#i am Going to write a trans wolfwood that is So realistic. as much as possible.

[orcelito]

Like OK so I've been reading a fic with trans wolfwood in it that is so. HONEST. About how it affected him and still affects him. In a way that's very much not an average cis writer portrayal of a trans character.

Like. Either this writer is trans or did plenty of research, but it just feels REAL to me. And it has me thinking about my own way of writing trans Wolfwood.

I'm not there yet. But I've been thinking about it. The ways that what the EOM did fucked him up... but it also acted as HRT that affirmed his gender. So what do you do when you're in a body you don't recognize, but looks much more like a man than ever before? There's some gender euphoria in a way, but dysphoria at the same time bc you didn't grow into this. You didn't watch yourself transition. Suddenly you just Were this, and it's not you, but also it's nice to finally be seen as a man, but it also feels wrong to feel grateful for any part of what they did to you...

On and on and on

You see? This is what I want to think about with him. This is why trans Wolfwood is so compelling to me. It's just so Complicated, he'd have such Complicated feelings about his body and the way he lives with it. He learns this new body, it starts to feel more like his, but he also mourns the fact that he didn't get to watch it grow into this like he should've.

That kind of thing.

#speculation nation #itnl shit #tagging it bc these r things relevant to itnl ww. because. he is trans☺️ #TRANS WOLFWOOD MY BELOVED!!!!!!!!!! #i wanna do more research into trans things. ive already done a lot. but like #into the actual physical side of it all. the effects of HRT. all those messy little details that people dont often focus on. #some months ago i skimmed thru this writing guide on how to write trans men. and i think i wanna revisit it #read it more slowly and thoroughly. #bc im confident in my ability to write trans characters. considering the fact that im not cis myself. #but im not a trans man. so there r some Things that i just dont know about by virtue of not having experience with HRT #so. research! supplementing my existing knowledge with the perspectives of the actual people im writing about. #and so it goes when ur writing about an experience that is not entirely your own. #it matters to me to make my writing of trans men as realistic as possible. #even with the messy details that people normally shy away from. Especially them. #i pride myself on my realism as much as is within my means of capturing it. #realistic emotions. realistic reactions. realistic bodies. #i am Going to write a trans wolfwood that is So realistic. as much as possible. #(i keep specifying ww with this even tho vash is trans also just bc vash is a bit more uhhhh not human lol #so the definition of what makes him trans is a bit more loose. still inferred by real life experiences #but he wouldnt have the same sorts of experiences with HRT. or gender expression in general #so i feel less of a pressure to capture it as fully accurate to the real life human experience as possible. if that makes sense.)