#he’s mute in all of this obv just making sure. Not mute roach is awful let him sign!

[pupyr0arz]

Roach fic but it's just an apoc themed adventure with roach and reader (romantic??? Idk lol whatever) and they just be chilling in their hideout, scavenging for stuff while goofing around and whatnot lmao

Sorry I'm a sucker for apoc 😭😭

NO NO UR SO REQL FOR THAT!!! roach would be the funniest post apocalyptic roommate ever. I HC he was like raised fuckin Amish or something so he’s got extremely weird knowledge bases and massive gaps. You throw together some movies one night after scrounging up a projector and he’s in love with them. Super useful to have around

Zombie apocalypse roach having one Really Impractical Trap/Weapon that yes, is objectively useless but goddamnit one of these days it is going to be the funniest fucking thing just you wait. Gets bored when you’re checking inside buildings and throws rocks at zombies. Best selfie with a Walker challenge. Biking across the countryside together. He’d keep one of those walls with zombie heads but it’s just stupid hats he stole off of them. Kinda guy to offer you Barbie themed bandaids.

post nuclear apocalypse roach where he brings up how he didn’t get cool nuclear mutation superpowers and you’re like dude that’s super fucked up and a bunch of people died. Also those powers are dumb. Id want to fly. And he’s like NUH UH MINE ARE COOLER and literally never lets it go. Puppet shows when you stop the car it’s episode 8491 of a weird soap opera western hybrid. You meet up with a settlement and you end up getting up at midnight like every night bc he wants to go on walks to burn off The Jitters. Totally thinks the all spiky look is cool but you’d call him tacky so hard he’d literally roll over and die. Dares you to eat radioactive dirt. Totally is the one who brought the dog into the car and fed it but is going to pretend to blame you when it follows them and insists on taking it even though it’s 100% your fault

Alien apocalypse roach who is so disappointed because goddamnit man he loves aliens!! fuck! Extremely interested in poking around their dead bodies you’re like ew :/ and he chases you around with a chunk of one of them. Absolutely wants to commandeer a spaceship even if it’s an awful idea. While you’re staking out an outpost or something you two make up stories and drama for the aliens. Jokingly introduces himself as an alien and nearly gets shot. Does it again immediately.

roach ideally wants to travel around some and settle down in trading distance of a settlement. He’s pretty reclusive for all his energy and while he seems like a people person he’s introverted. He’s AWFUL with animals I’m sorry he loves them but they hate his vibes but he’d love to just live on a farm and get pecked every morning by your stupid evil chickens you refuse to turn into soup. Wakes up at 3 am to get creek water to splash you with. Doing the laundry is a simple price. Loves sleeping together he’s just going to gravitate towards that even if it’s tense sorry. Would subsist off of MREs and crackers I’m going to be honest he can cook like a dream but the thought would not pass his mind.

#he’s mute in all of this obv just making sure. Not mute roach is awful let him sign! #roach #cod #askme #anon #thank u for these ideas I’m chewing on them like taffy #If roach does anything in life it is committing to the bit #Sorry for the four edits I’m just. Thoinking