#nd when i see them complaining abt their shit i feel like cutting their intestines in little pieces no I'M NOT BELITTLING THEIR STRUGGLES

[raen1]

this insane unhealthy urge to do everything on my own is making me want to scream my lungs out

#ive this habit of noting things down on my hand and when it smudges i lose my shit it feels like i have failed to do that task bcs #independently i feel my brain isnt capable of absorbing info and i need to note everything down on a. paper its tiring #it feels like my head will explode god pls i cannot do this i cannot keep track of things i am so .so tired #i have written down exam dates of my friends #friends who are v v dumb and wont even think about me until i text its prolly bcs i care too much but it hurts and #i wish to move on w my life w everything w people just get over it i am sure ppl around me doesn't know loneliness like i do #nd when i see them complaining abt their shit i feel like cutting their intestines in little pieces no I'M NOT BELITTLING THEIR STRUGGLES #but they need to really calm down . #i have noted down my shit my ma'am shit my siblings shit my dog shit and stuck it on a wall and my head hurts when i look at it #sticks and stones may break my bones but words can also hurt me how will i forget the mean things i have heard over the yrs #rant #chaotic academia #desi academia #dark academia #older sibling #oldest sibling #eh idk