#not me angry crying at 12.30 am no sir could not be me

[neonacidtrip]

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#. #not me angry crying at 12.30 am no sir could not be me #im so annoyed #i made it very far through this terrible cursed day of the year #spent the last several hours in isolation skipped dinner #and i have to persevere through this headache because i have been waiting on someone to get back to me on something #theyre several hours late on the call and when it finally happens its less than 15 minutes and essentially covered nothing important #i got out of bed for this #on the worst day of the year #i would like to be put into a coma now please 12 years would be good #12 years and one month so that i dont wake up in bloody march #today may have been the worst day of the year but the rest of march still sucks too and im not looking forward to it #im honestly not even crying its just that frustrated 'i almost started crying but immediately lost the sensation' kind of hell #like a lost sneeze #i cant even go to bed now between this headache and the fact that i put off chores to take this call so now i have chores to finish #gosh i hate ranting on tumblr it just reminds me of why i left tumblr the first time around #but i have literally no person on this earth i can rant to anymore and i get reported whenever i rant on facebook #which is the biggest joke ever by the way how dare i be sad on the boomer website clearly i must be reported #its not even like a useful kind of reported all that happens is i get an annoying 'people are worried about you have you tried therapy #kind of message that doesnt tell me who the alleged worried people are #times like this i feel like i should put in more effort to make friends but ive grown so use to this sense of never venting to real people #that im pretty sure i could make 100 friends and id still never vent to them #especially since in all of my most recent friend groups the people liked to vent to me but never let me vent to them #id get therapy if i werent in america but i am so vague posting on tumblr is unfortunately all i have left to turn to #i just want march to be over and for all this stress to finally go away #i want to have something constant in my life again so im not continuously trapped in this hell of other people making my life choices #i especially want she who will not be named to stay as far away from me and my life choices as possible but that is a wholeee separate rant #maybe if i read something sad and go cry in the shower ill calm down #neo rambles #neo rants