#it may sound messy but i just can't structure my thoughts better than this. maybe later

[ktyekmrf30]

I know there are still 3 episodes left, including the cursed 11 episode where is always The Drama (TM), but for now I can say that I'm really happy with the fact that the main hidden agenda (again, at this exact moment) for JokeZo turned out to be just Pat helping Joke with info about his friend behind friend's back.

Because sometimes it's just that simple. Sometimes it's not something so big and dramatic or stunt-planned that it can ruin your whole life or your relationship with someone and etc. Sometimes it's just one phrase or one action. Or the lack of it.

Zo already had traumatic experience with Puen and other friend where he was hurt because one friend laughed at him and the other one refused him. Loss of trust. So if a similar situation happened with Joke and Pat but without processing the trauma with help from the outside, Zo could definitely break down.

At one of the sessions with my therapist I remembered a situation from many years ago where I was really uncomfortable but my friend was okay with how things are going so I didn't attach any importance to this and decided to forget about it in the name of our friendship (spoiler: it didn’t work and breakup was awful). When in similar situation that happened last year another friend of mine expressed a similar position towards some things - and for him it was just bad word choosing - I was not prepared for it. It broke me to the point that I needed help. For 3 months in a row I cried non-stop at every session, because I couldn't work through this trauma in time. My friend didn't mean it like that but I just couldn't see the difference anymore. And it was just few words that literally broke me into pieces.

And Zo is in a similiar situation actually and it's his friends actions. But, unlike me, he has worked through his trauma with similiar behavior pattern. And it became possible only thanks to Joke. Joke is the help from outside. Because dialogue is always about two people who take steps towards each other. If one person stands still while another one walks towards him, the first one will get tired. Is this disappointment necessary in a relationship?

Zo learned to trust Joke, his words and actions, allowed him to violate his boundaries but do it with respect and only on the terms that Zo allowed. The ones he was ready to accept at that moment. And Joke respected it, Zo knows it too, he saw it multiple times.

And Joke, unlike Puen, didn't hide his feelings. Joke literally wanted to scream about his feelings and at some point he did it because it seems that everybody in the uni already knows that he loves Zo. And although he himself faced the problem of not being able to correctly express his feelings in words, he still did it. I believe it also helped Zo see the difference and helped to stop comparing situations or people. And this also helped to calm down later, after the thing with Pat was revealed.

The whole culmination of their trust-building journey through food and time together was in ep 8, when instead of a declaration of love, during the bed scene - the words you'd expect to hear in a romantic bed setting is I love you, right? - Joke asked if Zo trusted him and Zo replied that he did. Because that was what really important they wanted to show us.

And that's why Zo was so patient with Joke, waiting for him to admit his lie. He faced his trauma of friends betrayal and he lived through it, also thanks to Joke. He saw how situations are quit similiar but he worked on it, he learned that things can happen and he should remember the experience for growth and learning but Joke is a different person, not his friends from the past. The past is the past and Zo won't run away or make a rush desicions. This is possible only if Zo acknowledged the situation and accepted it for himself. And we see that all that Zo wanted is honesty. And Joke, after some time of being goofy, did it again, didn't hide his feelings, made a confession and admitted things where he was wrong. And Zo was happy and teary because he was right this time. The trust he had for Joke was worth it.

And if suddenly a similar situation happens to him again, it won't break neither disappoint him as a reminder of a past expirience.

That's why I'm really happy right now with the direction Hidden Agenda are going. Because there's no mastermind plans or conspiracy theories behind them although I really love conspiracy theories. It's real life and it's that small things that can happen with everybody, that can hurt everybody.

#hidden agenda #hidden agenda the series #jokezo #some thoughts #the whole issue of HA is just really personal to me #to the person I was last year #never in my life of being in the fandoms i felt so represented as I do now while watching hidden agenda #tee bundit i see what you did here #it may sound messy but i just can't structure my thoughts better than this. maybe later

[gascon-en-exil]

A Game of Thrones 10th Anniversary Season Ranking: Part 2

Link to Part 1

Time for the bottom half of the list. The four seasons here will surprise no one, but the order might.

#5 Season 6

You can tell what I most what to talk about here...but there's an order to these things.

S6 actually has a bunch of great ideas, but they drown beneath the most slapdash plotting and character work the show has seen yet in order to set the stage for the narrower conflicts of the last two seasons. It's notorious for bringing back characters who haven't been seen in a season or longer only to kill them off (Balon Greyjoy, Osha, Hodor, the Blackfish, Rickon, Walder Frey) or awkwardly graft them back into the main plot (Sandor Clegane, Bran). There are plot threads that ought to be compelling but are too rushed in execution, like the siege of Riverrun, Littlefinger's hand in the Battle of the Bastards, or Daenerys's time back among the Dothraki and then finally getting the hell out of Meereen. Arya hits on the only interesting part of her two-season sojourn in Braavos - a stage play, of all things - only for it to stumble at the end with a disappointing offscreen death and some incomprehensible philosophy ahead of the start of her murder tour of Westeros. There's also so much cutting off the branches, enough to be conspicuous; the final shot of Daenerys leading an armada of about half the remaining cast she assembled partially offscreen says that better than anything else. Well, not anything....

Highlight: Without exaggeration, the opening of S6E10 is easily my favorite sequence in all of GoT. The staging, the music, the mounting suspense even as it becomes increasingly obvious what's about to happen, the twisted religious references particularly in Cersei's mock confession to Unella, Tommen throwing himself out a window because he can't deal with the reality of how terrible his mother is, how Cersei gives absolutely no fucks whatsoever about murdering hundreds of people at once in a calculated act of vengeance largely prompted by her own poorly thought out actions - I love it all. It's the single most masterfully-executed act of villainy in the whole show - Daenerys torching King's Landing probably has a higher body count, but the presentation there is all muddled - and if I had any doubts about Cersei being my favorite multi-season major character they were silenced in this moment. The explosion of the Sept doesn't sit perfectly with me, because I liked the Tyrells and because of what I said about deaths like theirs and Renly's in the previous post under S2, but I think that unease only cements the strength of this sequence. It's an overused phrase in fandom these days, but GoT at its best is all about moral greyness that gives its audience room for multilayered reactions. Cersei nuking the Sept and making herself the sole power in King's Landing, which in a sense is just a more overt example of the kind of character/plot consolidation elsewhere represented by Daenerys's armada, is one of those events that's impossible to approach from a single angle if you care about any of the characters involved. And hey, it's not in the books (yet, presumably), so unlike Ned's death or the Red Wedding the GoT showrunners can take the credit for realizing this one.

Favorite death: Even leaving aside the Sept and related deaths there's a lot of good ones to choose from in S6. Ramsey is cathartic but too gory for me, Osha's was a clever callback but a little delayed, it's hard to pin down specific deaths when Daenerys incinerates the khals, and Arya only gets half credit for Walder Frey and his sons when she saves the rest of the house for the opening of S7. I'm thinking Hodor, not so much because I enjoy his character or the manner of his death but because it's a clever bit of playing with language (that must have been hell to render in other languages for dubbing) wrapped up in some entertainingly murky consent issues and some closed time loop weirdness. It's all very...extra? Is that the word for it?

Least favorite death: Offscreen deaths continue to be mostly letdowns, in this case Blackfish and the Waif. Way to botch the ending of Arya's already near-pointless Braavos arc, guys. Speaking of Arya, this spot goes to Lady Crane, whom the Waif somehow kills with a stool or something. It's a dumb way to send off an entertaining minor character.

#6 Season 8

I swear that I'm not putting S8 this high solely because of Jonmund kind of sort of happening. I've never been very interested in either of them and the sex would be far too bear-on-otter to suit my pornographic preferences, but even so the choice to close out the series with them is hilarious.

I really don't need to elaborate on why S8 is down here; everyone who's ever watched the show has done as much in the nearly two years since it wrapped up. I do however need to explain why I've ranked not one but two seasons below it. My biggest argument here is that I don't believe it's fair to critique S8 for problems it inherited from earlier seasons. A non-comprehensive list:

Mad Queen Daenerys: unevenly built up beginning from S1 and continuing in some form through every following season

The questionable racial optics of Dany's army: also seeded as early as S1 and solidified by S3 with the Slaver's Bay arc

Cersei only succeeding because she makes stupid decisions and then lucks out until she doesn't: apparent from S1, directly lampshaded by Tywin in S3, fully on display with the Faith Militant arc of S5-6

Jaime not getting a redemption arc or falling in love with Brienne: evident with his repeated returns to Cersei throughout the show as one of the most consistent elements of his character, particularly in S4 and during the siege of Riverrun in S6

Tyrion grabbing the idiot ball/becoming a flat audience surrogate mouthpiece: started in S5 around the time the showrunners ran out of book material for him and wanted to make him more of a PoV character and his arc less of a downward spiral, although I've seen arguments that changes from the books involving his Tysha story and Shae set him on this trajectory even earlier

The hardening of Sansa's character: began in earnest in S4 and never let up from there

The strange ordering of antagonists: set down by S7's equally strange plot structure - the Night King had to come first with that setup

CleganeBowl and the dumber twists: from what I've heard the whole thing of writing around fans on the internet guessing plot twists started pretty much when the book content ended, so S5-6 maybe?

Yes, there's plenty to criticize about S8 on its own merits...but just as much that was merely the writers doing what they could at that point with deeply flawed material.

Highlight: This may sound cheesy, but the better parts of S8 are almost all the cinematic ones, whether that's E2 being a bottle episode with tons of poignant character send-offs before the big battle, a handful of deaths with actual satisfying weight like Jorah's and Theon's, and an epilogue that incorporates both closure for individuals and the broader uncertainty of messy socio-political systems that GoT has always been known for before working its way back to the Starks at the very end for some tidy bookending. Even imperfect moments like the Lannister twins' death and the resolution of Sansa's character felt weighty and appropriate based on what had come before.

Favorite death: Forget about the audio commentary attempting to flatten Cersei's character; Cersei and Jaime Lannister have an excellent end. Cersei especially, as the scenes of her stumbling her way down into the catacombs as the Red Keep crashes down around her really show off how her world is abruptly falling apart and how she retreats into her own self-interest at the end in spite of her demise being at least partially of her own doing. There's some stupid moments associated with these scenes, like Jaime dueling Euron to the death and CleganeBowl, but I can excuse those when the twins end up dying exactly where you'd expect them to: in each other's arms, in a ruined monument to their family's grand ambitions that, like Casterly Rock itself, was taken from another family.

Least favorite death: Quite a few dumb ones in S8 have become forever infamous. Missandei sticks out, and for me Varys too just as much because of how the writing pushes him to do the dumbest thing he could possibly do purely for the sake of killing him off ten minutes into the penultimate episode. But no one belongs here more than Daenerys Targaryen, killed at the height of a rushed and uncertain villain reveal by a man who takes advantage of their romantic history (who is also her family, because Targaryens) to stab her in a moment of vulnerability - pretty much only because another man tells him that Daenerys is the final boss. Narratively speaking that might be the case, but even so this is the end result of multiple seasons of middling-to-bad buildup. Not even Drogon burning the symbolism can salvage that. Also Fire Emblem: Three Houses did this scene and did it better.

#7 Season 5

...Yeah, we're going to have to go there.

Sansa's rape is not a plot point that personally touches me much. It's terribly framed in the moment and the followup in later seasons is inconsistent at best, but it's not a kind of trauma I can relate to. On the other hand, in the very same episode Loras is tried and imprisoned for homosexuality, and Margery faces the same punishment for lying for her brother. That hits much closer to home, not just for the homophobia but also for the culture war undertones of the not!French Tyrells persecuted by a not!Anglo fanatic who later reveals himself to be the in-universe equivalent of a Protestant. The trial is just one part of Cersei's shortsighted scheming, just as Sansa being married off to Ramsey is part of Littlefinger's, and both of them get their comeuppance in the end...but it's unsettling all the same. I especially hate what the Faith Militant arc does to King's Landing in S5, swiftly converting it from my favorite setting in GoT to a tense theocratic nightmare that only remains interesting to me because Cersei is consistently awesome. What's more, pretty much everything about S5 that isn't viscerally uncomfortable is dragged out and dull instead: the Dorne arc, Daenerys's second season in Meereen, Arya in Braavos, Stannis and co. at Castle Black. The most any of these storylines can hope for is some kind of bombastic finale, and while several of them deliver it's not enough to make up for what comes before, or how disappointing everything here builds from S4. S4 has Oberyn, S5 has the Sand Snakes - I think that sums up the contrast well.

Highlight: S5 does get stronger near the end. As much as his character annoys me I did like the High Sparrow revealing his pseudo-Protestant bent to Cersei just before he imprisons her, and there's a cathartic rawness to Cersei's walk of atonement where you can both feel her pain and humiliation and understand that she's getting exactly what she deserves (and this is what leads into the climax of S6, so it deserves points just for that). The swiftness of Stannis's fall renders his death and that of his family a bit hollow, but it's brutal and final and fittingly ignominious for a character with such grand ambitions but so little relevance to the larger story. The fighting pits of Meereen sequence is cinematic if nothing else, and even the resolution to the Dorne arc salvages the whole thing a tiny bit by playing into the retributive cycles of vengeance idea (and Myrcella knows about the twincest and doesn't care, aww - no idea why that stuck with me, but it's cute all the same). Oh, and Hardhome...it's alright. Not great, not crap, but alright.

Favorite death: I don't know why, but Theon tossing Myranda to her death is always funny to me. Maybe because it's so unexpected?

Least favorite death: Arya's execution of Meryn Trant is meant to be another one of the season's big finale moments, but the scene is graphic and goes on forever and I can't help but be grossed out. This is different from, say, Shireen's death, which is supposed to be painful to witness.

#8 Season 7

I can't tell if S7's low ranking is as self-explanatory as S8's or not. At least one recent retrospective on GoT's ruined legacy I've come across outright asserts that S7 is judged less harshly in light of how bad S8 was. If it were not immediately obvious by where I've placed each of them, I don't share that opinion.

Because S7 is just a mess, and the drop-off in quality is so much more painful here than it is anywhere else in the series except maybe from S4 to S5 (and that's more about S4 being as good as it is). The pacing ramps up to uncomfortable levels to match the shortened seasons, the structure pivots awkwardly halfway through from Daenerys vs. Cersei to Jon/Dany caring about ice zombies, said pivot relies largely on characters (mostly Tyrion) making a series of catastrophically stupid tactical decisions, and very few of the smaller set pieces land with any real impact as the show's focus narrows to its endgame conflict. As with S6 there are still some good ideas, but they're botched in execution. The conflict between Sansa and Arya matches their characters, but the leadup to that conflict ending with Littlefinger's execution is missing some key steps. Daenerys's diverse armada pitted against Cersei weaponizing the xenophobia of the people of King's Landing could have been interesting, but there's little room to explore that when Cersei keeps winning only because Tyrion has such a firm grip on the idiot ball and when Euron gets so much screentime he barely warrants. Speaking of Tyrion's idiot ball, does anyone like the heist film-esque ice zombie retrieval plotline? Its stupidity is matched only by its utter futility, because Cersei isn't trustworthy and nobody seems to ever get that.

And how could I forget Sam's shit montage? Sums up S7 perfectly, really. To think that that is part of the only extended length of time the show ever spends in the Reach....

Highlight: A handful of character moments save this season from being irredeemable garbage. As you can guess from my screencap choice, Olenna's final scene is one of them, even if Highgarden itself is given insultingly short shrift. S7 also manages what I thought was previously impossible in that it makes me care somewhat about Ellaria Sand, courtesy of the awful death Cersei plans for her and her remaining daughter. The other Sand Snakes are killed with their own weapons, which shows off Euron's demented creativity if nothing else. I like the entertainingly twisted choice to cut the Jon/Dany sex scene with the reveal that they're related. And, uh...the Jonmund ship tease kind of makes the zombie retrieval team bearable? I'm really grasping at straws here.

Favorite death: It's more about her final dialogue with Jaime than her actual death, but again I'm going to have to highlight Olenna Tyrell here for lack of better options. She drops the bombshell about Joffrey that the audience figured out almost as soon as it happened but still, makes it plain what I've been saying about how Jaime's arc has never really been about redemption, and is just about the only person to ever call Cersei out for that whole mass murder thing. There's a reason "I want her to know it was me" became a meme format.

Least favorite death: There aren't any glaringly bad deaths in S7, just mediocre or unremarkable ones. I still think the decision to have Arya finish off House Frey in the season's opening rather than along with their father at the end of S6 was a strange one that doesn't add much of dramatic value.

#Game of Thrones #GoT

[mbti-analysis]

Ok this won't make any sense but do intps and infjs have anything in common? I took a lot of tests and it's always one or the other so i'm really sure i am a Ti/Fe but i can't understand the Nx part. My enneagram is confusing bc i have both Ne and Ni well developed (Ni a bit more), my Se is poor and i rarely use Si

INTPs: TI Ne Si FeINFJs: Ni Fe Ti Se

Yes, they do have things in common, but it’s still a pretty wide stretch from one to the other. The thing with Ne/Ni and Se/Si is that you don’t use both. It’s really always one or the other, either Ne-Si or Ni-Se. In many respects, they are opposites, you see. And your stronger tendency will always be towards one, not both. One will always come naturally to you, but if you feel yourself inclined to act in the opposite manner, it will be you consciously acting so based on experience or someone’s advice. Your own natural tendencies will never allow both.

What it sounds like is that the tests that you have taken has Yes/No or Option A/Option B type of questions. These questions always pit two functions against one another, so if you answered both Ne/Se and Ni/Si questions from the intuitive standpoint, it would say that you have both Ne and Ni tendencies. That doesn’t make it true. You should try reading of the descriptions of the functions and figuring out your functions yourself rather than relying on such tests or trying to correlate your enneagram with your MBTI-type. To be quite honest, I wouldn’t rely on the enneagram test at all because it doesn’t do well enough at distinguishing the 9 types. It always leaves people confused, so unless you’re an expert of what each type is like, and maybe even then, it’s not very helpful at all.

I’ll copy/paste the descriptions of each function that you are confused about from one of my older posts. Reading the descriptions, try to figure out what truly comes naturally to you, and what maybe you just wish came naturally to you or you might admire. Forget about the tests and your enneagram. We’re starting back from square one.

Intuitive functions

Ni - Introverted intuition. People with strong Ni have strong intuition, and they can come up with ideas with little external stimulation. When they have ideas presented to them, they expand on them inwards. They see the bigger picture first and closely observe the details later. So they’ll work with one idea at a time, one picture, and then explore the different facets of the idea by connecting it to things they already know. It’s a very arbitrary process, and they won’t know how got from Point A to Point B, nor will they be able to explain it to anyone else. People with a strong Ni are really good with understanding different interpretations of one thing, but it’s a bit limited to what they know. Ni is also linked with imagination, so people with Ni tend to be very imaginative. Because it’s introverted and free of external stimulation, they don’t go wild with their imagination though; they keep it relevant and don’t find it hard to stay on task. They love research and finding more and more things about a certain topic. This is much NJs have a strong Ni.

Ne - Extroverted intuition. People with a strong Ne are very intuitive, but their intuition works closely with the outside world. When ideas are presented to them, they expand on them outwards. They’ll think of each idea as a detail itself in a bigger picture, and they’ll connect it with other details (other ideas) to get to the big picture. They work with multiple ideas at a time and often jump from one to the next very quickly, leaving a messy train of thought. They tend to be good at brainstorming. They can’t sit still and quiet for a very long time because there’s stimulation all around them. They also often have a very hard time falling asleep because their own ideas keep them awake. They’re often very good at arguments and debates because they can look at things from different people’s points of views. Though they may not understand certain views, much less agree with them, they can follow how they got to that conclusion. Structured debates aside, they also love discussions in general. They love research too, but they never stay on topic because they get caught up so easily. Their imagination is wilder, but they need external inspiration as a jump-start. NPs have a strong Ne.

Another way that you can distinguish between the two is through figuring out if you use deductive reasoning or inductive reasoning.

Deductive reasoning goes from the general to the specific - the big picture to the details. Here’s a quote on it: “In deductive inference, we hold a theory and based on it we make a prediction of its consequences. That is, we predict what the observations should be if the theory were correct.  We go from the general — the theory — to the specific — the observations.” This is Ni.

Inductive reasoning goes from specific to general - the details to the big picture. Here’s a quote on it: “In inductive inference, we go from the specific to the general. We make many observations, discern a pattern, make a generalization, and infer an explanation or a theory.” This is Ne. 

(Quotes by Dr. Sylvia Wassertheil-Smoller)

Neither tendency is better than the other, but when you come across information, you either analyze it inwards (connect it with different facets of the same idea, details) or outwards (connect it with other ideas, big picture). You don’t simultaneously do both. This is why it is highly doubtful that you have both “well-developed.” Shadow functions are never so developed that it interferes with your actual function stack. I don’t mean to insult you, but what you’re describing is impossible within the realms of the theory, and it is probably a misunderstanding.

Sensing functions

Si - Introverted sensing. People with a strong Si internalize information based on familiarity and act based on personal experience. They like knowing what to expect and often abide by personal schedules. They trust nothing more than experience because the past is the best resource we have. It’s not people who’ve researched the topic who know what they’ve talking about but people who actually have experience with the topic. They also tend to be very sentimental. They love gifts that are personal and have a lot of thought behind them because that’s how they assign value. They like things to be memorable and to mean something, so much so that they’ll become stories that they’ll tell for the rest of their life because their memories will be their greatest treasure. While telling stories, they pay a lot of attention to detail because they remember things like how it smelled or what the place reminded them of. They are usually very consistent with their opinions and what they believe, and this makes them very stable and trustworthy as well (ideally). SJs have a strong Si.

Se - Extroverted sensing. People with a strong Se experience the world with full speed ahead and live in the moment. It’s not about learning from their past experiences but about creating new ones that they’ll remember for the rest of their life. They tend to be very hands-on; they learn by doing things. Watching a demo isn’t likely to help as much as doing the experiment themselves. They’re also very in tune with their senses and aware of their environment because of that. They don’t do reckless/new things because of the memories because they never really look back; they do it because they want to in the moment. They’re very likely to act on impulses and least likely to regret trying something that they’re bad at and embarrassing themselves. They get bored of routine pretty easily and always like to be doing something different. When they’re out with their friends, they’re generally not the type to be on their phone or do their own thing; they like fully engaging in what’s going on. People with a strong Se are really easily affected by their environment. They like a lot of energy, so they’ll surround themselves with people like that usually. Don’t get nostalgic often. SPs have a strong Se.

You don’t find such countering tendencies in one person, and you don’t find that a person has neither tendency either. You will either be more experience-oriented or more present-oriented. You can’t be neither and call yourself a wholly intuitive person with no relation to the past or the present because something has to ground that intuition to reality. A person with nothing to ground it to reality is very very likely to go clinically insane.

Now let me also say this: my descriptions are based on what’s probably true about a person with a strong/well-developed function. The tendencies that I have mentioned are not exclusive to the functions that I’ve written them next to. People who do not have a strong Si can still be very nostalgic. I mean, the whole 90′s kids generation can’t be Si-dominant after all. That nostalgia can also be due to a strong Fi or you might be nostalgic about a show, a song, or anything from the past that spoke to another one of your functions, be it thinking, feeling, intuition, or sensing. You have to find a way to explain your tendencies yourself, an explanation that doesn’t include both Ne/Ni and neither Se/Si - find a more probable explanation. 

If you think you have neither Se or Si, then it’s almost certainly your inferior/weakest function, meaning either Ne or Ni is almost certainly your dominant function. If you are completely sure that you use Ti-Fe, then it is almost certainly your middle two functions. So your type is likely to be one of the following:

ENTP: Ne-Ti-Fe-SiINFJ: Ni-Fe-Ti-Se

I wouldn’t include INTP in this because when INTPs use Ne, it’s almost always grounded by their Si, so if you have very miniscule Si-inclination, it’s not very likely that Ne-Si are your middle two functions. ENTP seems more appropriate. Now if you want me to distinguish between ENTPs and INFJs in a post, I will, but most of what I will have to say will counter Ni and Ne, which I’ve already done for you. I can also talk more about Ne-Ti vs Ni-Fe if you want. Let me know.

#mbti #myers briggs #mbti theory #mbti type #mbti functions #mbti analysis #intp #entp #infj #ne #ni #se #si #perceiving functions #Anonymous #silence will fall when the question is answered