#i apologize in advance to my followers for all the hyperversum posts that im going to spam this summer lol

[bonnini]

ANYWAY if you’re a character in the Hyperversum trilogy and your name is “Guillaume” you have to accept that your main purpose in the saga is to deal with an endless stream of stressful bullshit and have your patience tested on a daily basis here’s proof lol:

1. My beloved, my precious Guillaume de Ponthieu, the ultimate meticulous planner, trying to keep his life free from nonsense and utterly failing at it because of external factors. The name of all these external factors is of course IAN MAAYRKAS like... Guillaume's baby brother cannot be trusted to stay put for five seconds without having someone attempt to assassinate, kidnap (hi Geoffrey lol) or maim him jdjdjddjdjsjsjk and the one who Ian always ends up involving in this nonsense is Guillaume who literally has not been able to catch a break since the day he first met him? He just spends his days either worried sick about his younger brother or running around + using his resources in order to fix the dangerous shit Ian always ends up tangled in. Ian and Guillaume’s relationship is literally just:

Guillaume loves Ian SO SO MUCH (we'll discuss this in a different post tho) but man being the oldest Ponthieu brother sure is tiring :'')

2. Guillaume de Sancerre LIKE why is it that in the Hyperversum literary universe counts named "Guillaume" always end up having a younger brother who is the cause of all their anxiety attacks lmao??? Like imagine being Etienne de Sancerre's older brother for a second: this man is physically incapable of sitting still for more than 4.5 seconds, never shuts up, says what he thinks with absolutely no filter in any situation, used to sneak out of his castle as a teen, thinks a fight is the best way to tackle any problem, has no regard for etiquette, cannot be trusted to avoid opening his mouth to make stupid and rushed remarks even in front of the king of France DOES ANYONE REMEMBER about that time Etienne spent the entire Ian+Lavaur versus Gant audience in Séour practically vibrating on his chair right next to Philippe Auguste looking like this:

waiting for the right moment to voice his support for Ian and THE SECOND he tried to open his mouth the king immediately cut him off with a deadpan "monsieur de Sancerre you will not be allowed to speak unless you have some actual proof against Gant, if you just want to talk about how your friend must be right because you love him and believe him then please shut up" hdshsjsjsjdndndbdbdndnd my man Philippe just KNEW Etienne was about to say something ridiculous right there in front of everyone JUST IMAGINE Guillaume's reaction if he had been there lol??? Please tell me you remember about how hard Guillaume was facepalming the first time Etienne ever spoke to Ian, that scene is just Etienne being his fratboy self without a care in the world and Guillaume, angry crying and screaming inside, doing his best to prevent him from being inappropriate with Ian and the other nobles?

in this house we love and appreciate Guillaume the Sancerre!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! that man is basically a saint.

3. William Long Sword!!! Count of Salisbury!!!!! He's Guillaume number three and he shares so many traits with Guillaume the Ponthieu??? Middle aged man: check. Experienced warrior: check. Very powerful, very close to the king: check (ok Guillaume is actually super loyal to his king but you get the idea). Skilled politician: check. Very used to having the upper hand during the unfolding of any political confrontation: check. Had his life turned upside down by Ian in the span of a few minutes: CHECK. USED TO LIVE A BULLSHIT-FREE LIFE BEFORE MEETING IAN AND DANIEL:CHECK.

Salisbury literally has not known peace since the day he first met Ian and Daniel, and the few days he had to spend in Dunchester waiting for news from Ian and trying to keep Daniel from getting himself hanged were the most stressful of his entire life? this man had at least four consecutive heart attacks during Daniel's honestly hysterical conversation with King John bdbdbssjsjkf

Salisbury: ok sir Freeland all you have to do is stand behind me and be silent I will handle this please just stay put. please

Daniel: ok

Also Daniel fifteen seconds later @ king John, who is currently busy having the time of his life sending people to the gallows: hi :)

Salisbury:

In conclusion: 

All Hyperversum Guillaumes are valid and I love every single one of them 

#This is just the beginning of my guillaumeposting you have been warned lol #Guillaume de Ponthieu and William Long Sword I love you guys so so so so so so much I'm going to make so many memes about the two of you #hyperversum #i apologize in advance to my followers for all the hyperversum posts that im going to spam this summer lol #you can blacklist the tag if you want to