#oh no…… it’s the masochism speaking guys…. LMAOO

[callilouv]

I don’t think I hate anybody as much as I hate myself

#cw rant #ʕ •ᴥ•ʔ idle chit chat #nobody treats me as bad as I do #nobody speaks of me as bad as I do #everybody is always so nice to me and I just feel so undeserving of that :( #maybe that’s why I kinda prefer it when ppl show their care for me through bullying/teasing yk? #idk . I’m not used to being showered in 100% love and it feels weird bc #my mind is so used to calling myself u deserving of such nice things #that I’ve kinda grown fond of friends affectionately bullying me lmao #DYK WHAT IM TALKING ABT?? #probably why lock is one of my closest friends atm bc . lock is definitely not nice to me HEIWBDIX #oh no…… it’s the masochism speaking guys…. LMAOO #idk I think I just focus on my negative traits too much that I forget the more positive ones #i need to think more highly of myself . sigh #the julian and kaveh kinnie in me is showing🌝