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rinbowaman · 9 months

Note

hi, this is my first time sending an ask I really don't know how stuff here works jdjsjs but i have body dysmorphia and lately it's been getting worse so will it be possible to write something for ethan/heeseung where he finds out y/n is on a diet or is skipping meals because she has put on a few pounds & feels insecure, like she refuses to sit on heeseung's lap because she thinks he will notice her weight gain, tries to suck her stomach in and usually heeseung goes with her when she wants to shop for new lingerie or clothes but she's too embarrassed because her size increased so she refuses to take him or uk? things like that. I'm sorry if these type of scenarios are triggering for u and it's perfectly fine if u don't write them🤍

My sweet anon, I have decided to put your ask ahead of the line bc i feel like the drabble/heethans message is crucial for you to read and for everyone to see because i can't stress the fact that while I may not know you, see you, or hear your voice, trust me when i say you are perfect and beautiful the way you are. i'll let you read first and add on to my notes on the bottom ;) but i hope you enjoy this and that i succeeded in giving you what you were expecting. sorry this isn't proofread because i had to do this piece on my phone in my moms car as we were driving around running errands. but i hope its still a good read ( i personally think it is) <3

warnings: body dysmorphia, thoughts of anorexia, starving yourself, refusing to eat, self body shaming, insecurities, fear of body shaming, i think that's it.

"Masterpiece"

Sitting at his desk, Heeseung types away, grading papers and completing the tasks for his professor as the teacher's assistant. Its a good thing he gains extra credit and extreme leverage with the staff at the college, otherwise there would be no appeal in participating in this program.

Walking up to his mini fridge, you opened the door and grabbed two water bottles. Atop of the fridge were some snacks, and for a moment you thought it be harmless to munch on a few sweet potato chips, but feeling how heavy your gut was shunned you from the idea.

You hand him a water, to which he looks up and smiled at you delightfully as he takes it. "Huh, thanks baby." wrapping his arm around your hips, he pulls you in as he looks at the screen, yet your reflexes and instinct caused your body to shift movement and roll right out of his arm. Twirling like a ballerina, you played it off as you sat on his bed and issued a half hearted chuckle as you sipped your water.

Raising his brows and giving a confused chuckle, he merely found it playful and let you be as he continued grading his papers. Finally when he was finished, he stretched his arms and legs, and eyed you down as he watched you reading some articles on your phone.

Sitting himself next to you on the bed, his hands make their way on to your waist, and you jolted as you tried to move away once you felt him lifting you to sit you on his lap.

"no wait...!"

Looking at you with a raised brow and wide eyes, he took your hesitancy as he normally did. "Playing hard to get again?" biting his lip, he chuckles, "You know that only fuels me.....does pretty baby wanna be chased?" he leans in and teases as he nuzzles his face into your neck. "you can ruuuuuuun but you can't hiiiiiiiide."

You peeled yourself away and scooted into the opposite corner of the bed where you cradled your legs to your chest, and gave him a bold faced lie. "I think i might be starting shark week soon.....i'm feeling lots of cramps and pain....i just cant right now."

Avoiding eye contact, you slightly bit your lip as you spoke, feeling the somewhat perturbed look he was giving you. "....okay. did you need me to pick you up some stuff from the store?"

Shaking your head, you remained turned away as you continued to shun yourself away.

"well come here and let me hold you at least."

"no......its fine."

"oh i wasn't asking y/n."

"heeseung no!"

Pulling you against your wishes, he lays you down as he spoons you and grabs the remote, "its okay y/n, how many times do i have to tell you, I dont mind if you get blood on me. its no big deal."

But it was a big deal......because you weren't about to start your menstrual cycle nor were you feeing any cramps, the only pain you were feeling were that from hunger. You don't know how, but you had recently gained five pounds and ever since, you hadn't looked at yourself the same. Every time you see yourself in the mirror, you shun away, swearing that you looked much swollen than the previous day. Not to mention, the amount of water weight you were containing from all the restrictions you were placing on your diet. Since you began starving yourself, your body had reacted by storing more water, thus, you even began drinking less, causing yourself to feel dehydrated.

Over the next week and a half, you hardly ate, claiming you didn't have an appetite at all, in which Heeseung would give you a perplexed and concerned look, figuring that it was all due to your menstrual cycle that you kept using as an excuse to avoid his touch and food.

"huh....shark week this time around must really be bad.....i'll at least go get you some soup and some water." he would tell you, always remembering that during your menstrual cycle, you would get certain cravings for snacks and was always thirsty.

The hunger pains were excruciating, yet the moment you had to suck in your breath just to squeeze in your jeans, you felt like you needed to do more to shed the weight off.

the other day, you and heeseugn walked through the mall, peeking into a variety of shops, to include clothing boutiques. as you walked through the store, you reminded yourself that you needed to get some new undergarments. walking ahead, you looked around until you found the lingerie department. Thankfully Heeseung didn't seem to notice how you avoided looking at any of the pieces, trying not to give off any bit of interest and risking him wanting to see you in it. trying to distract him, you asked if he wouldn't mind going to the other end of the store to get you some slippers. to which he declined as he refused to let you out of his sight.

"but....we can knock two birds with one stone if you would go grab it while i get a couple of thins from here."

"its fine, grab whatever you need and we'll go get your slippers right after."

"but......"

"y/n.....i said go get your things."

harshly snapping your arms across your chest, you shut yourself out and murmured out "i change my mind, i dont want anything from here, lets just go."

"what the hell is wrong with you?"

"nothing, i just....i just dont really need anything from here, they dont have what i'm looking for."

shaking his head as he rolled his eyes, he takes your hand and falls into your pool of lies.

After another week had passed over, you swore you didn't look the same as you had, did you gain more weight? why did your jeans and tops feel tighter? With the sudden image in your head of how swollen your body must have looked, you took things further by avoiding water and food altogether, committing to acts such as pretending to eat, or claiming the food wasn't tasting right at the restaurant. At the theater, every time Heeseung handed you the popcorn as he often would get you both a large bucket to share, you reached in and grabbed a few kernal's but hid them in your pocket or in your empty drink cup instead of eating it. You had done your best to remain inconspicuous of the matter.

"Does he think i look different? what if i gain weight and he might think i look fat? will he leave me? what am i going to do?"

Each time you looked in the mirror, your hands would travel and pinch out rolls of skin from your tummy, thighs, under arms, and even on your cheek. You swore that you not only saw the weight, you could now feel it in between your fingers as you snagged on skin and bits of fat content from your body at random. Deciding to take it up a notch, you even started to commit to cardio exercises while avoiding calories and water altogether, barely munching on a cube of cheese every 48 hours when the hunger pains began to be too much.

With the amount of water you were avoiding, your skin began to look sunken and rather dull, yet it didnt matter, you needed to refrain from anything that would allow you to gain another pound. You avoided the scale, only opting to glance at the mirror from time to time which had caused your mind and heart to shatter, because despite the fact that you were starving and dehydrating yourself, you swore your body had looked immensely bigger than the day before.

"I look fatter.....i can't, maybe instead of cheese....i'll munch on a grape or a piece of carrot.....i'll just drink a half a bottle water next time."

Your mind was racing, the only thing you could think about was how you hated your body and the way it looked from whenever you would peek over to look in the mirror.

The day that you dreaded the most finally came when heeseung became relentless, as usual, and was adamant about touching his "pretty baby" after not being able to enjoy you for a full week from 'shark week'.

"Come here."

"no heeseung no!"

"Oooooh yes.....come here......"

"no...please stop!"

"being tenacious about this whole cat and mouse thing aren't you?" he smirks, teasing and mistaking your hesitant reaction as a playful gesture of toying with him. Leaning into your ear, he whispers "where you gonna run? hmm?" following his words, he sucks on your helix.

It wasn't until his hands traveled upward and slid under your shirt, touching your skin. You jolted out of his grasp and shouted "NO!!!!!!"

Lifting his head up, grabbing onto your wrists and displaying a harsh, and rather angry look on his face, he sternly warned you.

"........did you just fucking scream at me?" biting his lip down and hissing, Heeseung expressed his intolerance of your behavior. Never have you ever shouted at him to that degree, and he wasn't going to take it.

"do i need to punish you or teach you a lesson? hmm? am i too nice? because if you want me to be mean about it, i can. which way do you want it y/n?" his words and his tone were harsh, he stared into your eyes with a look of displeasure and anger. With tears forming in your eyes, you began to sob.

his expression never changed, in fact, he merely spat out even harsher words as he taunted you.

"cry all you want, it's not going to change a damn thing. you know that, right? so fucking pick how you want it, and say you're sorry already, because one way or another, you're going to get wrecked."

with the already set intention of punishing you for your discretion of shouting at him, you sobbed hard as you turned your face away and whimpered out...

"i'm.......i'm....just.....i'm hungry......."

raising his brow, he shifted his eyes up and around, reflecting his mind working as he leaned his head slightly inward. With furrowed brows, his expression remained reflecting anger and annoyance, yet his tone was rather confused as he bid you to elaborate. "what?....."

you sobbed and whimpered out your cries as you broke down, all the while Heeseung had you pinned down under his frame.

"I'm hungry.....i'm mad.....i'm upset and i just....i feel so weak. the headaches wont go away and they're getting worse, i can't....i .......i cant....."

His expression grew even more stern as you continued to throw out words that only confused him. It was angry, yet.....he only looked angry because he couldn't understand.

"What are you..." stopping at mid sentence, he props himself up while pinning your arms to your sides. Leaning his head in as he remained hovered over you, he grabs your chin and forces you to look at him.

"Breathe, y/n. Breathe, deep breaths...." he guides you as your panting gasps from sobbing so hard became unbreakable at a high pattern of rapid bursts.

"shhhh.....breeeeathe....." his tone softens, bidding as he guided you, you started to relax your breathing and breathed deeply as he committed in getting you to relax. "that's it.........slowly........there...."

Once you had finally calmed down, the streams of your tears continued to fall down, despite your bursts of sobs coming to an end.

"Now.....from the top, tell me what is wrong."

"...........I can't.......i just......i'm so..."

".....hungry?" he raises a perplexed brow as he leans his face in, flaring a slight bit of an attitude as he gave an expecting look to you.

"yes......"

"and.......why are you hungry?" with a tone that hinted he was aiming towards something, he was forcing the information out of you as he coaxed you into opening up.

"........i wasn't.......i wasn't on shark week....."

taking a deep breath in, he looked at you as he blinked in disbelief. "......what?"

"I wasn't.....i.......i had gained weight and.......i hate the way i feel......the way i look......."

shifting his eyes from left to right, reflecting his confused state, he leaned over to his propped arm as he shifted his free hand over to his mouth and stroked his chin. "....so all this time....when we were out.....the restaurants and the theaters, all those times-" cutting himself off, he rubbed his forehead and sighed out "fuck...." as he rubbed his temples. he noticed that you weren't eating, yet your constant white lie of telling him that you were on shark week, or that you remained bloated after the fact because of the water weight, had directed him to believe you and causing him to think that you merely were just skipping out on a meal or two, not days or weeks worth.

"when was the last time you ate y/n?"

shamefully, you couldn't even remember the last time you ate a small meal, let alone a full one. going on nearly two weeks, you had barely munched on anything, even a mere snack.

"i....i dont know...."

"you dont know?....how the fuck? what have you been doing? have you eaten anything?" he snaps as he looked at you with wide eyes.

"....i.......i eat a piece of cheese and half a water..."

with his mouth parting slightly, he watched as you start to shamefully sob once more.

"......what did you do to the sandwich at the bakery earlier? he asked.

"i.......i threw it out when you weren't looking...." you admitted, shamefully apologizing as you recounted to pretending to eat on some of the occasions that heeseung went to take you to a shop for lunch or dinner. you had become so crafty in telling white lies and hiding the fact that you weren't eating, not even he noticed your lack of nutritional consumption.

Rubbing his temples harder, he gazed at you with wide eyes. ".....why?" he calmly asks.

"Because i hate the way i look.........i've gained weight and i cant take it!" you gasped out as you sobbed out hard.

letting you sob, he continued to look down at you and patiently waited for you to get everything out of your system. once your cryings came to a standstill, he gently tones out "you done?"

With a harsh expression, you looked at him with furrowed brows. how could he be so heartless? you were struggling and you both knew you were unhealthy, not just physically but you were struggling mentally to gain positivity of your image, yet he had no compassion in his voice or his words.

"....w-what?" you stuttered out.

"I said 'are you done?'....or do you need to cry some more?" he asks, still reflecting a harsh look on his face.

looking at him, you shifted your gaze down, feeling too confused, somewhat angry and hurt by his lack of sincerity on the matter. in fact, it had distracted you so much that you truly were done crying.

"looks like you are. get up." lifting himself off of you, he grabs his cap and pulls you off the bed, handing you your jacket.

"wh....where are we-"

"come on." cutting you off, he takes your arm and applied harsh force as he dragged you out of the house and into his car.

"stop! i dont want anything! i'm not eating anything, i wont!" you snapped out, figuring he was taking you to go and feed you.

"shuddap y/n and get in the fucking car before i make you." he sighs out as he inadvertently swallows his words and pushes your head down, shoving you in the passenger seat.

driving, you were somewhat surprised that he passed by a series of eatery spots that you both frequently visited. You grew even more confused when he took you to the international museum of art down town.

parking the car and buying the tickets, you figured he was taking you to the museum to get your mind off things. yet his forceful mannerisms remained as he dragged you passed each cultural zone, passing nearly every exhibit.

"why did we come here if we're just going to walk pass everything?" you inquired somewhat irritated from being pulled around, not to mention him never once turning back and giving you an answer.

"what are you doing?" you gasped out as he walked fast paced, dragging you closely behind. still being unresponsive, he continued to pull you through the crowds as he took you to the set destination that he had in mind to show you.

Walking passed a series of statues, walls adorned with cultural masks from Africa, another was draped with silk wall paintings from Asia, he swiftly pulls you past each exhibit, causing you to wonder where exactly he was bringing you to. taking sharp corners, walking up a myriad of stairs, you started to lose your breath as he continued to drag you behind, walking through the halls of scenic crafts that the museum was known for.

finally coming to a pause in his steps, after bringing you across the other end of the large building, he pulls you by his side and wraps his arm around your waist as he pointed towards a massive wall and calmly instructs you to "look."

Looking over in the direction of where he was pointing, you witnessed a wide display of paintings decorating the wall.

Narrowing down to one specific painting, he pulls you in and brings you in front of the portrait.

"who is she?" you asked while studying the painting.

"That's Cleopatra, known throughout history as the most beautiful woman in the world. she was 4'11 in height, and carried enough weight to conceal some of her pregnancies." he sharply stated. Looking up at him, you portrayed a rather blank expression as he continued to stare at the painting and opened up on his pensive thought aloud.

"One thing I'll never understand, is how can we as people, claim to be more progressive, understanding, and wise in today's day in age, more so than we were back hundreds of years ago? we tell and teach each children to not discriminate, yet we do it all the time to ourselves. There is nothing in the world that is more diverse than beauty itself, it is the most ethical and divergent concept in the entire universe, but somehow, we can't learn to embrace the varied notion behind it. We can't accept the belief that it comes in all forms and variants. We sometimes look at ourselves and can't find happiness or comfort, because we place restrictions and shame on what is actually beautiful and meaningful. It might be because of our upbringing, fashion, media, or ....shit, it could even be our own parents or friends....it could be anything these days. But one thing i know for sure baby, is that you're more than perfect the way you are, even if you gained some weight. it never bugged me, in fact, i think it brings a more feminine quality to your body."

Shocked with a wide eyed expression, you looked up at him and inquired for him to elaborate his statement. "You......knew?"

Smirking at you while rolling his eyes, he pulled you close to his side. "Y/n......when are you ever going to get it through to your head girl, i love you and i'm crazy about you, and i pay close attention because i find myself wanting to see, taste, hear, and experience more of you. so yeah, i knew, and i see nothing but goodness in it, plus i care more about your comfort, i have no reason to be concerned so long as you are happy. listen to me really closely when i tell you baby, these women all made history and shaped the world, they all carried different skin tones, body shapes, sizes and status, but the one thing they all had in common was their beauty, and you, are the ideal reflection of each and every single one of them and what they stood for. i can understand if you may want to change something about yourself, if you're not happy about gaining weight or you don't feel comfortable, that's fine. I'm not going to try and change your mind, just be healthy about it, eat well and exercise. but if you wanna take my word for it, the way you are right now, even if you had gained more weight, gain twenty more pounds for all i care, i see nothing but a masterpiece. if today's society would have remained just as it did hundreds of years ago, where people were smart, philosophical, and creative, you would have been looked at and idolized as art........you are.....art." he trailed off, as he held your hand and gave you a reassured smile.

"Don't think you have to change a thing about yourself......you're my Cleopatra, and every single second of the day when i get to look at you, i think of these portraits and wished to God that i could paint one of you to hang up on this very same wall. you belong with these women.....you've earned your place among them." squeezing your hand gently, he kisses the top of your head.

He was right, if you truly wanted to change and shed the weight you've gained, there was a way to do it, yet suddenly after hearing him talk and feeling his touch and kiss, you didn't mentally place so much emphasis on your body anymore. thinking about the weight gain didn't have the same affect on you, you didn't feel shameful, gross, or discomfort, quite the opposite in fact, you were now beginning to see the good qualities of the weight gain. Your curves were more full, giving you a more feminine appeal, which Heeseung had loved. your skin was softer, and your face was far more youthful looking as your cheeks had a nice supple shape. you were still as beautiful to him since the day he saw you, and that itself had made you happier than ever. heeseung didn't love you because of the weight gain, he loved you for you, and everything that comes after only made him love you more.

smirking back, you joked back a response. "so......if i want to change my hair......and cut it really short, will you let me?" you chuckled out.

"no." he gently laughs out. "there are some things that should just not be altered......like the beauty of the world..... your face......your hair, your sense of style, your personality, and your good nature. i want those to stay forever.....in fact, i want you to stay forever." pulling you in, he places a long kiss on your forehead.

"lets go grab something to eat, and if you want, tomorrow i can take you to the gym on campus. Only if you want to."

shaking your head, you calmly tell him as you hug him back, while staring at the painting of the Egyptian queen. "no......i feel better......if i change my mind i'll let you know......but i am good now.......thank you."

placing another kiss on your head, he whispers "good girl. from now on, if something is bothering you, come talk to me and we can fix it together....if it even needs fixing.....i love you and i see nothing but perfection within you." with another kiss, he stares back up at the painting, where you both admired for a while before leaving the museum.

Of course, one trip to the museum wasn't going to fix your problem overnight, you suffered at feeling shameful and anxiety from looking at your reflection, but it didn't hurt so bad....now that you had Heeseung to remind you nearly every day how beautiful you were to him; little by little, he was healing you. There were even times where he would participate in the healing process and would get you both a healthy salad for lunch, salmon for dinner, take you on a long nature walk, or maybe even take you to go swimming at the pool at the college. never being forceful about it, heeseung was bringing out the highlight of your energy and focus, and relocating your mentality to all the activities, causing you to focus less on the images and thoughts of your body. at the end of each event, he'd kiss you lovingly as he reminded how good you were to him, always reminding you when you needed to hear it most.....

"you're a masterpiece. if Gods own angels combined their efforts with the greatest painters and architects, they still couldn't make something more beautiful than you. i could have a hundred variations of you, and it still wouldn't even be enough, i need you in my sight all the time, you're everything to me. so let me feast. let me fall in love all over again......let me appreciate and love the lines and curves of you, and let me kiss every single inch of you, the more of you there is, the happier i'll be. because i want to kiss you more...i want to love you more....i want to fuck you more. i just want more......so let me have more of you....let me have all of you......let me have you the way you are now and let me have what you will become in the future days that come forth. dont deprive me of that......just let me have you.....y/n. I promise, you're always going to have me."

-fin-

authors notes: i ran into a girl one time who was bald, completely hairless, but i didn't even pay any mind bc the only thing i could focus on was how happy she was that she was alive and well. she had the biggest smile on her face and i had found that to be the most beautiful thing i had ever seen. my mom and i both nearly cried because it was so beautiful. we also saw an article of a former beauty queen and pageant title holder who had only one leg bc she had something that required her to get the other amputated, yet she was promoting how happy she was to be alive and well. i'm recounting this bc there are days (i am only human after all) there are days where i find something about myself that i actually detest and i even at one point, had convinced myself that i was someday going to get a boob job bc when i was 14, i absolutely had fat content on my body whatsoever, literally a walking skeleton and all the girls at school had such beautiful feminine curves. I remember there was a boy that i kind of had a crush on, but when my friends were teasing and told him "what if reina says she likes you?" boy flat out said "i dont like skinny girls, especially boobless ones." (it was something along the lines of that, i can't remember the exact verbiage) and it shattered my heart lol. i used to tell my mom every day that year, that when i become an adult and i get a job and make my own money, the first thing i was going to do was get breast implants. but oddly enough, when i turned 16, i started to get a little something....not as much as i would like, but i have more than what i had at that age and honestly, i found myself to be happy with it, especially being 19 now. i find myself changing and caring about things i never cared about before, and not caring about things that i used to care about. its so weird how that works. but one thing i will tell you, what matters is that you're healthy, safe, adn happy. i hope you overcome your trials and become stronger, physically, mentally, and emotionally, and i hope that heethan's message will help you with that. because i do believe you are a work of art ;) i personally think we all are....women are just the prettier sex to me, so i find women, no matter how she is built, to be fascinating and beautiful. <3

Enjoyed this piece? Show love and treat your girl to a cup of coffee. ♥️

☕ Ko-fi: ko-fi.com/reinbow

#enha x reader #heeseung x reader #heeseung scenarios #heeseung fanfic #enha heeseung #heeseung fluff #heeseung imagines #enhypen heeseung #heeseung au #heeseung enhypen #heeseung ff

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milkybonya · 2 years

Note

Ahhh Milky I hope you're having a good last week! It's unfortunate you can't do more during your last week but I'm sure packing is very time consuming and saying good bye is so important! I hope your flight home goes smoothly too btw!! When I studied abroad I had a layover in turkey which took me in the wrong direction from getting back home so it ended up being like a 12 hour flight home when it could've been 8 😭 it wasn't very fun 😭 I'm sure it'll be really long coming home all the way from Korea. I hope you're able to sleep well or stay entertained~

I have exciting news! Or well it isn't that exciting but I've really started learning Korean now! I was doing it very casually earlier, but now I've installed the Korean keyboard and I'm trying to write little mini letters to Kingdom all in my own Korean! I used to solely use a translator even for short messages bc I couldn't spell or anything 😭 but I'm taking my duolingo more seriously and I'm actually making a lot of progress! I was able to tell Kingdom that I love them and introduce myself but I also did more complex things (at least imo LOL) like say their songs are cool~ I felt so proud of myself hehe one of the members who speaks English cheered my message where I told him I was going to write out a short message to him in Korean and then I did it and I'm just 🥰 Dann is our polyglot king so for him to cheer me on (literally) was so special. This might be a silly question, but what was your favorite word/phrase that you learned while in Korea??? Like it made you feel cool to know it or you were proud of yourself for learning it. I wanna feel cool too hehe 😎 Milky는 멋있습니다 😎

And now, comments on the smau 🤩 why is no one commenting on sunwoo's destroyed can??? 😭😭 It was just in there and everyone was like yep nothing to see here LOL but I mean it is fair that reader not liking rapunzel is a CRIME that's one of my favorites 😭😭😭 and like YES I'm biased bc she has a reptile but STILL I uwu over her and Flynn's romance so like.. I love it. Also reader calling Younghoon a hag LOL I love that they are Savage 🤩 also Eric is so funny like "I'm just covering my arms so you won't fall for me" ITS TRUE THO??? Eric is unofficially my bias wrecker with sunwoo (idk why I say unofficially like.. They always have my attention when watching mvs jfjdsj) and I WOULD fall in love with him don't test me 😭 I'm excited for changmin to come into things~ it'll be so cute, I know it!! And pls slow burn is the best 😭 I'm sooooo excited 🤩 you're going to make my heart yearn for love I just know it jdjsj

Oh and Im glad seeing treasure was so fun!! I'm sure it was heartbreaking to see only 10 of them up there :(( I'm just glad they were still glowing and full of energy for you 🥰 I hope your sunburn is doing better by the way!! I'm sure it is by now since it's been a while since you responded, but I hope it wasn't too painful for the first few days! I haven't gotten a sunburn in ages thankfully but all that does is attest to me never going outside LOL what songs did they perform?? Do you have any pictures?? I'd love to see them 🤩

Sending you lots of love!! Here's a Stalin pic for you hehe he crawled into my banana flavored candle (we call it the banandle) and did a "banana split" LOL he smelled like banana after I took him out lol he's so silly~ love you!

okay tumblr. pls dont delete my reply to my bestie's ask this time. there i'm manifesting that it won't be deleted >:O i was so mad it has taken me days to come back and reply T-T

but even though i was a bit busy packing during my last week, i still had a lot of fun and squeezed a few things in ! also,,,, the universe just aligned and i ended up getting accepted for kard's comeback showcase, which was 3 days before my flight,, and again by luck i was front row! kard are actually my ults and finally meeting them after 6 years and their 2 year hiatus meant to world to me T-T and then each member gave a polaroid away to someone in the crowd and i received Jseph's T--T so insane..

but layovers are confusing and the worst ㅎㅁㅎ that's why i feel so lucky we found a flight without one! so even if it was long and rough, we at least were not so confused <3

waHHH you're learning korean?! i'm so proud T-T learning a language takes a lot, especially when the country you live in doesn't speak it, and i'm especially touched that kingdom have become a motivation for you to learn this new language :")

ah! rather than learning any big cool phrases, i found learning smaller things like how to greet a restaurant owner or store worker goodbye cool. ah but!! i find it interesting that to ask if someone has eaten, you say have you eaten rice? (밥을 먹었어요?) rather than have you eaten food? (음식을 먹었어요?) because rice is such an important part of the korean diet that rice is the equivalent of food and vice versa :D

p.s. Kelsey 씨도 멋있어용~

omg the smau :(( i wanna say thank you for always commenting on it even though it's so messy and slow aH i appreciate you saying you like the slow though!! now that Changmin has finally been introduced officially, i wonder what you'll think :O

seeing treasure as 10 was so good definitely!!!! even though Mashidam were gone, the rest of them did so well <33 and you're so sweet ahh the sunburn healed quickly !

(i figured out why tumblr deleted my reply to your ask--the treasure festival photos didn't save to the ask properly and it ruined everything T-T so imma just direct message them to you hehe)

STALIN IS SO CUTE AND TINY IN THAT CANDLE I COULD CRY!! also omg i love banana scent/flavouring 🥺 so i just know i would live the banandle (i love the name) as much as Stalin hehe,,

i love you and Stalin so much and hope you have a good weekend!! ♡

#yutopiada talks #baekhyuns lipchain ;3;#beloved kelsey ♡#milky's moots

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