#even after sukuna wins & destroys everything n everyone itadori loves (even more)..or something

[strawberryseeded]

itadori yuji: unwavering humanity

sorry this is mostly rambling tbh i just need to get this STUFF out of my system !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! hahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ive had this in my drafts for over a MONTH now so i just need it OUT

from the beginning of jjk, itadori wants to help ppl by allowing them to die a "proper death". during his time as a sorcerer, however, and particulary after (his first time lol) dying in the reform school, he realized how weak he was & how much he wasnt even in control of his own death. the curses were. sukuna was. and itadori learnt what it felt to be scared of his own helplessness.

but still, bc hes itadori yuji (a very stubborn guy who keep moving forward no matter what, without thinking, without an ounce of self-preservation), he still mantained this goal of helping ppl. this time, however, understanding that in order to do so, he has to (in typical shounen fashion) get stronger.

in the next arc, itadori meets junpei and mahito. we learn that junpei is a nice kid, but as we know, after much pain and sorrow plus mahito's manipulation and corruption, he ends up trying to kill his classmates. itadori once again faces the fact that there's a lot of evil in this world. there's people he can't save, things he can't fix. even more importantly, if it's about curses as evil as mahito, he wants to kill (itadori and mahito's enmity is really prolongued and interesting in general, constantly making each other evolve).

a bit later, he and kugisaki kill two death wombs (who they believe are curses at first) and after that he learns (from sukuna who just needs to make him suffer more, as a little treat <3) that it's bc he ate sukuna's finger that many spirits are awakening and causing ppl to die. he doesn't exactly regret his actions, but it all weights on him, painfully so.

on his way to save as many ppl as possible, itadori has become stronger, but he's also killed.

then comes shibuya (ha.....)

after losing people so close to him, allowing sukuna to end so many lives and being made fun of by sukuna and mahito for being so naive and (again) so weak, itadori almost gave up his goal. it's thanks to todo's ted talk that he got up again (as he always does).

itadori thru this arc learns to see himself not as a hero but as a cog in a machine. he's only human, after all: an individual (a weak one at that), but also part of something way bigger. his values, beliefs and desires are itadori's: born from his temperament and upbringing. individual. but the fact that he is human shapes him, the same way being a curse shapes mahito.

itadori finally understands that caring about people it's in his nature because he is human, but also that the why doesnt matter. and so, to save people, he'll kill mahito like it's also second nature to him.

(is he fine with it? does he want to? thats not relevant anymore. he's only following his nature, moving in automatic-mode. like a predator when he sees prey. not evil, not selfish. just doing what he needs to, what he's made for).

after shibuya itadori changes. he's still him, but the way he kills curses and tackles his job as a sorcerer it's almost machine-like. it's kinda eerie. we know he's not a machine, obviously. by this point we know itadori well: his immense suffering caused by other's peoples deaths and pain, we see his scars. he's still very much human, and still very much itadori.

more than ever before he wants to help people.

the thing is... despite what he said to mahito about saving people "for no reason, just like mahito kills and makes people suffer for no reason", itadori's desire to help people says a lot about him.

from the very beginning this desire has profoundly affected the way he interacts with other people and also the way he views himself. he's only worthy and valuable when he's able to save people. it gives him a role to play, a reason to live, a way to connect with others.

(it always has: in one of the first chs (i think ch 3 in the manga?), when confronted with the reason for becoming a sorcerer, he finally admits that he wanted something only he could do. that's even why he joined the occult club (which was bound to shut down without him) but not the sports clubs even when he was clearly gifted for any sport he could play. yes, it was also bc he wanted to visit his grandpa at the hospital, but itadori wanted to be needed. to serve others).

even when it's hard, when he doesn't want to, when the price is so high...

for itadori it's not only an instinct, it's a choice.

and then the culling games happen... and sukuna takes megumi's body.

megumi's itadori's friend, itadori cares about him. and megumi saved him. and he is taken by sukuna bc of itadori's fault. bc of the vow he and sukuna made that itadori cant even remember.

itadori's no longer sukuna's vessel now, so his initial purpose of retrieving sukuna's fingers so he can be killed along him is over. by this point he's long realized not only that he can't save every single person, but that he cant avoid killing and hurting other ppl, can't control his own death, can't even protect people who are close and important to him. he's weak, he's "bad". guilty. but it's not like before; itadori doesn't want to absolve his sins, that's not why he does what he does.

itadori's only goal remains unchanged: to save megumi and fucking KILL sukuna once and for all. it's literally his life purpose; once a wish given by his grandfather, then a duty imposed by the jujutsu society. now, it's itadori's own will. he despises sukuna. it's absolutely personal.

more than ever, his capability to help and save other people gives him a purpose, a reason to live and keep moving forward. its what keeps him grounded and himself. what makes him so human, despite all the pain and all the evil, despite all of the powerful curses and curse users around him who thrive on hurting and taking. no matter how many times he's beaten to the ground, he gets up again, his ideal never faltering. he'll always care about and do his best to protect people.

this is the reason why sukuna cant really figure him out. why he says over and over again thru the series that itadori's boring and weak. sukuna was human once, a sorcerer as well, but the thing is... he was strong. insanely so. and the way sees it, being strong is everything, not a plus, but a must. being weak is equivalent to death, so helping the weak is pointless. being already at the top of the food chain, sukuna's only moved by and interested in power and strenght, and so, he doesnt really get itadori. he sees him as -basically- a pathetic insect, which is, funnily, part of the reason why he hasnt killed him yet (the other part of the reason is, as ive said, that itadori is tough as nails).

& maybe it sounds kinda cheesy but i do truly think that all of what i just said is the reason why itadori just might win. he literally represents the compassion and resilience of humans, even against pure evil. this unwavering humanity and love for other people, even when it's painful and hard, is what makes him so strong, in a way sukuna doesnt understand. this is why people love itadori yuji.

#NOTE: each time i say itadori's weak i mean by jjk's world's cruel standars lol T-T this boy is STRONG both physically & mentally #jjk #jjk manga spoilers #no i can't stop thinking abt itadori yuji AGAIN. SO WHAT #i wanna talk more abt sukuna..hes insane. but ill SHUT UP for now #oh alsoooooooo another part of me believes that uhh sukuna might as well win and jjk will end in a 'and the adventure continues...' #bad yet hopeful kinda way...like..itadori & sukuna keep fighting till death #even after sukuna wins & destroys everything n everyone itadori loves (even more)..or something #BUT I WANTED 2 KEEP THE POST ITSELF POSITIVE SO THAT STAYS IN THE TAGS #....oh fuck ...tthis..got long.... #di4ry