#he is more of a blorbo in law but i am still in SHOOK

[seerdeer]

Its been 2 days since our DND game and I'm still thinking about what fucking happened. I think if we actually released them we'd be pretty popular but in a vague order of what happened in one (1) normal Friday DND game we do weekly:

1. Made a pass at our Fighter because he described Virinn's bedside manners (only person with medical proficiency, btw) as terrible and she said that "For people like him he would have to pay to get better service" said with so much innuendo two different players said they pretended they didn't hear that (also note. She is a lesbian)

2. Met with one of our competitors for a tournament we are entering and tried to horny pass at him too, got free dinner out of it (this is important later)

3. Exploded 3 different training dummies for said tournament, including our druid using a call lightning after missing both wildshape attacks

4.

5. Our druid met with the pirate we saved earlier who we will also be fighting in the tournament. Threw hot coco on him. Transformed into a rat and shook their fat rat ass at their allies (we will also be fighting)

6. Went to dinner with the one dude. Our barbarian walked out during a conversation he didn't like (he came back later). Our fighter ordered multiple different very fancy meals as this dude was paying for us and got a massive tab. And i continued my attempts to get in this guy's pants for information.

7. Did convince this dude to hang out with me. Failed in fucking. Played board games with this dude til 3 am where i could snoop. One of my friends put it as "Went in to unenthusiastically fuck. Did not get it. Still won (??)"

8. Got a boys night with our cleric, fighter, and barbarian in what can only be described in its own subset of occurrences

8a. Our cleric was already drunk off the aforementioned previous dinner and wanted to do something dangerous and stupid and maybe social. Our fighter told him to jump off a building. Our barbarian stopped this plan and so they went to a bar. On the way to the bar told our cleric to swallow his (cursed) luck stone, which after discussing with he dm is the size of a baseball and not a pebble like he thought, which leads to more hilarious imagery.

8b. At the bar, ordered drinks that were a platinum a piece (we'll get back to that)

8c. Harper discussed wanting to know how to flirt with people and got the highlight of the session of "What's your type" "do you know the kiki and boba study? He's looking for a kiki" which resulted in phrases the rest of the night of "there is one male kiki at that table" and "chads and kikis love chugging drinks"

8d. While hyping this dude up the expensive drinks arrived, which were described as having literal crushed starlight in them. Our fighter nat 20'd the con save. Our cleric did not. He was knocked out from the damage. Received an inspiration die for the trouble. This was apparently the plan the entire time to get him knocked out. A patron took pity and healed him so he was no longer unconscious

9. Virinn catches up with them leaving the bar as she was also at the same inn. Helped carry our cleric home and got to have some heart to heart lore with our cleric. Virinn was given one of his blankets to keep. (I need to work this into my design. The fact i am going to have another character with big layers is funny to me. Inspos from my blorbos in law val)

10. Virinn tucked our cleric into bed on our boat in full view of our barbarian and denied any caring and took first watch.

11. Our fighter decided to try and walk off the booze. Got lost. Met with the projected winner of the tournament on accident. Thankfully didn't get his head beat in.

Again I'm just saying we would be very popular i think with the population. We are very stupid.

#dnd #personal #id tag the campaign but i dont need people connecting the dots #virinn #lyla speak