#lestat is rapunzel because he too has that annoying inner light

[rainbowcarousels]

25 Trinity Gate’s Do’s & Don’ts of Sex in Armand’s Bed 

(or place representing thereof) 

“Who’s your daddy?” will not be tolerated. “Who’s your mommy” will result in Lestat crying and while that doesn’t always ruin the mood, it does mean having to deal with it when there may be other plans for the evening.

The last person to use toys and equipment is responsible for making sure they are cleaned and put away properly. It’s not fair to have Louis do it, even if having them in alphabetical order helps when finding something.

Put everything back where you find it. The Georgian Library is not the proper place for a cat o’nine tails, even if I’m sure King George would have supported the efforts.

The list of safe words cannot be anything to do with parents, former masters or anyone else in the house who may hear it and come running. Sybelle is likely traumatised.

All blood is sacred and any spilled on bedding, carpets or any other surface must be licked up.

Lestat may not sulk if someone else is rightfully called a slut. He does not own the word and if he’s not being enough of one, that’s his problem.

Hair pulling is wonderful. Leaving hair you have pulled out on the floor so it gets tracked into the shower room is not.

Wearing pyjamas means you’re off-limits if you’re just not in the mood, unless you’re Louis. In which case, yes and no pyjamas will be negotiated by colour. 

All dressing must be submitted for dry cleaning before sunrise. Explaining the strains on the cheerleader costume was very awkward and those pom-poms had to be thrown away.

Any cracked walls or tiling needs to be free of blood before someone is called to repair itt.

When Bianca stays, she has first choice of activities and who with. This is just politeness. You must also ask before borrowing her jewelery, I’m looking at you Lestat. Those pearls are not anal beads. Those are in the drawer under the bed.

Reading is not permitted during sex unless previously agreed upon. Remember how upset Louis gets when his books get bloody or their spines broken.

Don’t leave pornographic materials on in standby mode. Marius came over to discuss court business and thtings became very awkward, very quickly.

No lit flames, not even for the purposes of dripping wax. Find another way to do it. Those curtains were 16th century.

Do not poke someone in the shoulder and ask them to move over because you want to watch what’s happening with the person they are pleasuring or punishing. Move yourself, they’re in the moment.

Pinwheels must be washed and sanitised before use. It’s not about infection, it’s about rust. Same goes for vampire gloves, the material will be damaged.

If you are blindfolded, no reading of anyone else's mind is allowed. Sensory deprivation experiments only work if everyone plays along.

You do not bring another person into the bed without agreement from all parties. That includes that stray cat, it almost got thrown against a wall when it was discovered that wasn’t Armand purring.

 Trains do not go up or in orifices without prior consent. It’s not being spontaneous, it's ruining their paint job.

Any collars must be lovingly maintained by their wearers. This is as close to a wedding ring as anyone is likely to get unless Lestat decides to have one of those mass marriages.

The Great Disney experiment is never to be repeated. We’re still finding glitter from fish scales in the carpet and that spinning wheel is an antique, not a prop.

The choking  is symbolic. We all know vampires don’t require breathing. Pointing it out will get you kicked out of bed.

No fake nails. We lost one up there and it still hasn't come out. 

No pet names are to be used outside the bedroom unless agreed upon whether the person is wearing a tail plug under their clothes or not. 

Other things that will get you removed from the bed: mocking Louis’ fuzzy rat socks, losing one of Armand’s rings in the sheets, smacking Daniel without asking for Armand’s consent first, breaking Lestat’s nails if he’s asked for them not to be, putting your hair in anyone’s face if they don’t like it, video conferencing the court while still naked in bed with everyone, smoking and not sharing (also bringing a lighter or matches, see the rule about matches), destroying lingerie and not replacing it, not properly securing the harnesses or breaking down the door (axe optional).

#between the healtth issues and it being mum's birthtday i haven't got another fic ready so hopefully this will suffice #armand bed pile #vckinkweek #vc #louis/lestat/armand/daniel #bianca cameo #this concept is largely nicked from birdy's house rules for agszc #i hope this is kinky enough to qualify #and party enough but like it's for all of them #if you want to know the disney armand is ariel because she too is a hoarder of weird things #louis is belle because books and a quiet inner strength #lestat is rapunzel because he too has that annoying inner light #daniel got cinderella so armand could play dress up