#like... do u not forget i still suffer the effects everyday!! they like rlly make me unable to form bonds with anyone. i told u this!! and | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

daccys-blog · 6 years

Text

hello angels ! wink wink. i'm kit, i'm nineteen and i ( never fcuking learned how to read ) use them/they pronouns. to keep it short, i can be really shit at ims or blast u w/ mssgs .... there is no in between and i'm srry ! also, i have discord so if anyone wants to plot or chat on there .... BTSLetMeKnow.mp3 ..... anyway, i've been highkey in love with harry styles for like six years and i'm also very into anime and even more into kpop ! talk 2 me abt bts ? pls.

to learn all about the muse i'll be playing ( i won't promise this intro is any good .... but when have i ever been good @ intros fhsidguh ), pls continue under the cut !

Is that [ HARRY STYLES ]? Nope, that’s [ DACEY WARD ], the [ TWENTY-THREE ] year old human who is [ A PART OF ] the resistance. [ HE ] works as a [ REVEREND ]. People say that [ HE ] is pretty [ + MAGNANIMOUS ] but can be [ - BROODING ]. ( kit / them/they / mdt )

so ! joining this rp is a pretty Big Deal for me bc i get to play ward in a universe where he makes absolute sense. also for the first time. thank u. although the plot has made things challenging in regards to his beliefs, it's honestly so fresh and he can brood Even More ? thank u. anyway .... i'm kinda just jumping into this without a specific format in mind .... just hope i find it along the way ! n hope i don't make it all confusing fhiusdhfg whatever happens after ur finished reading this .... my ims r open and i am up 4 explaining anything necessary to make a plot/connection w/ our charas.

HIS PAST ///

ward was born on feb 1st, 1994 ( yes this is harry's exact birthday fsdghuih thEY'RE BOTH AQUARIUS ?? MIGHT AS WELL )

two hours after his birth, he was handed to an endless system of foster care , being removed from foster home to foster home and waiting to be processed into a new , unknown family . as his age increased , his chances of adoption decreased , and by the age of twelve he convinced himself into forgetting about the idea of having parents , and siblings , and a house where he didn't feel like a stranger .

coincidentally , the year after that he was placed into a long-term home , with a family of three other foster kids and a couple in their forties who had children that had already married and moved away - they needed the money , but that didn't mean they treated ward and the other children like emotionally neglected pets .

these foster parents taught him the word of the lord . ward had grown up around so many people , each with different opinions and views towards angels , that he hadn't formed an opinion of his own . he just felt pain from the suffering of others , and that was enough to breed hesitance when agreeing to the way angels were captured and held against their will . in one occasion , when he was twelve and hadn't been moved to his long-term home , he shared his views about disliking the way angels were treated ( because in the words of a twelve year old: "it's not their fault they were born that way" ) , and his foster dad at that time ( who had been sharing his own opinions regarding angels which entirely contradicted ward's feelings ) beat him with a broom stick to ' knock some sense into him ' . this is what resulted in ward being moved out of that home .

he quickly learned that his new foster parents would never do something like that , though . a huge part of him was relieved to learn that they were part of the resistance although he didn't know what it was at that time .

he didn't share their beliefs right away , though ... it was one thing to be glad about not being beat with a broom because he disliked the way angels were treated , and another thing to accept god into his life . so he didn't , for years .

as far as he was aware , god was gone . this is what they taught in history classes . he knew that there were groups of people which still believed that god would come back , but there was never much room for thought about them .

instead , he became an unruly teenager with massive abandonment issues . in his own quiet way he would be defiant of authority and his foster parents , thinking he owed nothing to the world because nothing owned him . nothing really owned him . not like a parent would . nothing like a real parent .

in his rebellious years , ward experienced a taste of utterly wild youth , until the cancer was detected . he didn't tell anyone about the pain because a part of him wanted it to be a sickness . a part of him wanted to die . a part of him wanted to see what else there was , or wasn't . a part of him always felt like it was living in darkness , anyway .

he was rushed to the hospital after collapsing down the flight of stairs in his house , effectively fracturing a wrist along the way . after hours of waiting for test results , the news was broken that he had bone cancer in his lower right leg -- right below his kneecap . in the end ward didn't know what to do with the information . he was both terrified and trying to convince himself that it's what he wanted . he was eighteen , about to turn nineteen .

his foster parents offered the support they could . it wasn't their obligation to pay for ward's hospital bills , or to make sure he was receiving the right treatment , or to make sure he was fine at all , but they took a bit of the burden upon themselves and tried their best to give him mental and emotional support by using the lord's word .

it was determined that he'd receive almost immediate surgery to remove the cancer before it spread any further -- and through this process ward thought he reached the lowest low with his mental health , but he hadn't been told the surgery had failed yet . that came months after .

the pain subsided for a while , just for a few months , and then it grew unexpectedly . on his next long stay at the hospital , he was scheduled for an amputation . this was both a period of a total darkness and the appearance of a blazing light . it was when he lost a part of his body but gained a powerful part of his soul when he opened his heart to god .

after his surgery , ward began recovery and got fitted with an artificial leg . it felt like a beginning , more than anything . in a way he felt like accepting god into his life was almost like being reborn , and he had to learn to walk again .

when he left the hospital , his entire focus went to studying the word of the lord . his faith grew everyday , praying to god and having the hope that he was listening , praying for his return -- learning what true desire meant .

his plans to fuck pursuing an education were replaced by the drive to get into a college and major in bible studies . he had the support from his denominational committee to become a reverend for the church he had been occasionally attending during his long term stay at his foster home to indulge his foster parents , but more recently visited several times a week to pray and attend sermons .

the church was about to close its doors due to the pastor falling ill and unable to tend to it -- there weren't many believers who could fill up the spot , and the church did close for three years while ward studied and did all of the requirements , until a new pastor had it reopened at the nick of time for ward , who right after started working there as a reverend under the guidance of his new pastor .

nowadays you can find him in the church , giving studies on the different teachings of the bible and occasionally given the opportunity to deliver sunday sermons .

HIS BELIEFS //

i wanted to include a section for his beliefs since they are a massive part of his life !!

ward has faith that god did not forsake the angels , or humans , and that he will come back . he prays everyday for his return , having the faith that he is listening .

he tries not to question god for the things that have happened , but sometimes he gets a desperate feeling in his chest that has him crying out ' why ? ' . the angels .... rlly haunt him . he prays a ton for them , but he also can't help but wonder why they fell ... why god left . why would he allow the angels to suffer as much as they have ? as much as they are suffering

it ... really fucks him up so bad . he often has breakdowns about it . there are two opposite sides playing tug of war inside of him -- one of them is the one that's winning most of the time , the one that doesn't dare question god , and the other side is one who only has small victories but tugs with the force of tidal waves that literally leave him shaking -- the secret side that contemplates whether god is good .

it burns him a li ve haha a

although that secret side of him exists , it's something he also prays about . he doesn't want to question god , or have his faith waver , but goddamn ... it's tough when he sees all of the shit the angels are put through ... it really hurts his heart so much .

that being said , he is not hostile at all toward angels . or thinks he is above them in any way form or shape . he actually worships angels , and hopes for their safety above all else . that is why he is a part of the resistance and would not hesitate to help an angel , in whatever form . he believes they are god's perfect creations that have been tainted by human sins .

regarding other aspects of his life, though: ward repents for allowing god into his life only until he needed it and not when he was at his doorstep . he repents for all of the sins he's committed in the past and for the sins he continues to commit . he no longer drinks , smokes , or parties . he also doesn't get tattoos anymore unless they're connected to god or religion , and even then , he has only gotten a small tattoos of crosses on his chest and another cross on his right hand .

HIS PERSONALITY/SMALL FACTS ///

although ward is welcoming of other people and relationships , especially in a church setting ... he can also be hesitant . he will give advice and try to guide anyone who seeks his help with the word of god , and he will listen to people's troubles and be with them in times of need ... but he doesn't do this himself . he keeps it all pent inside and really only speaks to god about what's going on inside of him .

he has a very long past of abandonment and trust issues that it's almost like an instinct to close himself away but he's trying to heal those parts of himself . just needs some time and all the faith he can have !

with that being said , if you meet him outside of the church , he can come off as very withdrawn , especially in a mundane setting . he tends to be soft spoken and serious , though he's also got some wild in him that loves to laugh and have a good time . you just kinda have to figure out how to get to it .

it's not really easy getting to know him . he's very private about his personal life and it's very rare when he opens up about something personal , unless he's talking to his pastor .

he doesn't really talk about his experience with cancer either . it was a really tough time in his life that he hasn't healed from and part of him probably never will . the only times when he openly talks about it is when he's retelling his experience of how he let god into his life .

also ! he uses a wooden cane . at first he needed it during his recovery , because it made standing up so much easier and he didn't have to lean on people or tables or chairs . then, he decided to keep the cane with him at all times after one occasion in which he supported himself on a glass table as he stood up and the glass broke and fell on his foot ........ but thank god it fell on his prosthetic foot because that would've hurt like a bitch .

so now his cane is like .... an extension of himself . kind of like how people can't leave their house without their phones , except more important to him .

he also never mentions it unless someone asks why he uses it . he'll just say he has some leg problems , and if they continue to ask , he'll wonder why they're being nosy and reluctantly say he's got a prosthetic leg . talking to people about it or easily saying he has a prosthetic leg just doesn't come to him .

going into a new topic, ward doesn't really have a sexual preference , and he doesn't have many sexual tendencies . or romantic ones . he's very unconcerned about a love life in general right now . the closest he gets to experiencing romantic love is when he's performing a wedding ceremony . he has dated in the past though , especially during his teenage years , but he hasn't been in a relationship for a few years now .

he doesn't tend to go by dacey . there's no real reason why ... he was just called ward as a child by teachers and some foster parents so it stuck around . he introduces himself as ward but doesn't really mind being called dacey ... just throws him off a bit at first , he's not used to it .

so ! i think i'm gonna leave it off there !! this entire post was pure word vomit fhiusdhf but if you have any plots/connections in mind don't hesitate to hmu , i'll be very excited about them . i'm sorry for the massive mess this was fhdsui but i'm rlly excited to get rolling !! see u on the dash/ims my friens

#winged:ooc #⦁ — › OwO ᴡʜᴀᴛ's ᴛʜɪs? — ⌜ ᴏᴏᴄ ⌟#( iTS HERE !! )#( honestly ... u dont have 2 read fhsidghu )#( im gonna jump on the starter tag probably !! )

2 notes · View notes