#it's scary and so alienating snd i wouldn't wish it upon anyone i just can't function on the same level

[gurorori]

im so so sad i wish i could be an adult

#does anyone else get terrified of the fact they will never be an adult and adequately perform adulthood in any capacity #it might be subjective but i know i can't. everyone around us can without question but the moment i try my brain fails #im terrified of doing anything to escape this household bc i will be all on omy own #and i know i can't do that i will not survive but i have no choice and no support system i have NO ONE to rely on i have no outside contact #im so so scared. i was not taught any of the life skills and ilack the capacity to think or act like an adult and i know it's not something #i can acquire at all because everyone did by now. everyone did i wish i wasnt perpetually left behind and flailing trying to stay afloat #i hate everyone around me who set us up for failure i hate them for not being able to provide me at least the care and support i need #if i can hold down a job and that's very very questionable i will at least be happy with myself. that's something. #it's scary and so alienating snd i wouldn't wish it upon anyone i just can't function on the same level #something tells me it's okay bc normal brains supposedly don't finish developing til 25 but this is not considering developmental disability #but im so scared of being seen as incompetent and unserious and unreliable when we're already in our twenties #i wish someone could relate #maybe it's something to do with my source too as a system but i still genuinely feel like not a single thing changed since our teens i feel #so stuck and so stunted #i am nothing. perhaps. #vent #? idont even knoe