#somewhere… i have Tag….. about hey OPEN your mouth i need to see your TEEFS

[lady-of-skyhold]

I Don’t Know What To Do With My Hands. - A CloTi Fan Fic

My first fic in a long time. What better way to get back into the swing of things than with Cloud x Tifa. My OTP. c: 

- 10.5k words. Rated M. Completed.

 NSFW Chapters on AO3

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A strip club.

Could Zack be more of a cliché?!

The neon sign baring the name “Seventh Heaven” burned so brightly that Cloud swore he could read it through his eyelids, a headache already beginning to stir.

“Oh, don’t look like that, Cloud. It’s not that bad! It’s way more respectable than that Corneo’s gig.”

Cloud refrained from pointing out that Corneo’s place wasn’t exactly hard to beat – in entertainment value or health and safety standards. Regardless, he took notice of Zack’s enthusiasm about the club and with a sigh, pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Let’s get this over with then.”

The grin on Zack’s face was infectious even to the blonde ex-SOLDIER, a gleam in his eyes the only outward sign of amusement, but to Zack it was all the encouragement he needed. Zack laughed, clapped his hands together and strode right behind him, hands placed on Cloud’s shoulders as he ushered him off of the city street and through the door, giddy with excitement.

“Atta boy! You won’t regret this, I promise. Once we get a few Cosmo Canyons in ya, you’ll be a new man! Come on, the others are already inside.” Cloud shook his head, unsure how his introverted self ever became friends with the living definition of “extrovert” that was Zack Fair and also dreading to think what a “Cosmo Canyon” even entailed. But it was Zack’s bachelor party on the eve of his wedding to Aerith, and if this is where he chose to celebrate it then Cloud would at least try not to hate it. He’d really try.

They walked into the establishment together, Cloud with his eyes fixed on his feet and Zack strutting as if he owned the place. The quiet blonde braced for jarring club music, but it never came. Instead smooth, sultry jazz emanated from a live band playing on a stage nestled in the far corner of the room. Red curtains, faint cigar smoke and soft low lighting surrounded him.

It certainly was no Honeybee Inn.

Small round tables littered the area before the stage, candles flickering at each one. Some patrons filled these tables simply enjoying the music and a drink, their fingers drumming on the table matching the tempo of the band. Others sat in booths set to the side of the room, a bottle of champagne in a chilled bucket on the table and a beautiful woman at their side or - those Cloud quickly glanced away from - on their lap, wrapped in nothing but fine lingerie and a sheer robe. 

Similarly dressed woman floated past the two ex-SOLDIER’s as they headed for the bar, their robes open to expose the lingerie beneath and flowing behind them gracefully as they slipped past, hips swaying wide to the accompaniment of the double bass that Cloud could feel in his chest, even stood as far as he was from the band on their stage. Multiple women greeted Zack by name as they passed which said to Cloud his friend had frequented Seventh Heaven more than he let on. Zack simply shrugged good naturedly.

“Aerith’s friend runs this place, we drop off flowers every once and a while.”

He gave a small nod and spotted another woman approaching, growing nervous Cloud darted his eyes around to settle them somewhere not involving bare skin before choosing to stare at a spot on the floor where plush carpet met the dark stained wood of a dance floor. Zack felt Cloud’s shoulders tense and gave them a small squeeze while directing him towards the bar. He grounded himself in the security of his friend’s grip on his shoulder, the man literally having his back, and let his shoulders drop from up near his ears.

“Relax, man. It’s gonna be a good night. Have I ever led you astray before?” Cloud was tempted to throw a dirty look over his shoulder at him, remembering that time Zack convinced him it was a great idea to cast Fira on a camp fire during basic training. His eyebrows had never grown the same since that day.

It was a hell of a campfire though.

As the pair drew closer to the bar, they spotted the rest of their party. Barret, an unmissable giant of a man, occupied a large portion of the bar himself. He was stood gesticulating wildly as he told whoever was working behind the bar a story of his glory days as a freedom fighter, no doubt. An older man sat hunched over in his bar stool beside Barret, his elbows propped up on the bar as he sipped a whiskey, definitely Cid. And a tall, thin man sat at the very edge of the bar where it curved to meet with the wall. His back rested against said wall as he surveyed the room, from body language alone Cloud knew it to be Vincent; never one to drop his guard, Cloud revelled in the fact someone else would be watching his back.

Vincent noticed the two ex-SOLDIER’s approaching and tapped on the bar to catch the rest of the party’s attention, whom all turned and raised a glass to herald in the man of the hour, it really was a rag tag group of friends to celebrate with but Zack couldn’t have been happier to see them.

“You finally made it! Was beginning to think you’d done a runner. And I was just contemplating which kneecap I was gonna break first, for Aerith’s sake.”

Zack barked a loud laugh, and slapped Barret on the back.

“You’d have to have caught me first!” They bantered, Zack pretending to jab the much larger man in the ribs as Barret took him in a headlock and messed the raven spikes atop Zack’s head with his prosthesis.

Cloud took special notice of how easily Zack bounced off of other people, allowing a small pang of envy at his friend’s confidence before pushing it aside to enjoy his night.

Their friends parted to make room around the bar, Cloud pulling himself up onto a barstool and settling slightly self-consciously, nodding in greeting to the others before picking imaginary dust off his jeans as Zack made conversation with the bartender.

"Teef, my girl! Have no fear, your VIP is here" Zack took a small, half-bow from his seat and beamed his classic charming grin at the barkeep.

"I can see that. Good to see you, pup! What can I get for you tonight?”

A wholly feminine voice spoke up and dragged Cloud’s attention from his lap to behind the bar. The first thing he noticed was silk. Smooth, black silk.

Smooth, black, dangerous, silk.

The woman behind the bar stood wrapped in a short kimono-styled robe that caught the light as she shuffled her weight from each foot, taking in Zack’s round of drinks he bought for his party. The second thing he noticed was her hair; Cloud really wasn’t sure where her hair ended and her robe began. So similar was the sleek shine of the long, dark tresses to that of her silken robe. Despite the ribbon tied tight around her waist – Cloud paying extra attention to the way it created a dramatic curve of her silhouette- the sleek material was pulled taut and extra shiny across the fullness of her chest, trying desperately to conceal her enormous…

Wine coloured eyes filled his focus as he snapped his eyes away from dangerous territory, thankfully her eyes still focused on Zack. A blush blazed hot across Cloud’s nose. He desperately tried to look anywhere but the tempting valley of flesh that disappeared beneath the neckline of her robe and safely dropped his eyes to his lap, wishing to be back in his comfort zone, far away from jazz and alcohol and silk.

Alas, a quick elbow to his side brought him back to the uncomfortable present and Cloud met Zack’s gaze, a dark eyebrow raised as he looked at Cloud in question.

“What drink do you want, dude?” Cloud opened and closed his mouth several times, unsure of what to order, or what to say. Zack had many dealings with Cloud’s shy, quiet way of communication but never had he seen him entirely struck dumb before.

“Urm, he’ll just have what I’m having.”

“Coming right up.” She answered Zack.

Cloud once more dropped his head, content to listen to his friends chatter around him. He was too preoccupied staring a hole into the bar floor to notice his closest friend tilt his head to one side like a curious dog, and narrow his eyes as he examined him. 

Too deep into his thoughts, Cloud was oblivious to his audience as his eyes drifted up from the floor ever so slowly to settle on Tifa’s back while she got to work preparing drinks on the other side of the bar.

Although the silk gave no hint of what lingerie lay beneath - such as the sheer robes the dancers wore - from this angle, anyone sat at the bar could see the outline of suspenders clipped onto stockings just out of sight beneath the hem of Tifa’s robe. A dark line ran down the centre of her stockings, the entire length of her leg, and Zack watched as his younger friend’s eyes followed, marvelling at the length and strength of each leg, topped off with black stiletto heels with red bottoms.

In all the years of their friendship, Zack had never witnessed Cloud take interest in a girl before. Suddenly, his friend’s new found muteness made sense and an idea began to form in his cunning mind.

Without turning his head from Cloud’s direction, Zack spoke.

“Hey, Teef? Have you still never danced yet?”

“No, I'm just a bartender Zack.” Her modest answer floated across the bar as Tifa continued making drinks with her back to the party.

“Would you consider a private?”

“Remember you're marrying a friend of mine tomorrow, Pup.” She laughed.

“Oh, it’s not for me. It’s for him.” Cloud’s head whipped round to catch Zack’s knowing smirk before Tifa turned to face them.

“Zack, what are you up to?” Tifa placed her palms down on the bar and cocked one hip. Eyebrow raised in question.

“Well, y’know, I was just thinking. Doesn’t Johnny like to stop by around this time?” Tifa showed only a small amount of panic as her eyes flickered to an old clock hanging on the wall behind Zack’s head, he was right. Within the next 10 minutes Johnny would surely arrive to begin his nightly routine of flirting – borderline harassing- Tifa until the end of her shift.

“Your point being?”

“Well, my buddy Cloud here gets a little overwhelmed with crowds, and I feel bad for dragging him way outta his comfort zone for my big night. Why not take care of 2 birds with one stone. You both get to hide in a private room until the coast is clear and my friend here has settled into the night. I know you'll take good care of him.”

Tifa turned to look at Cloud who refused to make eye contact and had one hand nervously rubbing the back of his neck.

“I don't know, Zack.”

“I’ll pay double what you’d make out here on bar. No Johnny, no pressure to dance - just serve some drinks to this poor Chocobo head and make my bachelor party a little easier for him, huh?”

Cloud was expecting a polite decline, maybe a “Thanks, but no thanks” after he felt those red eyes of hers take note of his nervous fidgeting, and yet -

“Alright, I’ll do it.” Cold sharp nervousness spread from Cloud’s stomach and sent a shiver up his spine, his eyes zipping between his friend and the barmaid incredulously.

That was unexpected.

“Excellent! You’re an angel, Teef!” Zack slapped a hand on Cloud’s shoulder and gave him a wink, Cloud gaped.

“I know.” She said cheerily and finished preparing the drinks Zack ordered, setting them down in front of each of them. A Bloody Mary sat in front of Vincent, another whisky for Cid, a surprisingly fruity smelling and colourful cocktail sat in front of Barret and two shots were placed before Zack and Cloud.

Stepping out from behind the bar, Tifa turned towards Cloud and gestured for him to follow. She offered him a warm and friendly smile that lit up her entire face, a smile which made Cloud’s Adam’s apple bob on a visible -and almost audible- gulp.

Zack picked up his shot and placed Cloud’s in his hand.

“Hey, do me a favour, enjoy yourself.”

Looking nervously at his shot, Cloud clinked it against his friend’s glass; downing the shot in one go, both grimacing at the burn of alcohol and the following shiver that racked through their bodies.

Cloud took one last deep inhale, pushed himself off of his barstool and followed that dangerous silk further and further away from his comfort zone without daring to look back.

“He’s a goner.” Spoke Vincent, quietly.

“Oh yeah.” Remarked Zack, as he giggled at his smitten friend following the barmaid like a lovesick puppy dog.

#cloti #Cloud x tifa #tifa x cloud #zerith #zack x aerith #Yuffientine #If you squint #FFVII #FFVIIR #Fanfic #My writing