#end of july has some good stuff and my bday is early august but school is like a week later :(

[wrecking]

i don't wanna keep talking about it because i know it's annoying but i'm still so shook up over the emergency room visit and like, in theory tomorrow will be at least some resolution of it (my first appointment with a normal doctor now that the Threat is deconfirmed) but like idk it's just constantly on my mind and it's making me anxious and i hate it bc i just wanna lay in bed and cry but i can't and also everyone else probably thinks i'm insane for being so worked up over it still. knowing how things go with them and i, if i said anything about it to my parents, they'd probably mock me for it

#d #also hi i'm doing blog queue / draft cleanup rn and a lot more aesthetic posts are coming up #the blog's already trended towards them for a while but now they are the vast majority of posts so i hope you like seeing them #back on topic of the post i think some of this is bc everything i'm excited for is either delayed or cancelled like #was looking forward to a new t*ylor rerecord this summer and a nintendo direct this month #and splatoon 3 in july... none of which have happened #end of july has some good stuff and my bday is early august but school is like a week later :( #oh and i still have to sign up for that on wednesday cuz their site was under maintenance or something #which is just so cool bc i was hoping to do it during the clusterfuck so i could just emotionally not have to anticipate it & gruel over it #oh well what else can you do #sorry i'm actually somewhat venting for once bc i am not doing well lol #at least i'm making a lot of wc and am almost done with my minecraft house #still have to get back onto working on game and try to get as much done before school starts as possible #same with wc cuz idk how school is gonna affect my workflow yet #and then splat in september... a lot #back on topic part 2 but. when that whole er thing was happening i considered coming out to my parents cuz like. why not ykn #like what's the worst that could happen i'm literally in the er if they react weird it's a bad look for them #but i decided not to and now i'm like. well now what #just hoping things work out ok. maybe being 24 will be better