appeared on his face as he remembered you saying what your favorite meal was. His thoughts were circling again.

He looked up at the clock. 3:24. The rest of the servers for dinner service flowed in, talking and laughing, headed to the lockers to get ready. But not you. 

His hands grew shaky, so he placed the knife down. Carmy washed his hands, scrubbing them clean, before drying them and looking back up at the clock. 3:27. 

He paced back and forth, his eyes constantly glancing up at the clock. His fingers ran through his hair, hand rubbing over his chest. Reaching for his back pocket, Carmy felt his pack of cigarettes and headed outside to smoke to take his mind off the time. One last glance before he walked out the door and he wished he hadn’t. 3:33. 

He squatted by the back door and lit a cigarette before pulling out his phone and texting you again. You still coming in for 3:30 Sunny? Cause I hate to say it. You’re late.

He took a drag of his cigarette as he waited to see a reply. Carmy burned through the entire thing. 3:48. He put out his butt in the snow and stood up. After a few seconds of worry coursed through him, Carmy opened up the door and called out for Sydney. She came from around the corner and he asked, “Do you think you can handle the first leg of service, chef?”

Sydney looked to make sure the rest of the kitchen staff was there before turning to him, “Yeah, absolutely. Think you can be back by around 8? That’s when it gets busy.”

“I’ll be back before 8:00.”

And that’s how he ended up here, once again. Steeling himself, Carmy banged on the front door and called out your name. There wasn’t an answer. Again he called out. And again, no answer. He was about to try calling you again when he heard your voice come from the other side of the door, “Carmy, please leave. I don’t want you here when he comes back. It’ll just make it ugly.”

He placed his palms on the door, leaning his weight against it, not knowing you were doing the same thing on the other side, though your head was hanging low in defeat and shame. Your fingers found their way to your mouth, nails already chewed until your fingers were bleeding. You thought of the way he looked at you last night. How he wanted you to go to his place, sleep there for the night. God, you’d been so stupid.

Carmy huffed and shook his head, “Yeah, I uh, I can’t do that, sunny. Not till I see you. You know? Something feels wrong. Not right. Please? Open up?”

You weighed your options, not that there were many, and took a deep breath before opening the door. You smiled despite your appearance in a feeble attempt to placate Carmy. The smile looked incredibly out of place though and when Camry’s blue eyes landed on you his breath caught before his hands took a delicate hold on your face, “Holy shit. Are- are you okay? That’s a stupid question.”

“Carmy I- I’m fine.” But you weren’t. And the way he was holding your face, so gentle and so kind, it had you about to break. You blinked furiously in an attempt to hold the tears at bay. You looked anywhere but at him. The look on his face was a mix of worry and anger, but not anger at you. You weren’t okay. You weren’t fine. None of this was right. 

Meanwhile, Carmy busied himself with running his fingertips softly along the bruise forming on your jaw, willing it to disappear even though he knew it didn’t work like that. Not to mention the split lip you had that was angry, purple, and swollen. Or the way the bridge of your nose fell way to two black eyes. He finally managed to clear his throat of any emotion before he softly spoke, “Go get a change of clothes. I’m getting you out of here. Now, sunny. Yeah?”

Eventually you nodded and Carmy’s caught breath released as he watched you disappear inside. He lit another cigarette as he kept looking over his shoulder for the asshole known as your dad to pull in and make a scene. But you were quick and soon you were back at the door, bundled into that coat with a bag over your shoulder. Instinctively, his arm wrapped around your shoulders as he led you to the car and you felt yourself relax beneath his touch. 

He opened the door for you and you clumsily climbed in, the car smelling of cigarette and him. 

You felt yourself breathe out, body shuddering slightly as Carmy climbed in the driver’s side and started the vehicle. Your eyes fell on the house you lived in all your life as he pulled away from the curb. In that moment, all you could think to say was a weak “thank you”. 

Carmy kept his eyes on the road. He wanted to get you to his place. Let you take a shower, get you settled in, order you some food and head back to work. That was when he thought of something. He pulled out his phone and dialed Sugar’s cell. She answered with a smile he could hear, “Hey, bear.”

“Hey, sug. Listen, I’ll be over there in just a bit but”- he spared a glance at you -“if someone comes around looking for sunny, just, um, t-tell him that she doesn’t work there anymore and that you haven’t seen her since last night when she walked out, yeah? And if he hangs around past that, call the cops, yeah? Everything’s fine, just, covering bases ya know?”

Even though he said that last part to Sugar, you knew those words were meant for you. You burrowed more into your coat and pulled your legs up to your chest. You hated that this was all because of you. It made you feel like such a bother. As Carmy hung up the phone, you spoke up, “Just bring me to a motel, Carmy. I can just…disappear.”

“No.” His eyes were still steady on the road. When you didn’t say anything, he realized he should elaborate, “It’s my fault, that you’re all marked up. Th-that he hurt you. I’ma take real good care of you, and then when you feel better I will take you wherever you wanna go.”

You worked your thumbnail with your teeth, and when you couldn’t get anything, you began picking at your cuticles. You huffed, before nodding softly to yourself, “I’m not used to, you know, people caring. It, um”- you laughed slightly -“feels good.” Your voice cracked and from his view, Carmy saw you wiping at your face. To try and give you a bit of privacy, he leaned over and turned up the radio, music playing and he readjusted to keep you in the corner of his eye, but not in easy view.

He pulled up and parked outside of an older apartment building. Looking over, he huffed when he realized you fell asleep. Your features were soft and he took a moment to examine the damage. He ran his fingers through his hair and flexed his hands into fists as he noticed the purple feathering around your neck and the same purple ringing around your right eye. And fuck, you looked so peaceful, he was scared to wake you up. Considering his options, he opted to get out of the car and walk around. 

As he reached across you to unbuckle your seatbelt, he caught the smell of you. Floral and warm, spices he couldn’t figure out. His eyes fluttered shut as he lost himself momentarily in it before scooping you up and holding you to his chest. 

You stirred for just a moment before settling against him and Carmy felt a piece of his heart stutter at the sight. When he got inside, he walked towards his bedroom and put you down on his bed before pulling the covers up and over you. Your eyes fluttered open and before you could protest, “Nah, go back to sleep. You need it, and you’ll be safe here.”

Even as you decided to settle under the blankets and adjust, you smiled weakly and nodded into the pillow as your eyes closed again. Carmy reached out for you and brushed your hair back before he could stop himself. You barely registered him saying, “Gonna go back to work. It’s a Friday, so it’ll be a late night. But there’s some food in the fridge.”

On his way out of the bedroom, Carmy stopped to look back at you. A shy smile crept on his face as you pulled blankets to your chest and snuggled them. He ran a hand through his hair before walking out and making sure to lock the door as he left the apartment. He looked at his phone. Sydney would be happy. He was gonna be back for 6:00. 

By the time you woke up, it was right after 10. You pushed back the covers and looked around, realizing after a moment your bag was at the foot of the bed. Carmy must have brought it in before he left. Opening the bag, you pulled out your phone and checked it. You had 14 missed calls, 9 voicemails, and 32 text messages you didn’t want to open. Instead your attention turned to your stomach letting out a loud sound of protest. You hadn’t eaten since last night when Carmy had cooked for you. 

“There’s some food in the fridge.”

His words came back to you, as did the way he brushed your hair from your face, a deep blush creeping onto your face. 

Shaking it off, you threw your phone down on the bed and headed towards the small kitchen to open the fridge and see what food there was. You spotted some ground meat, some vegetables, chicken, and a few other things. Including lamb. All needing to be cooked. It didn’t bother you though. 

Your eyes looked at the clock. 10:28. He’d be leaving in maybe an hour or so. You grabbed the lamb and began to work, raiding his spice cabinet as you went. 

Meanwhile, at The Bear, Carmy looked at the clock. 10:28. They were closing in two minutes. Dining room was still packed. He would be here for a while. He was itching to be home though. He’d called twice. You hadn’t answered. Maybe you were still asleep? 

His fingers gripped the stainless steel prep table as he called out, “Cousin?”

Richie appeared very fast, “Yeah, Carm?”

“I need you to go to the Bad Wolf Tavern and pick up a Wolf burger, yeah.” He thought about how you described their fries, “And an extra order of fries, okay?”

Richie nodded slowly before speaking up, “Is this for sunny? Is she at your place right now?”

Carmy swore under his breath. He’d managed to dodge questions about you all night. And then the rush came and it got dropped. Running his hand over mouth, he exhaled before looking at Richie, “Yeah, cousin. Some bad shit at her place with her dad. Got her out. Wanting to get her some food. Is that alright with you?”

Richie stared at him, scrutinizing. They were still a bit rocky after what happened with Claire and their fallout after. Carmy stared back with a tired expression before Richie nodded, “Yeah, yeah that’s fine. Helping her out was uh, it was a good call. I’ll be back in a bit.”

“Hey”- Carmy called out as Richie turned to leave. Richie looked back at home and Carmy just - “keep this between us, yeah cousin? It’s not your life to talk about.”

“I wouldn’t do that to sunny, cousin. Now, I will be right back. Unless there’s something else?” Richie looked at Carmy with frustration. Carmy hated this feeling between the two of them. He rubbed at his chest. 

Richie turned to leave and Carmy snapped his head up, “I’m sorry, Richie.” Richie stopped and listened as Carmy struggled with the words, “I was…I was upset. And- and an ass. I said things I…I didn’t mean. And god”- Carmy’s laughter sounded strained as he thought of what to say -“I actually hate that you barely say three words to me in a night unless I drag it out of you.”

“Yeah”- Richie looked incredibly serious as he leveled his gaze with Carmy -“you are absolutely an ass, cousin.”

Richie let out a laugh as Carmy bit back a smile. 

Carmy chucked the rag on the table at Richie, “You were waiting for me to say that shit weren’t you, cousin?”

“Absofuckinglutely asshole.” The two of them shared a laugh before Richie slipped out the back and went to get your food for Carmy to bring home. 

By the time he got back, and the kitchen was clean and the building was empty save for Syd and Richie, Carmy glanced at the time. 11:42. It wasn’t so late. He picked up your to-go order and left, driving home and heading up the stairs. He got to his door and saw the glow of light from underneath. Carmy slipped his key in the lock when he heard a clatter of dishes against dishes. He turned the key and opened the door and stepping into his small space, he caught sight of you. 

Your hair was pulled back, the ponytail falling to your lower back. Carmy’s breath caught as he saw the signs of bruising on your exposed neck, another bruise on your arm where he grabbed yesterday. That was when he realized you were wearing a loose and faded black t-shirt. He couldn’t see the front to know that it was a led zeppelin shirt. Suddenly, as his eyes traveled, he couldn’t will himself to simply swallow his spit. You were wearing a pair of his pants. Grey flannel pants. You must have gotten cold and didn’t want to put the heater too high. Or at least, that’s what Carmy told himself. A soft smile appeared on his face though as he spotted the way his pants bunched up around your feet because of the height difference. 

That was when he realized how good it smelled. What were you making? He cleared his throat and wanted to immediately apologize when you nearly jumped out of your skin finally hearing him over the music. However, a laugh erupted and you turned down the music, “Sorry, I saw the radio and figured I’d listen while I worked on the food.”

Carmy couldn’t help but smile at you. It was soft, but the way he looked at you made your smile stay on your face, “I made you some food. Figured you’d do the usual of eating nothing before you leave and everything you had really had to be cooked. And I don’t mind. It’s uh...lamb barbacoa, something my mom used to make for special things. Made some tortillas. Did some peppers and uh”-

-”wait, um, you cooked lamb? And uh, made tortillas?” Carmy looked at you with confusion. Where the hell did you learn that? Your mom? Even though she'd been gone for so long. He felt that ache in his chest dissipate as the meaning of the gesture washed over him. He had made something of his mothers for you, and you were returning the gesture. Fuck.

His eyes lowered to those gray flannel pants. The way your hips softly flared out kept catching his attention. 

You were about to answer him when suddenly you realized he was looking at your clothes you were wearing. Shit. You shuffled, “Sorry, I uh, your apartment insulation is shit. And I got cold. The clothes I packed weren’t really enough.”

“No, it’s uh, it’s fine, sunny.” That was when he remembered he had food for you in hand as well. A huff and, “I didn’t know you’d be doing all of this. I got you a wolf burger with extra f”-

“Well fucking hell the barbacoa is all you.” You moved so fast towards him, it took him off guard when you slammed into him with a hug and your scent engulfed him. He felt a moment of quiet as you rubbed your hand on his back before pulling away and taking the bag from him. Even on your way to his small couch you had already managed to get fries out and shoved a handful into your mouth. You let out a groan of appreciation as you opened up your togo box immediately after sitting and saw the burger. 

Meanwhile, in his kitchen, Carmy eyed the barbacoa. It looked as good as it smelled. He took a small bite and muttered to himself, “Jesus fuck that’s fire.”

You were having more or less the same reaction after your first bite. 

Carmy sat next to you, your legs pressed together. On his plate were two tortillas loaded with barbacoa and peppers. He picked it up and took a bite. A groan escaped him. You smiled, “Is it good?”

You took another bite waiting for your answer and as Carmy swallowed his bite, he was quick to admit, “I’m starting to think I hired you for the wrong job, sunny. Sure you don’t want to work in the back?”

The two of you passed the time like that, speaking to each other in between bites until you were done. It was easy to talk to him. You were a bit surprised. He was always so intense in the kitchen. And Carmy? Carmy wasn’t the least bit surprised how easy you were to talk to. Of course you were. You were the same bright spot you normally were soon enough. It was like the shit with your dad didn’t happen. But he knew it did. Just like you did. And eventually, you stood to throw away your trash but Carmy stood and took it from you, “I got it, sunny. Relax.”

You nodded, before headed to his bedroom to finally face the thing you’d been dreading. You picked up your phone from his bed and unlocked it, the text messages flooding through. You didn’t bother going through the earlier ones. The last one let you know exactly where you stood with your dad. You scanned over the words continuously. You ungrateful fucking bitch. Think you can just leave? If you ever show up back at this house you’ll know just how much I can make your life a living hell. Won’t fucking see the light of day. Maybe join your fucking mother where you belong.

What you didn’t hear or see was Carmy coming to stand in front of you. That meant you couldn’t register the look of concern on his face as he studied you. Your shoulders tense, your breathing shallow, eyes wide and fixated, your teeth working on your thumbnail that was currently bleeding as you held the phone with your other hand.

Carmy wrapped his hand around your wrist and at his touch you relaxed, and he guided your thumb from your mouth. With his other hand he took your phone and left, walking into the kitchen with your trailing behind him. He looked over the text message that you were fixated on, committing the number to memory before dropping your phone into the half full sink. 

He looked over his shoulder at you, “Looks like you need a new one. T’me it looks like you could even look into a new number, yeah?”

You looked down at the ground to try and hide your sudden smile. God he wished you wouldn’t hide it from him. His blue eyes roamed over you and when you looked up at him, that smile still on your face, a sudden surge of happiness from making you smile pulled at the corners of his lips. 

In the midst of your comfortable silence with Carmy, a yawn escaped you and you sheepishly covered your face, peeking out at him from behind a crack in your fingers. Carmy laughed and, “Alright, let’s get you back into the bed huh? Don’t worry, I’ll sleep on the couch.”

He followed behind you for some inexplicable reason. Maybe a part of him liked the way you looked burrowed into his bed? Maybe he wanted to see you safely asleep? He wasn’t sure. But when you crawled into his bed and pulled the covers up over yourself, a pang shot through him at the memory of Claire doing the same. Still so recent. He shook his head as if to clear his thoughts. Then, with a small smile, he rubbed at his chest for a brief moment before reaching over you to grab his spare pillow.

As he did you smelled that distinct smell he had, the one that comforted you earlier. Without thinking, you whispered so faint he barely heard it, “Will you stay here? With…with me?”

Carmy could feel something inside of him breaking at how small you seemed, how scared. He found himself nodding slowly, “Yeah, yeah sunny. I’ma just, uh, take a shower and make sure it’s all locked up. Is that alright?”

You let out a yawn before nodding into the pillow and resettling. Carmy moved fast and your eyes were growing heavier by the time he walked back in, his curls damp and a smile formed on your face as you deliriously thought of how that would dry in his sleep. You felt the bed dip as he climbed over you. His weight against you, if only briefly, made you flush slightly. He lay there staring at the ceiling, occasionally glancing at you, until your voice drifted to him, “Good night, Carm…and thank you.”

“Night, sunny, see ya in the morning, yeah?”

Carmy continued staring at the ceiling until he heard the sound of your gentle, deep breathing. A few moments later everything in him froze as you rolled over and burrowed into his side, your arm falling across him. A breath shuddered from him and when he inhaled, it was all you, the warmth of the room amplifying that scent that already seemed so familiar and comfortable to him. His arm wrapped around you and pulled you closer. His hand played with your hair splayed out. His breathing slowed to match yours until finally, he also drifted into sleep. 

And for the first time in a long time, not even occurring with Claire, his dreams weren’t haunted with visions of his past, nor anxiety about his future. And everything? Everything was tinged with the scent of delicate florals and warm spices.

Everything, as he slept, was slowly taken over by you.

#carmy berzatto #carmy x reader #carmy x you #carmy x sunny #carmy berzatto fic #carmy berzatto fluff #carmen berzatto x reader #the bear fic

[apollodeath]

Are You in the Mood?

Notes/summary: inspired from my headcannons! I wanted to make a smutty story that was König being turned on but you’re busy with working from home and he kinda just waits around your home for you to be ready.

Warnings: rough sexual activity, talks of vagina anatomy. ¿Primal/animal/prey talk?, unprotected sex, consent isn’t a warning but thought I’d add it in here cause it’s sexy. MDNI 18+ ONLY

König x reader

Reader reference as only ‘you’ and pet names.

~

König’s day has been bad since he woke up, stressful situations from work got him feeling a little pent up. Anger sat within him today. He didn’t ever release it by stomping around the house or even yelling at others. He kinda just felt it in him deep and angry it stayed, he got home to you late due to work keeping him which meant he missed lunch with you but, you left him a sandwich.

He ate it about an hour ago and sat in the living room after. You worked from home and that’s what you’ve been doing ever since. Around 3pm his body told him something he wasn’t expecting, it wanted release. But not any release, it wanted to be deeply buried in a sopping wet pussy as he unloaded every worry. His body chilled over from the idea. He then proceeded to get up and wonder down the hall catching you in his eyes.

Sat with your back to the door typing away at your desk. König watches from the doorway leaning against the frame.

“Are you almost done?” He asks softly and gentle.

“Umm…” you continue. Getting lost in your work for a second “yes but no…” you have so much on your mind and so much more to do.

König nods in understanding. König thinks for a second and goes to open his mouth but, feels embarrassment tingle in his body. He paused for a second longer and then turns back going to the living room sitting. He feels the familiar ache below the belt that his cock wants your attention not his own.

He tries watching tv but, it isn’t enough to distract his flying thoughts and desire. He mutes the tv and listens to you or tries to, all he hears is more typing and clicking. König’s hands move over his lap feeling his cock semi hard. He leans his head back to lay it on the couch sighing. His mind wonders to what heated things he’d like to do to you now.

Maybe lay you down on the bed nice and slow, softly kissing then moving down your body to eat you out.

Maybe even right here, on the couch, on his lap bouncing on him.

He swallows hard as his pants get uncomfortably tight and his heart rate speeds slightly.

Maybe he’ll walk in the computer room pick you up out of your chair and strip you down and fuck you against the desk or wall maybe finish on the ground; rug burn on his knees and you on all fours in front of him, dripping and begging for more cum to fill your hol-

You growling in frustration in the computer room disturbs his fantasies. Making him jump up, hard under his pants, practically dripping himself. He walks back down the hall standing more frustrated then before he looms over and brings a dark desire feeling as he stands watching you. He feels like an animal.

“Maus… are you almost done with work?” He says a little less gentle but trying to keep it unnoticed.

“No. I just got an email that this paper is due by the end of the day Köni~” you answer feeling defeated from stress.

He closes eyes trying to stop the feeling of his primal instinct to cum. He replaces his emergency for release to sympathy.

“I’m sorry meine Maus” he says softly. “I-….” He stops and thinks you need less stress so he’ll keep it to himself on how he feels. You turn around in your chair looking at him.

“You?…” you question why he paused his sentence.

“I..I’m sorry you have to do so much work.” König says genuinely not just because he’s hard and bothered, but because he actually is sorry about the stress your work puts you under. He knows what it feels like.

“Thank you Köni, I just-“ sighs “I’ll just try and finish it fast I know you had a hard time at work and probably want some cuddles on the couch.” Your computer pings and you turn around sighing “I promise König I’ll cuddle you” you start typing once more.

König heart melts for your sweet words and his cock twitches for your touch no matter what touch just yours. This makes König feel a little guilty that he wants to release his emotions by cuming and not cuddles or not ONLY cuddles.

He walks back to the living room to uncomfortable to sit so he walks around, pacing behind the couch then entering the kitchen then back out he finally feels his cock softening in his pants which makes him feel relief of uncomfortableness but more frustrated then before. He thinks of work while walking into your shared bedroom, down the hall, past the computer room.

König sits on the bed and sighs throwing his body back to lay on the bed. He is so tall that his feet are flat on the floor while he’s laying down he crosses his arms behind his head closing his eyes. He thinks of today and how angry it made him that someone below his rank decided to yell at him. They knew he wouldn’t yell back but, the disrespect was something König wouldn’t take so easily.

His muscles felt tight his mood was dampened. He just wanted this feeling gone. He opened his eyes thinking if he could just masturbate and be done with this. He unbuckled, unzipped and pulled his cock out over the pants it was still a little tiny bit hard but it didn’t take long for it to spring up again and stand to attention when König let his thoughts take over.

Throwing you on the bed pushing your chest and face into the sheets while plunging his cock in deeper in your wet pussy. Over and over. He thinks about the sounds and feelings while stroking himself to an imaginary pace of his fantasy. He whimpers a little more each time his hand slides over his tip. His eyes roll back for a little when it starts building his orgasm. His legs push off the floor a little while his hips thrust up into his hand.

“König?” You call from down the hall.

“F-fuck…” he pauses his hand and lets his hips fall back down he takes a minute to calm down. Feeling the Orgasm slip away and his breath heave in his chest.

“Köni?!” You call out louder.

“Y-yes? Yes meine Maus?” He calls back, sitting up and re-adjusting his clothes letting his hard cock be placed back under his clothes sealed under zipper and belt once more.

“Can you get me a cup of water really quick I’m almost done!” You say excitedly to be almost finished.

“Yes. I will.” His anger and frustration make him less thrilled. He walks out of the room past you and into the kitchen grabbing a cup and filling it. König’s cock twitches making him spill a little water as his lower body aches and his balls ache for release. He takes a deep breath and starts walking back. He enters the room and towers over you staring at the back of your head as you work.

You notice his presence and it’s a bit different than just sad but, you carry on. You’re on your last page of paper work.

He reaches passed you setting the cup down on your desk. König smells your hair from where he stands and his cock twitches once more making him clear his throat to hide an obvious groan. You look up at him and he looks down at you locking eyes with him you notice he is angry. You furrow your eyebrows just noticing.

“Köni are you okay?” You ask gently. How did you not notice. If you had noticed you would’ve asked more questions about today but, you thought you knew why he was sad. Was he angry because he missed lunch but, why angry? Was he angry with you?

“Yes, Maus.” He answered firmly. He backed away and stood for a second holding your gaze. You look at his stance and realize he’s holding back something.

“König I ate because I wanted to try and be done with work before you got home. So that I could hold you.” You explain. “I didn’t mean to make you upset.” You say with a frown. This making König’s body stop for a second and he leans in kissing your forehead then cheek, kneeling to look at you. König tried hard to never upset you because you have never upset him. He didn’t want to bring his anger home and never did he want to make it feel like it was your doing.

“No, no my love I am… I am not angry with you.” He says brushing your hair back “I-….” He pauses looking down for a second thinking. “I am just… needing-um….” He’s to embarrass to say but he knows he must.

You look with caring eyes and half smile feeling relief it isn’t you that made him angry. “I know what you need” you state softly.

“Oh thank god, miene Maus I-“ you cut him off by hugging him you hold him tight rubbing his back. His cock twitches and aches.

“I’ll cuddle you more soon I just have a few sentences left and I’ll be out there to hold you and kiss you” the last words ‘kiss you’ makes his heart pound. “Is that okay?” You ask feeling him tighten, his body almost to rough with the hug.

“No-yes yes but, I just need… I need to”

“You can tell me, my Love” you say gentle still hugging him still rubbing his back.

“I need to cum.” His accent dripped over the words and down your spine like melted metal. His mood and body made sense immediately. He is angry but it’s covered head to toe in frustration. You slowly back away from the hug looking at him, his eyes say it all; blown out in desire, his body temperature is hot. He looks over your body like an animal ready to devour you leaving nothing but the blood behind, bones and all. You feel yourself begin to get turned on your sure the waiting will lead to seat wetting.

He furrows his brow waiting for a response thinking he might’ve gone to far maybe said to much.

“König I’ll make you cum. As much as you want. As fast as you want. Just let me finish this last sheet and I’ll let you do whatever you want.” you spoke clear and sexually making sure to keep eye contact. You knew he loved that.

“Yes. Maus.” He answered his voice low. König started to feel like an animal waiting for his prey to lower their guard and then he’ll strike. He got up from his knee allowing you to catch a glimpse of his hard cock under his pants.

The outline prominent and you turned in your seat typing out more quickly not caring about minor errors. König walked out back to the room stripping his pants off then his shirt leaving him down to just socks, underwear and mask. He sat down on his side of the bed laying his back against the the headboard trying to keep himself from cuming by himself.

You felt yourself get wet slowly as your mind went from work to König buried in you, body chills and legs start to shake with anticipation for it.

König stiffens his jaw out of frustration and agony at this point. He looks down and his cock is leaking precum onto his underwear. He slowly moves his hand over to it to softly rub his finger over the tip of his penis; that’s still under the fabric. Even tho it’s a soft, barely-anything touch, it earns a soft whimper.

You get done and hit send then almost sprinting out of your office down the hall seeing König sitting on the bed his fingers softly tracing his cock head. You strip rather fast causing König to strip his underwear throwing them to the side. You get up on the bed crawling over to him feeling like the animal this time. You lock lips instantly and feel his rough hands grab your hips pulling you on top of him his cock sat straight up with a little bit of a curve facing his chest. You place your hands on his shoulders to steady yourself.

In-between kisses you hear his soft whimpers and oh, how that made your body heat and your folds leak. König wasted no time placing his hand below you grabbing his cock and placing it at your opening and his left hand lowing you by your hips. He normally would wait an hour of foreplay to make sure you were ready to take him but, your pussy instantly felt like it was a magnet pulling König’s hard aching cock into it. He moaned rather fast pushing you all the way down his thick cock he bit his lip shutting his eyes tight. You felt the familiar burn of him stretching you out but paired with unimaginable pleasure making you moan along with him.

“Fuck!” He practically shouted. His eagerness and neediness made you wonder how long he waited for this. He pushed you up and down with his hands on your sides fucking you pretty hard. You were on top but he was doing all the work. He was pulling your hips up to his tip and pushing you back down rocking his hips to met yours over and over you felt a stretch every time he went fully in but it only made you wetter. Your hands grip his shoulders needing more stability but couldn’t without maybe hurting him so instead you wrap your arms around his neck placing your head in the crook of his neck breathing and softly moaning not to cover up his sweet moans.

König thrusted more frantically, chasing his orgasm but he needed more grip, more action. He wrapped his arms around your waist pushing himself all the way in you holding it there as he got up carrying you to the edge of the bed. You could feel his cock twitching like crazy in your walls. You moan right along with him “what’re you doing?” You say as he walks around the bed.

“Fucking you harder.” He says angrily almost like he’s yelling at you. He doenst let you go but, he lays you on the bed; arms still wrapped around your waist tight as he starts thrusting harder, the sound of your bodies colliding feels the room it’s louder then you think you’ve heard before the vibrations in your body from his cock connecting to your pussy over and over drives you mad.

He’s a whimpering, moaning mess cuss words seep out of his mouth in English and in German. He is working up a sweat in both of you, he turns his face and bits at your neck surely bruising your skin. König feels his orgasm building once again and his eyes shut tight as he hold your skin in his mouth sucking and biting. His thrusts or primal and his bodies curled about yours delivering everything he has. He lets go of your neck and used his mouth to kiss over the tender skin whimpering. “I’m s-sorry.” He moans thinking he’s hurt your neck.

You moan in response feeling so good you can’t respond with words just sloppy call outs of his name. König has always asked to finish inside you while he was going raw inside you but you always denied his request, which he respected always. Because he didn’t ask before starting he knew he had to pull out no matter how bad he wanted to feel the toe curling orgasm rip through him into you filling you up until he was ready to remove himself.

König moans your name then lifts himself up with his arms still thrusting deeply in you he slowly stands and starts getting sloppy which you know that means he’s close to cumming.

“König- Köni~ you can… cum. Cum for me.” You moan out knowing he loves permission and encouragement on cumming. He nods whimpering breathlessly just knowing his legs will be weak once he’s done with you.

“I’m gonna pull out don’t worry” he kept going feeling himself get near the edge “Maus I- I’m so close I’m going to give you all of my cum” he says breathlessly grunting and groaning.

You decide on the spot to let him cum in you, without condom. You wanna feel him release his hot cum, his frustrations melt into you. This has never happened before but you craved it you wanted to be breed and cummed in like an animal in heat. It’s the only thing that’ll satisfy right now in this very moment.

You lock your legs around his waist which makes him look at you from his upright position, he gets on his elbows still keeping the thrusts. “Maus I’m close I can’t keep going” he slurrs out “I’ll make you cum I promise after I’ve cum I’ll eat your sweet cunt I’ll finger your tight wet pussy just let me cum.” He’s almost crying from having to hold back his orgasm his hips stuttering against yours

“Cum in me König, please I need you to fill me please cum for me” König hears speak these like a scripture from his own personal heaven. He has no time to react when the biggest orgasm he’s ever felt rips through him cause him to lock his legs and hips against yours buried so deep in you you can feel the hot cum filling your walls up. He moan/groans so loud, You moan feeling just how much is pumping in you König’s face stuck in a eyes rolled back blissful look, his checks are red and his chest is blushed and hes trying to catch his breath, his heart still pounding and his cock finally stop squirting.

He feels his legs weaken and his arms collapse letting his head rest on your chest, he breathing really hard and he can her his heartbeat in his ears. You wrap your arms around him softly rubbing his back, laying a soft kiss on his head.

“Do you feel better König?” You whisper still feeling your own desire to cum.

He can feel his cock softly pluses still experiencing his high as it slowly comes down. He gathers himself and starts getting up slowly pulling his cock out watching as the cum follows after his tip leaves your opening. He feels on top of the world, no anger, no stress just pure bliss.

He then takes his two fingers scooping up the dripping cum and shoves it back in curling his fingers.

“Almost wasted a few drops Maus. Can’t have that.” he says in his low raspy voice the moaning really roughed his vocal cords.

You feel immediate pleasure and his fingers thick enough to stretch you in a comfortable way bringing your orgasm out weather you liked it or not. He always loved watching your legs shut tightly around his hand while you cum on his thrusting fingers, he slowed them riding out your high. The sound of your cum and his own mixing with his fingers stirring it made his softening cock twitch a little. He pulls his fingers out and crawled on to the bed pulling you with him.

“I feel much, much better.” He whispered. Feeling himself finally come down completely and he still felt you catching your breath next to him. He pulled you into a cuddle, kissing your forehead.

“I feel better too” you slightly giggled making him laugh under his breath. He closed his eyes listening to you come down. He waited a few moments and felt another urge in his body.

“Meine Love… i am starving” he said with a slight smile, when he heard you laugh a little.

“Can we order delivery… I am too tired now” you spoke softly.

He smiled “of course. But I have to do the laundry… the bed is soaked under us.”

Notes: I love writing about König frustrated he’s just so ARF ARF ARF did not proofread cause I am lazy. Also sorry it’s so long idk why I kept writing lol

#konig call of duty #konig mw2 #konig #konig cod #konig modern warfare #konig mwii #konig smut #könig call of duty #könig cod #könig smut #konig x you #konig x reader #konig imagine #könig mw2 #könig x you #könig #könig x reader #könig modern warfare #könig fanfiction #könig x y/n #König breeding

[scoobysnakz]

Hard Luck

It’s hard finding love when your sole reason to live is your daughter, but when her best friends dad is annoyingly attractive and might have something to do with your rent randomly getting paid, who can blame you for being a little curious?

||* miguel being a gentlemen, slight angst, dialogue heavy, did the math and Val would have been born around the same time as us so i just made her say what i would have

Chap iii

2094

It's dark outside. Pinpricks of light shining through the inky blue blanket that is the night sky illuminate Raya’s face.

There's not a hint of disappointment, regret or anger. Just pure excitement as she stares out the window waiting for her daddy to come for her birthday.

She should have gone to bed hours ago but her blood is pumping with too much energy for her to even sit still. Her fingers drum frantically against the cool glass while she rocks on the balls of her feet giddily.

“It's late, RayRay,” you say in the softest tone you can muster.

Your arms drape over her shoulders as you turn her around to face you. “Let's go shower you and you can sleep in my bed, a treat for your birthday.”

She tilts her head back to look at you, innocent eyes blinking slowly. And there it is- that disappointment you prayed she would never have to feel. Because you already have and it hurts.

Lips trembling and nose scrunched, she wraps her tiny arms around you.

“He's not coming is he?” You can hear the betrayal in her fragile voice and it breaks your heart.

No child should have to feel the damage Graham has caused her. No adult could deal with it as calmly as her either.

You have no idea how to comfort her, nobody has ever taught you how. Maybe if someone had been there for you in moments like this then soothing your daughter's pain would be easier.

“That's not important,” you whisper into her hair, the smell of her strawberry shampoo filling your nose. “You don't need your dad to have a good birthday.”

Raya clutches your t-shirt with her pudgy hands, pulling herself closer to you. Her head buries into your chest, and you silently pray that she can't hear the rapid beating of your heart.

Conflicting emotions surge within you—anger towards Graham for repeatedly letting down your daughter, and heartbreak for Raya. But above all, you refuse to let her feel unloved by him.

The thought that she might experience the same hollowness in her stomach whenever her dad is mentioned, just as you do, fuels your anger. It contorts your face as you struggle to contain the fury.

"He loves you so, so much," you whisper, your hand gently caressing her back in a soothing rhythm.

She shakes her head, her chest tightening as she stifles her tears.

"You can cry, you know," you say, attempting a lighthearted tone, aware that she needs to release her emotions. And she does.

Her muffled sobs resonate through the cramped living room, the only sound that fills the space. In a defeated tone, she murmurs a tearful apology, and it takes all your strength to not break down alongside her.

All you can do is assure her of the love that both you and Graham have for her, even though deep down, you know it's a lie. The Instagram posts of Graham and his new girlfriend celebrating their two-week anniversary have made his intentions painfully clear. You refuse to inflict that pain upon her.

After what feels like an eternity of embracing Raya, and listening to her desperate sobs, she finally pulls herself away. Tear streaks glisten on her cheeks as she attempts to wipe them away with the back of her hands.

"Crying helped," she breathes shakily, her eyes still watery.

Dust particles twirl in the dimly lit room, resembling glowing fireflies as they dance through the air.

"We still have some leftover cake, and you have new jammies for your birthday," you say, mustering a forced smile.

Anything to bring a smile to her face. Anything to halt her tears. Anything to make her forget about her disappointing father.

2099

Your fingers nervously drumming on the countertop, soft vibrations filling the cramped kitchen. A bag of bread and a tub of butter stare back at you, waiting, willing, for you to turn them into a sandwich.

But you’ve got other things on your mind.

You feel so stupid for granting Miguel, a stranger, permission to pick your daughter up from school. Yes he’s Gabi’s dad and Gabi is Raya’s best friend but you know nothing about him.

He doesn't seem like a bad guy but you aren't exactly Einstein when it comes to first impressions. Those two dry and excruciatingly awkward conversations between the two of you leave an irritating amount to the imagination.

You’ve managed to figure out he works at Alchemax, the lanyard that hangs loosely from his neck on a thin black strap being a key factor, but this is about it.

For all you know, he could be some sort of pervert who wants to kidnap Raya.

And you, who got lost in the kaleidoscope of browns and reds that are his eyes, were idiotic enough to not even give him your number, an address to drop Raya off at.

Pinching your nose bridge, you push away all of your unnecessarily dramatic hypothetical scenarios and let out a low groan before opening the fridge to see if there's any cheese. And there isn't any- much to your dismay.

Val wants cheese and you don't have the energy to disappoint a sweet old lady today.

***

It's warm inside the shop, heated air blankets around you and the inviting smell of the bakery fills your nose.

You feel out of place here. Normally when you go shopping it's with vouchers stuffed into whatever pockets you can find in your rain-slick jacket, all torn out from magazines and a few you printed off online. But now you have only your credit and the feeble amount of money stored in it.

Of course, Val had offered to pay and of course, you declined. Even after she pressed the twenty dollar bill in the crease of your palm you continued to protest against it. However, the temptation to keep it for yourself had been present.

“Is cheddar okay?” you question while peering into the cool glass fridge, shelves lined with a variety of cheeses priced far too high for your liking.

She nods at your request, silvery gray strands falling loose from her bun.

The two of you make your way over to the tills, you step aside, allowing her to pass before taking a few steps forward. The pattern continues as the two of you slowly approach the checkout.

You lob the single block of cheddar onto the till, the conveyor belt moving tantalizingly slow. The worker at the other end simply rolls their eyes before snarling at you.

Your stomach twists at that.

“That’ll be six dollars,” the cashier draws out, eyes looking at you lazily, expectantly.

Once again, Val offers to pay, “Please pet, it's my sandwich anyway,” she pleads.

You dismiss her with a quick smile and tell her to stand by the window. Accepting money from people should come easily to you by now. But it doesn't.

She complies with you, she always does.

“Are you going to pay or…?” they quiz dryly as if they couldn't see the conversation you were having, card reader held aloft in their hand.

“Yeah, sorry,” you force a polite tone, teeth gritted and brow furrowed.

You start to dig in your purse for your credit card. It's messy, your purse, and you know it is. Random pieces of loose change and a few discarded receipts crumpled up into tiny balls.

Eventually, you pull out a card you are 99% certain has money on it. So you tap it on the reader and wait for the little ding of authorization that means you aren't completely broke.

“Try again.”

You tap your card again but it doesn't go through.

“Put your pin in,” the enthusiasm is practically leaking from their every pore.

Carefully, you slot your card into the reader and cross your fingers that it will work. Your freehand quickly types in the four-digit code <em>2090<em> and you wait yet again for that ding of authorisation.

“Didn't go through,” they yawn.

You feel as though all eyes are on you despite it being only you and the cashier within earshot of this mortifying situation.

“It should have,” you croak. Your hand shakes now as you type in the code for a final time. You can practically feel the sweat dripping off your skin and smudging on the clicky buttons.

“Mmm.”

You bite your lower lip, panic starting to infiltrate your brain. The two quarters and random dimes in your purse won't be enough.

You look over at Val, in her own little world gazing out of the window. You can't ask her to pay now- not after you rejected her offers already. And the thought of it makes you feel uncomfortable.

“Can I try again?” the shop is relatively quiet so you aren't too worried about holding others up.

But your card has declined three times, and the cashier is looking more and more agitated and Val is now looking at you again even though she wasn't moments ago and your palms are getting sweaty and it's freakishly hot in here and your chest is tight and you can't afford this six dollar cheese and you can't afford your rent.

“Hey, stranger.”

Immediately, your head snaps up, tilted back painfully far just to see who’s talking to you.

That, somehow, familiar scent of vanilla and something you can't quite place yet enjoy fills your nose.

“Hey,” you reply, gaze flickering between Miguel and the cashier.

You're breathing heavily, nails digging into your palm and your shirt sticking to your back with sweat you had no idea had formed on your skin.

He looks down at the small, blue, plastic card in your hand and quirks an eyebrow. “Buying… cheese?”

Buying is a funny way to put it.

“Are you getting the cheese or not?” the cashier asks voice raised and elbows leaning on the cool metal of the till.

Miguel turns to face the cashier, brow furrowed and lips pulled into a tight grimace. That attitude they have with you, doesn't sit right with him.

The shame you feel right now, it's blood-curdling, gut-wrenching even. You can't bring yourself to look at Miguel, not when he's staring down the unbothered worker as if they've just told you to shoot yourself.

“Yeah I will now,” you breathe heavily.

You pause a moment, hoping that Miguel will just move his shopping to another till but he just stands there.

“I’m sorry but you're taking ages and this guy has shopping to pay for,” it's clear how annoyed they are now.

So you slot in your card and type in the code. You stare at the reader, hands fisted and lips pursed.

The moment you see the tiny red cross appear on the screen you cough, a feeble attempt to cover up the beeping noise of rejection.

If the ground swallowed you whole right now you would thank it. You would encourage it to push further down through its digestive system until it shits you out someplace random. As long as it's not here.

Before you get the chance to break down and allow the tears that have been welling up in your eyes to spill, you feel an arm wrap snake around your waist and pull you close.

“You silly thing babe,” Miguel chuckles down at you, “you took the wrong card.”

Completely bewildered, you lean your head back to face him.

You glance over at Val, still staring out the window while fiddling with the buttons on her coat. She looks so content in herself, smiling lazily as if there is not a single problem in the world.

Miguel’s fingers curling into your hip bring you back to the moment. And weirdly, it doesn't feel uncomfortable. Strange, yes, but not uncomfortable.

You plaster a cheesy smile on your face and press yourself closer to him. “What are you doing?” you hiss.

He hands a sleek purple card from his wallet and hands it to you. “Take this, yeah?”

Your stomach instantly drops. He’s paying for this stupid six-dollar cheese that you can't afford. Now you owe him for something so tiny and petty.

“You pay for this cheese and wait for me outside, amor,” he mumbles into your hair.

You consider pulling away from him, asking him what he's playing at. But you don't. Because you've embarrassed yourself enough and… he's smiling at you.

Those pearly whites beaming down at you. If you look at his boyish grin any longer you’re going to start blushing.

“Take it,” he wiggles the card in front of your hand as if he's teasing you.

You grab the card, heart pounding and chest test, and refuse to say so much as thank you.

And you pay for the cheese, with Miguel’s money and butterflies in your stomach that you wish weren't there.

You’ve owed people money before, a great deal of money, but it's never felt this bad. Yes, Miguel’s a semi-stranger but it feels worse somehow- that you know him.

The cheese feels heavier now, like a ton of bricks wearing thick winter jackets. It doesn't feel right in your hands, it feels out of place to be holding something that Miguel’s paid for.

You cart Val out of the shop, one hand on her walker and the other on her back while you skillfully balance the cheese in between your fingers.

You look back inside the shop and you see Miguel. He looks so casual, so calm, so at ease, as if he didn't just have to buy cheese for you.

Is he just a nice guy or is there something more sinister going on? Is this some weird plan so that you end up owing him buckets of money?

But it felt so nice, him holding you close and whispering into your hair. It felt right, him helping you out without you having to ask him. You don't even feel angry with him. Because you miss the feel of him against you.

You stand there staring at her, debating whether or not Miguel actually wants you to wait outside or not.

“Let's just wait a moment,” you coax with an uneasy grin.

The rain patters on the ground, small spittle of water splashing onto your legs. It's light now- lighter than before anyway. Dark black clouds now a light grey and a hint of sun shining through the gaps.

You glance over to your right and you see Miguel exiting the shop, thin plastic bags lining the natal trolley he's pushing.

Awkwardly, you jog over to him and immediately cringe at how stupid you look. “Hey,” you grin at him.

“You waited,” he pulls the trolley to the side.

His deep eyes bore down into yours and you feel that red-hot shame again. You quickly look over at Val before meeting Miguel’s gaze again. “Can we stand over there?” you mumble with a nod in her direction.

“This is Val, I'm here carer.” Val grins at Miguel, her frail hand held out for him to shake which he takes with a shy smile.

“So…” you start, “is that how you usually flirt, buying girl’s cheese?”

His pursed lips curl up into a smirk as he tries to stifle his chuckle, but it comes out anyway. It's a soft laugh, a sweet one even. And it makes your insides melt into a puddle of flusteredness.

“I wasn't flirting, just helping you out,” his tone is cold, not harsh, just cold like when Gabi left and his smile faded except this time he's still smiling at you. You quirk an eyebrow at him but don't say anything else.

Val clears her throat, her hand tugging at your elbow. “Can we leave now? I want my sandwich,” her tone is friendly but you can tell she's getting fed up with this dry conversation. You nod your head at her, not even giving Miguel a second glance. But not because you're trying to hide the blush on your cheeks.

“I need your number.”

You turn back round to face him, lips pursed as you try to hide your smirk.

“You weren't flirting with me but you need my number?” you tease and Val just chuckles, suddenly loving this.

He takes a step forward, a small one but it closes so much distance between the two of you. His broad shoulders cast a shadow over you and suddenly you're in the playground once again, his cologne playing havoc with your senses while you oggle this god of a man.

You go to take a step back but you don't, he's still smiling, he's not trying to intimidate you, he's not trying to make you feel inferior. He's smiling. At you.

“If I'm picking Raya up from school I think that's more than fair, don't you?” there's a smirk tugging at the corner of his lips. His eyes bore into yours and you look away, embarrassed that your playful teasing ended up in this.

“Yeah, yeah. That's fair,” you nod, gaze glued to the concrete flags painted with rain.

He opens his phone and you tell him your number. You know it by heart, always scared to pull out your seven-year-old cracked phone in public.

You watch as he walks away, dark hair growing wetter and wetter as the rain pours onto it. He doesn't even flinch, just lets it roll off him and you love it. Shirt clinging to his skin and giving you a small glimpse of his toned figure.

“He’s got a rocking bod.”

You burst out laughing, shoulders shaking and all, at her words. “Val!” you scold halfheartedly.

#atsv miguel #miguel o'hara #miguel spiderman #miguel spiderverse #miguel x reader #miguel x you #spider man 2099 #spiderman 2099 #miguel

[notroosterbradshaw]

slow dancing in a burning room - preview

this is very, very rough. our couple are going thru it during this fic. it won’t be fluffy, smutty goodness, there will be a lot of hurt, disappointment, anger and probably a few other themes that seem out of the ordinary for this universe. i hope you enjoy when I eventually post x

You inspected Bradley closely. If not for a few scratches and what you imagined was a lot of concealed contusions, he seemed fine. “Thank God,” you wrapped your arms around him, taking him into your arms. “I didn’t think I was going to see you again.”

“I’m here, love. I’m safe,” he murmured into your hair, inhaling deeply, the scent grounding him and reminding him he was home. He wrapped you into his arms and lifted your feet from the floor as you concealed your sequel as well as you could. “I’m so tired,” he muttered. “Take me to bed?”

“Of course,” you said. “Let me get you some water and I’ll meet you in bed, okay?”

He shook his head. “No, you come with me,” he gave a coy grin, leading you to the bedroom and pressing you back against the door. He grasped your jaw and kissed you deeply. “I missed the way you taste,” he admitted. “I didn’t think I was going to be able to do this again.”

You felt your mind blank because at no time was this ever a risk for you, you didn’t know how close he was to not coming home. But you were terrified to ask for the full story… you knew he wasn’t at liberty to even say anything, so you remained quiet. You gently pulled back to look at him and he softened a little.

“What, love?” he whispered, searching your face. When he didn’t get a response, he changed his tack and lowered his lips to your jaw, his palms gripping your hips and closing in the gap to keep you trapped. He sighed against your skin. “You smell so good, feel so soft, my sweet girl. I just can’t get enough of you,” he pressed his thigh between yours and released your hips to grasp your wrists and drag them above your head.

He was hard and craving, desperate for you and you found it hard to resist him.

“I just don’t want to hurt you,” you admitted quietly and his tongue paused tracing your clavicle. “Come on, stop,” you begged gently. 

“You could never hurt me,” he frowned a little, his tone soft. “Ever.”

“I know you’re aching, sweetheart,” you told him.

“When I tell you that there is nothing that could stop this, I’m being completely honest. I need to feel home. Let me bury myself into you, please?” he huffed against your skin, his stubble unfamiliar and rough against the skin of your cheek. “Kiss me, love. Fall into this. Please?” he begged, feeling the hesitation dripping from you.

“You doctor’s said bedrest,” Bradley,” you said, a little warily.

“Then take me to bed,” he turned it against you and in a simple feat of strength, he hoisted you into his arms. You didn’t miss the slight grimace he tried to play off and it only made you feel worse.

“Bradley…”

“I got this,” he reassured you and opened the bedroom door. He needed to prove to you that it was a couple of scratches and a few bruises, maybe a new scare or so. It wasn’t a big deal. The room was exactly how he remembered it, and he was enveloped by the scent of your perfume, rooting him firmly home. He noted you’d left some clean clothes at the end of your bed and his side drawn. Painkillers, a wheat bag. A glass of water waiting and a book he didn’t recognise. “You put all this together?” he asked, taken back at your kindness. He would never admit it, but it was such a homely welcome. His bones ached, and his head was splitting though his heart lurched, it looked so inviting. He was so incredibly touched you’d ever consider him this way.

“Well, yeah…” you said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. “You ejected from a plane and crashed onto an aircraft carrier. I figured you might need a little TLC,” you said like it was the most obvious reply in the world.

He laughed. “All right, you got me. Take me to bed, sweet girl,” he released you and you smiled, taking him by the hand towards the bed.

POSTED HERE.

#preview #the boyfriend experience #rooster #rooster x reader #rooster angst #rooster fluff #rooster smut #please don't let me regret this

[uniquevoidflowers]

This is a fic based off of @kikker-oma's whumptober art!!! Please go check that out first!

Wind walked up to the captain, fists clenched as he tried not to sob. He stood there for a few seconds, glaring at his older brother. “Something on your mind there, sailor?” Warriors croaked.

Wind’s shoulders shook as his fist tightened even more. “You’re a liar.” He spat. 

Warriors took a shaky breath. Wind didn’t acknowledge him, caught up in his own anger. “Sailor, please—“

“SHUT UP! I-I thought he would be okay!” Wind screamed. 

“He will be.” Warriors mumbled. 

The sailor couldn’t stop the tears that flowed down his face. He didn’t know exactly why he was so angry, maybe it was because Warriors couldn’t be telling the truth. Wind had seen the state of Time, the old man that he had clung to constantly for warmth and safety. “How do you know t-that?!” Wind hiccuped.

 Warriors was trembling, the rod in his hands shaking. “He can’t die on us…he just can’t…” 

“I KNEW IT! You…You don’t have a real reason…!” Wind screamed and stormed off.

“Sailor w-wait!” The captain called, pain laced into his voice.

The kid didn’t listen and walking became full-blown sprinting as he rushed into the forest.  Tears flew out of his face and made his vision blurry and then he stumbled to the ground, catching himself with his hands. His hands and knees stung as he rubbed his hands together gently trying to alleviate some of the pain. “Please Hylia if you’re hearing this…let Warriors be right…let Time…” He broke off at the end.

The sailor never really prayed but he was willing to if it meant the old man would survive. He curled into himself and swallowed back sobs. 

(“NO!” Twilight cried out and everyone jerked around just in time to see the old man slam into the ground.)

He buried his head into his arms.

(“Pay attention sailor!” Someone yelled at him and he deflected attacks from enemies, pale from the words he heard spilling out of the captain’s mouth.)

Silence rang in his ears as he tried desperately to shove the images out of his mind.

(Once the dust settled the sailor couldn’t help but run to see what had happened and he found Time lying on the ground, blood pooling beneath him. His breath caught in his throat.)

“N-no…” He whispered to himself.

(Someone grabbed his hand and pulled him away as Warriors yelled Time’s name over and over again. He struggled against whoever was holding him but they had a tight and firm grasp.)

His wrists were sore suddenly.

(“What’s going on?!” Wind screeched. “Time got hurt but Warriors is healing him. Everything will be okay.” The someone tried to soothe. “Stop talking to me like that!”)

The anger in his heart only grew, at the tones that everyone was using with him. He was a hero dammit. 

(“I want the truth!” Wind urged. No one answered. “PLEASE!” He yelled.)

He shuddered.

(“We need to move, quickly!” Warriors shouted, scooping the old man into his arms. Wind’s blood ran cold at the sight of the Hero of Time.)

“Wind?” 

“L-leave me alone.” The sailor rasped.

Arms wrapped around him instead and he saw the captain there, eyes shining and a heartbreaking frown on his face. Wind felt something in his heart that he didn’t quite recognize. “I’m tired of you guys treating me like a little kid.” 

“We’re not trying…it’s just…hard not to.” Warriors sighed.

“How so?” Wind asked, and his voice is so small, barely audible.

“If you saw, say, Legend as a kid, younger than you, and he was about to see this gory mess of a man that he loves, would you let him?” Warriors asked.

That…actually made a lot of sense. “No.” He murmured.

The captain sighed with empathy. “We’re doing our best to help Time, okay?” 

“I know…I’m sorry…” Wind wailed and held tighter unto Warriors.

“It’s okay. It’ll be okay, I promise.” Warriors soothed.

Wind let the captain guide him back to camp where he saw Time in bandages, lying limply on a bedroll. Hyrule was passed out next to him. The sailor put a hand to his mouth in dismay. Warriors sighed deeply, catching a glimpse of what Wind saw and then pulled the kid away towards a different bedroll. Wind had just realized the sky was dark, and it was nighttime. “Good night sailor.” Warriors whispered.

“Night.” Wind smiled slightly and crept into his bedroll, grateful for the warmth it provided  him. 

________________ -/- _________________

“NO!” Twilight cried out and everyone jerked around just in time to see the old man slam into the ground.

He froze, what-ifs running through his mind. “Pay attention sailor!” Someone yelled at him and he deflected attacks from enemies, pale from the words he heard spilling out of the captain’s mouth.

The battle continued, Wind fighting and giving the occasional glance at the unmoving Time. Once the dust settled the sailor couldn’t help but run to see what had happened and he found Time lying on the ground, blood pooling beneath him. His breath caught in his throat. “Time?” He whispered.

 Someone grabbed his hand and pulled him away as Warriors yelled Time’s name over and over again. He struggled against whoever was holding him but they had a tight and firm grasp.

“What’s going on?!” Wind screeched. 

“Time got hurt but Warriors is healing him. Everything will be okay.” The someone tried to soothe. 

“Stop talking to me like that!” Wind demanded, trying again and again to free his wrists.

“I want the truth!” Wind urged.

 No one answered. “PLEASE!” He yelled.

“Wind—“

“We need to move, quickly!” Warriors shouted, scooping the old man into his arms. 

Wind’s blood ran cold at the sight of the Hero of Time. Everything was burned into his eyes, and he wanted answers. He wanted to know everything that had just happened. Why were they ignoring him?  His throat felt dry as tears streamed down his pale face. There was an uncomfortable silence as they rushed to find a place to stay or set up camp, the only sounds were rain pouring and boots hitting the drenched ground. Wind didn’t dare speak up, he didn’t want to be babied even more. He caught another glimpse of the old man and realized just how awful it was. There were arrows sticking out of his back and a stab wound in his chest. Wind had trouble keeping full-blown sobs from arising.

________________-/-________________

Wind awoke with a gasp, and looked around to see the one and only captain on watch. He saw everyone else sleeping soundly in their bedrolls. Warriors eyes had no light in them, he just stared at the crackling flames. “Captain?” Wind murmured.

Warriors startled and looked over. “Hey, you should be asleep sailor. Is everything okay?” Warriors asked, concern clear in his features.

“I’m okay, just worried. What about you?” He asked, eyeing the man.

“I’m fine, we’ll get through this. Just like we did with the rancher.” Warriors looked away, recalling that episode.

“You sure?” Wind furrowed his eyebrows. 

“Yeah. Go back to sleep sailor.” Warriors urged.

Wind wanted to press further, but he didn’t know if that would help the captain. So he sighed and defeatedly walked back to his bedroll. But there was something up with Warriors, and Wind had a gut feeling it was very bad.

#linked universe #lu wind #lu warriors #lu time #kind of #guys warriors isnt okay #also time survives dw #but he gives everyone a rlly good scare #my writing #linked universe fanfic

[doodle-pops]

Manwë Discovering Your Lightning Scars

Request: Hello Mina! How are you going? I hope you’re well 💕 May I please request a fic or headcannon for Manwë or Namo x reader who has lightning strike scars? She (or Gn!) has lightning patterned scars across and down her shoulders and up her neck, nothing crazy, maybe a pale red color but definitely noticeable. It can be something like the story of how she got them or insecurities if a fic. If headcannons then just their general reactions and things in headcannons I guess? Thank you! - Anon

A/N: A pleasure to fulfil your request dearie. I did an all-in-one with the request, meshing both the headcanon and short imagine because I still could not decide between a headcanon and a fic. I also took an angst route with this >.<

·⊰ When Manwё discovers his lover has lightning scars, he would be a mixture of awe, terror and confusion. If you had managed to be struck by lightning, then it was a miracle you survived such a violent interaction.

·⊰ Being marvelled at the gorgeous patterns intricately dancing and interwoven across the expanse of your back, his hands would lightly ghost your skin. There is a part of him itching to touch the red spider-like veins, but he’s also petrified, believing that they would cause pain if he were to.

·⊰ His face would falter when he learned that you were insecure about your scars, always covering up and never wearing any clothing article that revealed the slightest skin. Giving small praise as his eyes fell on your scars and creating poetic phrases as he went along.

·⊰ Feeling as though he had some part to play in your accident, he would begin to apologise for mistakenly losing control or releasing a lightning storm so absentmindedly without being aware of anyone around who could possibly be struck.

·⊰ Eyes growing soft and heartstrings tugging, he's determined to get you to love yourself and see your beautiful. Along the way, he'd make a mental note to have more garments designed to show off or highlight the beauty of your skin.

·⊰ Manwё would consider you blessed and gift you a name signifying how lucky and blessed you were at the same time. But knowing the Elder King, since lightning were an extension of him and his abilities, he would also feel guilty.

·⊰ His heart would clench at the idea of him being responsible for your scars even though you would explain to him that it was your fault for running outside in the middle of a lightning storm precariously.

·⊰ But it doesn’t matter how much you preach to the Elder King that he wasn’t to feel guilty or to be blamed, his ability to feel immense levels of empathy and sympathy for others would urge him to behave apologetically. In his heart, he believes that he has some part to play in the incident.

·⊰ As his lover, you would have to spend a copious time holding his face within your hands, stroking his over his worrisome features and attempting to straighten them out. “Manwё, my sweet radiant love, please. I am well and I do not hold you accountable— it’s my clumsy self.”

·⊰ Your worrying King would perhaps crumble into your arms feeling distressed because you had no idea that lightning storms only occurred when he was enraged. So your lightning scars were an outcome of a moment he was having over his brother’s despicable actions.  

·⊰ Poor you still hadn’t understood why he was so apologetic and constantly hugging you while crying into your hair.

“Manwё? What are telling me?” you whimpered as the words fell from his lips while he buried his face into your hair. The arms that were snaked around your waist had tightened, terrified of you running away and abandoning him after learning the truth. He hadn’t meant to; you weren’t even a target. A simple outcome of anger— losing control in the spur of the moment— and his rage came crashing upon the earth in a series of violent intricate patterns. Striking the earth furiously for every action his brother precariously displayed.

Breathing shakily, the Elder King's muffled voice cried out, “I’m sorry for harming you my dove. I truly did not mean to injure you or take your life. Forgive me please.”

His words took time to register within your mind and when they did, your eyes widened in horror at what they meant. Despite the horror on your face and the skip in your heartbeat, your mind sang a different song to you, ‘He didn’t mean it Y/N’. You knew the Elder King would never bring harm to you purposefully, but hearing that an injury you gained was a result of his losing control, you found it alarming. “I…don’t blame you Manwё, it was an accident— a life-threatening one, but I don’t hate you. I’m alive, a survivor,” you consoled with small rubs and pats to the King’s back and head.

Withdrawing from your embrace while keeping his arms around your waist, he raised his head to be at your level. His stormy blue eyes gazed into yours with the utmost sympathy and concern, apologies were written across his crinkled face. “I never thought that I would truly injure someone with my…unruly outburst. I’m always careful, I always remember to be careful,” he whimpered. You could feel his fingers pressing into your lower vertebrate, careful not to touch the areas where the scars were present. It was no mistake that you felt his hesitancy to touch his accident.

“My love, my sweet ĕrĕmelda,” you cupped his face in your smaller hands, “even if you created the lightning storm, it was me being clumsy and running outside to only be struck. Blame not yourself.” You then leaned in to bump noses against the other and brought him in for a kiss.

“…You are right, I shouldn’t worry so greatly…” his voice then fell into silence before piquing up in confusion, “but why did you run outside in the middle of a lightning storm?”

Fumbling with your response, you cautiously laughed at the foolish reason for the result of your injury. You knew he'd stare at you as though you grew five heads. “. . .Well, um. . .I wanted to see the lightning storm up close. . .” you softly mumbled, fiddling with your thumbs, “it was just me being clumsy.”

Staring at you flabbergasted, the Elder King didn't know if to reprimand you or remain silent. Gripping your shoulders and giving you a firm shake, he commanded with concern in his tone, “You are staying inside during all lightning storms. In fact, you're stay inside during any flashy event. . .for your own good!”

Masterlist

Taglist: @edensrose @cilil @eunoiaastralwings @noldorinpainter @ranhanabi777 @spidergirla5 @lilmelily @someoneinthestars @mysticmoomin @aconstructofamind @starborne0661 @floraroselaughter @the-phantom-of-arda @rain-on-my-umbrella @singleteapot @wandererindreams @asianbutnotjapanese @justellie17 @justjane @silverose365

#manwë x reader #manwë #manwë súlimo #manwe #manwe sulimo #manwe x reader #manwë imagine #manwë headcanon #manwë scenario #manwe imagine #manwe headcanon #silmarillion x reader #silmarillion imagine #silmarillion headcanon #silmarillion fluff #middle earth headcanons #middle earth x reader #middle earth imagine #middle earth fluff #x reader fluff #x reader insert #ainur #valar #silmarillion #doodlepops writings ✨

[ladyescapism]

second choice - Azriel part 1

warnings: , insecurity, breaking up

word count: 1,500

part 2

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You had been his pet for years. You followed him around like a lost puppy looking for attention. You turned down other males, good males who wanted no one else but you so you could stay with him. 

You used to have hope for a future with Azriel. That one day he would pull his head out of his ass and finally see you for what you were. A kind, loving female who wanted him. Who saw him and didn’t run away. 

You had let him fuck you. Always on his terms. Always when he wanted. Sometimes he would want you every day for months and sometimes he wouldn’t spare you a second glance for weeks. Not for lack of trying on your part. 

But tonight, you decided, there would be no more. 

You knew it was coming. Elain was getting married to Lucien. And a few days ago, Gwen announced that she would be travelling all over the Night Court recruiting females to join the Valkyrie ranks. 

He was finally out of better options, and he would be looking for you to warm his bed. 

But you would refuse. For the first time in knowing him, you would refuse him something. 

Elain looked stunning in her wedding dress. She was on the other side of the ball room in the River House, beaming at her husband and mate. They both looked so happy. Standing not far from her, was Azriel. He looked at her with such longing, such sadness that she was fully and completely out of reach. 

He might as well have buried Truth Teller in your heart. 

You needed some fresh air. 

Making your way to the back patio for some cool night air. The looked out over the beautifully curated gardens. Seeing them only made you think of Elain and all her delicate, feminine ways. How she was everything you weren’t. 

You only got a few minutes of wallowing in self-pity before an all too familiar sent flooded your nose. You let him stand behind you for a moment, thinking maybe he would leave you alone so you wouldn’t break his heart more tonight. 

“Not a fan parties,” he asked. 

Damn him, you thought. 

“I was enjoying the party,” you lied. “It was just getting a little too stuffy in there with everybody in Pyrthian in the ball room.” 

“I don’t think it was everyone.” 

“Close to it.” 

He was quite for a moment before he spoke the words he didn’t know would damn himself. 

“Do you want to get out of here?” 

You almost said yes on instinct. 

Azriel mistook your silence as conformation and tried to take you by the arm to lead you away. 

“No,” you whispered. 

He just looked at you in surprise. 

“And that’s a permeant no.” 

“What,” he questioned. 

“I can’t do this anymore, Azriel,” you whispered. “I can’t keep being your second choice.” 

“Your not-“ 

“Yes, I am,” you cut him off, your voice rising in anger at his denial. “I am always your second option. When Elain isn’t around to pine after and Gwen is done giving chase, I am the other option to warm your bed. And I’m done.” 

“Did I do something?”

“Yes, you jerk. I have been waiting here for you to finally notice me, but you never will. I will never be pretty or smart or good enough for you, so I’m done. I’m done putting my life on hold for a male who only wants me for my body, some of the time.” 

He looked like a kicked puppy. 

“I know that you never meant to hurt me. But you did. You broke my heart every time you would look at one of them in the way I was desperate for you to look at me.” 

You were crying now. 

“Because that’s what I was. Desperate. For love. For attention. And at one time just sex when you needed distraction or release felt good for me too, but not anymore.” 

“I never meant-“ he cut himself off. He knows that was what he meant and couldn’t even bring himself to lie to you. 

“I will be here for you, Azriel. But as a friend, not a whore.” 

“You are not a whore,” he insisted. 

“You’re right. I’m not anymore.” 

He brought his hand up to cup your face, but you pulled away quickly. 

“Go back to the party, Azriel,” you said, still crying. “There has to be another desperate girl in there somewhere.” 

He just hung his head for a moment and walked away. 

You watched him, and as he closed the patio doors behind him, you covered your mouth to stifle the sob you could no longer hold back. 

Dropping to the floor, you let the emotions wash over you. 

The pain. The guilt. The relief. 

He looked so sad. Like the only sure thing he had just left him. Like the only person he thought liked him left him. 

“I would ask if you were alright, but I think I can figure out the answer from here,” a cocky voice came from a few feet away. 

In your sorrowful state, you hadn’t heard the freshly minted High Lord of the Autumn Court walk up. 

“Oh,” you said, quickly wiping your tears and scrambling to get off the ground. “High Lord Eris. It’s nice to see you.” 

“You as well, Professor,” he said curtly, offering you his hand in assistance. You took it. 

“Thank you, my lord.” 

“Not a problem.” 

Well, this was awkward.

You met Eris a few times before he was High Lord. He was working with the Inner Circle at the same time you were. 

You were a professor at the University of Velaris. You taught mathematics and engineering. That’s why you were involved with the Inner Circle. You had designed some weapons that you needed money to manufacture. The kind of money a High Lord could offer, should he be interested.  

Rhysand had been interested in your weapons and funded your research and the production of your weapons. One of the conditions of your agreement with him was that you would come over once a week and share your updates on the weapon. 

You had met Eris a few times then. Apparently, Rhysand made all his meetings on the same day. You had even had dinner with him once. Alongside the rest of the Inner Circle, of course. 

“Have you made any new inventions,” he asked, surprising you with his interest. 

“No. I have been focusing on teaching now. I love being in the classroom.” 

“It takes a special kind of person to be an impactful teacher. You seem like one of those people.” 

“Thank you, my lord.” 

“Truth be told, while the compliment holds true, I am trying to distract you from what ever had you crying on the ground, but you keep getting that faraway look in your eyes that tells me that something is bothering you.” 

You just looked at the ground in shame and began crying again. 

Eris just stood there, looking at you as you made an emotional fool of yourself. Then he lifted your chin and made you look him in the eyes.

“Tell me,” he demanded softly. 

And then you unloaded. 

You told him everything. From being with Azriel, something that most of the Inner Circle didn’t know, from putting your life on hold for him, him making you feel worthless and unlovable. All of it. And he just listened.  

After you little ramble, all he said was, “I have my issues with the Shadow Singer, but I never thought him stupid till now.” 

You cocked your head in confusion.

“Stupid to let a female like you slip away. You, dear professor, are one of the smartest people I have ever met. Not to mention beautiful.” 

You couldn’t help the blush on your cheeks. 

“I’m not trying to flirt with you,” he assured you. “You have had an emotional night and I don’t want to take advantage of you this way. But, if I may start correspondence with you, it would make me a very happy male.”

“You mean letters,” you clarified. 

“Yes.” 

“I would like that. A lot.” 

“Lovely. I’m going to head back to the party now. But I look forward to hearing from you.” 

“As do I.” 

He turned and walked a few steps before turning back around.

“I can’t say that I know this Gwen person well enough to judge her personality but don’t compare yourself to Elain. What she has in beauty makes up for her lack of personality and brains.” 

You felt a little mean as you chuckled.

“You probably shouldn’t say that about your sister-in-law.” 

“Probably not, but it needed to be said.” 

“Go before you get yourself into trouble,” you pointed to the doors leading back to the party. “I won’t be the reason for more Vanserra family drama.” 

“Do you want to cause some drama,” he asked, a sly smile forming across his mouth. “I could be fun. And make the Shadow singer terribly jealous.” 

You felt a little bad, but not bad enough to stop yourself from asking, “What do you have in mind?” Eris just reached his hand out, “May I have this dance?

#azriel acotar #eris acotar #azriel angst #acotar #acotar imagine #azriel fic

[glitterandmoondustofficial]

Side to Side

Chapter 248: Love Goes On and On

Notes:

Characters: Law, Penguin Rating: Teen Warnings: language Notes: THAT’S RIGHT ANOTHER UPDATE!!!! Anyway here’s what Law has been thinking about.

Law stared up at his ceiling in the dead of night, thinking of his conversation with Ruby. He was wide awake after that question.

“Do you love me?”

What a fucking question.

She had been drinking, too. He could hear it in her voice. And she was miserable, that was unmistakable. 

She was doubting his love for her. It hurt him more than angered him. Of course he loved her! He loved her more than…more than…

Well he loved her more than himself, at least. Far more.

He knew he hadn’t always been good to her. He knew that he could be a complete asshole to her and she had given him far more chances than he truly deserved. He also knew that she was very much out of his league, especially when she always made herself up so beautifully and he looked like he hadn’t slept in days and only had coffee and indeterminate drugs to keep him chugging along.

There were probably tons of men and women in Dressrosa vying for her attention. She probably had already been proposed to. He wouldn’t blame her if she ran off on him, releasing the den den mushi into the wild and leaving him and their plan behind. Maybe she would finally find someone worthy of her, of her smile and her laughter. Someone who didn’t make her cry in despair or anger. Someone who didn’t drag her down into the deep, cold depths of unmistakable fury and sorrow.

She deserved so much better than him.

But he loved her. He loved her so completely, so fully. So deep within his soul that he would never be the same without her, he would never be able to move on. His heart would always be hers, even if she didn’t want it anymore.

He turned on his side and stared at where Ruby should be sleeping. It was her spot. Her pillow was still where it belonged. 

“Law,” Ruby mumbled into her pillow one morning. He hummed and pulled her in closer, burying his face in her thick air. He palmed her stomach, pushing his hand under her tank top. “Why are you still here?” She yawned. “I figured you’d be half a pot of coffee in by now.”

He breathed her in. “I want to spend some time with you,” he admitted.

She grabbed his wrist and pulled his arm around her. He curled into her, kissing the back of her neck through her hair. “I feel so spoiled.”

“You should,” he said with a smile. “I don’t like missing out on the first pot of coffee.”

“Yes, I know. There’s nothing you love more than the first sip of black coffee unspoiled by milk or sugar.”

Law opened his eyes and stared into Ruby’s chocolate brown hair. She didn’t say anything more, she only relaxed against him. She laced their fingers together and let out a tired sigh. “There is something I love more than that.”

“Oh, right, Corazon, of course.”

Law opened his mouth and closed it. He frowned. How many walls and layers did she perceive herself to be behind? Did she just accept that she would never be in at least his top five most loved things? Did she think she even made the list? She was the love of his life, the woman who he slept next to every night, the woman he bore his heart and soul to. 

“You,” he tried. “I love you more.”

She was silent and she didn’t move. Did she not believe him? Was she unsure of his devotion to her? 

Of course she fucking was. How could she not be?

He had dedicated his life to revenge; to avenging his savior, to killing Doflamingo. It was his priority, it was his whole life. Ruby had just barely come into it. She had only just become one of his top priorities and after hearing about his past and his goals there was no doubt she had put herself low on the list of things that he loved.

“I see,” she said after some silence. 

He needed to be better to her.

He pulled on her, turning her so that she laid on her back. She stared up at him, blinking a couple of times. A curious look formed in her eyes and her brows knit together like she was asking him why he wanted to look at her face.

“I love you,” he said and kissed her, pressing his lips into hers. “You deserve to hear that as often as you breathe.”

Her lips formed a line and a flat look spread across her face. “And yet I’m with you,” she said. Law frowned. She sighed and a soft smile spread across her lips. “Look, I know who you are and I love you as you are. Don’t worry about changing for me. I know that I’m somewhere on your list of important things.”

“You’re high on that list.”

“Mmhmm,” she hummed and started to sit up.

He laid her down and kissed her. He kissed her with everything he was, with all of his strength and affection. He tasted her like he’d never do it again. “I love you,” he breathed onto her lips.

She chuckled. “I love you, too.”

Law was out of sorts all morning. He stared into his black coffee begging it to do something to his energy levels. Maybe even serotonin levels. Although that had even less chance of happening. When he looked into the mirror earlier that morning it was like the first time he saw himself in years. 

He looked ragged, he looked exhausted. He looked like he was some long-forgotten pathetic shell of a man who had a broken heart and was grasping at straws to beg his lover to come back just once. 

Ugh, he needs to lay off Ruby’s trashy novels. 

It had been a month and a half, or he thinks it had been. Maybe longer? Time was such a blur as of late. All he knew was that he had figured everything out. 

He did it! 

The plan was in motion! Soon he would be on Punk Hazard! He would carefully move things along so that Doflamingo would never figure everything out. Doflamingo would be dead soon!

And Ruby…

And Ruby could come home . She would go to Zou and be with the people who loved her again. She would be surrounded by love and warmth and happiness. 

And more than likely not him, but that didn’t matter. He didn’t matter like she did. Someone like her could easily find happiness again. Her quick wit and her personality was wonderful and he knew anyone and everyone would be fighting just to hold her hand. 

Law huffed into his beer. So absolutely annoyed on Ruby’s behalf. Did no one have the decency to ask if she was actually interested in them?

“Law,” Ruby called with a smile. “Don’t look so annoyed for just me.”

“How do you not find it annoying? Isn’t it insulting they only see you as something to have sex with?”

She rested her chin in her hand with a curious smile. “Does it insult you?”

“Yeah.”

“Why?”

“Why? What kind of question is that? Because you’re smart, funny, and enjoyable to be around. You’re more than a damn vagina. You deserve better than these assholes.”

Ruby’s smile softened. “Thanks, that means a lot coming from the guy I’m sleeping with.”

Law breathed into his beer glass, the glass fogging up. “You’re more than that to me.”

Her smile grew. “Hm? What’s that? I don’t think I heard you.”

He shot her an annoyed look. “Don’t push it.”

She giggled. “You’re right, I’m sorry. You’re just fun to tease and I didn’t expect you to be a jealous person.”

“I’m not jealous ,” he scoffed, offended. “I am merely annoyed that you are being seen as an object.”

“Uh-huh, not even slightly jealous that people are hitting on your girlfriend and you can’t do anything about it?” He stared at her. “Alright, fine, you’re not jealous. You’re annoyed on my behalf that I’m being objectified even though I don’t give a shit.”

He huffed and chugged his beer in annoyance. Ruby hummed and sipped from her own glass, waving off another drink being brought to her. “Why don’t you give a shit?” He asked. 

“You have seen the way I dress, right? I know you stare at my ass. People treat women who dress like I do like they’re just an appendage. I’ve learned to live with it. I can’t start throwing punches because someone doesn’t respect me. I’d have knocked out half the population by now if I did.”

Law glowered. She didn’t deserve that. She deserved better. She deserved to be treated with honor and love and respect. “Maybe I should start throwing punches.”

She snorted. “My knight in shining armor,” she teased. “How about this? We head back to the Tang.” She cocked her head with a smile. “We can just put on our pajamas and go to bed! Nothing more and nothing less.”

“Rube,” he sighed. “Are you saying that we should go home and cuddle ?”

“Well, if you’re wanting to be specific, sure.”

He stared at her for a moment. “Let’s go.”

Law shoved his dinner in his face, chewing on the spicy, crispy tofu thoughtfully. He knew Penguin was staring at him. He knew that Penguin was staring hard at him. But what was he supposed to do? Just start a conversation? That would require him to be a pleasant person.

“How was she?” Penguin asked. 

“She had been drinking.”

“Was she drunk?”

“No.”

“Tipsy?”

“She had been but had sobered up.”

Penguin hummed. “And her mental health?” Law didn’t answer. “Did you ask how she was doing?”

“Didn’t need to. She was annoyed and asking stupid questions.”

“Like?”

Law glared at him and Penguin’s lips stretched into a thin line. “She asked if I loved her.”

“So she wasn’t annoyed, she was feeling insecure. And you obviously responded with “yes, of course. I love you more than anything else and can’t wait to see you again,” right?”

Law groaned and rubbed his eyes. “Does that sound like something I would say?”

“No, but a man can dream.” Penguin sighed. “Did you at least say that you loved her?”

“ Yes .”

“Well, at least you did that. I can’t imagine how she’s feeling right now. She’s at her worst when she’s alone.”

Law sighed. Knowing her she was probably only thinking of the bad things between them. The arguments, the times where she wanted to throw him into the ocean, the times he made her cry. “I know,” he said and stood up with his empty bowl. “She’s strong. She’ll get through it.”

Penguin stared up at him. “How many times are you going to say that?”

“Until it no longer needs to be said.”

“Rube,” Law called to her softly. 

Ruby jumped and started wiping her face quickly. “Oh, I thought you had gone to sleep.” She sniffed. 

“Did you think I wouldn’t notice you leaving the bed?”

“I…no?”

Law stared at her for a moment before sighing. He walked over to her and sat down on the ground beside her. He spread a blanket over her body. She was only wearing a nightgown meaning she got dressed in a hurry. He sighed and heard a wave hit the Tang. 

Law stared at the crescent moon and listened to Ruby’s sniffles. It was a clear sky and fucking cold. He knew Ruby must be freezing. 

“Why did you come out here?” She asked quietly. 

A confused expression grew on his face. “Why wouldn’t I?”

“I…I don’t know,” she said in a watery voice. “I’m not thinking. Of course you would. You’ve caught me crying on my own more than once and sat with me all those times.”

“And why are you crying now?”

She sighed. “Everything is a bit too real.” He stared at her. “I had a moment recently, a moment where I realized that I’m happy.”

Law narrowed his eyes at her. “And that makes you sad.”

She groaned. She leaned on him and he wrapped his arm around her. “I don’t know what to do with happy,” she said. “I’ve been miserable for as long as I can remember. I had accepted that I was always going to be alone and miserable. And then you guys showed up and you made me part of your crew and I’m suddenly forced to not hide away because I have friends who care about me for some unknown reason. Months later you tell me that you want to be with me, that you enjoy being around me, that you find me attractive. And that makes me happy .”

“O…kay?”

“I don’t know how to be happy,” she said and started to cry. “It feels wrong. Do I really deserve to be happy? After everything I’ve done and everyone I’ve hurt. Do I deserve to let people love me?” She wiped the tears that wouldn’t stop falling from her cheeks. 

“Yes.” Ruby looked at him and stared. “You don’t know how to be happy? That’s fine. I will be here while you figure it out. You don’t know how to be in a relationship? Okay. We’ll take it slow and go at whatever pace you want.” He sighed. “But you deserve happiness. You deserve to relax.” He sighed. “The crew loves you, I love you, so just breathe for a moment and let yourself be loved.”

Ruby wiped her cheeks. “That was actually really kind of you to say, Law.”

“Yeah. I hated every minute of it.” She laughed. She sniffed and wiped her cheeks. She let out a loud sigh with a smile. He watched her for a moment before letting out a breath. “Do you want to go back to bed?”

“Yeah, I think I do.”

He stood up and turned to her. He held out his hand for her. She stared at it for a brief moment before placing her hand in his. He pulled her up and into him, kissing her forehead as he did. 

Law was staring at himself in the mirror again. He looked sick and dehydrated. He looked pathetic. What would Ruby say to him? She’d probably take him by the ear and nag at him until he drank some water and rested. He could see her annoyed but very concerned expression. 

“I love you. I want you to be healthy.”

Law huffed. Right. Like that would ever happen. He’d always be too skinny. He’d always look exhausted. He’d always look slightly sick. And his always was coming to an end soon. There’s no way he’d survive this ordeal, no matter how genuine his promise to Ruby was. All he could do was make sure Ruby made it back to the Tang. 

There would be no one there to save him. No friend, no partner, and certainly not anyone who cared enough about him. Ruby would be the only one and he planned on tying her up and shipping her off the island before she got a chance to even think about arguing. 

Law rubbed his face and walked out of the bathroom. He stood in his bedroom, feeling lonely. She should be painting her toenails at the table, she should have a bowl of grapes to snack on, she should look so pretty in her grey shorts and white tank top. 

But she wasn’t here. She was in Dressrosa. She had left in order to save his life, and Law was starting to realize she set off on an impossible mission.

He sat on the bed and rubbed his face in exhaustion. His eyes thrummed in a sore pain, his head hurt as the beginnings of a migraine settled into his skull, his joints ached like he had just run a marathon. 

He truly had become a pathetic excuse for a human. 

He blinked when the den den mushi rang. Why was she calling so soon? 

He walked over to the snail and picked up the receiver. He breathed out. “Ruby?”

“Yeah,” she breathed. “I have information on Green Bit.”

Law’s eyes widened and he grabbed pen and paper. He took a deep breath and readied himself. 

“Go ahead, I’m listening.”

#op fanfic #one piece #x oc #lawxoc #law x oc #trafalgar law #side to side #ruby sela #sela ruby #sometimes when you're miserable you only think of the worst things #and sometimes when you're miserable you try to only think of things that bring joy #and they're both sooooooooooo miserable

[scorple]

Seen and Unseen

it's been a while since i've been on tumblr so i don't know if this is still a thing, but here's the first part of a series i'm writing that follows each (i think this first one is after 1-3). it's also cross posted to ao3 which I will link here if you prefer reading it that way

There had been many things over the last two days that Captain K.P. Hob did not understand, which was admittedly, par for the course when surrounded with such company as those who attend the Bloom. Fey are wanton and wild in the best of situations, but get them all together in the concentration of magic that marks the Bloom and it becomes something else entirely.

He is not suited for navigating his way though and over the cracks and crevices of courtly interactions. He is suited for the battlefield. He is suited to command companies of goblins in a way to please the rulers of his court. He is suited to follow orders. He is not suited for soft looks in the moonlight. He is not suited for gentle, caressing touches in wooded clearings. He is not suited for lov–

He cannot even think the word without the hollow feeling in his chest expanding ever so much more and threatening to break through his ribs.

Hob had thought, for a moment, there might be something more to him than following orders and then, occasionally not –though most often his givings in to rumpus and ruin were still steeped with buried orders and expectations to act more of his court and his station. That flame had been quickly snuffed when Lady Wuuvy had come to his quarters, no longer with the countenance of “Rue’s assistant” (Lord Blemish and Lady Boil had informed him of the missive from the Lords of the Wing and he couldn’t help but dig his claws into the palm of his hand in anger at the disrespect ) but with the bearing of a Champion demanding satisfaction and refusing to name his mistake.

But it was clear he had hurt Rue. He had done something to make them shed tears over him of all the fey gathered here at the Bloom. With no other explanation to go off of, he began to assume it was his bold acts of affection towards the Rue that had done this. He had hurt them by simply being interested in them.

It was not an easy thought to stomach, but not entirely unsurprising.

Where Hob did not always excel in the ways of the goblin court, he was even more ill-prepared to try his hand at the high society expected by the Court of Wonder and more so of the Mistrex of the Bloom themself.

Perhaps Lady Boil was right and he should not involve himself in the affairs of the heart when he had some many other things to accomplish. He was a fool to think he could fit into that world. A fool to think that Rue would return his bold affections. He was a soldier. He followed orders. He was a goblin.

You’re more than just a goblin .

The words had tortured him long into the night. Long after overhearing Prince Andhera and whatever was going on with Gwyndilyn Thistle-Hop which was a mystery that he was still working to unravel when not waylaid by the memory of Rue’s wrist under his fingers, the delicate strength he found surprising for a moment before he quickly released them.

They had laid out all his flaws, spoken them aloud to the emptiness of the forrest, and then had the gall to commend him for them. Flaws that had often resulted in harsh words and punishment within the Goblin Court. Flaws that he had done his best to hide through random acts of violence and trickery at the behest of his King.

These are good things. Maybe not for the Goblin Court, but they’re good things…for me.

He kept those words secret, stuffed down his throat, roiling in his stomach alongside a brilliant turquoise feather and buried beneath the knowledge that merely showing interest in them had moved Rue to tears.

Not for the first time preparing for and organizing the Bloom, Rue cannot sleep. They toss and turn, glamor dropped for the night, tangling their paws and feathers in the blankets until they give up on the idea of sleep entirely. They have so much to fix tomorrow and so little time to do it. They have to—

Frankly, nothing could have prepared me to believe that the words of a goblin would hold any weight with you.

Hob was wrong. It was Rue who was the fool. They were foolish enough to think that they could have anything more with Hob than polite greetings and trivial small talk. Rue doesn’t even know where, how, when this all began but their feelings for Hob—oh gods, feelings! —had done more harm than good. They had panicked, casting command on their best friend, the only fey who knew them in the ways that really mattered and loved them anyway. 

And Hob’s face. 

They had almost broken, then and there. Almost shed tears at the hurt scrawled across his features, unable to stomach the miserable pain they had caused to him and Wuuvy and—

I see that you struggle with battles that I cannot see .

He had seen them even without seeing them. The sincerity, the emotion in his voice told Rue everything they needed to know in the moment. It is well established amongst the fey that Captain K.P. Hob is always truthful to those he respects and Rue could tell that he did see them in more ways than one. Maybe it was a circumstance of kindred spirits or maybe they really were slipping as the millennia wore on, Rue wasn’t sure. The only thing they were sure of was that it terrified them.

Wuuvy had been perfect and kind and right as per usual. Rue wasn’t sure what they had done to deserve a friend like the one they had in Wuuvy. A true friend makes you brave when you don’t think you can be, lays out your mistakes with gentle care, helps you figure out just what you did wrong and helps you to fix it too. Wuuvy was the best of all these things.

If there’s no Bloom then there will be war and you know what that means for him.

It was shocking how badly that frightened Rue. How they felt their fists clench and their jaw tighten with the truth behind Wuuvy’s words. If this were the final Bloom, if this did affect the magic of the fey realms, there would be no question of a war, no preventing it from happening. Hob would—

He would be gone, fighting for his court. Dying for his court. 

The world would lose his particular salutes and the quality of his character amid a sea of half-truths and secret and power hungry fey who would do and say anything to gain more. It would lose the way a laugh seemed to startle him when it came bubbling out of his mouth, deep and warm. It would lose—no, confound it, they would lose…

Rue would lose him and the thought of it was almost too much to bear.

So they made their entrance, showed the courts of the fey who they really were, clinging tight to Wuuvy’s arm, feeling the weight of her challenge even without looking.

They were instead focused on Hob and his reaction to their revelation. Surprise—not entirely surprising if they were being honest—respect and honor, and finally…they were unsure of what to make of the final expression but if the squeeze of Wuuvy’s hand was anything to go by, it certainly wasn’t a bad one. They try not to smile when Hob stumbles over his own feet, catching a pocket dug slightly in the sand. 

I see that you struggle with battles that I cannot see .

Rue doesn’t stop the smile this time as they watch the rest of the Bloom react to their true form conscious of the stares and the murmurs and the judgment that would certainly spread.

Now you see me , they think, for what I truly am . And for once, they are not afraid.

Rue’s reveal is startling, to say the very least.

It is his own pride and his sense of duty that prevent him from making his way to them sooner. He still is unsure of his slight against them and decides treading carefully might be the best course of action. He doesn’t wish to cause them any more harm than he had already and if revealing his affections was the cause, he must keep his expression schooled and his guard up.

But gods, are they beautiful . 

Hob has never been one for fashion. He has the one uniform style and though he may have some different versions of it, the style remains as it is. A good soldier, a good captain, a good goblin. He thought Rue’s outfits had been elegant and eye-catching before, but to see Rue as they truly are, to see them relish in their own skin and still hold that air of elegance and status is quite remarkable.

Though their face and body have changed, there is still something he recognizes amidst their posture and poise. This is still Rue and for the first time he really sees them in totality.

He sees what they were holding back. He sees that buried under the calm and collected veneer is uncertainty and anxiety, that Rue is more like him than he’d normally care to admit—except in the dark of the night, sequestered in the trees and away from the pressures of the Bloom. They are both the odd one out in their courts, a piece of the puzzle that doesn’t quite fit unless you cut off bits of the edges and force it to go where it would not. 

He watches the young Prince of the Unseelie Court move toward Rue, watches as he takes their hands– paws into his own and speak quietly to them and does not even register that the Viscountess is no longer with him. The only thing he feels is a sharp pang of jealousy and a tightness in his chest. He strains to hear what is said but not even his goblin ears can make it out over the din of the Lords of the Wings’ entrance–which is still going on some 20 minutes later.

These feelings are strange and new for Hob. He knows, logically, that the Prince is most assuredly offering words of support in his quest for more friends–he sees the smile in Rue’s eyes and the relaxation of their posture as the two speak–but watching Andhera so bravely take Rue’s paws, watching them speak together in full view of the rest of the court, it fills hims with a sense of longing he thought previously impossible. 

He briefly touches the unsent letter tucked in the breast pocket of his uniform addressed to – The Mistrex of the Bloom , Delloso de la Rue – Rue and considers for the first time that magic is not the only thing that blooms.

#a court of fey and flowers #acofaf #battlemaster of ceremonies #captain k.p. hob #delloso de la rue #dimension 20 #fanfic #please let me know if it looks like shit on my blog lmao #these two got me in a death grip #honestly the whole show does

[barclaysangel]

"Light Showers"

Here it is! My very first Junior Wheeler/Lexy Cross oneshot! This one is INSANELY long, the longest oneshot I've ever written and I worked so hard on this, so I reeeeeeally hope you all like this! Please comment because comments mean the world to me!

Enjoy! :)

Word count: 8.3K

Warnings: Mention of underage drug use, mention of food issues/eating disorder, swearing, Logan and Chucky are warnings enough, not proofread because proofreading is for losers

Notes: Junior is biromantic asexual and a demiboy who uses he/they pronouns, Junior and Lexy are the main characters of this story and everyone else are background characters, a lot of Barclay-Wheeler/Final Family elements, very tiny hint of BarclayPierce, Junior is more in touch with his Filipino side

~You are the light I've been searchin' for forever~

Junior and Lexy’s relationship at first had always been rocky at best. 

Lexy was controlling and Junior let her be. He knew that it had to deal with their own issues of always obeying other people, particularly his father. So Junior did whatever Lexy wanted them to do. 

Well, mostly. Junior could never go further than making out despite Lexy’s insistence of wanting to do more. That was a discovery he would need to uncover later on on their own, his asexuality. 

There were also times Lexy would flirt with Oliver Hayden and it made their heart clench. Junior truly cared for her, maybe he was close to loving her at the time, but what the hell did they know about love? So he held their head down and allowed it, just like how he did in their personal life as well. 

Well, that didn’t last very long until Junior finally made the move to break up with her.

Ironically, it wasn’t because of Lexy’s controlling behavior or flirtatious nature towards someone else. It was her distance and all the secrets she was hiding from him. Junior hated secrets. And after just finding out about their mother’s cancer, his mind was far too occupied so they decided to end things with Lexy. 

He hated seeing the tears in her eyes but felt that was the right thing to do. 

Until Junior’s life fell apart. 

~Feels like, man, I've really never felt the rain~

Their mother, Bree, died right in front of him. 

Junior spiraled further into depression and was certain that they would have died by his own hands that night had Chucky not invaded their life and mind. 

Chucky planted the seeds in his brain to murder their father and eventually, he did. 

Years of anger, of pain, of conforming and destroying themself to be exactly what Logan Wheeler wanted him to be was released. Taken out onto their father’s skull over and over and over again by his own son to the point where he was almost unrecognizable. 

After that, everything seemed to go blurry. 

It was like Junior wasn’t in control anymore. Everything happened too fast and they continued spiraling, this time into madness, until it was too late. 

The knife in his chest that they took in order to protect Lexy was proof of that. 

And that was when Junior Wheeler died. 

~Buried in the desert, didn't think I'd push through the dirt~

Well, not entirely. 

Junior’s heart stopped for three minutes until the doctors were able to bring him back. They supposed he should send them a thank you note, but at that moment, they didn’t want to be alive. He just wanted to be with their mom. Or in hell. The latter seemed to be a more likely option since he was a murderer. 

But circumstances occurred that caused their true desires to be haltered. He escaped from the hospital a couple weeks after their near survival and landed in the woods. 

Practically dropped on Andy Barclay’s doorstep. 

And then it was them against the world, despite their rough start. But it became worth it and after some time, he began to feel almost like they were home with Andy. Junior opened up more as well, about his daddy issues and their somewhat tumultuous relationship with Lexy. 

Lexy…she was someone that he couldn’t get out of their mind. Despite being broken up, he still cared deeply for her. How could they not? He basically died for her. They remembered her crying as she held his bleeding body, begging them to hold on. But all he could do was apologize before their world faded to black. 

But late at night in the abandoned cabin he and Andy shared, when Junior was still awake with their mind whirling with too many thoughts, he would pray to every single Greek god they ever heard of for her to be okay. That’s all he wanted. They just wanted Lexy to be okay and for her to one day forget about Junior Wheeler and the harm that he caused. 

Please, gods, let her be okay. Junior Wheeler prayed while staring up at the ceiling that they were certain was growing mold. Just let her live the rest of her life in peace. Please make sure Chucky never gets to her again. Please let her find someone who can be whatever she wants them to be and have a family and be happy. Let her forget about the person who ruined her life by joining Chucky. Just…let Lexy forget about me. 

Well, he didn’t think the gods heard them that night. Because the following day, after a year, he saw Devon…and Lexy. 

~You just cleansed me like a waterfall, you came~

The moment Lexy saw Junior, she couldn’t take her eyes off them. He couldn’t blame her, they did make her believe that he was dead all this time. Besides, she wasn’t the only one staring. Devon was too although it didn’t seem to be as intense as Lexy’s. But even after explanations were given, she still wouldn’t look away. 

Junior would admit, it started to make them feel uncomfortable. He was never fond of staring, it always felt like when someone did stare too much, they were staring into their soul. Trying to find out every single secret from him so they knew how to tear them apart from the inside. Maybe that was what Lexy was trying to do. He wouldn’t blame her, they did deserve it after everything he’s done. 

Before their asshole side could come out and snap at her to ask if there was something on his face, Lexy suddenly reached out and placed her hand on their cheek. 

The abrupt motion made Junior stiffen and flinch away slightly before he quickly gave into her touch. 

Was her hand always this warm and soft? 

“Umm…what…whatcha doing there, Lexy?” They managed to ask her instead once he found their voice, now staring back at her. 

Wow…she still has those little green flecks in her eyes. He thought absentmindedly to themself before she gave her response. 

“You’re…you’re real…right?” It was an odd question, but it was something that was yet again not that surprising to Junior. 

She thought he was dead. Now they’re alive and well, with only a scar on his chest to prove their near death experience. Maybe she thought he was seeing a ghost or something. A ghost that somehow looked a little bit taller and had longer hair that was almost touching their shoulders rather than to look completely the same as when he “died”. 

Then again, what did they know of ghosts? There was a serial killer possessing a doll for over three decades, anything was possible. 

But instead of saying all of that, Junior just leaned into her hand and grazed his fingertips on her wrists lightly. “Yeah. I’m real. I’m alive, Lex.”

Calling Lexy by that nickname seemed to soften her more, relieved tears filling her eyes before she smiled at them. After what felt like forever, she finally pulled her hand away from his cheek. 

Junior would later find out that she asked if they were real because she started to do drugs. And when she was too high, she would sometimes hallucinate and see him. However when she wanted to reach out and touch them, he would disappear. 

It broke their heart knowing this but Junior still promised that he would help Lexy through her recovery. They would be by her side every step of the way. 

Once again, with ease, he fell back into the role of willing to do anything for her. 

Only this time, Lexy would do the exact same for Junior too. 

~I'm screamin' like a kettle on a stove~

After that, it was like Lexy couldn’t take her hands off them. 

Not that Junior minded, of course. He adored physical affection but had only really received it from their mother, so he had been fairly touch starved still. But Lexy wasn’t one to be so touchy with them. 

Sure, she’d hold Junior’s hand at school or kiss him in public sometimes, but that was it. They never cuddled or hugged or anything like that. But now, it was completely different. 

At first, Lexy would press her shoulders to theirs when they were standing or sitting close by. Then, it led to her looping her pinkie around his. That soon evolved to intertwining their fingers together when they held hands, hugging their arm, and resting her chin on his shoulder if they were sitting down. 

Honestly, it was adorable. Junior was seeing a different side of his ex-girlfriend that they didn’t even know existed. Even Devon and Jake looked confused by her sudden acts of affection toward their best friend and cousin. 

While it was incredibly cute, it just made him realize that she was perhaps just as touch starved as they were, maybe even more. 

That was something he had no problems fixing. 

Just about a week after they reunited, Junior noticed how fidgety Lexy was acting. Picking at her skin, shaking her leg, and they remembered that she was trying to go through withdrawal. So he allowed themself to finally return her physical affection. 

He moved closer to her and wrapped their arms around Lexy, pulling her into a hug. It took her a few seconds to hug him back but when she did, she immediately buried her face in their chest, right where his heart was–and subsequently, close to their scar. 

“You’re doing great, Lex. You’re okay. You’re gonna get through this, I promise. I’m not leaving you alone again. I’m here.” Junior told her and began playing with her long hair, twirling the blonde strands around his finger while their other hand stroked her back up and down soothingly. 

He could finally feel her starting to relax and Lexy’s grip tightened around their body as if he could disappear if she didn’t. She even moved her head just slightly so she could plant a small kiss on the pink scar that was hidden under their shirt. 

With how close Lexy was, Junior wondered if she could feel his heart racing. 

~You cranked the heat up, I was cold~

Junior had a hard time deciphering their feelings for his ex. 

On one hand, they genuinely still had an attraction to her. What he thought was an old flame was proven to be false the moment they saw Lexy again and that feeling only grew when he realized just how much she’s changed for the better. 

But at the same time, there was too much chaos happening in both of their worlds. With Chucky, drugs, and self-discovery, Junior felt it was too soon for them to get back into a relationship. They were hesitant to tell her this but when he did, she understood. Lexy just held their hand and reassured him that they could take it as slow as they needed to. 

“I’ll wait forever for you if I have to,” she told him with that sweet and genuine smile, “take your time. I’ll be right here when you’re ready. I’m not going anywhere, Juni.” 

Gods, Junior almost gave in and wanted so desperately to kiss her right then and there when she called them by that nickname that always had him so weak. 

But they did take it slow. They would still hold hands or cuddle, sometimes sleeping in the same bed, but that was it. And they were both fine with that, even with their so-called friends teasing them about their strange new relationship. 

It was a little odd, Junior would agree and admit to it. They didn’t say they were “dating” and they haven’t even kissed since the last year before they broke up. But Lexy didn’t press on it even though they knew that she did want to kiss him whenever they caught her staring at his lips. Junior was tempted too, but thought it was still too soon. 

This “arrangement” continued for a month until Christmas changed that far too soon. 

Ironically, it wasn’t mistletoe where they had to be forced to share a kiss to honor a stupid tradition.

It was Lexy covered literally head to toe in Chucky’s blood with a chainsaw in her hands.

Junior wasn’t sure what came over them. 

Although if he thought about it more, it was maybe just because the most beautiful girl they had ever seen was soaked in the blood of the piece of shit that ruined their lives and the lives of everyone they loved, with an almost maniacal look in her eyes after the deed was done. 

That must have been it because before he could stop themself, he went up to her, cupped her face in their hands, and slammed his lips on hers. 

Junior remembered the first time they ever kissed. Lexy’s lips tasted like her strawberry flavored lip gloss. 

This time, her lips were metallic with Chucky’s blood, some of it even dancing on their tongue from how intensely he kissed her. 

Junior was used to the taste of blood, having had some of it land in their mouth when he had killed their dad and tortured dozens of different Chuckys. But somehow, it felt different when it was on Lexy. 

Fuck, was he in love? 

When the dust settled and everything seemed to calm down after a few days, they both knew that they had to talk about this. 

“So…about the kiss…”

“It was the heat of the moment,” Junior admitted while fiddling with the zipper of their jacket, “but that doesn’t mean that I…that I didn’t enjoy it.” 

“Oh, I enjoyed it too,” Lexy giggled with an amused look in her eyes, easing the tension in her ex-partner’s chest, “I know we agreed to take it slow, and I’m all for that. But…do you think we could…do that again sometimes?” 

Junior smiled before nodding. There was no way he could go back to not kissing her again. He had a taste and knew they needed more. 

“Eh, I guess so.” He joked and she lightly swatted their arm with the back of her hand before leaning up on her toes, kissing him softly. 

This time, Lexy’s lips tasted like mint flavored chapstick and they could smell the hot chocolate that she drank earlier on her breath. 

Yeah, Junior could get used to this. 

~My past grew mold around my heart~

“No.” 

“Oh come on! Please?”

“No.” 

“I wanna see!” 

“No.” 

“Please?” 

“No.”

“Pretty please, Juni sweetie~?” 

“...no.” 

“Damnit, Junior, you’re gonna have to show me eventually!” 

“Like hell.” 

The banter that was occurring was out of Junior’s hands. Well, actually, the object in question that Lexy was so desperate to see was in fact in his hands. It was an object that had been taunting him and now they finally had to have it despite never wanting it ever in his life. 

Glasses. 

Junior Wheeler needed fucking glasses. 

They knew his eyesight was slowly getting worse over the last year or two. But they could squint and be able to see the words on a book okay, however the blurriness now grew more and more. Although it was easier for him to read something if it was further away from them. 

Stupid farsighted eyes. 

And now because of this, Andy finally noticed Junior’s predicament and insisted that he get glasses. Junior fought tooth and nail over this but Andy somehow managed to put his foot down and made them go to the eye appointment. 

And here he was, with glasses that made him feel like a fucking nerd. 

Junior was going to kill someone. 

Probably Jake because that asshole kept teasing them and was practically begging to be murdered. 

“Jun, I bet you’ll look so adorable!” Lexy insisted once again, now throwing her arms around his shoulders and leaning into them. “I just wanna see!” 

“So?” Junior spoke with no emotion. 

“Junior!” She now scolded before huffing. “Come on! I promise I won’t laugh or anything. I won’t even take a picture! Just…please?” 

He grumbled under their breath, not saying anything for a moment before he ended up giving in–just like they always did. He begrudgingly opened the case, pushed the glasses onto their face, and stared at her with the same deadpan expression. 

Lexy stared back at him before slowly smiling. “Juni! You look so cute!” 

“No, I don’t.” Junior groaned and was about to take the glasses off before she stopped them by grabbing his wrists. 

“Yes, you do,” she said stubbornly, “you look like Harry Potter!” 

They raised an eyebrow, seeming unamused. “Really?” 

She nodded her head quickly. “Yeah, but like, way hotter.”

Junior’s face flushed a bright shade of pink and he giggled quietly at the compliment. “Yeah, okay, sure.” 

“I’m serious,” Lexy whined and let go of their wrists so she could run her fingers across the circular frames, “you look super cute. Besides, now you can see me better so you can admire how hot I look too!” 

He snorted and rolled their eyes playfully. “My eyesight wasn’t that damaged, Lex. I just had a hard time reading up close, now I can do that.” 

“Then that means you get to read everything I post on Twitter about how you should be casted as the new Harry Potter.” 

“Oh gods no.” Lexy giggled at his reaction and then kissed the tip of their nose before standing up. 

“Wanna go to Starbucks?” 

Junior grinned widely. “Absolutely.” 

~And all my anger, sadness, regret disappeared~

Movie nights were a frequent occasion in their house. 

They had movie nights quite often, sometimes varying from twice a week to every single night. It depended on who was available to stay over and binge, also switching off on who picks out the movie each time. 

Jake’s turn was three days ago and Junior was relieved it wasn’t his turn again because it was far too soon for him to see another horror movie. 

Seriously, their lives were horror movies enough, they all didn’t need to watch even more of it. 

It was Andy’s turn this time but he was taking far too long on the phone with Nica in his room. Gods, it was so obvious that they were into each other and if Nica was in person, they’d totally be shoving their tongues down each other’s throats. 

But for now, they just had to wait for Andy to get off the fucking phone. So they sat around the living room, all talking about whatever was on their minds. 

Junior was sitting on the floor in front of the seat Lexy was on. They could sit on the couch with her but he was in an antsy mood and knew they would be moving around too much, so he settled on the floor instead. During the conversations, they felt Lexy move closer to him but remained behind them still. Before Junior could ask what she was doing, she ran both of her hands through his hair. 

The words died in their throat before they could even leave his lips, their eyes nearly rolling into the back of his head and they completely melted under her touch. 

If Junior tried to think about it, he would remember that they did tell Lexy earlier that morning that he enjoyed having his hair touched or played with, even scalp massages felt nice, and how it always helped relax them. But right now, his brain was completely mush. 

They could hear Jake and Devon laughing quietly at his reaction but they didn’t pay them any mind. Junior just allowed himself to be relaxed with her nails running across their head slowly, basically giving him a scalp massage. 

This must be what Elysium feels like. They thought to himself. 

Lexy continued doing this for a while, maybe ten minutes, until Andy came back into the room to start the movie. She pulled her hands away from him and Junior looked up at her with a pout. 

She giggled at the probably pitiful look on their face. “I’ll do it again after the movie, I promise.”

Even during the movie, Lexy was still playing with his hair. It wasn’t like the massage but she would still run her fingers around their hair, playing with it just like he would do to her own hair. The entire experience still made Junior completely relaxed, leaning their head on her knee so she can continue playing with his hair. 

And if Jake teased them about it later? 

Well, Junior would wait until he was agitated again so they could yank at his cousin’s curly hair. 

~It's madness, I'm not used to all this water, love, it's true~

Junior liked watching Lexy do her makeup. 

They weren’t quite sure why. Maybe it was because she was very precise in her work, completely focused when she was doing a winged eyeliner. Maybe it was the different eyeshadow colors she would use, sometimes darker and sometimes brighter, depending on the occasion. Either way, it was simply fascinating. 

Maybe too fascinating. 

“Do you think you could do my makeup?” Junior asked without thinking before completely shutting his mouth. 

Lexy had just finished applying her lipstick, a pretty shade of pink that almost matched her blush, before turning her head to look at them with an almost surprised look. “You want me to do your makeup?” 

Every single part of Junior was now screaming to abort, quickly shaking his head. “I–it’s–it’s nothing, sorry, forget about it–”

Before they could do anything else, Lexy was up, grabbing his arm, and pulling them to the seat she was originally on in front of her vanity. “Oh my god, I have been waiting for ages for you to ask me that!” 

“W-what?” 

“Juni, your face is perfect for makeup. Seriously, have you seen your cheekbones? And your jawline is to die for!” 

Junior began blushing deeply, making his ex giggle. “Well, I don’t even need to apply blush on you, so that’s one step out of the way.” 

“Lexyyyy!” They whined, blushing more as Lexy laughed softly and then grabbed a beauty sponge. 

He remembered calling it a clown nose before and she nearly threw her makeup bag at them. 

“Hold still, babe.” She told him and they obeyed, not wanting her to mess up as she began her work. 

The feeling of makeup on his face felt weird. It was a foreign sensation that a part of them enjoyed, while the other part wanted to stop. 

He knew what that other part was, the one that their father molded to be what he wanted his own child to be, a traditional masculine man. 

He hated that part of themself. 

“This isn’t weird…right?” Junior asked her, his eyes closed since she was applying gold sparkly eyeshadow on their eyelids that she let him pick out with the tips of her fingers. 

They felt Lexy falter for just a second before continuing. “No, of course not. I’ve always wanted to do your makeup. Besides, anyone can wear makeup. Doesn’t matter their gender or some other bullshit. Girls can wear it, boys can wear it, and anyone in between can wear it.” 

Her truthful response made them relax a little, opening his eyes to look at her after she finished their eyeshadow. “Yeah, you’re right. Sorry, I just…have that stupid voice in my head, you know?” 

She nodded truthfully, reaching to grab two eyeliner pencils. “I know, but you don’t have to listen to it. It’s wrong anyway, it’s just what your asshole piece of shit dad wanted you to believe.” 

Junior couldn’t help but to snort at how venomous Lexy sounded when she mentioned his father. Sometimes, it made him wonder who hated Logan more: them or Lexy. 

Probably Lexy now that he thought about it. 

Actually, Andy. Their guardian always looked like he was three seconds away from bringing Logan back to life only to torture him slowly and painfully whenever Junior talked about some of the things his father made them do, especially when it came to restricting his food intake. 

“What color do you want? Black or purple?” Lexy asked, shaking them away from their thoughts. 

“Purple.” He responded after a moment, finding the shade of darker purple nice to look at. 

Junior once again closed their eyes so she could draw the eyeliner onto his lower eyelid. It was harder for them to stay still during that part, the pressure of the pencil on his eye. It wasn’t unpleasant but it was certainly odd enough that they weren’t enjoying this process as much as the other ones. 

When Lexy finished, he opened their eyes again to see her grabbing mascara. “Okay, you gotta keep your eyes open for this one, Jun.” 

His eyes widened almost in horror and started shaking their head. “Uh uh, absolutely not, keep that away from me.” 

“Junior.” 

“I’m going to get stabbed in my eyeball.” 

“I’m not gonna stab your eyeball, I’ve done this a million times.” Lexy rolled her eyes in exasperation. “Your eyelashes are gonna look so fucking cute with mascara, so please hold still.” 

Junior groaned quietly before giving in, his entire body now stiff. Most likely not trusting that they won’t move, Lexy placed one hand behind the back of his head before using the mascara wand to go down and up their eyelashes. 

It took everything in him not to want to pull away, although they started to at one point but her grip tightened around him and she didn’t let go until she was finally finished. 

Lexy leaned back, looking at them almost proudly. “Fuck, you look so hot and you don’t even know it yet.” 

Junior snorted from her statement. “Does that mean I can see it now?” 

“No, not until we’re done. We just have one thing left,” she began rummaging through her makeup bag, “I think red would be a good color on you. Do you want to try red lip gloss or red lipstick?” 

He certainly didn’t feel like they were ready for lipstick, so he went with the former. Lexy pulled out the bright red lip gloss, carefully putting it on Junior’s lips. They couldn’t help but to stare at her as she did this, the way her eyebrows scrunched together with concentration and complete focus. 

Now that was fucking adorable. 

Finally, Lexy pulled away and clapped her hands together with a beaming smile. “Okay, okay, now you can look!” She told him excitedly and allowed them to look at the mirror. 

For a moment, Junior didn’t even recognize himself. Their eyes were glittering, his lips shimmering and face contoured and highlighted, noticing features in themself that he never thought to notice before. 

They looked…

“Pretty.” He ended up saying softly under their breath. 

Lexy dropped her chin on his shoulder, still grinning ear to ear. “Yeah, hella pretty. I told you, you have the perfect face to do makeup on.” 

Junior turned their head now to look at her, smiling softly. “Thank you for doing this, Lex.” 

“Of course, sweetie.” She told him affectionately with them leaning forward to kiss her but she quickly backed away. “Nuh uh, no kisses yet. I’m not letting you ruin my hard work, we’re taking at least a dozen pictures and then we’ll talk about kissing.” She insisted stubbornly, already reaching into her pocket for her phone. 

He rolled their eyes but knew that she wouldn’t settle on this. “Fine, but only because you did a really great job.” 

Lexy giggled triumphantly, quickly taking a selfie of the two of them. 

Junior would later notice that that picture she took would be on her lockscreen, and it only made his heart race. 

~But you made me want to~

Junior was exhausted. 

The weather was starting to get warmer now, spring hitting its highest, and the almost overbearing warmth was enough to make them tired. 

So he had gone to bed earlier than usual, with only one blanket on top of him because they would struggle to sleep without a blanket–believe him, they’ve tried. He must have been sleeping for a few hours, face down and drooling on his pillow while dreaming of two of the cutest kittens they had ever seen, before becoming slightly aware of the bedroom door opening. 

This still wasn’t enough to wake Junior up from his slumber. It was the feeling of a body climbing into their bed that finally jolted him awake. 

“It-it’s me, Jun.” They heard a familiar voice say next to him and they sighed softly, nodding and turning to face her. 

“Hi Lexy.” Junior said groggily as she shimmied under his blanket and curled up beside them. 

Of course it was her, this wasn’t the same time she had slipped into his bed in the middle of the night. Besides, they had done the same to her as well. 

“Hi.” Lexy replied with her voice quiet and almost shaky, as if she had been crying. 

That realization woke him up a little more and even though they couldn’t see her in the darkness of their room, he could still see her silhouette. They reached out carefully and felt wetness on her cheeks, gently wiping away her tears with his thumbs. 

“You okay Lex? Did you have a nightmare?” They asked her with a soft frown, still stroking her cheeks. 

Lexy sniffled and he felt more tears on their hands as she nodded. “I…I lost you. You died, Juni…you died in my arms and I–I couldn’t do anything to help you…”

Junior knew that this wasn’t the first time Lexy had nightmares about that night in the theater. She had told him before, it was a recurring nightmare she had when they were believed to be dead. 

“I’m here. I didn’t die, I pulled through. See?” He gently guided her hand to their chest, right where the scar was. 

He wasn’t fond of touching or even looking at their scar. Well, the first part would go out the window in moments where he was overwhelmed or upset, rubbing the scar because it felt like they were being stabbed again. But Lexy would often touch his scar or place her head on it, as if it was a reminder that they were alive. 

This method seemed to work because Junior could feel her start to calm down, lightly pressing her fingers on his chest. They knew that she could feel his scar even through their shirt, it was that noticeable. 

Lexy was quiet for a few moments before taking a deep breath and pushing her cheek against his chest. “If you ever die on me like that again, I’ll kill you myself.” 

Junior chuckled under their breath and decided not to mention the impossibility of that. He wouldn’t underestimate her, she would absolutely try if she could. 

“Go to sleep, honey. I’ll be here when you wake up. ‘M not going anywhere.” They reassured her, now rubbing her back with one hand. 

He heard Lexy hum in acknowledgement, keeping her cheek near their scar while fidgeting with his shirt by their waist. She continued doing this for a few minutes before finally falling asleep again. 

Junior smiled fondly when he noticed she was sleeping before doing the same not long after, accepting their fate to spend the night overheating. 

~Plan out my last days on earth, eating you~

There was a lot that Junior was still working through that his father implemented into their brain. 

That it was okay to be feminine, to take breaks, to cry, to wear whatever he wanted, to not need to change themself to be what someone else wants him to be. Just the basics, at least that’s what they saw it to be. 

But when it came to food, it was the hardest thing for his mind to work through. 

Junior still counted their calories, still sometimes slipping and asking Andy how much he was allowed to eat, hardly asking for seconds even though they did want more food. Thankfully, Andy seemed to know when Junior did want more and would always serve him more food without needing to ask them. 

Andy’s mother instincts were something he was still getting used to. 

But on good days, Junior could eat as much as they wanted without hearing his father’s voice in their head, even eating the occasional sugary and sweet desserts without much hesitance. 

However on bad days…he would barely eat. They would have maybe some snacks, or a fruit, but would throw himself into reading or writing or playing their guitar that he would genuinely forget about eating until someone reminded them. 

This week had been a bad week for Junior. He was lost in their mind and did what he could to distract themself. Unfortunately, that included skipping meals. But he thought that they had it under control. 

Until the day before when Junior nearly fainted in front of everyone after he lied about eating when in fact they went the entire day without eating. 

Now, he hadn’t meant to lie. It was a reflex when Andy asked them since he hadn’t been home that morning. He always said “yes” even if it wasn’t true. By the time they realized it, he didn’t want to go back on their answer. He figured that they would eat later on. 

That was proven to be false, of course. 

Junior would admit, it was a little scary. He stood up too fast and suddenly got punched in the face with dizziness and saw black spots over their eyes. He would have landed on the ground had Jake not been close by to catch them. 

His cousin and Andy were quick to get food for him, despite how embarrassed they felt. The embarrassment only continued when he noticed that they both were keeping more of an eye on him. All Junior could hope was that they wouldn’t tell anyone else about their little “incident”. 

Once again, the gods were not on his side. 

“Junior, I’m going to kick your ass!” Was the first thing Junior heard the next afternoon from Lexy, startled out of their reading and staring at her in both surprise and confusion. 

“What did I do this time?” 

“More like what you didn’t do. You seriously didn’t eat all day yesterday and almost passed out?! Are you kidding me?!” She nearly shrieked in frustration. 

He didn’t say anything for a moment before mumbling angrily under their breath. “I’m living with a bunch of snitching bitches!” 

Lexy stomped over to where he was sitting on their bed, snatching the book from his hands despite their protests, and replaced his book with a chocolate chip cookie that they hadn’t noticed she was holding. 

Junior went quiet, staring at it for a moment before looking up at Lexy. “I already ate breakfast, plenty of it. You can ask Andy or Jake, I’m sure they’ll attest to that.” 

“Oh I know that,” she started, “but I already decided to bring over cookies, there’s plenty more downstairs. I still want you to eat that.” 

He didn’t want to, their father’s voice kicking in the longer he stared at the cookie. They weren’t sure how long he was sitting there, staring with their hands beginning to tremble until Lexy sat down beside him and placed her hand over theirs. “What’s going on in that pretty little head of yours?” 

The phrase that Junior often said to his ex got them smiling a little, inhaling before speaking. “It’s just…been a bad week. I’m stuck in my head with everything my dad told me. I really really didn’t mean to not eat yesterday. I just needed a distraction and forgot to eat. I even lied about it, which really wasn’t my intention. I don’t want you all to be worrying about me.” 

“Juni, we’re gonna worry more if you’re almost fainting from not eating anything all day,” Lexy said gently, “if you’re struggling, you can talk to any of us. We’ll help you. You know that, right?” 

“I know,” he replied, “but we both know that me asking for help isn’t my forte.” 

“It’s not either, but I’m still trying.” She told them with a small chuckle, running her hand through his hair which caused Junior to close their eyes. “Now, will you please at least take a bite from your cookie? I’ll give you a kiss if you do.” 

Lexy truly was persuasive, wasn’t she?

And just like he always did, they gave in to her wishes. He opened their eyes and took a bite from his cookie–fuck, that tastes really good–, and after they swallowed the bite, he leaned in to kiss her softly. 

She kissed them back for a moment before pulling away just enough to breathe. “You taste like chocolate.” 

Her statement made both of them laugh before Junior said something. “Mahal kita.”

Lexy raised an eyebrow as she looked at him. “What does that mean?” 

Junior had been learning to speak Tagalog for the past few months. It was a way to connect more with their Filipino side and even understand his mother more. Learning the language felt like they were forming a bond with his mom, even though she was gone now. So far, the only other person who was trying to learn Tagalog as well was Andy. Well, Jake too, but he mostly wanted to know the curse words so he could understand if Junior was swearing at him. 

“It means ‘you’re sweet’.” They lied. 

Of course Junior had to lie. He couldn’t tell her that it meant “I love you”. That had to be far too soon, even though they had been together now for eight months, just without making it official. 

Besides, what Lexy didn’t know wouldn’t kill her. 

And she believed them too, smiling more at him. “That sounds so cute when you say it,” she told them truthfully before suddenly going serious, “but if you go an entire day without eating again, I will kick your ass. Got it?” 

Junior chuckled, knowing that Lexy wasn’t kidding or exaggerating, and took another large bite from his cookie. “Got it, Lex.” 

~The tips of your teeth fit perfect in me~

Lexy loved to go shopping. 

She could spend hours in the mall if she wanted to, spending money and splurging on clothes and makeup. 

As for Junior…

“I’m going to strangle myself with a hanger.” 

They had a raging headache. They both had only been in the mall for a couple hours, but Junior was bored and tired. He hated shopping even though they did know that he needed some more clothes–their style kept shifting and changing because he kept exploring their options–but right now, he needed a break. 

“Jun, we haven’t even been here for that long.” Lexy looked at them, seeming almost exhausted by his antics while holding up a red shirt to see if it would look good on them. “Come on, just a little longer.” 

“We can stay for another half hour as long as I can lay down on the floor.” He bargained. 

“Okay, that’s super gross and unhygienic. How about another hour, maybe a few minutes over, and I’ll buy you some food and coffee later.” 

Junior thought about it for a moment before nodding. “Fine, we have a deal.” 

They shook hands on it, both of them giggling before they went off to look at other clothes while also remaining within eye view of each other. 

They were still incredibly bored, browsing through different shirts and sighed loudly. He checked their phone and only five minutes had passed. 

It was going to be a long hour. 

Some time had passed, certainly not enough for Junior’s sanity, but he was managing to cope. A girl about their age even came up and started a conversation with him for a few minutes. She seemed kind enough and at the moment, they didn’t mind the company. 

Someone else, however, did in fact mind. 

Junior didn’t realize Lexy came back until she was almost right next to him. Before they could even greet her, she grabbed the collar of his shirt and slammed her lips on theirs with enough force that it made him take a step back. 

It was almost reminiscent of the passionate kiss they shared after Lexy killed her first Chucky. But this one was more rough, teeth hitting their own and he wouldn’t be surprised if she made their lips bleed. 

He almost struggled to breathe during the forceful few seconds kiss until she finally pulled away and looked at the girl they had been talking to. “Hi there. Who are you?” 

Uh oh. Junior knew that tone. It was the condescending, passive-aggressive tone she would speak in when Lexy was either pissed or about to say some of the most heinous things he had ever heard in their life. He hadn’t heard her use that tone in a while, so it did take them aback a little. 

He wasn’t the only one, the girl now looked nervous, stuttering over her words before coming up with an excuse to leave. When she did, Lexy stared daggers into Junior’s soul that had them nervous but confused as well. 

“Why are you looking at me like that? I should be the one looking at you like that! What the hell just happened?!” 

Lexy glared before spinning away on her heel and storming off. Junior was quick to catch up with her, his confusion growing. “Can you please explain to me what’s going on?!” 

“She was flirting with you!” She snapped and it had Junior blinking a few times. 

“What?” 

“I was watching you, she kept on flirting with you and you let her!” 

“Flirting with–no she wasn’t!” 

“Yes she was! I know girls and I know how they flirt, she was flirting!” 

“I didn’t know that! I thought she was just being nice!” 

Lexy stopped and whipped around to face them, a look of disbelief on her face. “You cannot possibly be that oblivious, Junior.” 

Junior threw his arms up in the air. “Yes! I can be that oblivious! Lexy, you were the one to ask me out on a date back in eighth grade. I didn’t even know it was a date until you told me! I thought you were just being nice and wanted to hang out with me. I can’t tell these things!” 

She stared at them even longer, running her hand through her hair with a look of pure frustration. “Are you sure that you and Andy aren’t actually biologically related? Because of how unaware you both are to women flirting with you has got to be a genetic thing.” 

“I don’t know, we haven’t taken a DNA test.” Junior replied lightheartedly, shrugging his shoulders before a lightbulb went off inside their brain. “Wait a minute…are…are you jealous?” 

Lexy seemed to flush red, her glare returning. “I was not–!” 

“Oh my god, you’re totally jealous,” he chuckled and a mischievous grin grew on their face, “I never thought I’d see you jealous before. Wow. I mean, I don’t mind it, but I’d appreciate it if you didn’t cut my mouth open when you kiss me due to your jealousy.” 

She was quiet, huffing under her breath. “If it makes you feel any better, I think I chipped two of my front teeth on yours.” 

They both laughed before Junior reached out to twirl her blonde hair around his finger. “You don’t need to get jealous, Lex. I’m not going anywhere. Trust me, I’m definitely not interested in anyone else. Alright? Mahal kita.” 

A certain look flashed in Lexy’s eyes but it was gone as quickly as it came before they could try to identify it. “What-what does that one mean again?” 

“It means that you’re really cute. That’s all.” He once again lied, feeling grateful that she didn’t understand Tagalog. 

She just hummed and nodded, making Junior smile. “Now, can we get out of here? I really am hungry and am in desperate need of coffee.” 

“You’re too obsessed with coffee,” Lexy rolled her eyes but giggled, “let’s go, we just gotta pay for these clothes first.” 

“Fine, just don’t get jealous of the cashier.” 

“Shut the fuck up.” 

~You're a shower of light I'd devour any day of the week~

Junior always struggled with remembering what day it was. 

They would blame the year he spent with Andy in the woods, away from civilization and only remembering the days from recent newspapers Andy would bring back on supply runs. Sometimes, the days felt like they were just merged together. Sometimes they would think it was Friday when actually it was Tuesday. 

God, maybe Devon was right. He needed to get out more. 

But it really didn’t matter that much to them anyway. If he wanted to know what day it was, they could just look in the calendar app on his phone. Simple and easy. 

But while Junior didn’t always remember dates, including important ones, imagine their surprise when he was woken up with their door slamming open and light turning on in his room. “Junior, wake up!” 

Lexy’s voice absolutely shot them awake, protective instincts kicking in and bolting upright and grabbing his favorite switchblade from under their pillow. “What–what?! What happened?! Is it Chucky?! Where is he?!” 

“Woah, Jun, relax, there’s no Chucky, it’s just me–...why do you have a knife under your pillow?” 

“I think the better question is why don’t you have a knife under your pillow?” Junior threw back before lowering his weapon, now a little more relaxed. “What’s going on? Did you have a nightmare or something? What happened?” 

She didn’t say anything for a moment before jumping up onto their bed and settling next to him. “Happy birthday, Juni!” 

They blinked at her, quiet for a few seconds. “...what?” 

“Happy birthday! It’s your birthday today, September 26th. You’re sixteen now!” 

Junior slowly turned his head to look at their alarm clock before turning back to stare at her in bewilderment. “Lexy…it’s 4:30 in the morning?! You couldn’t wait another six or seven hours to wake me up for my birthday like a normal person?! 

Now it was Lexy’s turn to blink. “Wow…Jake was right, you are really grouchy when you’re woken up this early.” 

“That fucker knew about your little plan?!” He hissed, already now coming up with a dozen ways to murder their cousin and pin the blame on Chucky. 

“Yes, but it was just because I wanted to make it special for your birthday since I missed your last one due to you faking your death!” 

“I did not fake my death, I was nowhere near as elaborate to fake it.” He grumbled, pushing their switchblade under his pillow and started to lay back down. But Lexy prevented them, grabbing his shoulders and pulling them back up as he groaned even louder. 

“C’mon, Jun, work with me here.” Lexy whined, something she didn’t do often but made her sound adorable whenever she did. 

Junior’s eyes began slowly closing. “Can I work on it when I’m not running on three hours of sleep?” 

“No,” Lexy insisted stubbornly before cupping their face in her hands and the action made him open their eyes again, “I need to say something first and you have to listen.” 

Her serious tone was enough to make him wake up more, raising an eyebrow. “Uhhh…okay? What is it?” 

Now, she looked nervous. Shy even. Maybe even anxious. They were looks that Junior certainly wasn’t used to seeing. 

“I…ummmm…uhhhhhhh…” 

“...are–are you having a stroke?” 

It took another couple minutes until Lexy took a deep breath, looked into their eyes, and spoke slowly. “Mahal, masaya ako na nasa buhay kita. Ibig mong sabihin ang mundo sa akin. Mahal kita.”

Junior’s heart stopped. 

He understood every single word she said. 

My love, I'm happy to have you in my life. You mean the world to me. I love you.

Holy shit. 

“W-what?” 

“Look, I know I butchered the pronunciations, please don’t make me say them again.” 

“No, it’s–it’s just…when did you…?” Now Junior was the one struggling to get the words out. 

“I started learning Tagalog a couple months ago,” Lexy admitted, “I wanted to surprise you for your birthday. I mean, I’m definitely not fluent yet, but I understand the basics. And I…definitely know what mahal kita means now.” 

They closed his eyes for a moment and sighed quietly before opening them again. “You…you knew at the mall…?” 

“Yeah, I knew. ‘Sweet’ my ass, Jun.” She teased with a playful smile before looking serious again. “Why didn’t you just tell me what it really meant?” 

Junior wanted to look down but her hands prevented him. “I…I didn’t know if it was too soon. Or if you were ready to hear it. But…I did mean it. I…ummmm…” 

“Are you having a stroke?” Lexy repeated their previous question with a smirk. 

Knowing that he deserved that, they chuckled quietly before finally growing a pair and saying it. “I love you, Lexy. I always have. It just took some time for us to find each other again. But I love you. Mahal kita, maganda.” 

“That last one means ‘beautiful’, I know because you say that one a lot to me,” she grinned and it made them both laugh, “but I love you too. It took losing you for me to realize that. But now that I have you back in my arms, I am never letting go again.” 

“Good,” He smiled at her, leaning one side of their cheek to one of her hands, “so…does this mean we can be official? Like…you’ll be my girlfriend?” 

“Just as long as it means that you’re my partner.” Lexy grinned, amusement yet adoration in her eyes. 

Junior could drown himself in her eyes if they could. 

“I would love that, Lex. I’ll be the best partner you ever had. I know I’m oblivious and kind of an idiot, but I’ll still be by your side no matter what–”

“Juni?” 

“Yeah?” 

“Kiss me.” 

“Okay.”

~Baby, cleanse me~

#Luna talks #admin #Chucky #Chucky 2021 #Junior Wheeler #Lexy Cross #Jexy #Andy Barclay #Jake Wheeler #Devon Evans #Nica Pierce #Barclay-Wheeler family #Final Family #oneshot #Chucky oneshot #Chucky fic #Light Showers

[cartoonfangirl1218]

More hcs cuz it’s my blog and I have a terrible memory of what I have or have not posted.

Specific nightmares that the couples comfort each other

Elena's worst reoccurring nightmare is that she is stuck in the amulet. Only the amulet doesn't belong to anyone, it's just a ancient artifact buried in the dirt so it's very unlikely that she will be released again any time soon. And in the amulet she experienced the same claustrophobia and isolation as before only with a clear image of Shuriki killing everyone she loves. Over and over and over.  Mateo's worst would be probably related to his dad or grandfather and failing. His worst would be like a vital moment in battle where he is supposed to do a spell and he just freezes, or messes up. Causing the battle to be lost and everyone dies, Avalor is brought to ruin and magic is banned once more. The guilt and shame eats him up as he thinks of all those who trusted him and believed in him, like Rafa and Alcazar and most of all, Elena and he failed them. Or alternatively his over-ambition causes the same results. 

Gabe's worst reoccurring nightmare would probably just him as captain leading his troops into a massacre. Simply having his friends and comrades dying is enough but being the one who made the decision that led to it..worse. Probably just to rub it in would be the familiar disappointed look in Roberto's eyes and then Blanca turning away from him too. For once not on his side.  Isabel's is very similar to Elena in that she is just stuck in an endless loop of seeing her parents death only it's worse. Since she didn't get to witness it, her imagination takes it to all the worse routes Shuriki could have done. Then always ending with an heart pounding chase where Shuriki is close to her heels, always closer and cornering her. 

Naomi's worst nightmare would have to be something like being ignored and cast aside while someone who is more qualified and royal than her takes her place as Elena's friend, and in the council. But the kicker would be that she is speaking but no one is listening, it's like she's invisible. 

Esteban's worst nightmare is depending on the big secret reveal. Pre-secret revel would be the family finding out about his secret and since we already discussed, their painful reactions of sadness, anger, confusion and betrayal at his treason. Compounded by the rest of Avalor shunning him. Pre/Post-secret reveal would be just the memory of him hiding like a coward as Shuriki invaded the palace, killing his aunt and uncle.  Doña's worst nightmare is being poor again. Alone and slowly painfully starving to death.

Favorite game Eleteo: A kiss off! No no I'm joking. Maybe tag or hide and seek. But no, not just any. But a magical version where they use their skills in order to find each other. There is also a lot of running and flying around as the two try to escape each other's grasp and tease the other. Of course, the winner gets a kiss and whatever they want but the chase is just part of the fun.  Gabenaomi: Olaball. Those two would have a blast running around trying to get each other's goal and showing off their sweet moves. Of course, it also involves a lot of tackling, shoving and joking around and the winner gets to choose the date or the number of goals is the number of kisses the winner gets.  Estenaomi: Charades surprisingly. They are very good at deciphering what the other is attempting to say. Like Naomi's odd looking "dance" is her playing Pete with an eyepatch and a monkey.  Gababel: Board games of any sort. Usually scrabble or some sort of monopoly that they switch off for more romantic questions or prizes.  Estoma: Pool. It can get pretty intense what with their need to destroy each other. It can also be pretty hilarious when they have a "no holds barred" competitions and try all manners of distractions and cheating so they can win

Who curses when they argue?  Eleteo: Neither. They very much prefer actually talking out their problems than yelling and screaming in anger at each other sinc that is counterproductive. Also I can't see Mateo having a cursing bone in his body and Elena wouldn't use that kind of harsh language to someone she loves.  Gabenaomi: Naomi. Blame the sailor's tongue but she can start cursing up a storm. And though Gabe tries not to do it in a girl's presence (yes, Mama Blanca drilled it in) he would start too. Gababel: Again neither. For the same reasons as Eleteo. 

Who wears the other clothes sometimes?  Eleteo: Elena sometimes wears Mateo's oversized shirts on a lazy Sunday morning without shame and sometime teasing that she should just wear it to her meetings. She also puts on wizards robes (Yes yes yes basically it's your fic. You are totally right in that Elena would put on Mateo's wizard robe. It's just so comfy and warm and smells just like him.) I couldn't resist. Gabenaomi: They don't really do that. Although Naomi has nabbed Gabe's guard jacket once or twice on a cold winter night at sea. As well as shirt:) She says he has to practice his ability to withstand cold temperatures but Gabe thinks it more has to do with his gazing at his pecs.  Gababel: Neither would. Just the size difference between them, it's ridiculous to try. Although Gabe's shirts make nice nightgowns lol Estebaomi: A few times, Esteban has tried Naomi's clothes on account of her dares much to Naomi's personal amusement. Naomi does the same and dresses in Esteban’s fancy suits and shirts. Usually for fun.  Estoma: Very rarely, though once Esteban went out in Doña's robe which he staunchly insists was a traditional Satu kimono. 

Who gives piggybacks rides?  Eleteo: Mateo tries to give Elena some but upper muscular strength isn't one of his fortes. Besides doing it with magic isn't the same. Sometimes Elena gives him some and there is just a lot of awkward fumbling, falling and laughter.  Gabenaomi: Uh Gabe duh! Oftentimes Naomi will come running and hop on Gabe's back when he least expects it and then insists on a piggyback ride to whatever destination. Or joke that he is like her own Fuego.  Gababel: Gabe again, but he is the one who usually offers to ride her around and makes it a fun bumpy galloping ride.  Estenaomi: Both. Naomi more often that not thanks to Esteban’s drama king ways on hiking trips or when he is sick.

Who arranges for a day off Eleteo: Elena arranges for special days off from work in the kingdom and work for the wizard so they could spend time together. Usually the dates vary between exploring the kingdom more, horse/Jaquin riding, swimming, picnics on the palace grounds, a day at the fireplace, fancy dinner and waltz. As long as they are together, they're happy. Elena is usually bounding with more enthusiasm and happiness than usual and Mateo just adores her smile.  Gabenaomi: Naomi does with some help from Elena to get Gabe away from Captain work, and they spend the day doing whatever comes to mind first. They tend to be more spontaneous in that sense.  Gababal: Once more, Isabel does since she can easily figure out a break in her schedule and see abiut guard duty. They spend more time at home, sometimes with one of their families just enjoying each other's companies and talking about their day. Also the occasional exploring. Who takes the covers? Eleteo: Covers? What covers? They go on body warmth alone. Lol. I don't think either would since it's more of a cocoon they wrapped themselves in but I'm going to go with Mateo. I feel like Elenais just more of a body person while Mateo can sleep with tons and tons of soft blankets and it reminds him of his wizard robes so it is extra comfy.  Gabenaomi: Naomi, she gets easily cold at night and likes to bundle herself up with all the covers. Gabe tries to shrug off, that he is too macho to get cold but sometimes he tries to tearing them away from Naomi's iron grip when she's sleeping and that almost made her fall off.  Estenaomi: Esteban!! The guy is a Duke, he is used to being a hundred percent comfortable. Forbid that he gets cold at night, it is the one thing he won't relent. He takes the covers he wants. Naomi usually wrangles it away but then she has to endure his complaints of how cold he is and equals it by lots of kisses. Gababel: Isabel take the covers. Moreover Gabe would gladly give it to her she use gets grabby when she's asleep so it doesn't matter if he gives it beforehand, she gets more and they end up hugging a lot. Most interesting date?  Eleteo: This is hard since I bet Eleteo had a lot of interesting dates but I'm going to go with the one where it was after they were married and just had Julian. They decided to take a night off to themselves and relax with a simple dinner. But Julian wouldn't stop crying unless he was in his mother's arms so they decided to take him to the restaurant. But they couldn't just leave Ana and Bianaca alone so they came with. It was a bit harder to have any flirtations when there are two toddlers around. Not to mention how Bianca wanted to look at all the pretty decorations and Ana wanted to hold baby Julian. So the night wasn't what they expected but it just reminded them how lucky they were to be having such a family, and how adorable it was to see the other parent.  Gabenaomi: It would have to be the time they almost lost the boat. They had went to the island from The Gecko's Tale but the rope snapped leading their boat out to the water. So they took a row boat and rowed to it until Gabe jumped out to garb the rope himself so Naomi followed and the two tried to figure how to pull it in since it was rather large. They managed to do it, and spent the rest of the date resting on the beach with a firm eye of the boat and talking about all the other things that could have happened like the return of Chiloya among others.  Estoma: They decided to pretend to be strangers meeting at a bar and get to know each other all over again. At first it was awkward with some patrons staring, and doing their best not to reference any past event or figuring if they were meeting as themselves or their teen selves. A few drinks in, the two forgot all that and tried to be themselves. It spiraled on to dancing in clubs, Esteban re-enacting some of his youthful adventures and the Royal treasury, she taught him to ride bareback and the next morning they had to explain why a majority of food was found staining the guest bedrooms.

Who feeds the other?  Eleteo: Both. Elena starts it at first in the beginning stages of the relationship since she is much more impulsive and Mateo is still very self conscious and aware of how it may appear to others. But then of course, he starts doing it too. Anything for his lady love.  Gabenaomi: Gabe feeds Naomi after giving up trying to stop her from stealing pieces of food. Naomi secretly thinks it's cheesy but she loves it.  Gababel: Gabe again. He loves Isabel. He would do anything and that means pulling all the stops and being a totally inner romantic just as Blanca encouraged.  Estenaomi: At first, Naomi does it as joke usually mixing in purpose to make fun of Esteban’s pampered upbringing. Then attentive, changed man Esteban would do it similar to Gabe.

Who plays footsie? Eleteo: Elena!! Elena, Elena, Elena. She can't help herself. She loves to show any kind of affection to her boyfriend/husband and will mischevious do it under the table if need be.  Estenaomi: Esteban, he is such a flirt and knowing him, he woudkd do it when he gets bored at meetings. Or sometimes he would do it just to get Naomi distracted.  Gababel: Isabel. She's like her sister in being more public about her affection. Just because he has a reputation as captain of the guard doesn't me she particularly cares.  Gabenaomi: Naomi to Gabe. Similar to Isabel, she doesn't care that Gabe has a reputation to live up to and just wants to be with her man. Also she's mischevious in that sense too.  What kind of couple class would they do together?  Eleteo: I feel like cooking (??) Totally unimaginative but there is a certain domesticity with cooking. It's a nice break from their crazy, magical work a day lives. Plus it gives plenty of opportunities for food fights, finger licking and food sharing. Gabenaomi: Mountain climbing. Can that be a couple class? I feel like it would be a good couple class for them. Working out, adventuring and sharing trust at the highest height possible. Estenaomi: A dance class of some sort. If it was a modern AU, probably hip hop. Delivering every move with grace, style and a hint of the heat between them.  Gababel: Yoga. It combines the use of Gabe's muscular strength and always being there to lift up and catch Isabel while Isabel calculates the bets way to get into position without straining any muscles. 

Estoma: Pool. They get extremely competitive trying to distract each other.  Who slips innuendos?  Eleteo: Elena. Because she can and she doesn't mince words when it comes to how much she loves her husband in every sense. Usually when she's bored or in a particularly flirty mood. Mateo does too but he'd rather do that in the privacy of his room.  Gabenaomi: Naomi. She had heard quiet a few from days in sailor bars and often conveys them to Gabe especially after he comes from home after battle or on their dates.  Gababel: Neither really. If it does happen it would be accidental or out of context. But I can't really see it happening.  Estebaomi: Is this a question, Esteban. Only he would think his are incredible witty and charming and sexy.  Not the result all the time but when it falls flat Naomi just laughs and shakes her head at his attempts.

#elena of avalor #eleteo #gabenaomi #estenaomi #estoma #gababel #my hcs #my headcanons

[lifblogs]

The Devil in You

Whumptober 2022 @whumptober-archive NO. 7 THE WAY YOU SHAKE AND SHIVER Shaking Hands | Seizures | Silent Panic Attack

Fandom: Supernatural Rating: Mature Pairing: Implied Non-Con Samifer Word Count: 1344 Summary: During Sam's mental health stay after the events in the beginning of Three Birds, One Stone, another patient triggers a panic attack in him. READ ON AO3

Sam had dumped his lunch into the trash (he’d waited till lunch was over and a nurse or occupational therapist wasn’t around so they would think he was eating), and was just bringing the empty tray back to the nurse’s station when one of the older men also in this unit with him grabbed his arm. Sam turned, expecting an attack, pulling himself out of his surprisingly strong grip, and held the dark red tray in front of him like it might be a shield.

Before he could say anything, the man, now wide-eyed, was pointing a finger at him.

Sure, maybe Sam could ignore him, go on with his day, try once more to find a way out of here, but for some reason, the way his dark eyes held him kept him captivated.

“You’ve got the Devil in you, boy.”

Sam opened his mouth and tried to say something, but nothing came out. He swallowed, and licked his suddenly-dry lips.

He thought maybe his heart had skipped a beat or two.

“Wh-what?”

“You’ve got the Devil in you,” he repeated.

Sam wanted to snap at him, maybe as an attempt to hold back the fear that lived in him constantly, the fear that was always ready to spring.

I did, but not anymore!

Yet he had his mark on him, his hand branded into his skin while he’d slept during his horrid stay on the lower floors of the hospital in one of the medical wards. It was a reminder that Lucifer knew exactly where he was, knew that he was alive, and that he could come for him at any time.

“Leave me alone,” Sam got out, wondering if this man was truly mentally ill or if somehow he knew who and what he was, knew he had been touched and violated.

Sam tried turning away, but the man grabbed his tray.

“Hey!” Sam exclaimed.

“You’ve got the Devil in you! He’s got the Devil in him!” he started screaming, accusing.

In moments, the man was trying to attack him, still screaming. Even with the extensive scarring on his back, and the stiff joints in his hands, Sam held him at bay. Even as he felt a tremble building up in the base of his spine.

Nurses came, trying to diffuse the situation. A security guard had to grab the other patient. Freed from the grip of his awful accuser, Sam backed away, nearly collapsing against the nurse’s station, finding that his knees were all wobbly, like they’d turned to Jell-O.

The man continued to yell, truly angered and terrified.

Hands shaking violently, fingers suddenly weak, the tray fell from his grip.

He tasted blood on his tongue, felt pressure that quickly turned into pain deep in his body.

Lucifer was pressed against him in Castiel’s body, buried deep in him. He was growling in his ear that he was his to do with as he pleased, that Sam was made for him.

Dean was screaming.

The tremble released itself up his spine, scraping along each and every muscle. It beat against the rhythm of his panicked heart.

Sam couldn’t feel his hands, his chest hurt so badly he thought he was going to die.

The brand on his chest burned, down through the layers of his skin, through muscle, through nerves and bone, down to his scarred soul with wounds that were still raw and bloody.

“No. No, no, no, no, no,” Sam breathed.

There was a nurse in front of him, he thought, but all sounds of her voice were muffled, like he was hearing it through water.

Sam looked around wildly, needing a place to hide, to lock himself away from the world till he was clean, to lock himself away from Lucifer.

He was here.

Wasn’t he?

He felt his touch, heard his voice.

Dean was by his side now, had rushed over from where he’d been sitting and stabbing a notebook angrily with a pen. His rectangular-framed glasses had slid down his nose a bit.

Dean tried to hold Sam’s trembling arm, but Sam pulled out of his grip.

Fuck, he was going to be sick.

Sam lost all feeling in his body, thought maybe he wasn’t real.

He’s got the Devil in him! He’s got the Devil in him! Evil! Evil! He does!

How could he be real when he couldn’t breathe?

He thought maybe he heard someone gasping and panting, like their lungs were begging for air, but that couldn’t be him, right?

He thought maybe someone was calling his name.

Sam blacked out.

~~~

Sam came to with a splitting headache, and a burning at his chest. He tried to cry out, putting a hand to his head. His motions were sluggish. But he felt calm, almost. Something pulled at his chest. Tape?

Feeling groggy, like the world around him didn’t make much sense, Sam pulled his T-shirt to look down at his chest. There was a fresh bandage on it, held there with tape. Already it was a dark pink with blood.

What happened?

Sam began to realize that he had been conscious when he’d blacked out.

Had he done this to himself?

It made sense. Before, while aware of himself and his surroundings he had tried to claw or cut the brand off of him. He’d actually once used a project he’d done during an art therapy session. They’d painted on clear plastic, coloring in the divots and dips that made a picture of a rising sun. While alone he’d broken it in half to make a sharp edge. When that had been taken away, he’d discovered with careful work that the plastic comb each patient was given could be used to cut his skin.

There was some blood under his fingernails this time though.

Had he been clawing at himself? What had he been given? His right bicep was a little sore, like he’d gotten an injection.

There was a knock on the door and then a nurse came in.

“Hey, Sam, how are you feeling?”

“My head hurts,” was all he could think to say.”

“I’ll get you some pain meds. Ibuprofen okay for you?”

Sam nodded, and then rested back against the bed. God, he was sleepy. Which should’ve made him panic because now he wouldn’t be able to fight if Lucifer came.

Really, how could he fight the Devil on a regular day though?

It was as if his reactions were being repressed, like everything inside his body was being pressed down and kept at bay. It felt kind of nice, actually, which he wasn’t sure was something he’d ever tell Dean.

The nurse came back with a paper cup, and a smaller plastic cup, one with water, one with a large, white pill.

Sam sat up and took the medicine.

“Sorry about your headache. Haldol can do that sometimes,” the nurse said.

“Haldol…. Was—was that what I was given?”

The nurse nodded. “We had to, unfortunately. You were hurting yourself.”

Sam apologized, but wasn’t entirely sure why.

“Do you want to talk to your therapist you have for the night shift? From what we can tell, you had a panic attack.”

“I think I blacked out.”

“Yeah, that can happen sometimes.”

Sam thought about it, but decided—even in his more agreeable state—that no, he wouldn’t want to talk to anyone. Only Dean would know, only Dean would understand.

“Can I talk to my brother?”

The nurse seemed to resist making some sort of facial expression (probably a negative one, then), but he said that Sam would be allowed out of this room if he promised he wouldn’t hurt himself, or anyone else.

Sam promised, and said that he was all right.

One of the many, many lies he told in here.

Walking carefully, headache still pounding right above his eyes, he went to find the only person who would understand his pain, the one who had been through it all with him, and suffered by his side.

And hopefully, Lucifer wasn’t on his way.

#whumptober2022 #no.7 #shaking hands #silent panic attack #spn #fanfiction #trauma #panic attack #eating disorder #body memories #tactile hallucination #implied/referenced rape/non-con #self-harm #drugging #mental hospital #nsfwhump #spn fanfiction #sam winchester #dean winchester #writing #my writing

[sticksbatnix]

“Tell me, Stewart, do you know what it’s like to be a criminal?”

Ghoul stopped writing in his notebook, he took a glance at the older man before going back to his work.

“Sure, I do, that’s what I've been doing for the last couple of years, no?”

“No, you’ve been reckless for the last couple of years, you weren't a criminal, you were being a child.” Raising a vile to the light, the doctor examined the contents from within before putting it down with the rest.

“A child committing acts of rash decisions, all for the thrill, all for a laugh, all with no rhyme or reason.”

Gathering a canister, the older man cleaned it out from the opening before taking it off. He quickly grabbed a vial and poured the contents inside, just as he did that he poured another concoction before closing it entirely.

“Then what did you do all your life, “Ghoul found himself asking before quickly shutting his mouth.

There was a slight pause given by the rogue, a slight twitch from his head before he returned to his work.

“I, “the man said through clenched teeth, “was proving a point, giving others a look into their deepest fears, showing that life is meaningless without it.”

He turned over to fill the next canister with chemicals.

“I was showing the world the true meaning of fear right until the very end.”

Ghoul watched as the man nearly slammed the canister down before he paused midway and softly placed it along with the others. If he could breathe then he would have taken a deep breath in and out but that was already a task too far to reach.

“So, that is why this generation disappoints me. You children never have a good reason to turn to crime other than to have a kick out of it. Meanwhile, those who have reason are pushed down and never resurface, much like my work, it's buried and forgotten by complete ignorance.”

Another canister was put down.

“Another gang of Jokerz, another group of teenagers, another round of children searching for a way to release their anger in predictable ways. I can see it in you, Stewart, through a rich and famous family you’ve managed to get out and dress up as you do. Go wild and destroy for the fun of it that soon dies down the more you commit to it and before long, you’ll have nothing left that’ll faze you.”

Ghoul didn't move, feeling his throat close up he slightly slouched on his chair, hands gripping the desk to gain some leverage.

He wanted to say something back, maybe tell the man off that he was wrong and there was more to his rebellious nature. That embarrassing the Winthrop name was worth it, to show that even the highest of the high would be nothing in the very end!

But, his heart ached in his chest relying on those said answers, the same excuses he gave to the detectives when he was caught. The empty jail cells he’d sit in with little to no visitors apart from self-proclaimed therapists and a certain bat.

He has been more reckless in his crimes, hasn't he?

Stealing wasn't enough for him, the thrill wasn't as perfect as it was from the beginning.

How much would it take before he finally put a bullet through a man’s head just to feel something?

Not long he’d guess but he’s never killed anyone before, at least, not directly. He's never seen the aftermath of his or the other’s crimes; it was all about making a scene, no more no less.

“Don’t think I haven't gone through it before, I've faced the same problems as yours, but it was with my toxin.”

Trailing their work off to the side, Ghoul put his full attention to the rouge.

“How?”

“Much like yourself, I grew reckless in my actions against the Dark Knight and all those who opposed me. Using my fear toxin for my experiments often landed me in the battle. I would often see apparitions of what I had feared for so long and reduced myself to a coward, almost like a child.”

He paused.

“And then, one day, when I faced Batman and was once again in the line of fire from my creation. I suddenly found myself empty, like how I am now, hollow from the inside as the gas-filled my senses and distort my vision. The nightmares then became nothing to me, my heart did not beat as fast as it did before, and my excitement got the better of me.”

Another pause, gloved hands grasped the work desk, head hung low with strands of hair falling about.

“I wasn't afraid anymore, “he whispered with a raspy voice, “I had become numb to my creation.”

“No more fear, no more shivers in the dark, no more heart-pumping scares, no more mind-altering visions, and no chance to relive what had made me since the very beginning.”

Ghoul stared on, work long forgotten, he watched the man slumped in his chair, taking off his hat in the process. In his defeated stature, they furiously ripped the gloves off their hands and buried them on his face. Dragging down what skin had been left on along with their mask, the corpse simply gave in to the realization once more like many times before.

“Even in death, I cannot feel fear since the heart that has resided within me has stopped and dusted to no return. My veins shriveled and thin without my blood. My toxin cannot flow freely without a pump. And my brain has been reduced to nothing as my soul carries on this useless hollow shell of what I’ve once been.”

Without realizing it, Ghoul stood up and walked over to the man, eyes filled with worry.

“Yet, you still go on, “the teenager found himself muttering.

“I do but that's because my work has yet to be finished, this ‘Neo-Gotham’ must face their greatest fears, and that BAT-” Immediately, the corpse raised itself, towering over the flinched teenager they soon calmed down.

“That...Bat will pay for what they’ve done to me.”

Thin hands then grasped Ghoul’s shoulders, a slight pressure was built and even through his clothes, Ghoul could still feel the cold.

“I may not have much time left in this world, but with that little time, I’ll dedicate my time and effort to teaching you my work. Neo-Gotham will have another Scarecrow as it has another Batman and another Robin and so on.”

Against his will, Ghoul was brought closer, unmistakably watching the details of the man be examined up close.

His white eyes, his jagged teeth, his misshapen burlap face, thin black hair, and that occasional wheeze of breath given by a man who couldn't do such a thing.

The smell wasn't the problem, by all means, the chemicals may have damaged Ghoul’s nose more than it should have.

“Will you help me, Stewart? Will you help me continue my work as well as show Neo-Gotham their greatest fears? Will you help me continue with the Scarecrow name as it should have long ago?”

What made these questions different from the ones before?

Was it because they were of high importance that they needed to be said and given to someone that really mattered?

Was it because it came from the actual man that Ghoul had only seen history cubes about late into the night when everyone was asleep?

Was it because if he had said no then this man would have the power to drag him to Hell for punishment for leading him on over these past few weeks?

What was it?

What was it, Stewart?

“Yes, “he finally said, “I’ll help you.”

He wasn't a child anymore, unlike his mother, he will find a way to make his life worth living.

#batman #batman beyond #btas #batman the animated series #tnba #the new batman adventures #batman beyond ghoul #stewart carter winthrop iii #scarecrow #the scarecrow #btas scarecrow #btas jonathan crane #jonathan crane #first post #my writing

[strawhatsoraya]

Yay for open requests <3

I want to request a reader x Levi fic where reader is Erwin’s s/o and good friends with Levi. They know what happened, bit want to hear it from Levi in person. Levi thinks reader hates him, but reader instead pulls Levi close, kisses him on the forehead and gives him a big hug. Just tells him he did the right thing and tries to take the guilt away.

Just want Levi to be ok for once. gn!reader is fine

Hello! I know it's been a while, but I haven't forgotten about requests and yours is done! At last lol. I kept it GN! Reader, so there are no pronouns. I kept it short and sweet. I hope it brings you and Levi comfort.

Guilt

Levi x GN Reader / NO PRONOUNS / SFW 636 word count

He had been avoiding them. It was selfish, he knew, but to drag his feet was all he could do. The pain of loss was not new but what he carried in his chest was an entirely different beast. Even now, he missed him. Even now, he wished he was there, sitting in his office surrounded by papers. Even now, he wished he could ask him if he made the right choice.

It was stupid; senseless. There was no point in drowning himself with these thoughts, running scenarios in his head that will never come to be. 

It was done. There was no turning back, but still, he wasn’t sure.

So he avoided you some more, even when he thought he heard your voice around the corner of a hallway. 

It isn’t until Hange convinces him to stop running, to finally face you and give you the closure you need and deserve, that he agrees.

And so now he sits next to you, wind blowing gently through his hair, with silence cloaking both your shoulders. 

He doesn’t know where to start. You asked him what had happened. His mouth dries, and so he licks his lips repeatedly, dying for any kind of moisture. He explains it, determined to keep his voice even, and doesn’t realize how clinical his description may sound. Realization dawns when he notices how deep your frown is. A sigh floats past his lips, and he massages a knot on the back of his neck.

“I’m sorry,” he manages to mumble as guilt blooms in his chest, thorny vines wrapping around his sternum and squeezing, taking the breath from his lungs. He looks up at the pink and purple sky, painted lightly by the sun as it goes down. “I thought I did the right thing.” He thought, but he wasn’t sure. 

Erwin had fought the hell they lived in, day in and day out, with every fiber in his body. Every thought, and every dream and hope was focused on discovering the truth, and acquiring freedom. He had sacrificed his life for a dream that he would never get to see. Levi could have breached the impossible–give him one more chance, if he wanted.

Then why didn’t he? On a selfish belief that Erwin would be better off dead? That he would finally be free and would be able to be at peace? That he wouldn’t have to wake up every single day and wonder who he was burying next? Wonder whose parents would he have to apologize to for leading their son or daughter to their death?

He thought he did the right thing. He was certain of it—then why didn’t it make the pain better?

His eyes find yours, an apology gurgling in the back of his throat. If he apologized enough, maybe one day you would stop hating him. He expects you to scream at him, to drag your nails down his face cursing his name. He expects your anger, your rage, your tears. He did not expect your hands, warm and soft on his cheeks as you pulled him close. He did not expect your lips on his forehead, holding for seconds until your warmth spreads. He did not expect the release of his heart, how suddenly he felt he could collapse. 

You hold his frail body against yours, tightly, just as he felt close to tears. Your hands draw big circles on his back.

“It’s okay,” you whisper to the top of his head. He feels droplets of water on his head. He pretends they’re not tears. “You did the right thing, Levi. It’s okay.” His hands tremble as he brings them around your waist.

You hold on to each other like that, for several minutes, as the sun goes down; until guilt disappears in the horizon.

#fic request #levi x y/n #levi x reader #snk levi #aot: levi x reader

[pseudonympls]

faerie bo has me acting unwise 😩 imagine a tam lin type of story but make it actually really dark.

imagine getting lost in the woods. the sun is already setting. you're not sure how long you would need to be gone for someone to come look for you. you worry about it for only a second before you hear the voice and all your thoughts sink into nothingness. you have no choice but to follow, deeper into the forest.

and then, suddenly, there he is. like something out of a fairy tale, singing to you, entrancing you. before you know it, you're on your knees before him, begging for his cock in a voice that comes out of your mouth but that you know isn't your own. he fucks your throat, and you gag and choke, but you have to take more. his moans are like his song, and you have no choice but to obey everything he says.

you don't fight him when he peels away your clothes, or when he shoves his fingers into you. you don't say a word when he makes fun of how wet you are, what a weak-willed, pathetic little thing who fell for his tricks so easily. he sinks into you, finally, and you sob. if out of pleasure or pain or anger or fear, you don't know. he's too big, you shouldn't be able to take him, but you do, and your fuzzy, clouded mind doesn't even dare think about whether you want this or not.

he releases inside of you, probably more than once, because fae are blessed with far more stamina than humans, and tells you you deserve to be knocked up like this, that really it's your own fault for falling right into his trap.

maybe he takes you with him after this, to show you off to the court, so you can cockwarm him as he sits there and watches the rest of the fae celebrate. you barely even know what's happening at that point. all you register is his cock buried deeper in you than you thought possible, and a hundred other spirits dancing about, signing their strange, wild songs that make your thoughts sticky like tar and elusive like fog.

at some point, you pass out, and when you wake up, you're alone, clothed in a green dress made from a strangely-textured fabric. you can see the end of the woods from here, and you leave as soon as possible. it must have been a dream, you tell yourself, but the ache between your legs tells you otherwise.

and bo waits in the heart of the forest, knowing that, even though you're running now, you will return the second he calls for you in that ancient, enthralling voice of his...

...anyway, i may have a problem 😅😩

😳😳

Anon, if you have a problem then so do I lmao 😳🥴

I actually had a fic idea about shapeshifter!Bo based off one of my favourite albums - The Hazards of Love by The Decemberists, that is deeply rooted in folklore and such - I also had a Crane Wife WIP at one point where OC was an injured crane that Bo helped heal and ofc she is a shapeshifter of sorts as well 🙈

What can I say, I just love fucked up fantasy tragedy 🫠

#help #anon you’re fucking with me #u and me fae!bo fic collab when?! #answered