#but i just spent over two hrs on this probs so its getting jetted into the internet ether

[quiveringdeer]

so I took a nap with my cat, but since I woke up I haven't been able to get the above observation outta my head. And dunno how to make it into a character post so figured I'd just share here. 

This started as a long-winded scene idea I was typing up in dms to @marleysfinest after they commented about reading about Reiner cursing in that silly incorrect quote post I made where Pock pushed him down the stairs--just hit real different. And I couldn't agree more.

But instead of becoming the filthy smut I was originally trying to get at, my weird as fuck brain created this spiral of I don't even know what! It's highly self indulgent self insert as Reader. (I mean isn't that what we all write these as?) Though I did try to curb some of my more ridiculous dialogue options I initially intended to use.

Anywho, before the fluff and silliness have some meta musings:

Definitely see Reiner growing up with his mom being the type that doesn't allow bad language in the house. So he's careful about not cussing. And he definitely does, more so in high school and college when he joins a few sports teams because teen boys and all that jazz. But he tries to even outside of that or just hanging with friends because Gabi's been born and he wants to be a good example and such. 

But so I was thinkin about dating Rei and never really noticing that he tends not to curse until finally hearing him curse for one of the first times. And because it's the number one cause for yelling expletives, it happens when you're having movie night at your place. There isn't a lamp near the couch --cause who can afford a lamp in THIS economy! (okay maybe you just moved in and things are still in boxes but you both have a standing date night that moving was not going to interrupt I dunno! I dunno why my brain insists on giving convoluted scenarios that really are unneeded 🙃)--

Reiner x Reader

Anywho, no lamp. So of course you do rock paper scissors to figure out who has to get up from the snuggly warm spots on the couch to go turn off the overhead light and he loses. And after turning off the lights, in a rush to get back to the warm snuggling on the couch, he stubbs his poor bare toes on a sturdy box. "Shit!"

No, like reeeally hard. "SHIT MOTHERFU-!" Perfect. So yes. He stubs his toe so hard it throws off his generally great balance and as he's trying not to land on anything important he falls to the floor with a big thud! "Fuck!" 

And the whole thing happens in a number of seconds. 

You've launched yourself over to the side of the couch closest to him now. Peering down in the dim light of the DVD Title Menu screen, "Rei, honey you good?" 

He's sitting up by this point, groaning and muttering as he squeezes his poor, traumatized toe. "Yeah. 'M good." Casting those warm amber eyes over to you, Reiner tries for a grin but manages more of a grimace as he starts to pick himself up. "Too eager to get back to cuddling you." 

Settling back into your previous spot on the couch you notice him not putting his assaulted foot fully on the floor. "Aww, sweet baby." 

His large body sinks gingerly onto the sofa beside you. He's not trying to sustain any more injuries just dropping himself heavy onto the cushions like he wants to. 

"You sure you're good? Don't think I've ever heard you swear like that before." 

Reiner dips his head, masking his face in shadow as he feels his cheeks heat. Not that you could see it in the minimal lighting anyway. "Sorry. Didn't mean to. But yeah. I'm okay." To prove his point he lifts up both his legs and wiggles his toes, back-lit by the TV screen. "All in working order." 

A tiny amused huff of air puffs past your lips at the endearing little gesture. "Okay." While patting around the fleece blanket with one hand for the remote, your other arm lifts to rest across his broad shoulders. Your fingers curve around the top of his head, sinking into the soft blond strands as you begin massaging gently. It's an unconscious action at this point. You've argued before that running your fingers through his hair feels just as nice to you as it does for him. 

Reiner's neck is tilted back, by the time you finally locate the remote beneath the folds of endless fleece. Eyes closed, completely content to just listen to the movie he's forgotten the title of already. 

"Also, you didn't have to apologize. For cursing." He turns his head just slightly to see you looking at him with a fond smile. "I don't mind. I honestly can't believe this is literally the first time I've ever heard you do it. And we've been dating for months." 

You settle the remote on your lap and keep your eyes on his face. There's a short silence as you watch Reiner's mouth twitch. His brows pull down slightly like he's sifting for the right words. 

"My mom always said it was a vulgar habit. So I grew up making sure I didn't slip up at home or in front of strangers." 

You laugh and have to quickly follow it with words when you notice Reiner's face go tense. "Sorry, was just laughing cause I'm happy to know after three months of dating you no longer see me as a stranger." 

Immediately Reiner starts to sit up straighter, eyes going wide as he angles his large body toward you. "That's not what I–" 

One of your fingers presses to his lips, silencing his rebuttal. The hand that'd been occupied in his hair now lays comfortably on his shoulder. "I know honey. Relax. I'm just teasing." 

Grin still present from your earlier laughter, you lean in for a slow, tender kiss that has Reiner melting further toward you. Your foreheads rest together as you part from his lips. You have to bit your bottom lip to seal in another delighted chuckle when your eyes open to see his, closed. Honey blond lashes fanned against his cheeks and pretty, wet lips still slightly puckered for more kisses. It never ceased to charm you how such a large, handsome and objectively intimidating man could simultaneously produce the most adorable mannerisms. 

"I hope you can feel comfortable enough to do it more in the future. If the urge strikes. Liiiike another lost battle against a box. Or anything really. Whatever. You don't have to hold any part of yourself back from me, Reiner. Okay?" 

His eyes had fluttered open as soon as you began to speak. His head nods a bit. A slight up and down motion you feel more than see, with your foreheads still touching. Reiner's eyes close again as he presses forward for another kiss. 

You pull back, increasing the distance between your faces as both your hands move to cup his cheeks. "I mean it." 

Finally his mouth quirks up in a smile, "I got it." 

"Good." Index fingers from both of your hands twiddle the short hairs just above his ears. "So you get that also means if the urge strikes to curse in a positive way?"

"Positive way?" Rei's brows knit together as he tilts his head just a smidge to the left. "Maybe I don't, got it." 

Another short burst of laughter leads your response, "Yeah. Positive way. Like overcome with such positive feelings the only words that can truuuly harness the euphoria are curses."

His head cants further at an angle before things click in place. "Oooh. Really?" 

"Mmmhm. Actually, if you wanna be more vocal in general, I'd like that. I love the sound of your moans, but the right words can really hit different." 

"Oh. I can try to talk more, if you like that." 

"Ideally, you'll like it too."

"Mhm." 

You can tell by that short response that he's getting caught up in his head. "Reiner?" Your palms squish in his cheeks gently. "Are you trying to think of what things you'd say?"

"Uh. Maybe. I feel like it'll be awkward. No one's ever asked me to talk more during sex. Didn't know it was a thing, to be honest."

Pulling your hands from his face you mute the TV. The DVD Title Menu music was becoming a bit overestimating for this conversation. With the repetitive sounds silenced you maneuvered your body to more comfortably talk with Rei. One leg tucked up between you both, other still situated over the front of the couch. Soft, fluffy blanket redistributed over both of your lower halves.

Reiner, resettled himself in a more comfy position too. Elbow resting against the back of the couch so he could lean his cheek on his knuckles. It wasn't uncommon for conversations to bloom up and distract you both from previously set plans. While it had been a bit unsettling at first, he really relished them now. He was unused to people asking questions and genuinely wanting to hear his thoughts. Okay, that wasn't entirely true. Bertholdt had always been an active listener. So was Pieck. But they'd known each other since elementary school and were close friends.  

Maybe that's what it was. He wasn't used to these kinds of conversations happening so frequently with a romantic partner. None of them had ever been so curious to ask and he'd never gotten around to offering up the information freely. Perhaps that was something he should bring up in his next therapy session. 

"Hmm, do you think it's awkward when I talk while we're having sex?" 

There's quiet confidence paired alongside genuine curiosity situated in your tone. And while it's been many years since he's been a virgin, this simple straightforward question has the tip of his ears flushing hot. 

Reiner forces himself to meet your gaze as he responds, "No. I just figured…I don't know. Just never thought about it."

"Not that anyone should use them as any kind of blueprint for real sex, but is there no dirty talk in the porn you watch? Like, the dudes. Do they not say anything?"

If he'd been eating or drinking, he would've certainly choked. Mark this down for another topic he's never discussed with a partner before. "Uh, no? Maybe? Like you said, I don't really watch to pick up tips or tricks." Okay. Maybe that wasn't fully the truth. Some videos had certainly sparked fantasies he's put into motion once or twice. 

"Okay, fair." Lifting up the blanket, you move the leg you've had extended over the front of the couch, across Reiner's lap. "Hmm…We'll have to find you more memorable porn, babe." 

You snort out a laugh and the sounds eases the tension of embarrassment coiling in his gut. His free arm slips beneath the blanket to hug your leg close to his body. The heat from his palm is distinct as he smooths his hand up and down the outward side of your leg. "You've got to be the first girl I've ever met that wants their boyfriend to watch more porn." 

"I'm most definitely not. You just haven't reached that stage of information security clearance with other women yet. And I'll have you know, I was implying you need to watch better porn, not necessarily, more." A giant grin stretches across your face after putting on a mockingly serious voice for that last sentence. Obviously, you're in a very playful mood tonight and the energy is infectious. 

"Ah. Forgive me, that's a very important difference right there."

"Damn right it is!" 

Reiner can't help but shake his head at the ridiculous exclamation even has laughter rumbles out through his lips.

#was gonna keep this in my hoogle docs #but i just spent over two hrs on this probs so its getting jetted into the internet ether #hopefully it's entertaining for others #and you can donate some comments of your thoughts below? 👉🏽👈🏽 #reiner x reader #nat writes #aot x reader #aot meta #reiner braun #there is so much conjecture in the top meta rambling #but it's for my plot so meh #there also coulda been more but again this wasnt even supposed to be all this #and my brain is tired 🥲