#first at the dermatologist with my eczema being dismissed over and over again as nothing

[raeofgayshine]

Today was a supremely crappy day, so I ordered myself an early birthday present (by like two weeks but still) and it should come right around my actual birthday, and I was going to do it anyways after I got birthday money but you know

Kind of just been a crappy little while, I’ve been working on my gender playlist to help and since I have a feeling I’ll be under my weighted blanket most of tomorrow maybe I’ll post the current version of it. Might even explain some of the songs if I feel up to it.

Anyways doctors fucking suck and I already knew this but being told over and over there’s nothing actually wrong really fucking wears on me. Maybe if we just stopped trying to diagnose me for something I don’t fit and look at the whole picture… but that would make sense wouldn’t it?

#ravenpuff rambles #I simply do not think anyone should have to fight to get a diagnosis for literally anything #it’s so tiring #for like 2 years non stop I’ve been dealing with this shit #first at the dermatologist with my eczema being dismissed over and over again as nothing #and also having to fight that man to give me a rosacea diagnosis when I had all the very clear symptoms of it #(but what do I know not like I live here) #and now #now I’m in this fight over my pain #which is leading into a fight to all my other issues #you know maybe my pain my memory issues my constant brain fog and insomnia #you know maybe they’re all fucking connected #I know it’s possible!! I even know that’s it’s probably likely #but no let’s again try treatments for the same thing that it was already determined I don’t have just because I’m young #and my pain fluctuates every day (which is normal btw. pain isn’t always consistent) #when I once again prove to another doctor it’s not carpal tunnel syndrome or arthritis which means they actually have to look for an answer #I don’t know if I’m going to laugh or cry about being right #I do know I left the doctor pissed about not being taken seriously #but I know that’s how it goes so at least I kept my cool inside