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jeremichal-archive · 7 years

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what’s mine is yours and what’s yours is gone

hey hey hey guess who watched the minecraft sky factory videos fifty times and ended up getting inspired. *points at self* mE, I DID... so yeah, this is a lovely little thing I cooked up because I have no self-control and honestly we need more jeremichael fics. I hope y’all enjoy and let me know what you think!

(also I'm gonna tag @holographdick because I know you like jeremichael and anon-ed you once saying I'd write you some jeremichael, so I'm paying back what I owe)

Pairing: Jeremichael Warnings: Swearing & mentions of catatonic characters (they ain’t dead tho)

Jeremy doesn’t understand how Michael can sit so close to the ledge without being absolutely terrified.

The drop beneath them is huge, ridiculous, stupid; and yet, Michael’s ass is planted on the edge of the wooden platform, his legs dangling off into the abyss below him with little care for his own safety. Jeremy wants to pull him back, grab him by his collar and drag him back within the bounds of the wooden fence that Geoff built for them, but he knows Michael won't appreciate that. He knows he’s just paranoid, he knows that this feeling will settle once Ryan figures out how to heal, fix, cure Jack and Geoff; but until then, Jeremy doesn’t want Michael anywhere near the edge.

Out of the corner of his eye, he watches Gavin scramble his way up one of their newly grown oaks. He grabs for the branches widely, carelessly with little to no planning of his path and Jeremy can’t help but grit his teeth. Ryan is busy with the sieve behind him- cursing every few moments under his breath- and Jeremy can guess that he’s trying to sift through their reserve of gravel for something useful. Neither of them seems to care about Michael, neither of them seem bothered enough to ask him to come back away from the edge- so that makes it Jeremy’s job.

Careful steps, slow steps- there’s no way he’s going to let himself fall off into the abyss- he makes his way over to Michael. Closer now, Jeremy can follow Michael’s line of sight to the stars above them, eyes flickering between the planets with a frown etched into his features.

“I’m pretty sure that’s Earth,” he mumbles softly and Jeremy can’t help but freeze. He watches his friend lift his arm to point up towards the sky. “I’m talking ‘bout that- that green and blue one. I’m like ninety percent sure that’s Earth.” When he looks back over his shoulder at Jeremy, his eyes are glassy.

“Come away from the edge, Michael,” is all he says and God, his voice is barely above a whisper. Things aren't… sitting right within him right now; things aren’t like they used to be. Their base isn’t safe anymore, not that it really was, to begin with, but now- Jeremy can’t help but look at and pick out all of its flaws. The gaps in the fences, the holes in the floor- Jeremy knows that when Ryan figures out how to create lava, their little wooden home-base won't stand a chance. It's terrifying, but stone is hard to create and Jeremy knows there are better uses for it instead of as a flooring.

“It’s Earth, right Lil J? You remember, right?” he tries again and the best Jeremy can do is nod. “Oh good. What- what about that one?-” he moves his hand to the left- “do you know that one's name, Jeremy? The little red one.”

“Please Michael. I don’t- I don’t want you to fall off again,” he mumbles and the smile Michael offers him in return is like a punch to the stomach.

“I won't, I promise. What’s the little red one’s name, Jeremy?” he insists and Jeremy sucks in a breath.

“Mercury, Michael.”

“Oh yeah… do you- do you know all of their names, Jeremy?” he asks and Jeremy stares up at the sky. There’s shuffling from behind him and then the cool silk of Gavin’s scarf brushes against his bare arm. He shivers.

“I used to,” he replies and Michael hums softly.

“What was Earth like?” Gavin asks, and Jeremy bites at the inside of his cheek, hard enough to draw blood. He can’t remember most of it, but what he can makes his stomach turn inside out. The warmth, the steadiness, the way he could take twenty steps to the left without worrying about falling off the damned thing. It was better, he knows that, but he’s unsure if he would ever go back if he were given the chance.

“Warm,” is all he replies, though, cause he’s not quite sure he could say any more without his voice breaking. The question tumbles out of his mouth before he can think better of it, “What was falling like?”

Ryan’s the one who answers him. “Cold.”

Jeremy almost rolls his eyes, almost calls Ryan an asshole for deliberately feeding his own answer right back at him- but he doesn’t because Ryan’s different now. Jeremy’s not the only one who’s currently not sitting right, he’s not the only one that’s a little off balance. Jack and Geoff are gone- physically they’re still there, both of their bodies lying side by side in the small bed Gavin crafted- but mentally, nothing. They don’t talk, they don’t eat; they don’t move, they don’t sleep. The four of them don’t know why and they can’t attribute it to the fall- because while Geoff tumbled into the darkness along with Michael, Gavin and Ryan- Jack didn’t.

Jeremy had watched, he’d watched the floor disappear out from underneath them all and had heard their screams of panic. He watched four of his friends disappear into the darkness below him, only for them to reappear next to him a few moments later- only, different.

Different as in: Jeremy rushing to Michael’s side, only for Michael to reply with, “Who are you?” when he tries to touch him.

Different as in: Jeremy catching sight of Gavin’s wide eyes, staring off into the abyss around them as if he doesn’t quite understand how he got there.

Different as in: Ryan flinching away from human contact with a frown as Jack tries to check him for any injuries.

Different as in: Geoff pacing around what little of the platform they have left, panicked mutterings slipping past his lips.

And then, not even two minutes later, Jack and Geoff just cease to be. They just stop, bodies collapsing into a heap onto the wooden planks and Jeremy’s heart sinks when he realises he’s left with three other people who don’t remember him.

So it's different now. He can’t banter so easily with Ryan, can’t press up against Michael’s side with a grin and he can’t play fight with Gavin without getting a real, honest punch in return- because they aren’t quite used to Jeremy’s playful intentions anymore. They don't know him, not like he knows them. He hates it.

Ryan’s attention drifts away from him at the same time Gavin wanders back to his tree, and then he’s just left with Michael- who is still too close to the edge. Jeremy’s fingers itch to bury themselves in his curls, to tug his head back and smile down at the other man. Exchange affection like they used to, back when Ryan would growl at them good-naturedly for touching the leaves on their shared tree. Little touches, little compliments. Anything.

But he doesn’t.

Michael’s gaze flickers away from him, back to the planets illuminating the sky and Jeremy sighs, glancing away from him.

“Sit next to me,” he mumbles and Jeremy can’t help but suck in a breath. He wants to, oh God does he want to, but he doesn’t think he could handle being so close to the edge. While falling doesn’t necessarily mean death- although things could be different for Jeremy- he still doesn’t want to go over the edge. He doesn’t want to fall, he doesn’t want to fall, he doesn’t want to- Michael’s hand slips into his, snapping him out of his thoughts as their fingers intertwine. He tugs at his arm gently, trying to pull him down and Jeremy can’t help but follow the silent order. The slight edge of shock and the pathetically desperate way he misses Michael’s touch makes him easily malleable against Michael’s will.

He lowers himself to the floor, staying close to Michael's side and reluctantly lets his legs dangle off the edge. He doesn’t look down. He doesn’t dare risk it.

“I can barely remember it, Jeremy. It happened so fast, didn’t quite understand what was happening till it was too late,” he whispers and Jeremy tenses. “Things before that are blank, I don’t remember what I was doing before I fell. I don’t remember who I was and why I was there. But-” he sucks in a shaky breath- “but I do remember, I remember thinking as I fell, ‘God, I hope Jeremy’s okay.’”

A whimper slips past his lips at Michael’s words and Jeremy can’t help but deliberately turn his face away. But Michael doesn’t let him get away so easily, he twists his body and follows him; he grabs for Jeremy’s thigh, pressing his face into the crook of his neck, humming lowly.

“What were we, Jeremy? Before I fell?” he asks and Jeremy’s heart stops beating.

Lovers. Soulmates. Partners.

No.

“Friends,” is what he ultimately settles on and no matter how much he hates it, it's technically true. They never quite pushed things further between them, instead, they just let themselves sit comfortably on the edge between playful teasing and flirting. Looking back on it now, Jeremy hates himself for it. He missed his chance, he missed his fucking chance because his Michael is gone now. And Jeremy doesn’t think he’s ever going to come back.

“Why don’t I believe you,” Michael mumbles back. His fingers absentmindedly stroke along the inseam of Jeremy’s pants and every little touch sends electricity shooting up his spine. Michael’s hand is both simultaneously way too high and way too low, and Jeremy doesn’t know how to fix it.

This isn’t his Michael, he tries to remind himself.

But does that even really matter, though? he hesitates.

“Why do I feel at home whenever I’m around you, Lil J? Why does the ache in my chest disappear whenever I touch you? Why do I always end up gravitating towards you?” he whispers and his fingers still momentarily; But they’re still there on his thigh and Jeremy can still feel them, warm fingertips selfishly burning their way into his memory forever.

Does Michael know what he’s doing to him? Does Michael know that Jeremy’s falling apart right beside him?

“Why do I desperately want to kiss you right now, Jeremy, if we were only friends before,” he asks and Jeremy whines low in his throat.

Yeah, Michael knows.

“Michael- Michael, you shouldn’t,” he whispers back, breath catching in his throat.

“Why?”

“Because you don’t know who I am.”

“But I did, and I will again- so why wait for the inevitable, Jeremy when I can have you now.”

And then Michael kisses him.

It's hard to describe, but if Jeremy had to compare the feeling to something, he would almost assume he was falling. Right off the edge, tumbling into the darkness- but the funny thing is, he can’t find it in himself to care. Michael’s lips press against his- softly, gently, carefully- and his eyes involuntarily flutter shut, and the rest of the world just fades away. It's just them, it's just them, it's just them and Jeremy wants it to stay that way forever.

When Michael pulls away, Jeremy chases after him, but Michael doesn’t give in. He sucks in a deep breath and smiles, something that's a little too smug for Jeremy’s liking. It's something that his Michael would’ve done if they had kissed. And something clicks in Jeremy’s mind.

This is his Michael now.

“Yeah, I was right. I knew I didn’t want to wait for that,” Michael replies and Jeremy leans forward, resting his head against Michael’s shoulder.

“Come away from the edge, Michael,” he whispers and Michael’s fingers trail across the back of his neck.

“Yeah, good idea Lil J,” he mumbles back, “don’t want to fall off. Not again. Not now.”

#jeremichael #holographdick #mine

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