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carryforthtradition · 3 years

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Surprise Gift of Life - Part 2

25-30weeks pregnant

Between 25 weeks and 30 weeks lots of growing going on and the sensation of baby moving changes and grows stronger. I have noticed that after 30 weeks, my new pattern is active mornings, energy dipping in the afternoon, sometimes with naps or just chilling out on the sofa.

Due to my husband's working patterns, getting up as early as 4am, and my uneasy sleep patterns where I can wake regularly and then not settle for up to a hour, we have been sleeping in separate rooms. Not something that we wanted to do, but it has taken the stress out of things for the both of us. The other week he came down with a cold which then enforced the good, sleeping in different rooms was.

Though it has made me feel low at times, as the physical contact has been low, even more so with lockdown meaning no hugs from family.

To combat this and some negative idea and fears associated with giving birth, being that a shift to a 10 weeks countdown to due date suddenly felt very short and real, I started looking for antenatal classes and looking at videos to help with bathing, changing and tips for the first few days with a new born. All very eye opening and empowering, knowledge is power.

It did take me some time to find the right classes/group for me, most online courses cost anywhere between £34 up to £150, many being life group sessions, which didn’t suit myself or my husband, again due to work patterns and that I like face to face rather than online meetings. Keeping it focused more on supporting mental health and natural birthing, Hypnobirthing was suggested to me by my midwife, which I've found really energising and supportive for the person I am, as it aims to give power of what happens and how things progress back to the mothers.

Bump to Baby Chapters is the group I'm with, all recorded videos which means you can re-watch over and over again, exercises videos, music etc... low cost which makes it really accessible, Facebook page and also again with the idea of knowledge is power, you have both the physical aspects of what happens, for a first-time mum who has no idea what a contraction could feel like etc, was really helpful and eased fears and worries about how to cope with them and when they could start etc... and this thus supported the mental health aspect, looking at calming methods, positive reinforcements, affirmations and steps. Using these ideas, I have a board in the kitchen with lots of positive birthing quotes, which is growing as time goes on to include, phone numbers, breathing steps, helpful reminders of things to do, ready for when contractions start, as it‘s highly likely I will be home alone. But it’s also there for anyone who could arrive to support me, parents, sister or partner, that they know what I'd like or can help me in some way, if I'm not able to tell them.

Reaching 35 weeks, which is only 4/5weeks from the due date, makes this the last time I’ll post till after baby has arrived, and so what happens next will be in another blog post. So at this point, baby room is all ready for the little one, I’ve been talking family and partner through where things are and placing a box downstairs which contains baby changing kit and starting to pack baby bag and assemble my bag ready for the day when everything starts ups.

My Midwife will be coming to do a home visit, which means I can check through what I'd like my birth to be like, get any last advice and tips, hopefully my husband can get the day off work to be here too. Up to now he’s not been able to attend any scans etc... and at this point would most likely help him to unburden himself.

Overall, this journey has been quite lonely, mainly due to the lockdowns and so not being able to meet friends and family with children to get insights and advice, as much as I would have liked. Not working has been both good and bad, good in that I have been able to get things in order and be well prepared, but also trying to pace myself and not have anything to distract myself, like going to work 2 to 3 times a week, has made the weeks feel long.

I have learnt so much about myself, faced fears that I didn’t know I had and also learnt the value in sharing inner feelings, growing as a person as my baby has grown and let go of attachments to self in the process, or at least seen unhealthy ones that I'm working on letting go of.

Got very creative in this process as well, made a baby mobile, sensory felt toys and almost got a blanket finished, which I might ask someone else to finish if baby comes sooner than later.

Photo: Hand embroidery, with fabric paint background and patchwork layers. Patches made by friends and family being joined together to create a baby blanket.

Each day baby is growing, I can feel all his turns and stretches. It really is a wonderful, surreal feeling. I can feel his feet pushing agents my belly, and although I’m trying to not get impatient and enjoy these moment, including all the uncomfortable bits too, I can’t wait to hold this little bundle, see him stretch and hold on to his little feet.

The last of the baby stuff arrived, my dad’s blue silver cross pram, which he was sent when I was born and came all the way from Scotland. A rocking chair that my parents used when we (me and my sister) were small, and blankets from my husbands Gran.

A lot of extra weight being carried, so doing far less and with my due date 2/3 weeks away I’m not worrying at all about things I can’t do. Even going out for walks is only when I have the energy, as I have a wear a bump support else I get stitches. But I can still sit on the floor, cross my legs, get my soaks on and squat without to much fuss, and also I don’t get back ache, so I take the good with the bad.

I feel that it’s very important to not let the bad things pull you down, find a new rhythm and flow of life, because our bodies are truly amazing, they do so much without us directing them to do it, and when we learn to listen and trust in ourselves miracles happen.

That’s me signing off till after baby arrives.

Rose will return in May with: Modern Art in St Ives

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laurenbaileyctca · 5 years

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Art Fair Questionnaire

1) Blank- The minimalistic approach to the curation of the booth was similar to the gallery however only to a certain extent. The booth had a wider range of mediums and vibrant colours.

Stevenson- The booth differed in style and curation to the exhibition show however it was very similar to the curation of the showroom. Artists such as Penny Siopis and Zander Blom were featured both in the booth and the showroom.

Goodman - The crowed curation of the booth directly juxtaposed the gallery which had a space layout. There was also a variety of work and vibrancy to the colours used in the booth.

2) Artworks that I enjoyed:

Justin Dingwell, A Seat At The Table, 2018

Inkjet Print on Paper

I am very drawn to this work because of its technical skill and its aesthetic. I enjoy how the artists has played with a corresponding colour palette that accentuates the subject.The lighting is fantastic and brings focus to the subjects contrasts of their body. Studio photography can often lose the true depth of the concept however I think this could not have been created another way.

Arim Andrew, What They Want, 2019

Oil on canvas

I love the playfulness that the image portrays while overlaying a much harsher narrative. The lighting used is reminiscent of front lit studio lighting which adds interesting highlights all while juxtaposing the origin of the characters. The simple background brings forth the subject matter for me which brings focus to the details intended to convey meaning.

Ima Mfon, Nigerian Identity, 2015

Inkjet Print on Paper

Black and white portrait photography holds a special place in my heart. It holds so many emotions and stories within a single image. It can transport you to a different place or time all from looking into a strangers eyes. This piece conveys exactly that. A narrative through a strangers eyes.

Artworks I didn’t enjoy:

Chris Soal, The search for meaningfulness in the search for meaning, 2018

Concrete, and birch wood toothpicks held with polyurethane adhesive on ribstop fabric

This piece gives my a crazy amount of anxiety followed by chills up my spine. I understand that this work was intended to cause discomfort but for me it has passed the boundary of tolerable angst. I am very sensitive to textures, even looking at an unpleasant texture causes a flurry of uncomfortable emotions.

DD Trans, Unknown

Oil Painting and Balloon Ends

Honestly I absolutely hate this. The balloons look like little cat bums. Enough said.

Armand Boua, Les vièx môgô (Les grand frère), 2017.

Acrylic & collage on canvas

This piece hurts my eyes. It hurts to look at the lime green in the background which leaves me unable to fully focus of the foreground. I also feel it is bland and lacks depth.

3) There were a lot of paint mediums used in works as well as an increased amount of photography compared to last year.

4) The most obvious differences included labeling and curation of their pieces. Some works were close together on walls while others were spaced evenly apart. Some booths had no furniture where as others had an info desk or a seat for the viewers.

5) Some booths paid great attention to the labeling of the work and pasted labels neatly next to the work. Others printed labels but stuck they skew and some just had pencil marks on the walls i.e Siopis from Stevenson .

6) I feel that the fair is designed in a way to direct people straight to the big gallery names such as Stevenson and Goodman and then make their way outwards towards the smaller galleries and solo shows. I feel like a lot of good work is either missed or discarded through this layout.

7) The lighting differs slightly in each booth that has specific lighting for their work but overall the main lighting is bright and artificial. It reminds me of a grocery store.

8) The clothing is mostly neutral and monotone. Gallery black clothing is continued at art fair. However their were some individuals who enjoyed standing out by wearing vibrant colours and heavily patterned garments. What I mostly enjoyed was seeing some of the school kids bored out of their minds and resorting to mischief amongst their friends.

9) Although the art fair is advertised to the public it is mostly targeted to wealthy individuals who are interested in buying and investing in art. The art fair definitely encourages this by having extended VIP dates and extravagant events.

10) Marina Abramovic, Victory, 1997

Even though the works subject matter actually juxtaposes the ideology of wealth, the works worth is a spectacle in itself. It sold for 80 000 euros.

11) Kirsten Sims, In a Flash, 2019, Ceramic

Due to the functionality of the object Sims has created it feels misplaced amongst an array of “display” items. This piece unlike the rest is not just to be understood for its aesthetic worth.

12) I normally am very comfortable talking to strangers however at art fair I felt heavily scrutinized for my age and dress (I had a hole in my shirt which many women felt the need to make direct eye contact with) which made it harder for me to discuss work with people. I was almost laughed away by the people exhibiting Abramovic’s work when I asked for the price. It was 80 000 euros and apparently just as expensive to ask a question without utter judgement.

13) Investec is a prominent sponsor in the event. It is a private banking firm that only caters to those of a certain earning potential. I am certain that almost all of the VIP guests have accounts with Investec and would feel a sense of patriotism when they saw their bank was sponsoring the event. This helps build their relationship further and will encourage more people to lean towards Investec for cultural investments.

14) The CTICC is a very large space designed specifically for events like this. It has the capacity to cater to big sums of people and can plan events efficiently. It is also centrally located and easy to access. Events such as The International Tattoo convention and Design Indaba are also hosted at this site.

15) Albert Newall’s Untitled was made in 1952 through watercolour and ink on paper.

16) The youngest artist is a recent Michaelis graduate. Her name is Talia Ramkilawan and she is 23 years old.

17) The solo booths’ décor or paint on the walls correlate with the artwork. The space is integrated and has a stronger relationship with the works in comparison to other booths.

18) Georgina Gratrix- Gratrix’s process and the manner in which she paints is very intriguing and intense. The thick application of oil paint reminiscent to layers of make up entices people continue viewing her “pretty-ugly” work.

Igshaan Adams- The delicate nature of his work is very intricate and complicated. Through this intricacy he is able to communicate a wave of movement and narrative to the viewer.

19) I noticed a lot of work focusing on the subject of origin and identity. These are beautiful concepts that hold such a deeper meaning than when explored fully. Every human has an identity and every human can empathize with another’s identity (I HOPE) therefore creating a common understanding and concept to explore. Materials that frequented were Ink Jet Prints of photographs, weaving and sewing supplies and alternative materials for sculpture building.

20) I would love to be represented by Smith Gallery as I think they have a good understanding of how to work with young and up and coming artists. Their galleries tend to keep up with art trends and don't appear to fit into a particular mold.

21) I would love to work for WHATIFTHEWORLD as I have always found their exhibitions exciting and emotive. Their ability to transforms an artists vision into a physical space is quite remarkable. It would be an honor to be part of that team.

22) “I wonder if the maintenance team is going to be pissed about all the Ed Young balloons on the ceiling?”. “Do any of these works actually sell or is this just a giant publicity stunt?”.

23) For my booth I would build a ceiling so I could block off those horrid grocery store lights in the centre. I would black out the box inside and as my display I would have my fellow artists paint, write text, spatter on the walls of the few space using UV paint. Viewers would then be handed UV light torches to go and view the work inside the space. This way we are providing an experience rather than a commodity.

#CTAFTASK

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