#bc i did not have anywhere near my normal dexterity. it was awful.

[orcelito]

I wonder how mentally tortured I have to look to be let off the hook lol

#speculation nation #i am. hm. #so like there was the intense pain spell yesterday that made biking home Agonizing #where all i could do was push myself home with the mantra 'home has the hotpad' #where it was so bad all i could think about was my pain to the point where i feared going anywhere near cars #bc i did not have anywhere near my normal dexterity. it was awful. #about 2/3rds of the way home tho i heard random resounding booms #which triggered the classic american experience of 'is that gunshots or fireworks?' #that was the only time i thought of smth other than pain. bc i was Afraid. #figured out i was hearing them Behind me and proceeded with caution. i ended up fine. #but it Really disturbed me when the whole situation with the active shooter at MSU was developing #i spent. way too much time last night refreshing twitter for any kind of updates at all #the situation isnt good but it could definitely be much worse. #but for me personally. having just wondered if there was a gunman around & then there actually Was in a separate part of the world #(not Too separate. michigan is indiana's upstairs neighbor after all.) #it's disturbing. and yet i have to go to class like nothing happened and then go to work to do the tips distribution #i just want to remain curled up in my bed with the lights off. is that too much to ask for #negative/ #gun violence/