#god bless genderbends where nothing changes at all

[yourrockdog]

every boreo genderbend i see deeply saddens me because i don’t think either of them would be the femme. and i think they would still be gross looking male adjacent like they are in canon except they’re just butches. that’s just the way it is. Boris already looks like a beautiful androgynous woman i’d see standing outside the bar who asks me for a cigarette in her deep man voice and i get so hard i almost pass out. i think they would still be named Theo and Boris too. by choice. nothing changes except they have evil lesbian sex instead of evil gay sex

#tgf #god bless genderbends where nothing changes at all #these are men? boom. These are women-men now. vaguely transsexualified as opposed to forced feminized #and i know ohhh theo and his forced conformity wouldn’t that carry over realistically…. DONT CARE! #woman who looks like just her father in every mode of presentation #and is just like fuck it. dressing like a girl is not going to free me of my shackles. let’s have a little fun with this one

[sowthetide]

I saw the words If, Joffrey and Girl, in your previous ask and immidietly thought of And bless the daughter but fuck the family by dwellingondreams on ao32 that I read recently. And it was CRAZY GOOD??! The Joanna-Cersei interactions goes so hard. Especially with the whole younger more beautiful queen thing taking all she holds dear thing I just know internally Cersei’s probaly like ‘That’s Oomf but I low-key hate her 😭😭’

And I have yet to find a good genderbend Jon fic myself 1) Most of them are not my taste writing wise and 2) Those that I think ARE well written have Jon like you said act like a feisty she-dragon-wolf hot maiden who is hot or she’s just an object of desires for the men around her and by around her I mean any living man in Planetos ( i once remember reading a story where 14 years old girl!Jon was getting married to Oberyn and girl!Jon was thinking about how she didn’t need to shave because she had found or made a salve that dissolved all her body hair?? FORVER!!! and I was like ???? Then I continued reading of course ) And I have nothing against exploring incest in fiction ESPECIALLY in asoiaf like bear found on bear island…. But the girl!Jon/Robb thing doesn’t really hit because I think gay incest will always be better than straight incest,,,,Exemples : Aegon and Orys. Aenys and Maegor. Aemon and Baelon. Rhaena and Baela. The maiden vault girlies during the later years #keepingitlegal. Aemon The Dragonknight and Aeg-[GUNSHOT]. Umm what was i talking about again??

I totally agree that for a genderbend to stick the character should still have at least trace of what their original gender counterpart has like why is Fem!Jon not sulking , throwing little tantrums, being conflicted and feeling guilty every waking hour of the day :( like please make her a little bit emo please please please-

For ME! for a genderbend story to HIT, the character getting bended must have a 1) An Interesting and Very Fucked connection to BOTH parents that the gender thing can only worsen and 2) Also a Also Very Fucked Not Good Kinda Bad What’s Wrong With You relation to their gender and patriarchal norms in Westeros. Again, it’s asoiaf so it doesn’t really narrow it down that much( Mommy/ Daddy issues + not seeing women as people? That’s every bitch like ??) but I’m going on the basis that u understand my vision of like : Jon = decent/good. Theon,Joffrey,Maegor = GO CRAZY GO STUPID€/&/@1@

(Also genderbends only work on way for me because why would I turn a woman 🥰 into a man 😐)

Just read "And bless the daughter but fuck the family" and uhhh... 😵‍💫 Okay okay okay. Perfectly insane genderbend. Give it a read, y'all (and tbh all of dwellordreams' fics go crazy, so check 'em out!)

Warning: mean opinions incoming. I'm a nice person usually I swear, I just also enjoy hating sometimes. Firstly, I agree that most Jon genderbends blow ass. Oftentimes, "Jon" just seems like a female author self-insert for someone who thinks Sansa is too girly/lame. Which I wouldn't generally have a problem with (we're all just here for a good time, and one man's unbearable cringe is another man's life-changing magnum opus), but it makes it hard to find genderbends that do interesting things with the actual character, rather than just inventing a female OC and calling it Jon.

"i once remember reading a story where 14 years old girl!Jon was getting married to Oberyn and girl!Jon was thinking about how she didn’t need to shave because she had found or made a salve that dissolved all her body hair?? FORVER!!! and I was like ????"

Oh my god lmaoooo. Beyond the ridiculousness of that, modern values in ASOIAF fics is more than a pet peeve to me, it's like a... man-eating tiger peeve. For instance, I quite like "Adjust For The Wind", as it's what inspired me to write Sow the Tide, but it also has a bizarre bit about women shaving their legs & genitals. Like:

Southern ladies are expected to remove all hair from between their legs.

&

“If you decide to groom between your legs using a razor or a knife, practice on your legs first. You can also use walnut oil, or bandages soaked in ammonia in a pinch.” Theon frowned. “I… see,” he parroted Mordane’s words. “And what do I use to keep myself clean… um, down there?”

Like literally what the fuck are you talking about lmao. To say that this took me out of the fic would be an understatement. I was so bothered by this that I tried to find actual published sources, but there didn't seem to be any particularly strong answers (besides that shaved genitals were more common among prostitutes). Also, for anyone reading, you do NOT need to clean inside your vagina, and your vulva (outside your vagina) should only be cleaned with warm water and a gentle soap if necessary. A strange place for me to make this point, but I'm making it.

I also tried a Jon genderbend fic recently, except fem!Jon had purple eyes and didn't look like Ned at all??? Despite that being a critical aspect of Jon's appearance??? I was just so completely flabbergasted because this author changed almost everything about Jon's appearance and personality, but somehow it's still supposedly Jon??? Like that's literally just an OC. Worse, of all things to keep, they stuck with Jon's canon age of 14 in a fic based around a romance with a 22-year-old man (Willas Tyrell). Maybe it's just because I'm 22 myself, but my immediate reaction was literally: "hm. I think Willas should be beaten to death." Like the fic itself felt tantamount to character assassination of Willas 😭 I was even bitching about this (wildly popular) fic on Discord:

I just hope to god the fic writer was a teenager, otherwise it seems like they just took GRRM's creepy handling of young characters like Dany at face value. Westeros obviously has different values, but it's concerning when the author themself seems to buy into those pedophilic standards.

GAY INCEST WILL ALWAYS BE BETTER THAN STRAIGHT INCEST!!!!!!!!! 🗣️

lmaooooo. Also: "genderbends only work on way for me because why would I turn a woman 🥰 into a man 😐" <- REAL SHIT!!!!!!! You had me cracking up with that one.

Also also: "Aemon The Dragonknight and Aegon" SAY THAT!!!!!!!

Seriously. Let fem!Jon be a sulky, prickly, angry, kind, self-important little emo. Let fem!Theon be an ambitious, vain, insecure, proud, also self-important little bitch. A complicated relationship with one's parents is a plus, and a complicated relationship with Gender is a MUST! Bonus points if they're a crazy bitch in canon (Theon, Joffrey, Maegor, as you point out)!!! I've currently been thinking about fem!Maegor ngl... 👀

Anyway, thank you for dropping in. I'm probably gonna end up making a fun haterism server with goddcoward and some other homies, in addition to the more chill Quen sever. If that comes to fruition, join us in the silly complaint circle!

#ask #green rat (yes i'm still doing the unsullied names. mwah!)