#he's a wonderfully pathetic man who dies his hair to look cool and impress his crush what do you mEAN

[just-french-me-up]

I somehow had never heard the english dub of Howl's Moving Castle and... they truly went Tumblr Sexyman voice on Howl didnt they

#howl #howl's moving castle #it just??? took me off guard #cause?????? #why did they chad him up like that #sir that's a tiktok thirst trap voice #he's a wonderfully pathetic man who dies his hair to look cool and impress his crush what do you mEAN

[potentiala]

Soudam Week - Day 6: AU

Hi! Ultimate Angst here to make its debut! Good Luck! 

The God of Death knew little of weakness.

  How could he? He was the the Great Gundham Tanaka, he was Death itself. Nothing fazed him. Nothing hurt him. He was immortal and everlasting. It was his destiny to watch the world wither and die around him.

And he found to qualm with that.

===

Centuries passed.

  Death every constant and only growing as mortals became more and more violent. Starting to kill one another for the pure rush of it, and not for survival. Now that, that disgusted Gundham. Because suddenly it wasn’t about survival. Now it was all about hatred and foolishness.

And Gundham hated human for it.

  Such pathetic, vain creature lost all favor with the God of Death. And so the God’s heart froze. Turning his back away from humans and their pettiness, Gundham turned towards the lives of Beasts. Immersing himself in their lives and struggles that were, unlike humans, pure and untainted by such filthy feelings. Their Deaths were more frequent, so Gundham made a habit of keeping selects souls around to keep him company. Naturally, the God of Death chose only the fiercest and most loyal of warriors to keep by his side.

Four hamsters.

  The feared Four Dark Devas of Destruction who were the only ones to give the ice cold God of Death any warmth. Which was just fine by Gundham, the God of Death had no need for any sort of deeper attachment.

To anyone and anything.

===

A mother died today.

  Gundham never enjoyed their deaths. Because, even though they were humans themselves, they had carried a Life within their mortal forms and committed to the agony of birth to bring that new Life into the world. Indeed, out of all humans, Gundham hated mothers a little less. But that wasn’t what made this whole ordeal harder.

It was her child.

  The woman, a rather lovely thing with hair the color of darkness and eyes a brown the color of loving home, had given every ounce of her strength to bring her child into this world. A boy, Gundham noted, with many of his mother’s features. But the God of Death could do nothing.

He had to take the mother’s soul.

  A sort of burning in his hands as the Overlord of Ice reached for her that alerted him to how the woman’s time was up. She, at the very least, seemed at peace. Smiling softly at where her screaming, breathing, and wonderfully alive was being passed around by many a doctor. She was ready, accepting of death.

Her job done.

  But Gundham, for the first time in his immortal existence, hesitated. Was it...right of him to separate a child from his mother like this? With that same child screaming and crying for any sort of comfort? Was it right for hi to-Wait. What?

What was he doing?

  He was the Great Gundham Tanaka! The God of Death! The true ruler of this world and all others! What was he doing?! Sympathizing with these...mortals! Their problems, their plight, their agony and despair were of no concern to him! And so, with his terrible resolve restored, the God of Death reaped the soul of one Hanami Rei-Kazuichi.

Leaving Souda Kazuichi without a mother.

===

The will of causality was a cruel one.

  Ever since reaping the soul of his mother, he saw more and more of this ‘Souda Kazuichi.’ The boy and his father seemed deadset to live in the sort of area were other humans were mugged and killed or beaten to death. Even most beasts knew better than to spend more than a few hours in such a volatile environment. But, amidst such brutal Death, Gundham found himself trailing behind the young boy.

Naturally, he couldn’t see him.

  But Gundham noticed every little thing the child did. From chasing the stray dogs in his neighborhood on wobbly legs. To falling down, and bursting into shiny, salty tears. But, to Gundham’s disappointment, no one seemed to comfort the crying child any time he burst into tears. Every adult around him just...left him there. Be it in the middle of the sidewalk or the road, no one reached down to offer a single scrap of comfort to the young human.

And it's not like Gundham could do it.

  His touch was far too poisonous and soul-stealing. Through the Dark Devas took to brushing against the young child with ice-cold whispers of their fur whenever tears spilled out of those warm eyes. The second he made any contact with the young mortal, Gundham would have to take Souda’s soul completely. And the child still had far too much Life in him.

Still, the God of Death found himself reaching out nonetheless.

===

There were different types of humans.

  It took Gundham longer than it should’ve to realize that, but he did. There were two main types of mortals that Gundham chose to concern himself with, those who were cruel and those who weren’t. Souda, wasn’t cruel.

Those who bullied him were.

  They looked at his dark hair and warm eyes and spat in his face. Kicked at him. Beat him. Teased him. Mocked him. All while those warm, sweet eyes let loose an endless stream of tears.

All while Gundham had to hold himself back.

  Which was ridiculous! A God of Death, an Overlord of Ice, reduced to caring for a mere mortal boy? Preposterous. Downright insulting. It was beneath him in every way.

But still Gundham’s anger rose.

===

  Oh, believe him, he tried. He tried to put some distance between them. To recover some of the ice around his heart that those warm eyes had melted. Gundham had tried that one day.

The same day Souda’s father beat him for the first time.

  Gundham had felt something...deeply wrong in the air. As dangerous and unsettling as the smell of blood in the air. His instincts screaming for him to act, to do something. That Souda was in trouble. And, before Gundham’s common sense could talk him out of it, he was there. At Souda’s house.

Watching his father’s fist connect to his face.

  Gundham, for all his immortal life, would never forget that sound. That crack, that strangled cry the boy gave off as he hung, limp and defenseless, in his father’s grip. Gundham, even as the God of Death, would always be haunted by that image. By the picture of Souda’s pale skin striped with bright blood and lovely eyes rolling back into his skull. And, in that moment, Gundham never wished to kill a human so strongly before.

And he nearly did it to.

  The God of Death’s hands were right there. Ready to wrap around Souda’s father’s neck and snap his head off like a toy. He had all the fury of a true, bloodthirst Death God. Vision running red with the sheer force of his anger and the screaming of all the soul he had reaped in his ears.

But Gundham stopped himself.

  What was he doing? It was not this man’s time yet. What was he doing, trying to take a mortal before his time? And for what? For one mortal boy Gundham owed nothing to. The God of Death had taken his mother, but so what? It was her time, her choice. And she chose Souda’s life over her’s. So it wasn’t his responsibility to look after her spawn.

  He owed Souda nothing, Gundham told himself as he watched as Souda’s father eventually grew bored and left his son. Bleeding from the nose, on the living room floor. I don’t care, Gundham told himself as Souda eventually regained consciousness and pulled himself up on scraped knees. Salty tears mixing with open wounds and whimpering whys? leaving his mouth. This has nothing to do with me, Gundham told himself.

But it still sounded like a lie.

===

Souda grew.

And Souda changed.

  The teeth, serrated and sharp still stayed the same. The only trait he had gotten from the Demon that was his father. But the young man had willingly changed everything else about him. Gone were those dark, deep tresses and warm, lovely eyes. Only to be replace by bright pink hair and striking contacts. And, fool himself as he might, the God of Death mourned the loss of suck soft, precious features. But to his horror, Gundham found himself doing something else whenever he could visited Souda.

He studied him.

  Focused on the teenager as if they were only two beings in the world. Gundham, with time, found that he did really mind the changes Souda made to himself. So many things were still the same after all. Souda’s excitement over stray dogs. His timid, crybaby nature. The thick line of his eyelashes. The absent-minded braiding of his hair. The wonderful way his hands moved when working on machines.

Gundham found himself even more entranced.

  Found himself even more enamored and endeared. Souda had grown up strong and clever. Getting accepted in the prestigious school and getting away from the evening beatings of his household. Souda had escaped.

He was free.

  Which should’ve released Gundham from any and all guilt and worry. And, to most extents, it did. Seeing Souda so happy after so long in despair was wonderful. And a hopeful Souda was the most beautiful thing in the world to Gundham’s all-seeing eyes. He watched Souda make pure wonders out of metal. He watched him make friends out of all his strange classmates. Watched him grow a little more confident, a little more brave.

Gundham watched Souda fall in love.

  First with a royal classmate of his. A beautiful blonde girl who Gundham swore could sense his presence. An impressive creature with the girl of the Dark Arts that didn’t quite reciprocate his feelings. A sweet girl who still made Souda bawl his eyes out many a night. All while Gundham could just stand above him, fighting the urge to reach out and comfort Souda. With his hands, with his arms, with teeth, lips, and tongue. But Gundham did nothing but hold his own body back from acting on his deep, dark impulses. But before the Overlord of Ice could come to terms with these bubbling, dangerous feelings, Souda fell in love.

Again.

  But this time it was different. This time it was with boy with hair a similarly dyed, spiky mess. This time it was with a loud, funny mortal with cool blue-gray eyes and a lopsided grin. This time it was with a sports star with equally calloused hands and similar desires to change themselves from the outside. This time it was different.

This time the mortal loved Souda back.

  All while Gundham could only watch, invisible to their eyes, as the mortal pressed warm, wonderfully alive kisses onto Souda’s mouth. The same mouth Gundham had watched smile and laugh and cry and scream for all his life. Truly, Gundham thought.

Humans were horrible creatures.

===

It was easier to leave Souda alone after that.

  But it was harder to tell himself that he wasn’t hurting. Him! The God of Death! Hiding away from human like a scorned admirer. But what was Gundham to do? The very sight of Souda hurt him worse than anything he had ever experienced in his mortal life.

Which was ridiculous.

  Souda had never seen him, felt him, or talked to him. The mortal boy had no reason to choose Gundham over another mortal. Another mortal he could touch and hold and have dry all his tears away. Souda was better off loving that mortal. Souda was happy with that mortal.

No matter what Gundham felt about it.

  It was only then that Gundham learned what true weakness was. Weakness was always looking, always wishing for something but always having it just out of your reach. Just dancing out of your fingertips. Weakness was a cruel thing.

And love had made Gundham weak.

===

It happened one day, years later.

  But, to a God of Death, those years passed with a single blink of his eyes. Those years were nothing to Gundham. Nothing but hurt feelings and childish avoidance. Those years were nothing to him.

But they quickly became everything.

  It started when Gundham felt...that again. That overwhelming wrongness in the air. A crippling sense of despair that Gundham knew immediately that it was Souda.

Souda!

  Gundham was there in an instant. There, in that familiar place. There, at Souda’s house. The one with his father, the one with the Demon who beat him all his life. The scene was horrifically similar as well. Police cars lining up with narrow, dirt-filled streets. Sirens slashing into the air with frantic madness. An ambulance at the ready past the tangle of squad cars. Gundham couldn’t move at first. Then the world stopped.

And he moved.

  Slowly, stiffly on lead legs. Right, left, right left. Gundham stumbled past police officers frozen in place. Past movements halted in the moment. Gundham moved past it all. Souda?

Souda where are you?

  Gundham walked through the familiar entrance to the Kazuichi household. That’s when he saw it. That's when Gundham’s immortal soul knew true fear.

True despair.

  Souda’s father was passed out on the couch. Too drunk to be of any use to the world. But that wasn’t an unusual sight to Gundham by now. No. What hit the God of Death like a barrage of bullets was that Demon’s hands.

Slick with blood.

  Ah, there it was again. On the kitchen countertop, not to far away. It was pooling there. Dripping down to the floor to make another puddle. Oh.

There was a trail of it.

  Gundham’s head felt light. The long-since melted heart in his chest felt like it was trying to climb up and out of his throat to explode out of his mouth in a scream of blood. Gundham followed the trail of blood. Like breadcrumbs leading him home. Home? Souda?

Where was he?

  The Overlord of Ice was able to squeeze past the narrow hallway, following the spotted trail of blood, to Souda’s room. The door hanging open like he had rushed in. And it was then and there that Gundham Found Souda.

And Death fell to his knees.

===

Souda had came home.

  He had promised himself he never would, but it happened. Mainly because of Leon. Souda...Souda wanted to marry him. After the both of them graduated Hope’s Peak, they had talked about it. Even going so far as to looking for apartments that could double as recording studios and garages. Everything was looking good.

Too good.

  But Souda had to see his dad, just one last time. To do what, he wasn’t exactly sure. Make amends, he supposed. But time and love had dulled the innate fear Souda had of his father. And, the second he stepped inside his old house, it was like he was a fucking kid all over again.

Getting the shit beaten out of him.

  The only difference now was that Souda was just as strong, if not stronger, than his father. And, for a few precious seconds, he wa able to escape his father’s raging fists for a few, wonderful seconds.

That’s what killed him.

  His dad rushing after him and smacking his head against the pointed edge of the countertop. Blood clouded his vision. Blood ran down his face in ways it hadn't for a long, long time. Blood bit at his tongue as he tasted his own sweat and panic.

After that it was all a blur.

  A huge stumbling, painful blur of making his way to his room and trying to call Leon. Trying to get his boyfriend’s voice on the other line to clear up the blurring coldness that was eating Souda from the inside out. Souda hit the call button.

And then the world went dark.

===

Humans were such weak creatures.

  Souda was one such creature. Funny, Gundham had forgotten about that. But now, with the moonlight streaming into his familiar bedroom, such a fact became painfully obvious. His hair was spread out beneath him. Like a halo of fiery, blood-speckled pink hellfire. There were lines of blood on his face. Some dry, some still running with rich red liquid that stained the carpet underneath him.

Gundham’s hands burned.

  It was time. Time for Souda to die. To leave this mortal world. The God of Death looked at Souda’s hand, still clutching his cell phone. Calling, calling, calling that mortal he loved. What was he going to say, Gundham wondered.

I love you?

  What do mortal’s say with their last breath? Gundham had never wanted to know more than now. But, for SouDa it was too late, his brain was malfunctioning too much, too dangerously. Death would be a mercy. A sweet, cherish mercy that would be Gundham’s first and last gift to his beloved Souda. But one, just once, Gundham wanted to say it.

“I love you.”

With a palm cupping both sides of Souda’s face and those teary eyes with the popped blood vessels looking at him, Gundham leaned down.

Kissing Souda’s cold mouth.

Reaping the soul of one dear, precious, beloved Kazuichi Souda.

#soudamweek2018 #soudamweek #danganronpa #dangan ronpa #goodbye despair #soda kazuichi #tanaka gundham #soudam