#i don't think humans were ever meant to feel utterly elated yet deeply disappointed about the same thing at the same time

[idvo]

windows and mirrors

We're humans. We tell stories. It's what we do.

I don't think that non-marginalized people can ever really understand (even if they try their best) how painful it is to constantly be denied a chance to see themselves in the stories they love, or the fear that comes with knowing that others never see them, either- and that if they do see them, they pretend not to.

I read a post long ago about how non-queer people get to see themselves in mirrors, whereas queer people only get to look through windows. I'd like to add that we also desperately try to catch our own reflections in those windows, line them up with what's beyond the glass, trying to validate our own existence. And to be told that we're wrong for trying hurts, because what else are we supposed to do?

Queer people have been "over thinking" and "over analyzing" media for so long now, because we have to. Otherwise, we wouldn't exist in the mainstream media landscape. And really the same can be said for every marginalized group, every person who's been told that their story isn't profitable enough to be worth telling. And it fucking sucks. Even if we get the chance to put our stories on the main stage, they are always swiftly categorized as other, as if "normal" people shouldn't bother with them. They never have to resort to trying to see themselves reflected in us. And that's the shit that has real-world effects, because if they can't even care about us in stories, how can we expect them to care about us in reality?

I'm just so tired of it all.

#back on this bullshit oh man! #i might be a little drunk rn #but I needed to get this out #these past few days have been such a rollercoaster #i've been lurking as I usually do #just keeping up with the chaos #and don't get me wrong it's been a blast but holy shit am i exhausted #i don't think humans were ever meant to feel utterly elated yet deeply disappointed about the same thing at the same time #yet here we are #in less emotionally charged news i want to write fic again which is nice #anyway #nighty night! #edit as of nov 26 #misha is a sweetie who tries so hard to comfort fans #we're not upset with him or his work #but the way the network yanks us around #thank you misha for even trying to understand #i appreciate it