#my brain has a pre-installed ''good work is appreciated'' medule because i appreciate good work

[psalmsofpsychosis]

This is gonna sound weird, but i'll forever be confused by the feedback artists get. I come across a work on ao3 and i'm like "hmm, the writing style is ordinary and the tone is lackluster, it's okay, there's effort put here so i appreciate it. I estimate this having like, 5 comments and maybe 20-something kodus" and then i look and it's got 95 comments, 500+ kodus, 80 bookmarks. And then there are works that have my soul trying to escape my body like "this is unbelievably intricate and complex and gorgeous and it's such unconventional and fresh and creative take, the writer's voice is so unique and delicate and enticing, i bet this is up there in stratosphere with the amount of feedback this has because it's so exceptional in execution" and then i look and it barely has 8 comments, maybe 20-something kodus, and it's just. It's incredibly confusing to me because i always assume that quality execution where the artist's heart is in it is obvious, other people see it like i do, and they most definitely appreciate it like i do. And there are the few people on the cusp of these two categories, people who write well and get a lot of recognition for it, good for them, but 9 out of 10 cases of good writers i stumble upon, they're practically invisible. This is less of a phenomenon in visual arts because people seem to be more freehanded with those, it's an easier medium to navigate i guess. But literature and fanfic? i'll never understand the way people navigate those. Leaving aside the "first 50 popular fics of any ao3 tag are hot dumpster fire" rule of thumb (which is very true, and the number goes higher the more popular something is), the rest of it just feels like lucky strikes to me and not really a matter of quality execution. It's not a lucky strike, it's the fact that people lean towards supporting their friends and people they love rather than judging the actual quality of the work

#which is fine i guess #like it's really about people liking the person so they love the work too and offer lots of feedback #and vice versa #it's just that i really look for quality creations and i dont really care if i'm friends with someone #my friendship with someone doesn't decide the quality of their art lmao though i WILL love them with all my heart #but the fact that people seem to only engage with and offer feedback to art whose creators they like???? infinitely baffling to me #it's weird to me because way back in my teen years i'd say ''i want my work acknowledged and loved'' #and i'd be told ''honey you need to find more friends who love your work'' and i'd be like ?????? #this is not a comtext of friendship i need people to acknowledge my work because there's skill in it; it's competent and it's creative #and it's good work. it's good execution of the craft #and the idea that i had to offer myself up and ''befriend'' someone and be actively available and responsive to them #just to have the good craftsmanship of my work noticed was very irritating and annoying to me. A craft is a craft; friendship and affinity #is an entirely different concept; these two shouldn't correlate imo #kinda unrelated but this is also why the concept of ''networking'' makes me barf like #''oh you need to chimmy your way in you need connections'' fuck you the quality of my work speaks for itself #i dont want to offer availability and a ''friendship'' i do not mean just to just to have my craft acknowledged it feels so intrusive #and unfair #anyway yeah. this is not hipster talk but a lot of writers and artists that i adore are more or less invisible and i'll never get it #my brain has a pre-installed ''good work is appreciated'' medule because i appreciate good work #(given the artist is a normal person and not a fucking asshole) #but to me it feels like people say ''i appreciate people and only in extension of that i appreciate the work''