#i basically have no support system rn except my gf bc my friends are all so busy w their own stuff

[oatbugs]

i feel rly irredeemably horrible rn...longing for emotional support....anyway vent in tags

#physically i feel so ill etc . and i have to catch up on so much #and i just got a grade back for an assignment and it wasnt a 1st and literally almost . cried bc #it rly was supposed 2 be. i dont have my housing sorted out for next yr and i am rly worried #i look hideous rn bc my face is rly swollen and it was a fat transfer so u dont get to see results for like #6 months but mostly the swelling should settle in like a month but that means i will just look #kind of monsterous for a while. i cant do archery anymore bc it involves heavy weights ig which im supposed to not do #and its like as soon as i find smth i like it is taken away...i feel . like shit. etc. and according to the clinic it is Not Normal to be #so weak. have to get lasik in a few days while still recovering from transfer + nose surgery so i literally #feel like my body is going to give out but also idk if i will find time to catch up on stuff etc i feel likr my brain is rotting #i basically have no support system rn except my gf bc my friends are all so busy w their own stuff #which is also v bad. like i cannot rely on her as my sole source of emotional support #feels like academics etc have taken a backseat this yr so far and that is Horrible like i need that to not be the case #but im too nauseous and weak etc to sit up for prolonged periods of time taking notes #taking 7 antibiotics a day etc..idk . i have to travel 6hrs #tmrw then have lasik on monday then travel back 6hrs the same afternoon or tuesday morning #like i legit already feel like my body is giving out idk how i will do this. and i feel so incredibly alone throughout #all of this . idk. #genuinely i am turning into a black hole and if things get bad again i will lose it . i hate this feeling i hate the #marked loneliness that comes b4 things spiral downwards and this feels like it #that was a lot ✌️ anyway if any1 has any advice or words to share or anytjing to say ever pls do #i need human interaction soooo badly #personal