#i dunno why this took me forever to make lolz

[gifsbysimplysonia]

@stevieang

This is a feel good great chapter, and I’m here for it. I honestly did not know WHAT to expect after being blindsided by the end of 17 lol. And a part of me was VERY worried that lives were going to be thrown back into chaos as villains came out of the woodwork or something. Cuz in my life, as SOON as something good happens, before I can enjoy it, something bad has to come along and take the wind out of my sails :\

But Steph and Steve just get to ENJOY each other and their blessings and I am HERE FOR IT!

The ring? IS GORGEOUS! OMG! I saw the blue stone and was like, holy crap, I didn’t know there’s, like, a perfect Captain America engagement ring but THERE IT IS! Absolutely stunning. Amazing choice, Steve!

Steve? Really made me smile so hard my cheeks hurt and silently cry thoughout, like, this whole thing. I could tell his feelings were kind of hurt when Steph told him she never ACTUALLY thought he would propose. I think he internalized that and took it as, “Oh, so she doesn’t WANT to marry me.”

And it’s not that at all, and I think Steph did a REMARKABLE job at explaining herself. Seeing how far she has come, emotionally, in these 18 chapters is a testament to how thoughtful you’ve been about her development and journey.

“Remember our first date, when you told me to trust you?  Well, since then I have worked very hard to do that.  For me, that meant letting go of what might be and focusing on what is- the present moment. I knew I loved you and I just tried to stay secure in the knowledge that you felt the same.”

That right there is such an intimate confession because being vulnerable is DIFFICULT. I haven’t figured out how to do it myself. And Steph has so much baggage to deal with, and that she has been dealing with. Then getting involved with Steve inadvertantly added, like, a whole new set of luggage that she wasn’t expecting. But she’s REALLY been faithful to that promise she made to him, trying to BE with him and just enjoy what they have. So I’m glad that she reminded him of where she started and just what it means that they are where they are. 

Pretty much EVERYTHING Steve said throughout this WHOLE CHAPTER was a freakin’ dream. His declarations of love don’t come off cheesy or make me roll my eyes; maybe it’s cuz I’ve been on this journey with him or maybe it’s just cuz I love your Steve so much. But every time he opened his mouth to reinforce how much he loves Steph here, I was freakin’ crying. 

“Well, this is what is.  You, me, the girls, Bucky, my life, your life, all of it - I want everything, I want it all.  I want it for as long as we live.”

I MEAN OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

STEEEEEEEEEEEEEEVE! I adore adore adore him. 

The way he was a total brat the morning? Texting her to find out where she was cuz she wasn’t in bed and she said she’d be back in a bit and he yelled at her “NO! NOW!!” It was like, so funny, so sweet, and so sexy at the same time (cuz, hi, tell me what to do when we’re alone lol). 

OH BTW, reading this at work, I didn’t know what to expect but I certainly didn’t expect them to go home and have an intense encounter. Her asking him to help keep her quiet so as not to tip the guards off made me laaaaaaaaaaaaugh. But it’s also like, honey. Come on. They know. We’re all grown lol. 

“I’d bet folding money they have a pretty good idea. But If it makes you feel better, if you get that loud, I’ll just put something in your mouth.  Any ideas?”

So ... the way you worded that is just very Steve? “Folding money” in particular, I just love the way you put that sentence together cuz it feels right for him for some reason, maybe harkening back to some 40s lingo or something, I dunno. It just really worked for me.

But ALSO?!? STEVE ROGERS MAKING DIRTY INNUENDOS! I LIVE!!! And, of course, it’s a joke but yesplz. :P I love your Steeeeeeeeeeeeeve!

And then, andthenandthen....we went back to an issue that we hadn’t visited in a while AND I AM GRATEFUL FOR THAT. I’ve said many times on my blog that Plus Size Reader stories that FOCUS or are ALL ABOUT self loathing just ... are so not my bag. BUT, for the topic to crop up sometimes? Yeah, that’s more real life speed, at least for me. And it came up here and the way Steve handled it? Again, TOTAL DREAM. 

“I’ve told you before that you don’t need to hide any part of your body from me.  Let me remind you - you just said you would be with me forever, right?” You nodded as he took hold of your left hand and kissed your ring finger.  “It’s a two-way street.  This is as all-in as we can get.  Any hang-ups or insecurities either of us have we can get through together.  You have me, forever, but even better, I get to have you for just as long.  Now trust me, will ya?”

Like ... A DREAM. He needs her to know how committed he is, and he wants her to be right there with him. And this isn’t Steve fulfilling some sense of DUTY, WITH STEPH IS WHERE HE WANTS TO BE!! Dude keeps PROVING THAT WITH ACTIONS, and it just ... it like makes my heart BURST in an oddly painful but enjoyable way? Cuz like, that part of my brain that’ll never be open with anyone is like THIS ISN’T REAL but the romantic part of my brain is like BUT IT CAN BE AND THAT IS WHY IT IS SO AMAZING lol You just honestly write Steve to be so incredible; he’s loving and affectionate and proud of being with Steph but he has his faults and sometimes he pushes and it doesn’t work. But he shows up and he is SO IN LOVE with Steph and it’s just a joy to read. 

He’s also, like, VERY into Steph being his wife? LOL he made mention of it more than once and it’s like, ‘Oh, so Steve has a kink.’ BUT WHAT A KINK! An amazing man who can’t WAIT to call you his wife! *swoon*

I loved Bucky popping up, scaring everyone, being proud and claiming Best Man status. Him and Steve’s friendship feels SO spot on because it isn’t just, like, them? I dunno if that makes sense but in a lot of fic I read, Bucky is THERE and works as a tool of sorts to push Steve towards the protagonist but then ... that’s it. Here, he’s his own person but also a big part of Steve’s life, and Steph WELCOMED him into the family and always makes SURE he is invited and a part of their lives too. I LOVE that you have INCLUDED Bucky and not just used him to further the plot. He feels real and fleshed out. And Steph confiding in him/asking him about the ever present threat that still lurks ... I’m glad you reminded me of what’s out there and what is (no doubt) going to come into play soon. Bucky’s such a reassuring and strong presence and I feel so much better knowing that he is looking out for the kids and Steph and STAYS vigilant. 

The surprise engagement party was crazy lol cuz I legit thought that Steph was about to walk into a ponderosa with Maria. Like, yeah, it was supposed to be a general get together, but I was SURE Maria was gonna see the ring and pull Steph aside and an emotional confrontation was going to happen. But it turned out so much happier. 

I will always and forever love Tony, and Steph’s assessment of him made me giggle

You always liked Tony - his brilliance and philanthropy, his bravery and loyalty to Steve, and even his sarcasm and petulance.  He was truly happy for you, and offered anything you needed to make the wedding happen whenever, wherever, and however you wanted.  He was really a sweet guy underneath all that iron.

Happy sigh. I feel like that’s a good sum up of the man. And that everyone chipped in to help put all this together ... Steph had literally JUST thought, “Huh. I don’t need fanfare this time around” only to have Steve put together ALL OF THE FANFARE lmaooooooooooooooooo But I LOVE that because it not only shows how enthused HE is about this, but that he always wants to do THE MOST just to see Steph appreciated and celebrated and happy. *dies* 

I come from a Latin family so tradition states a partner SHOULD ask for someone’s hand in marriage, so that Steve did that made me SWOOOOOOOOOOOON. It was a really great detail to work in. And, I mean, him AND TONY making sure her parents were there. Steve & Tony are an underrated duo I think sometimes; like, I know people ship them, but just as friends/teammates ... the things they are capable of when they are on the same page are just amazing. It made my heart hurt a little to think of them in this ‘Verse where they obvs work together and have a relationship :’| I appreciate that you are allowing me these glimpses and to enjoy that bit of business/relationship. 

And, shame on me, but I didn’t really think of informing like ... her ex? That’s not something that would’ve ever crossed my mind (cuz I’m like, why the Hell does he need to know?!?), so I thank you for constantly bringing me back to the fact that this is a big family that has a lot of moving parts and Steve, prince among men, is considerate of ALL of them. Imagining the girls screeching and screaming and asking all the questions  made me hiccup and cry cuz they wanted this for their mom probably as much as Steve did? LOL so now that they get to be a part of this, it must be SO exciting. 

Just a really warm, lovely, feel GREAT chapter. I worry cuz I know conflict has to be coming up and I STG IF HYDRA RUINS THE WEDDING, I WILL RAGE QUIT LIFE lolz 

Thank you again for this tale!!!

#feedback #fan fiction #Steve Rogers